Hey! New chapter up for Save Me! Thanks to those reviewers/favoriters/alerters! You guys are awesome. And sorry about the long delay for the readers out there (again) CDM has started school and it keeps her busy :( .. sorry again (her especially). I(we) hope you enjoy this chapter!

We don't own twilight..unfortunately.

Chapter Seven

JPOV(CDM)

I woke up on the couch in the living room, after Rose woke up screaming earlier I couldn't sleep. So I came down here and just tried to take my mind off of everything. I still had an hour before I had to be awake but I couldn't keep my eyes shut any longer. I ran a hand through my hair and pulled my shirt off over my head, feeling extremely uncomfortable. I hated the feeling of my clothes sticking to me while I sleep. It makes me feel like I'm in a hospital again. I walked out to the back porch and pulled out a cigarette.

With a long drag, I let the smoke seep into my lungs before exhaling. It felt good, too fucking good, to have a smoke in the morning. The chilly air felt good against my heated skin, the breeze caressing my body in a calming way. I leaned forward on my elbows as I looked out into the Cullen's big backyard and took another drag. I remember this yard from when Rosie and I were really young. I was probably four, so I know Rose doesn't remember it like I do. It was when my mom and Esme were still talking on good terms. It was one of the good times when my dad was gone. Of course he came back and Esme and mom just never patched things up for a long time. It was years and years until they were friends again.

Rubbing the back of my neck, I took a deep breath before hearing the door open behind me. I turned to see Charlotte standing in the doorway dressed in one of Peter's shirts as a nighty. She tiptoed toward me and hopped up on the porch railing next to me, leaning against the white wooden column.

"Me and Pete just didn't want to interfere with Rose that's why we didn't come out to see her." She explained quietly.

I shook my head before handing her my cigarette. "Don't worry about it. I didn't expect you to. It's been a long time since she's been like this. I really do hate when that fucker comes to town."

"Jasper," Charlotte sighed. "He saved Rose from something that she should never have had to go through. Just like you did with Bella."

I took the cig back and leaned in between her legs. Her arms snaked around my shoulders as I rested my head back on her shoulder. "And he's the exact reason why I won't tell her, or anyone for that matter. Don't you see what he does to Rose? She gets so excited he's coming and then the nightmares come. He only brings her pain and reminds her of all the shit she's been through."

"He brings her happiness and strength," Charlotte murmured. "I know, that bothers you. That you weren't there for her but you were there for someone who means the world to her. And from what I could see, it doesn't have to be that way."

I shook my head, "Don't Char. I don't think I can bare any of this shit anymore."

"Just like I can't back home," she whispered to me.

"I'm sorry I wasn't there. I should've-Peter should've-"

"You can't always protect me. And you don't have to. I don't need bodyguards. I can handle it myself."

"Is that what you call handling it?" I asked as I turned in her arms and moved her blue hair from the side of her face, looking closely at the purple-yellow bruise.

"It's fine Jasper. It wasn't the worse he's done to me. I'm just glad I'm gone. I'm just glad he'll leave me the fuck alone. I like it better at home with Pete and Sandra."

"It's where you belong." I told her.

She took my cigarette for the final few drags before I put it out in the dirt. "And this is where you belong. You deserve a good life Jasper."

"Bella deserves a good life too, and Rose, but they will never get it."

"Ugh!" Charlotte groaned. "You're such a downer!"

I smiled and kissed her nose. "I think that's why we never worked out."

"Oh please," she laughed. "We both know why we broke up."

"Yeah, so you could get with my best friend." I teased.

She frowned in a joking manner. "We were plutonic. Come on now."

I smiled, and took her hand in mine. "I'll always love you though."

"And I'll love you."

"I'm glad we could have that moment," I laughed before I picked her up off the ledge and carried her into the kitchen. She giggled as I set her down on a bar stool and pulled a couple pans out to make breakfast. "What would you like to eat before I go to school?"

"Why are you still there?" Charlotte murmured, looking down at the counter. "You are capable of so much…"

I sighed and placed the pans on the stove before leaning forward with my back to her. "I don't want that speech Char."

"Why do you shut me out?" she asked in response. I didn't want to see her face, I know she's only caring for me but I hate it.

"Damn it Charlotte! I don't need another lecture. From anyone!" I yelled as I turned around to face her. I watched her take a shaky step toward me before her arms wrapped around my neck tightly. I let out a strangled breath and held her tightly to my body. Charlotte was a calming force, so sweet and innocent. She felt so pure in my arms, sometimes I think she's an angel sent from God to me and Pete.

"There is too much drama and bullshit in your life," she murmured. "This move is supposed to make everything better, but in order for that to happen you need to let go of some of it."

"I can't do that. You know I can't," I told her, releasing her from our hug with a small smile. "Now what do you want for breakfast?"

She sighed and tucked a lock of blue hair behind her ear. "French toast and eggs."

I smiled, "I can do that."

BPOV(CDM)

Rose was the last one to get out of bed and the last one to get ready. I can't remember the last time I had seen Rosalie so plain. Of course she was still beautiful but normally, even on her bad days, she made sure she looked nothing short of perfect. Today Rose wore a black t-shirt that read Thank You for Noticing I Am Awesome, with black Adidas trackies and black Toms. She wore a touch of make up and left her flowing blonde hair down. From sitting on the bed I watched Ali, dressed in a grey Darth Vader shirt, wrap her arms around Rose's waist, pulling her close. I envied Rose in that sense, that she had Ali to comfort her, and had Jasper and knew who saved her from Royce.

I had no one. I mean, yes I had Ali and Rose but it wasn't the same. I had no one to look at me like Ali did Rose and I think that makes all the difference. No matter how many times I scrub my skin in the shower or cover my bruises with make up, when I look in the mirror I look and feel dirty. I feel ugly-inside and out. With a quiet sigh, I retreated from the bedroom to let them have their moment and headed to the kitchen. I walked down the stairs slowly, taking my time. We were in no hurry. Nothing was rushed today since we were all up early. I looked down at my black Karloff as the Mummy shirt, finding comfort in its big size, and smiled.

"What fuck do you mean?" I heard Jasper say as I approached the kitchen. He obviously wasn't talking to Esme.

"I mean what I said, she didn't tell me she was there until that day I talked to you on the phone. A lot of shit went down…" Peter responded.

I debated if I go somewhere else but I was thirsty and a little curious so I walked into the kitchen. Peter and Jasper looked at me for a second as I froze in the entrance.

"I'm just grabbing a drink," I told them. "Sorry I didn't mean to interrupt you."

Peter smiled. "It's not a prob Birdy. How are you on this fine morning?"

"Tired," I responded as I reached the fridge. "You?"

"I'm pretty good thanks." He responded.

"Do you want breakfast Bella?" Jasper asked as I grabbed a glass of orange juice.

"No, I'm fine thanks. I don't eat in the mornings."

Jasper nodded and leaned against the counter nearest him. I stood there awkwardly for a moment before pointing behind me. "I can leave…"

"No, please. Come sit down if you want. Jasper and I were just talking about a few things back home. It's no biggy." Peter told me.

I hesitantly came over and sat next to him on one of the bar stools. He's not going to hurt you, I reminded myself as I felt my hands begin to shake. I looked over at Peter and noticed a tattoo on his left forearm.

"I shall be telling this with a sigh, somewhere ages and ages hence: Two roads diverged in a wood, and I - I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference," I quoted Robert Frost's poem as I read his tattoo which was in a typewriter font starting the quote with two roads diverged. I loved this small simple poem, it was one of my favorites because of the simplicity and deep meaning. "I like your tattoo. That's one of my favorite poems."

I saw Jasper and Peter exchange a smile, "Thanks, I find it quite inspirational and thought I might as well have a permanent reminder of how I want to live my life so I had it tattooed where I can see it."

I smiled a little and reached up to pull my hair back to show behind my ear. "It's pretty lame but I have three music notes behind my ear that my mom let me get on my sixteenth birthday. It's nothing compared to yours or Jasper's though."

"I'll be damned! Did you know?" Peter laughed as he asked Jasper.

Jasper looked at me with a smile. "Not a clue. I think it's cool Bella. I know music is important you, and it's not about comparing them, it's about the meaning it holds to you."

I smiled and blushed slightly, "Thanks."

Then I finished my orange juice and looked between them awkwardly. "I'm going to go check on Rose and Ali… I'll see you guys in a bit."

Please don't be fighting when I get into the room.

JPOV(CDM)

Peter let out a low whistle. "She is just full of surprises, isn't she?"

I nodded quietly to him before responding. "She definitely is. She's the sweetest girl you'll ever meet, she didn't deserve it. She didn't."

"She stayed in the room with us, didn't she? That's progress, I mean I'm a stranger."

"You didn't see her shaking?" I asked him. "I don't even think she noticed how much she was shaking. She's ready for someone to snatch her. Every sound she jumps at and if she feels someone in the hallway come up behind her to walked past her she panics."

"Fucking bastard. I hope he burns in hell. At least she is making progress though. She's trying."

"Yeah, at least. I think she's catching on. She gives me looks sometimes when I say things, like she can remember my voice or something." I told him, my hands clutching the kitchen counter.

"You're not Emmett and Bella isn't Rose. You are all separate people, nothing is the same situation." Peter told me.

"You don't know that. She's fragile. Rose is fragile and having Emmett around makes her break." I said with a heavy sigh.

"We will all work through it... Random question, where can Char and I go for something nice for Esme? Is there a fucking mall around this shit hole?"

I laughed, "Port Angeles is the closest to civilization, but Esme doesn't want your gifts Peter."

"We want to, Jesus Jasper stop trying to stifle me!"

I laughed and then looked at the clock, "I better go. I'll see you later."

I grabbed my black jacket and threw it on over my black Sucker Punch shirt before walking out of the kitchen. Peter went back upstairs to Charlotte because she went back to sleep and I watched the girls come down but something was different about them. The air felt heavier than usual and this wasn't just because of Rose's nightmares last night. Bella was biting her lip and running her fingers through a strand of hair while Rose and Ali maintained a big distance between each other as they retrieved their school things. What the fuck is going on?

APOV (SCC)

*A few minutes previous*

I pulled Rose close to me, wrapping my arms around her in an embrace.

"Are you sure you're okay, baby? I'm worried about you..." I trailed off. We hadn't talked all morning about last night's issues when we were getting ready, and as much as I wanted to move forward, I wasn't about to ignore the whole subject. I needed to be there for Rose, as horrible as I felt about it all.

"I'm fine." She snapped. She stepped farther away from the bed where I was sitting, and I had to drop my arms so that she didn't pull me away with her.

"Whoa, killer. Don't be like that with me, I'm trying to talk to you, baby." I said, standing up so that she had to look me in the eyes.

"Well, it would be gladly appreciated if you just left it alone." She stepped farther away from me, and I couldn't help being hurt by her actions and words. She didn't even want to fucking be around me anymore, and I was just trying to talk to her. It seems like that didn't happen often anymore, hell, it never happened.

"Is that what you want me to do, Rose? You want me to just leave it? Just leave you be like this? When I know it has made you this upset? Yeah, great idea. Seems like that's working well so far this morning." I stated, now getting pissed off.

"I told you I don't want to fucking talk about it, dammit." Rose said bitterly. She casted me a glare which sent me over the edge. I'm so done with this. That's when I blew up, I'd had enough.

"You don't want to fucking talk about anything, do you?" I yelled, looking her straight in the face.

"That's not true," She argued weakly, knowing what I said was very true.

"Fuck yeah, it is! What world are you living in? You always want me to "drop it", to "leave it", to "let you be", that it is "no big deal". Well you know what, Rosalie? I've had it. I bite my tongue, but I feel like I don't even fucking know you anymore, there's so much you don't tell me." I yelled, finally getting the point across that I had been thinking about for weeks now.

"How can you say that? I tell you like everything." She snapped back.

"Oh yeah? Denial isn't just a river in Egypt, Rose. What about Jasper? Can you explain that whole story? Because I think there needs to be some filling in somewhere here. You barely even mentioned him when we got together, and then he comes and you're all close and comfortable-"

Rose cut me off, "Don't you drag Jasper into this! He is innocent and has nothing to do with our problems. Jasper has been great the whole time he has been here, and the last thing I want is involving him in this discussion. And you don't tell me everything either, Ali."

"Yeah, but that's a lot different! I'm your girlfriend, for fuck's sake, and you can't even talk me about last night! Or Emmett or Jasper! What are with these secrets? You used to talk to me about everything, now I feel like I don't know anything!" I shouted, careful not to attract attention of the whole house.

"There are some things I don't feel like discussing, you should respect that." She said simply, clearly wanting to be done with this conversation for now.

"Rose, why are you shutting me out?" Just then Bella walked in the room, looking startled from the tone and pitch of our voices. She stood there only for a second before seeing my facial expression and walking out of the room as quickly as she did come in.

"I'm not shutting you out. I just don't want to talk about some stuff, like I said."

"Whatever, Rosalie. I'm not blind. I can tell you keep things from me. And you know exactly what I mean when I say that, there shouldn't have to be further explaining." I replied to her stupid comment, following Bella's footsteps out the room and down the stairs, hearing Rose come down shortly behind me.

Great, this is really fucking great. I grabbed my bag off the kitchen table in silence, and turned towards the door. I saw Jasper's WTF face and chose to ignore it, not feeling in the mood to explain anything. I was pissed off enough already, the last thing I needed was a reenactment of the whole fucking thing. I walked outside to the car, the chilly air stinging my face. It felt good to be out of the house for a minute, everything inside felt stifling. Like a bomb, things were about to explode, I could feel the pressure. The door closed in the background behind my thoughts, pulling me into reality.

The car ride to school was silent, as we all knew better than to try and start a conversation. I looked back and Bella was biting her fingernail, looking out the window, and Jasper just sat quietly next to her, playing with a hem on the knee of his jeans. Rose sat next to me, and even though her arm could almost touch mine, it felt like she was a million miles away from me. I pulled into the parking lot after what seemed like hours but was only minutes. Everyone got out of the car, and Bella handed me my bag from the back.

"Thanks," I forced out a smile, reaching my hand out to her to grab it. Bella just smiled back understandingly. That was the thing about her that I loved, she never pushed anything. We all went to our separate classes, until I saw them all again for lunch. The day ticked by so slow, and I wondered what would happen between Rose and I. We had been together for four fucking years. Maybe I shouldn't have said anything. But then again, I've been holding this back for weeks. She deserves to know how I feel and I deserve to tell her. I'm sick of this shit, and it was about time it came out. I wish she could see it and understand how I feel about this, it's like she was in denial or something. I feel bad Bella had to walk into that though, I can't imagine how nervous that made her. It was just Rose and I, but any kind of yelling and shouting makes her uncomfortable.

I pondered back and forth in my head, never resting my thoughts. The first and second period of the day went by fast, as I was too tired and drained from last night and this morning to think. The more awake I got as the day went on, the more I thought, and the more I watched the clock tick by. Please, just let me make it to lunch, then at least I can be with people who understand why I'm so bitchy today.

As if my prayers had been answered, the bell rang, and soon the sound of people jumping up and grabbing their stuff to leave filled the room and the hallway. I went to my locker first to drop my books off and grab the rest I needed for the afternoon, before walking alone to the lunchroom to our usual table. Rose sat with her lunch untouched, and Jasper and Bella weren't there yet. I sat down next to her, looking down. It was an uncomfortable silence, but neither of us were moving to another table alone.

"Hi," Rose said quietly, rolling an apple around in her hand.

"Hey." I replied.

"Look, I need to talk to you." Rose stated, setting the apple down on the table.

"Fine, better make it quick, I don't want Bella hearing any of this. It upsets her." I said, looking at her sternly.

"Ali... I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have gotten mad at you for that." She started, "I've been thinking about it all morning, and I don't want to do that to you. I don't mean to, it's not like I have stuff to hide from you, I just don't want to talk about some stuff. But I can change, Alice. I can change that." I looked at Rose, wondering where this all came form. This was the last thing I was expecting to happen at the lunch table, Rose wasn't usually one for apologizing and everything.

"Okay..." I trailed off, not sure what to say. She really caught me off guard.

"I really messed up, I know. I don't mean to leave you out like that, it's just hard for me to talk about some things. But I can get better with it, I promise, Ali. I just need some time."

"And how am I supposed to believe you? You do know you were out of line, don't you? I was just trying to help you, Rose." I said, the anger from this morning coming back out.

"I know, and I'm really sorry about that Alice. But really? When do I ever apologize? Never. So you know I'm not just bullshitting you. I really feel bad about this, and I wish I could go back and change it, but I can't. So instead, I'm trying to move forward and fix things. I don't want to lose you." She said sincerely, a small smile on her face.

I sat there for a minute, thinking about the words she had just said, before Bella and Jasper came up to the table.

"Hey guys," Bella said quietly, while Jasper sat down next to Rose and Bella did next to me.

"How are you, Rose?" Jasper asked, looking worried for a minute.

"I'm fine, thanks." Rose smiled reassuringly, before Jasper opened a bottle of water and look a long sip.

"You sure?" He asked again.

"Yes, I'm sure." She responded, looking over at me.

"Good," Jasper smiled after swallowing, "Man, I thought today would never end. Class just dragged. And I really need a smoke."

"I agree. With the classes dragging at least." I pitched in, taking a bite of the sandwich in front of me, and earned a smile from Jasper.

We sat around and talked at the table like normal, and Jasper and Bella both seemed confused as to what happened since Rose and I went from not talking to being more of our normal selves. I wasn't sure how to respond to her, but the more I thought about it, I should just forgive her. I know she doesn't mean to do what she did, and if she says that she'll work on it, then that's good enough for me.

"It's been a long day, but when we get home there's some stuff I have to do." Rose pointed out.

"Okay, like what?" Jasper asked, leaning his elbows on the table.

"I have to clean since Emmett is coming Saturday, and I won't have time to do it tomorrow, and of course I want everything to be ready when he gets here. I guess homework will have to wait." She sighed. I looked over at Jasper, expecting to see an understanding face, when I actually saw the opposite. He bit his lip, obviously holding back anger, but Rose didn't seem to notice.

"We can all help," Bella chimed in, smiling.

"Sounds good," Rose said, getting up. The bell had just rung, and as much as I had wished for lunch to come, I wished for the school day to be over with.

Thanks for reading! Please let me know what is going on in your head...You don't know how much it means to me (us), and I'll promise to get the next chapter up sooner if you do ;) (a little bribing never hurts anyone).