AN: I sed stup flaming Nope! ok ebony's name is ENOBY Nice to meet you, Enoby. nut mary su OK! Suuure she's not Mary Sue. DRACO IS SOO IN LUV wif her dat he is acting defrent! Of course. They just met, what, a few hours ago? Romeo and Juliet much? dey nu eechodder b4 ok! Okay, whatever you say.
"DRACO!" I shouted. "What the fuck do you think you are doing?" Jeez, he was just taking the scenic route. Calm your tits.
Draco didn't answer but he stopped the flying car and he walked out of it. And then he died because he just stepped out of a flying car. I walked out of it too, curiously. Hmm. How curious. My new boyfriend just fell to his death so I'm going to go investigate!
"What the fucking hell?" I asked angrily. Damn, you're still alive.
"Ebony?" I thought your name was Enoby now. he asked.
"What?" I snapped.
Draco leaned in extra-close and I looked into his gothic red eyes (he was wearing color contacts) Why? He's a wizard, he can just use a glamour charm! which revealed so much depressing sorrow and evilness and then suddenly I didn't feel mad anymore. What? This doesn't even make sense! Why would depressing sorrow and evilness make you not mad anymore?
And then... suddenly just as I Draco kissed me passionately. Oh, God. Draco climbed on top of me and we started to make out keenly against a tree. No, please stop. He took of my top and I took of his clothes. Please, I may throw up. I even took of my bra. I'm begging you! Then he put his thingie into my you-know-what and we did it for the first time. Well, there goes my lunch.
"Oh! Oh! Oh! " I screamed. I was beginning to get an orgasm. Wow, because that was the most hard-core porn I've ever seen. We started to kiss everywhere and my pale body became all warm. Um, you're a vampire. No warmth for you. And then... Drum roll, please.
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING YOU MOTHERFUKERS!"
It was... Another drum roll please. Dumbledore! What? Okay, Dumbledore is WAY out of character!