Chap #18, how about that! :) So frustrating, I have a couple of good chapters lined up, but have to get through all these BORING ones first! Argh... :P Anyway, I at least hope that YOU guys like it...maybe I should stop putting myself down so much? :D THANKYOU for all the great reviews I've gotten, even the critical ones - I can't improve unless I know what I'm doing wrong! I forgot to say last chapter - we finally reached ONE HUNDRED reviews! Whooo...next goal 250? Haha :) xxxxxxxxxxxxx

'Keep Calm And Carry On'

About twenty minutes later Claire walked out of Common Grounds, feeling a little odd. She'd been talking with Oliver for the first ten of those minutes, then the conversation had run dry and he'd begun to get irritated, so she bought a coffee and drank it as quickly as she could without seeming too rude.

Oliver hadn't really helped enlighten her as to her feelings for Myrnin. He seemed to think the whole thing was ridiculous, but he did stick to his word that Myrnin was apparently 'in love' with her. Although when Claire pressed for details, he had revealed that Myrnin himself hadn't actually said that, Oliver had just 'deduced' it. Claire felt unexpectedly disappointed, though she wouldn't admit it.

She walked down the road in contemplative silence, and eventually gave up trying to sort out the mess of emotions and thoughts that were rolling around in her head. She decided just to ignore Myrnin as best as possible and hope that he would just go away. Unlikely.

Claire got home at about noon. She hadn't realised just how slowly she had been walking.

She fished in her pocket for her keys and found them tangled in a loosed thread. The lock opened with a metallic click and she pushed the door open after plastering a bright smile on her face. Claire thumped down the hall as noisily as possible.

Shane was sprawled on the couch, killing things on his game. He didn't acknowledge her when she greeted him, and she felt her heart sinking as her smile faltered.

Claire went upstairs silently and spent the remainder of the day locked in her room, crying and listening to depressing music. She didn't bother going down for dinner, knowing that she wouldn't be able to face being ignored.

It was still fairly early when she decided to go to bed for lack of anything else to do. She took a quick shower and pulled on her pyjamas, climbing into bed and curling into a ball under the duvet.

After a long hour, Claire finally drifted into sleep.

In the morning, Claire woke feeling empty. She hadn't realised just how much having the whole Glass house pissed at her would affect her until she realised she didn't actually have any other friends. She bit her lip. Except Myrnin.

Claire sighed and rolled out of bed. She twisted her hair up in a loose braid, and made her way downstairs. She knew she was just going through the motions, not really taking any of it in.

Eve passed her on the stairs and Claire felt the temperature drop a few degrees as she went past, the house reacting to Eve's mood.

"Thanks." Claire muttered. "You too?" She asked the house, feeling slightly stupid. The house instantly turned warm and comforting, and Claire sighed in actual relief. At least some...thing wasn't angry or upset with her.

She ate her cereal in depressed contemplation and washed up mindlessly. Then she went back upstairs and dressed slowly, putting off the time when she would have to decide what to do with her day.

Apparently that decision was already made for her, as she felt the tug of a portal opening upstairs and a minute later Amelie entered her room. She seemed anxious, and looked around the room quickly before turning to Claire.

"Have you seen Myrnin?" She asked in an urgent voice.

"Uh...No?" Claire stammered, still getting used to the fact that Amelie was suddenly in her room. "Why, what happened?"

Amelie turned and spoke sharply with one of her guards, who nodded curtly and headed back down the hall.

"That is what I am trying to find out." Amelie said, in reply to Claire's question. Claire got the distinct feeling that Amelie was withholding information from her. She supposed she should be used to it, by now.

"Well, is he OK? Where is he?" Claire asked worriedly, absentmindedly nibbling her lip again.

"I don't know." Amelie said, sounding frustrated and irritated. Not a good combination. She stood up. "Call me immediately if you see him, Claire."

Claire just nodded as Amelie left the room.

What was that about?

Claire had thought that Myrnin was allowed to leave the lab, juts not Morganville. Clearly Amelie was keeping a tighter leash on him then Claire had realised. Or she was trying to, anyway.

She pulled on some shoes and headed for the door, intending to walk to Myrnin's lab and see if he was there. Knowing him, he'd probably be hiding in a corner somewhere, giggling to himself while everyone went berserk looking for him. But Claire stopped at the top of the stairs, and changed course for Amelie's secret room instead. Once inside she climbed the stairs and immediately opened a portal to Myrnin's lab.

Sure enough, he was sitting quite calmly in his favourite chair, spectacles perched on the end of his nose. He glanced at her over the top of the book was he was reading upside down as she steeped into the lab. She tilted her head to the side curiously and had to laugh when she saw what he was reading.

Bram Stoker's Dracula. Typical Myrnin, really.

"Hey, Myrnin." She said cheerfully. She felt a lot happier since she had steeped into the lab and caught sight of Myrnin.

"Hello, Claire." Came his murmured reply. He appeared to be engrossed in the book, even though he was holding it upside-down. She rolled her eyes and plonked herself down on the couch opposite him, pulling her knees up to her chest.

"Everyone's looking for you."

He looked up in surprise, brushing dark curls out of his eyes.

"Everyone?"

"Well, Amelie. She thinks you've committed suicide or something, with the way she was acting." Claire joked. Myrnin's expression twisted and he slammed the book closed with a loud snap, squeezing his eyes shut. He shook himself suddenly and moaned quietly, clamping his arms around his chest.

Claire stood up in alarm.

Myrnin slid to the floor, still clutching his chest, and shuddered violently. Claire rushed over and knelt beside him, making calming noises. She was no expert, and she didn't even know if vampire could have them, but it looked like he was having a panic attack. He was hyperventilating and whimpering, whispering,

"No, no. Please make it stop. Make it stop!" He begged, his eyes rolling back into his skull. Then he surprised Claire by saying her name amidst his ramblings. "Claire. Claire, help me! Please. Please..." He was now gazing in terror at some imagined threat. His voice broke on the last word and he whimpered again, a tear leaking from his eye and running into his hairline. Claire stroked the drop away from his face, and brushed his hair off his forehead. Her heart was pounding in her chest, and she almost cried herself. She couldn't stand to see him so scared, even if there was no danger. She made whispered hushing noises and he seemed to calm down a little.

His breathing evened out and he pressed his face into her palm, still whimpering and begging quietly. Her heart broke for him, lying on the floor like a child, and she wrapped her amrs around his upper body, holding him still. She whispered calming words in his ear and rocked him gently, letting her instincts tell her what to do. Slowly the convulsions stopped, and Myrnin lapsed into silence, though she could still hear his frantic, deep breaths, and feel the tension in his muscles. She eased him into an upright position, and without thinking about what she was doing, she ran her hands along his shoulders, rubbing the tight muscles to loosen them. She slid her hands over his shoulders and onto his chest, massaging across it. It felt smooth and hard underneath his thin shirt.

Claire moved her hands back up to Myrnin's neck and massaged circles there with her thumbs. She felt him relax slightly, and his breathing returned to its normal rate.

His legs had been twisted round on the floor and they stretched out as he leant back, relaxing against her. Claire sat completely still, and waited.

She felt him stiffen suddenly, and saw him sniff the air before turning round, dark eyes wide in his pretty face.

"Claire?"

She smiled a little sheepishly.

"Uh...You were having a panic attack or something. I was trying to help." Claire looked away, blushing. "I'm sorry." She pulled away and slid backwards, giving Myrnin some space.

He twisted round and crossed his ankles before leaning back on his fists, sighing.

"I-I didn't mean for you to have to see that." He said quietly. "I have quite a strong...dislike of straight jackets." His mouth twisted up into what couldn't really be called a smile.

Claire looked around, confused, at the obvious lack of any such thing in the room.

"Amelie...sedated me and I - woke up strapped into one." Myrnin said, not meeting her eyes. He was trying to act nonchalant, but she could see it was affecting him.

"Why would she do that?" Claire whispered, appalled.

Myrnin looked at her steadily. "Because she thinks I am suicidal."

Claire know whether to laugh or take him seriously. He watched her, gauging her reaction.

"Are you?" She asked finally. It was supposed to be a joke, so she gasped when Myrnin just shrugged.

"Why, Myrnin?"

"That's for me and my psychiatrist to know, and you to never find out." Myrnin said, attempting a mischievous grin. It didn't work, and he fell silent again. Claire looked at him, and felt another emotion surface other than the pity she was already feeling. She tried to ignore it.

"Well, um, if you ever, y'know, wanted anyone to talk to..." She mumbled, unsure what she should say. She expected Myrnin to laugh but he fixed her with a steady gaze.

"Thankyou for the offer, Claire." He said, straight-faced.

She shrugged awkwardly.

"Why was Amelie looking for you if you're right here?" Claire asked after a minute or two.

"Because I wasn't here earlier."

"Oh." Said Claire, then remembered something. "I was supposed to call her as soon as I saw you."

"But you haven't."

"No."

"Why not?" Myrnin asked curiously, gazing at her with fathomless dark eyes.

She shrugged again. Awkward.

"Well you did just have a massive panic attack." She said after a while. Myrnin blinked slowly, then stood up suddenly, picking his book up from the floor.

"I wasn't really reading this." He told her.

Claire didn't say anything. She just frowned, and stood up too.

"I was waiting for you." Myrnin continued. "I hoped you might come to look for me."

Okay, that's creepy.

"Oh." That was all she could think of.

"No-one else would bother. But you...are the first friend I have had in a long time." Myrnin said sadly. His voice changed when he said 'friend'. He hesitated, as if he were unsure whether or not she would want him to call her that.

"I'm sure you must have other friends, Myrnin." Claire said awkwardly, trying to change the subject to anything other than herself. She wasn't sure she liked this Myrnin. What was it Bishop had said? That Myrnin uses the truth like a club. She was beginning to understand what he meant. At times - like this - Myrnin could be too blunt, too truthful, although normally she would appreciate his honesty.

Myrnin didn't reply, he just watched her from under his lashes. Claire felt tension start to build around them again. When had he gotten so close?

No, I won't let it happen again. She thought fiercely. She looked around for an escape. Her eyes fell on the book in Myrnin's hand.

"So um, do you like Dracula?"

Myrnin looked a bit thrown. "What?" He said distractedly, looking at her lips.

"The book!" Claire cried, gesturing wildly at the small rectangle. Myrnin glanced down at it, then back up again.

"Yes, I find it rather amusing..." He replied, tilting his head to the side slightly.

Claire fidgeted under his gaze, looking down at her feet. When she looked up to find him a few inches away from her face, she didn't even flinch.

You need some new tricks, Myrnin.

She tried to drop her gaze again, but then his fingers were under her chin, forcing her to look up at him. Claire's breath caught in the back of her throat, and her heart rate picked up a little. She saw his lips curve up slightly as he no doubt heard her reaction to his touch and proximity.

Claire physically shook her head and stepped to the side.

I refuse to let myself get into a 'situation' here.

She walked a few paces away,, trying to control her breathing.

"I should phone Amelie and let her know where you are. Unless you want to do it?"

"Yes, yes, I shall do it." Myrnin murmured. She saw his hand clench into a fist then slowly uncurl again, and decided it was time to go.

"Right. So I guess I should leave, then. Unless there was something you wanted me for?"

Myrnin paused, and Claire began to regret asking such an open-ended question, but he merely shook his head, a small smile playing across his lips.

On impulse, Claire wrapped him in a brief hug as she passed. It probably shocked her as much as it shocked him; at first Myrnin tensed, but after a second he relaxed and squeezed her back. Claire stepped away from him feeling a little giddy, and left quickly, feeling his eyes on the back of her head as she went.

Okay, me hope you likey! Please review to let me know what you thought, I am but a humble writer grovelling at the feet of my readers! Thankyooooooo! :) xxx Oh and my space bar is kinda broken -I have to tap it twice for every one space - so let me know if I've missed out any space anywhere! Hehe xx