Chapter Twenty-Three

Ok, so I really hoped to have this all done by Christmas, but I have a sinking feeling that I won't. If that is the case, any updates after that wouldn't be for a LONG time. It's unavoidable, I fear. Thanks for the continuing support. I hope that the route I'm taking doesn't disappoint, but honestly, I like the idea.

Disclaimer: I don't own Criminal Minds (dang).

"Start from the beginning, Morgan. What happened when you got home?" Hotch's voice was not condescending in the least. He needed to find out exactly what fueled Derek's temporary break from sanity.

"I got home just as soon as I could after we landed in Quantico. The house was dark and in disarray. Penelope was gone, as were her possessions. I found a positive pregnancy test on the floor in the bathroom. The only possible father of the child would be Kevin Lynch." Derek's voice was a robotic monotone, free of emotion. He was a hollow man now, a mere shell of the man who used to have it all but now had nothing.

"Why would she leave?" Hotch questioned. His fingers drummed against the wooden table, mere inches from the tape recorder that was documenting every word. "We need to have an account of your theories to make absolutely sure that you weren't responsible in any way for her disappearance."

"Why the hell would I abduct the woman I love? What kind of dumbass would think that?" Sudden anger glinted in Derek's eyes.

"I know you didn't hurt her. But not everyone does. So….why do you think she left?" For a moment, there was silence, a thick, foggy, silence that reverberated around the whole room.

"I don't have to think. I know. She was suffering from PTSD way before she found out she was pregnant. She had nightmares, was withdrawn, depressed, drank herself senseless one time. I seriously thought she was going to be okay. I believe she was getting a little better-until she found out she was pregnant with the child of a rapist. It triggered a severe PTSD reaction. In her mind, she felt like she had no other option but to leave. Maybe she couldn't face me with someone else's baby growing inside her."

"Where do you think she would go?"

"If I knew that, do you think I would be sitting here speaking into some damn tape recorder? This is a waste of my time! I should be out looking for her!" Angered sweat bubbled on his forehead. He was a broken, bitter man now. The only thing that could restore him was gone, and here he was wasting his time when he could be trying to get her back!

"She could've gone back underground, like she was before she was employed by the FBI. She probably has connections that we don't know about," Hotch conjectured. That, in Derek's opinion, made it look like Penelope was involved in something illegal now. She wouldn't be…she just wouldn't revert back to her old lifestyle…would she? Well….after all…..she HAD snapped…

He shook his head silently. He had to believe the best about her. She wouldn't, not even in a somewhat delusional state, do anything like that again. The woman that he loved and treasured more than he could comprehend simply wasn't capable of that anymore.

"So where do we start?"

"We put her picture out to the public. JJ can appeal to her via a press conference if it becomes necessary. And….we wait. No matter what we do, she won't come back until she's ready. You need to prepare yourself for the possibility that she might not come back…for a long time." Hotch decided to leave out the word "forever"-and Derek knew it.

"She'll come back. She can't just leave me like this." Even as he spoke the words…he had his doubts.

Meanwhile…

A tear-streaked woman had been found at a hospital. No ID. She had simply wandered into the building and had collapsed suddenly as she walked up to the desk. No one knew who she was or where she had come from. She was nameless, faceless.

When she awoke, doctors became aware of her mental state. They sent her to the psychiatric ward. She hadn't objected…nor had she coughed up name.

It was as if she hadn't existed anywhere in the world until then. And if she had…she had turned her back on her life and had settled for a meaningless existence. She had no memories of her past, no one to call a family member or friend. No name.

She didn't even have a French passport on her.