Warning: This story deals with domestic violence and the struggles to recover. If you have problems with this issue please don't read this.
Disclaimer: Ms Meyers owns Twilight and all its characters.
Big thanks to my Beta's Taloolah, dizzygirl28 and Beate73. You girls are awesome, I appreciate all the work you do for me, helping me make my stuff presentable. Love you guys.
Thanks to my prereader's VanPireNZ and tjbaby101 for your input, you rock.
Okay on with the story.
Small Steps Large Leaps
Jacobs POV
I was completely frozen in my spot when I saw Edward walk through the doors. Why did he have to choose that moment to come visit us at work? I watched as his eyes met Sam's, and I saw his beautiful green eyes change from happiness to fear. He dropped the basket he was carrying and food spilled out around him as his beautiful face drained of all its colour.
Sam screamed out his name when he saw him and lunged forward just as Edward collapsed. I had him in my arms before I even recognised I actually moved, and scooped him up before carrying him out the doors with Jasper and Sam hot on my heels.
Sam spewed his verbal assault against Jasper and me as he tried to baby talk to Edward, which only caused Edward to puke everywhere. We were both covered in it. It was in his hair, down the side of his shirt and face, as well as mine, and it was all I could do not to follow in his footsteps and lose the contents of my stomach. You know you really love someone when they can puke all over you and you don't fucking care.
When Edward whispered he was 'home' and clung to me, my heart swelled and I squeezed him tighter, but the moment was destroyed as Sam lunged at us. I spun around quickly; I wasn't thinking about myself at that moment, the only thought in my head was protect Edward. The fact that he was in my arms and I had no way to defend us - other than to take the brunt of Sam's blows - was not lost on me, and I would gladly take all of it to save Edward.
All I really wanted to do was put Edward down and beat Sam into the ground. That thought surged through me and almost consumed me. If Edward hadn't needed me so much at that point in time, I don't think there would have been any force in nature that could have stopped me from killing that mother fucker. My body was shaking with the urge – burning through my veins like a wild fire - but one thing was much more important, much more prevalent. Protecting Edward.
When Sam hit Jasper, he walked right into a one way ticket to a night in jail, but I knew he would be out by morning. It was no surprise when Jasper told Edward that Sam would be released, and that it would take months for this to hit the courts.
When I arrived at Edward's place with him in my arms, Alice was already there. He had passed out from exhaustion and shock as I was carrying him to the car. I had hoped that Edward would wake up on his own and that I wouldn't have to take him to the hospital again. I walked over to the couch and gently laid Edward down, covering him with the blanket that was thrown over the back of it.
Alice was a nervous wreck. The last time I saw her this worked up was when Edward was in the hospital, after they had discovered that Sam was my cousin. Smiling at me tentativly, Alice handed me a set of clothing that clearly belonged to Emmett. Apparently he'd left them at her place after his last visit and she thought they would fit me better than Jasper's clothes.
"Jacob, what the hell are we going to do now? I can't believe that fucker found him." I had to suppress a chuckle at, not only Alice's tone, but at her cursing. Alice very rarely swore, Jasper did it enough for both of them.
"No idea, Alice. All we can do now is keep a close eye on him and make sure he is with either me or Jasper at all times. Alice, you will have to be with someone, too; it's a known fact that abusers go after family to get to their obsession. We have to keep you safe as well." Alice sighed and sprung at me, effectively pinning me to the wall with my arm raised up behind my back. The strain of it caused me to wince.
"I think I can take care of myself, Jake. Jasper taught me well, wouldn't you say?" I swiftly reversed our positions, and with gentle force, pinned her in return.
"I'm sure he did Alice, but you can never be too careful." I smiled down at her and chuckled at the look of awe on her face.
"God damn it, Jake, it's not the same; Sam doesn't have police training." I released her and sighed.
"No, he doesn't, but he is still dangerous and will do anything to get to Edward, including using you as bait. Please, Alice, for Edward's sake, just go along with me," I pleaded.
"Fine, fine. I will be a good little solider and do as I'm told, but remember Black; I'm doing this under duress and only for Edward," she huffed out.
"Sure, sure. Now do me a favour and give Edward a sponge bath, would ya? I would hate for him to wake up covered in puke." Alice shook her head.
"Oh, hell no, I ain't doing that. Edward made it perfectly clear that I was not to see him without a shirt on, let alone naked. You're on your own, Jake." She smirked at me before heading for the door. "I will be back in a bit. I have to run some quick errands, so have fun." And with that she was out the door.
Well fuck. The thought of giving Edward a sponge bath made my heart clench and my dick twitch. Now there were two opposing forces of nature. Just the thought of seeing him naked thrilled me, but God help me, the thought of how he was going to react when he found out it was me that washed him down - it could set our relationship back to the very beginning, and that thought terrified me.
I sighed softly to myself as I gazed at Edward, who was lying on the couch where I had placed him earlier. I turned and left the room to find what I needed and set about cleaning myself up and changing, before I set some towels on his bed and grabbed a wash basin, cloth and soap. Lovingly, I stripped him down to his boxer shorts and washed his hair gently, before cleaning off his body. It was when I turned him slightly that I saw the mark. Along with all the scars his body held - which were faded, but many - he had a tattoo of Sam's name just below his boxer line. I noticed the black ink poking out the top of his boxers, which had slid down slightly from moving him, and I was curious what kind of tattoo he would have. Turned out I shouldn't have looked. The writing was crooked and looked like a child had taken a magic marker to his body.
That was when I rushed to the bathroom myself and finally expelled the contents of my stomach. I wondered how this had happened, and what exactly Edward had gone through when he received this branding. Because that's exactly what it was; someone marking their territory. My heart ached for him.
I washed my mouth out and ran back to his side. I finished washing him and dressed him in pajamas, and then I moved him to the other side of the bed so I could remove the towels I had laid underneath him and tucked him in. The reality of washing Edward was ten times worse than I had imagined, and it wasn't until I was done that I realized I was crying.
It was three in the afternoon as I closed his bedroom door, after cleaning up the mess, and started to pace. Sam was back, he knew Edward was in town and he knew Jasper and I were attached to him. I scrubbed my hands roughly over my face and blew out a harsh breath. This was a fucking nightmare.
Walking around the house, I checked the locks on the windows and door to make sure they were secure. It seemed Edward was pretty serious about his protection, his locks where all top of the line, though getting him an alarm system would be on my to-do list. I also knew that either Jasper or myself would have to be with him twenty four seven till we got Sam out of the way. The idea of being with Edward so much both thrilled and saddened me. I was thrilled at the thought of being around him constantly, but I knew that it would be something that Edward couldn't deal with just yet. We were only just starting to get to know each other, and even though he felt comfortable enough around me to touch me, could he deal with being alone with me in his apartment?
My anxiety was through the roof at the thought of him waking up to just him and I, alone in his place. He had suffered enough trauma today and I didn't think he could handle anymore.
The sound of him calling out for Jasper woke me from my reverie, and I sighed, raking my hands through my hair, pulling slightly at the still damp strands. I took a much needed deep breath and retrieved a glass of water and some pain medication from the kitchen cupboard. I knew where things were from checking out the place while he was sleeping. I tapped lightly on the door and entered. The look on his face was what surprised me the most; he looked almost happy to see me.
When he asked about his clothing and mine, I knew I was blushing as I stumbled over my explanation, expecting him to lose it completely. Instead, he surprised me again by saying thank you and walking over to me to take the water and medication. A strange look passed over his face as he started to shake and dropped the glass of water onto the floor causing it to shatter.
I started asking if I should leave, if he was okay, and before I knew it, he was attached to me, his arms secured tightly around my waist, begging me to stay. My heart pounded fiercely in my chest as the first genuine smile all afternoon made its way onto my lips. I told him I would stay as long as he needed me, and whispered that I would give my life for him. Maybe I didn't whisper too well because his breathing hitched and his grip tightened on me.
After making a joke about getting out of his bedroom because, really, having him standing in front of me half naked was doing nothing for Jacob junior , he asked about Sam. Just then, Jasper walked through the door, looking utterly exhausted and ready to kill.
The conversation led to how we were going to protect Edward, and a part of me swelled with pride when Edward brought up the fact that Alice would need to be kept safe too. It was the conversation about the photos, that followed, that had Edward on edge, and when he asked me if I had seen them and I nodded, all of the colour drained from his face. I could see by the look on his face that he was withdrawing into himself; I was going to lose him if I didn't act swiftly. The problem was, how do you convince someone that they are worthy of being happy and loved? Edward's eyes looked dead when he left the room, he was so fucking broken in that moment, worse than I had ever seen him before, but what I was seeing matched the description of what Jasper had told me Edward looked like in the beginning, when he'd first found him and the months that followed.
I looked at Jasper and saw pain and sorrow reflected in his eyes as a single tear ran down his cheek, before he scrubbed at his face angrily. "What the fuck are we gonna do, Jake? I can't bear the thought of Sam getting his hands on Edward again; it would kill me if anything happened to him. Oh God, Jake, Alice would be inconsolable if..." He cut himself off with a loud sigh and dropped his head into his hands.
"Jasper, we will fix this. Between the two of us we can keep him safe, we just have to be vigilant. I can't...I won't...not now Jasper, I just found him." My shoulders slumped forward as the weight of it all pushed down on me. Jasper stood and walked over to me, placing a hand on my shoulder and squeezing gently, I was always amazed at how his touch alone could comfort and calm. He had a gift.
"You're right, Jake, we will figure this out, but for now I'm going to check on Edward." He released me and made his way down the corridor to Edward's room. I heard him knock a couple of times before the door opened and closed.
I started to pace, trying to take deep breaths and figure things out in my head, when Edward's voice cut through my fog.
"Why? Why, Jasper?" He was screaming, "Why the fuck would I tell you that that monster decided it would be a good idea to tie me to a bed, violate me and then leave his mark on me?" Edward's voice was loud, angry and filled with disgust. I rushed to his room and burst through the door, my eyes falling to the tattoo on full display. I frowned and shook my head slightly before raising my eyes to meet his.
Edward quickly covered himself and dropped to the floor, a loud sob escaping him as he began to mumble. "Please, oh God, please. Now he knows how damaged I am. How could someone like that ever love me? I'm worthless..." His body rocked back and forth with the force of his cries. I made my way over to him instinctually , the only thing I could think of was to comfort the man I loved. It was true, he had my heart and I was not ashamed to admit it, too soon or not, I couldn't care less. He needed me.
I scooped him up in my arms and he clung to me, much like he had in the parking lot. His face pressed into my chest, and he threw his arms around my neck, pulling himself further into me. "Shh... Edward, it's okay, baby, I'm not going anywhere. Trust me please. You are worth it; you are so wonderful and kind, compassionate and loving. Edward, please, you don't see yourself the way I do." I took a deep breath and threw myself all in, no matter the cost. "Edward, I love you." I buried my head in his hair as his breathing calmed and his grip tightened. I turned and saw Jasper smiling down at me before he shut the door softly behind him.
Edward pulled away from me slightly, his face red and splotchy from his crying. "How can you love me, Jake?" He sounded so broken, yet I could see the hope in his eyes, the longing to be truly loved and cared for.
"I didn't have a choice Edward; you found your way into my heart and moved in." I chuckled slightly from nerves before I continued, "I know it's fast, I just...Edward, I can't explain the how's or why's very well, all I can tell you is what I feel. When I look at you I see the one person in this world that was meant for me, the one person I would lay down and die for. Nothing that has happened to you in the past is your fault, Edward, but you have to understand one thing - you are worth it, especially to me." He took a deep breath and leaned forward, his lips pressing tentatively to mine. My heart started racing in my chest as his lips grew more forceful and he tilted his head as his hands cupped my face. His tongue came out and pushed its way into my mouth, causing a sigh of contentment to leave me as I deepened the kiss. My hands ran up and down his back several times before they made their way into his soft, silky hair, and I weaved my fingers through the strands.
Edward pulled back, panting slightly before blushing and burying his head in my chest. "Say it again, Jake." I knew what he meant, as I somehow always seemed to when it came to Edward.
"I love you," I sighed softly into his hair as my hands held him to me. "We will get through this, Edward. Together."
"Promise, Jake?" he asked, pulling back from me to look into my eyes. Edward had a way of looking at you, like he could pull the truth of your words right out of your head. It was unsettling at times and made my heart stammer under his gaze.
"I promise, Edward. Always." I placed a gentle kiss on the top of his head before I added, "You and me."
There was a loud crash that came from the other room. Edward sat up and started to shake violently before we heard a sweet voice call out. "Sorry, boys, just me. I dropped a damn bag," The giggle that followed caused Edward to chuckle. "Alice," was all he said as he shook his head.
"Come on, Edward, let's get off this floor and go see what she destroyed," I said as I got up, pulling him with me. We made our way out into the kitchen, after Edward pulled on a t-shirt, and found Alice and Jasper close together, foreheads touching and talking softly.
"What did you do, Alice?" Edward said as he made his way to them, pulling me with him, my hand held tightly in his.
"I went to stock up on food and necessities for us all and decided that we would all camp out here for a while. I have board games and changes of clothes for everyone..." Jasper cut her off with a soft "fuck" before he turned to me.
"Damn, Jake, I forgot to go pick up your stuff on my way back here."
"Never mind, Jazz, I did it," Alice said as she pulled one of my duffel's from behind the counter.
"How the hell did you get into my place, Alice?" I said, rather impressed that she had managed to get through my alarm system, not to mention my deadbolts.
"Oh, that's easy. I remember the alarm code from the time you went away and I had to go water your plants, and I had a key cut, just in case," she smiled at me, her eye's dancing with amusement.
"Sneaky woman child," I scoffed, using Edward's nickname for her. She turned to look at Edward, arms crossed over her chest. Edward just smiled sheepishly and blushed under her gaze before moving to stand behind me.
He leaned in and whispered in my ear, "You're in trouble now, and I think you dragged me with you," before pulling back and chuckling. Oh shit, Alice hated that name and the only one that could call her that was Edward. He had told me about it on our walk back to the apartment from the elevator the night after our double date. He had also mentioned that I should never, under any circumstances, call her that.
"Crap, I'm sorry, Alice. I didn't mean to say that, it just slipped out." I held a look of contrition and Alice's eyes softened a little.
"You get one, Jake, and only because you mean so much to Edward and Jasper. As for you, Edward, telling people that nickname is strictly forbidden by the covenant of Alice. You know the rules and you will be punished." She started to laugh as she moved towards us, her eyes glued on Edward. He squealed, causing me to laugh, as he tried to keep himself hidden behind me.
"Oh God, Jake, don't let her get me..." His voice faded away as he stood in front of me, his arms pulling me tightly as his face buried itself into my chest yet again. I held my hand out to Alice, my face serious as I shook my head at her. His words from earlier reverberating in my head. Edward surprised me by taking a deep breath and holding his head high; although, his grip tightened on me slightly as he turned his head to look over his shoulder at Alice and Jasper. Alice had curled herself into Jasper, her lip quivering as tears ran down her face silently, Jasper whispering in her ear. Alice nodded at Jasper's words, never breaking her gaze from Edward, meeting him head on when he dropped his hands from me and turned around completely. He rested his back against my chest and pulled my arms around him, silently drawing strength from me. I smiled - despite the situation - because he wanted me.
"I'm so sorry..." Edward cut Alice off by holding his hand up and shaking his head.
"No, Alice, I'm sorry, it's just a little fresh is all, and with Sam out there, knowing that I'm near..." He shook his head slightly and leaned back into me more. "Let's just forget it happened, okay? Let's make some food and play games."
"Sounds good," Jasper said, "but how about we order in because I really don't have the energy to cook. I just wanna fall down onto the floor and relax."
We ordered in pizza and played cards for a few hours before the day really started to affect us all. Yawns were being passed around and eyes were starting to droop.
"Okay, time for bed. Where are we all sleeping?" Alice said as she pulled herself up and stretched. I turned to look at Edward, unsure of what he wanted.
"Alice and Jasper, if you are gonna stay here then take the spare room, it's already made up. Jake, I only have two bedrooms..." he broke off and looked at the floor before looking back at me, his eyes filled with determination. "You can share my room if you like?" His voice was soft, with almost a child like quality to it. Alice and Jasper both gaped in surprise before they schooled their faces back to a neutral expression.
I was looking at Edward, my own mouth agape, eyes wide in surprise; when I felt his fingers reach under my chin and close my jaw shut. "You don't have to if you don't want to..." he began, but I cut him off quickly.
"Lead the way, Edward." My voice sounded husky, even in my own ears, and I cleared my throat as Jasper laughed. Asshole. But the smile never left my face as I got up and pulled Edward with me and made my way to his bedroom, with him.
A/N Okay so this is a day late, sorry about that. I have the next chapter already written as I do with every following chapter before I post but sometimes it takes longer with the Beta's than usual..they are busy people. So anyways here it is hope you enjoy it :D
Oh and Me and a few of my girls are doing a contest. Its a NO BELLA ALLOWED CONTEST. Which means no Bella in the fic at all. Submissions are being accepted from the 1st Feb, details can be found here: http://www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/u/2216993/