Warning: This story deals with domestic violence and the struggles to recover. If you have problems with this issue please don't read this.

Disclaimer: Ms Meyers owns Twilight and all its characters.

Big thanks to my Beta's Taloolah, dizzygirl28 and Beate73. You girls are awesome; I appreciate all the work you do for me, helping me make my stuff presentable. Love you guys.

Exchanged

EPOV

I had become more and more agitated as the week progressed. It was Friday and I was on the verge of a semi coma. The prospect of meeting Jake's dad was both exciting and terrifying.

Seth had called a few times during the last few weeks, and we had made arrangements for a dinner, including Alice and Jasper, but had decided to schedule it for after I had met Jake's dad. I was way too keyed up to be able to handle a dinner with Seth and meeting Jake's dad. So, the dinner was tentatively set for the following weekend, on the assumption things went well with Mr. Black.

Alice had become quite close with Seth and had demanded that he be a part of the wedding. They were hanging out together so often that, if it weren't for the fact that Seth was gay, Jasper would have been having anger management issues. As it was, he was put out somewhat.

That was the topic of discussion as Jasper kept me company and tried to stop me from freaking out completely. Jake was working late and Jazz had gotten off work early, leaving Jake to deal with paper work. And since Alice was out with Seth, yet again, he decided to spend some time with me.

"Edward, he seems to have taken your place in occupying my soon to be wife's attention." Jasper pouted, and I rolled my eyes. This was not the first time we'd had this conversation, and I was sure it wouldn't be the last.

"Are you saying you had a problem with the amount of time Alice and I spent together?" I schooled, trying to maintain a hurt look while attempting very hard not to chuckle.

"What? Of course not. You know perfectly well that's not what I meant. Come on, Edward, this is about me, not you. I miss my fiancé. That's all I'm saying." His pout grew to comical proportions and that was all I could take - I burst out laughing. "Nice, Edward. I appreciate that," Jasper scoffed.

"Well, I seem to remember you laughing at me quite a bit as I was discovering my feelings for Jake, so turnabout is fair play don't you think?" I chuckled again at Jasper's petulant attitude; it was always amusing when he got like this, especially since it had never happened before Seth, but he seemed to bring it out in him often.

It was so different for him when it was me and Alice because Jasper and I were just as close as me and Alice, so he never felt left out or neglected. Seth wasn't as comfortable around Jasper and I think it had a lot to do with the fact that Jasper, Jake and I were extremely close, so he wouldn't tolerate any talking about either of us. Whereas Alice would let you get your emotions out without judgment.

"Maybe you just need to get to know him better, make more of an effort. You can start at this dinner we're having." Jasper sighed and moved to sit next to me, throwing his arm over my shoulder.

"I have, buddy." I rolled my eyes at him again, knowing that he hadn't really tried at all.

"Look, Jasper, you making friends with Seth wouldn't mean you were betraying me or Jake. We both like Seth and want him to be happy. I just don't want him to be happy with Jake." It was my turn to get petulant at the thought of Seth still being in love with my fiancé. Though it was hard to stay that way when I thought about the fact Jake was mine and we were getting married. A huge grin spread across my face and Jasper elbowed me in the ribs.

"I know, I know. It's just...look at you Edward. You're smiling, you're finally happy and I just don't want anyone getting in the way of that. And I don't know Seth well enough to know whether he would do something to make you uncomfortable. He seemed like a nice guy, and he was good to you while he was giving you a tattoo. But you know me, buddy, I'm suspicious by nature, and even more so when it comes to you. Who's to say he wasn't being nice to you to score points with Jake?"

I sighed loudly. I couldn't help but feel a little bit guilty because I had thought the same thing in the beginning, before talking about my insecurities with Jake. That was another thing I'd learned lately - to open up to Jake and tell him what I was thinking and feeling. And I have to admit, it really helped, a lot.

Not having to be constantly worried about what I said, was freeing and it was another little reason, surrounded by a million others that made me feel safe and secure with Jake. I could say anything, I didn't have to filter my thoughts at all and Jake would never get mad. Even when I said stupid things without thought, he would just smile and kiss me.

"He's not like that, and even if he was, Jake would never fall for it. He loves me, Jasper; he really loves me, in a way I have never felt before." I swallowed back the lump in my throat and turned to look at Jasper.

"You really have come a long way since meeting him." Jasper pulled me too him and hugged me, "I'm so proud of you Edward."

"I'm kinda proud of me too, Jazz, but it's Jake that makes the difference. I trust him, Jazz. He makes me feel safe and comfortable. I know it sounds stupid and sappy, but he completes me. He lets me be me, no judgments, even when I'm being totally irrational, or completely asinine." I shrugged my shoulders and added, "I love him."

Jasper and I continued to talk until Jake finally came home. In the beginning, when he went back to work, it was really hard on me. Even though I was working too, I was constantly worried about something happening to Jake. Always thinking, what if he got shot? What if something bad happened and he was taken away from me forever? Those thoughts crippled me in the beginning, but Jake put my mind at easy by calling me whenever he had a break.

I knew it was irrational to have to hear his voice all the time to reassure myself, and I had spoken to Alice about it who made me feel better by telling me she felt the exact same way in the beginning. So now I was to the point where, even though I still worried, Jake only needed to contact me if he was going to be late, so I wouldn't worry as much.

As usual, he put me first and took the time to make me feel special and completely loved by calling me during his lunch hour, regardless of me telling him he didn't have to. And he never failed to let me know when he was working overtime, which he was doing a lot of lately. He had taken a lot of time off during the whole Sam thing and he needed to make it up and to store some more time for our honeymoon.

"Next time you get the paperwork, Whitlock, that was a nightmare," Jake said as he walked through the door. He made his way over to me and plonked himself down on the couch, wrapping his arms around me and kissing me chastely on the lips before burying his face in my hair and inhaling deeply. "Ah much better." I chuckled at his behavior. Whenever Jake had a rather bad day, he had taken to burying his nose in my head and inhaling my scent, telling me it calmed and grounded him.

"Glad I could be of service." I smiled as he began to chuckle.

"I can think of better ways for you to be of service," he whispered into my ear before pulling back to admire his handy work of turning my face red. He still loved to make me blush and was still very effective at it.

"And that, my boys, is my cue to leave," Jasper said, laughing as he got up to leave. "Thanks for the chat, Edward, I will take it under advisement."

"Sure ya will." Jasper smiled as I got up to hug him goodbye, "thanks for keeping me company, Jazz, I will talk to you when we get back from seeing Jake's dad." Jake hugged Jasper too, and then we both walked him to the door, saying our goodbyes before making our way back to the couch.

"So, you still nervous about tomorrow, baby?" Jake asked, his voice full of amusement. This was one topic he always found humor in, since he was certain his dad and I would get along like a house on fire. I still wasn't so sure. Even though a lot of my insecurities had been laid to rest by Jake, sometimes it was hard to forget where I had come from.

Sam telling me I was useless and no good was hard to get out of my head when it came to meeting new people I really wanted to impress. And I worried that maybe Sam was right and that Mr. Black would see it too.

"Edward, baby, look at me." I pulled my head up from his chest, having subconsciously laying it there. It was something that I did all the time, a habit I couldn't break. Whenever I was doubting myself, or feeling unworthy, I would automatically go to the place that gave me the most comfort, Jake's chest.

I found solace there; it was my peaceful place that gave me strength. His chest was so solid and strong, and his scent would permeate through my nose, bringing me more comfort than anything else in the world.

"Baby, you know how much I love you, and trust me, my dad is going to love you to. How can anyone who crosses your path not?" I gave him the look; my 'whatever' look, and he shook his head and laughed before taking my face between his big, strong hands and kissing me deeply. I couldn't help but wrap myself around him and pull him closer. Whenever he was near me, I could never get him close enough, but that never stopped me from trying.

I grumbled when he pulled back, briefed by the sudden loss of his wonderful mouth, but he just smiled and pulled me to my feet. "Time to get some dinner, I don't know about you, but I'm starving."

"You are always hungry," I said as he led me to the kitchen to hunt for something to cook for dinner. I had already prepared it earlier. And as we got closer to the kitchen, he looked back and me and smiled.

"You made stew?" I nodded and he pulled me to him, kissing my lips and then the tip of my nose. "My favorite."

"I know, you tell me that every time I make it for you."

"I do, do I? Well that's just because you make it so well and I figure if I keep telling you, you will keep making it." I laughed at his explanation and swatted him on the backside after I pushed him towards the table I had already set.

"Sit. I will dish up." And watched as he did what he was told. We talked about his day and mine as we ate, sitting across from each other. A rule I had made after many a dinner I'd cooked had been wasted due to Mr. Handsy not being able to control himself. Not that I minded, being as I was just as guilty as he was, but it was nice to have the meal I'd prepared actually eaten.

After dinner, Jake sent me to get ready for bed, stating he had a surprise for me. I didn't argue, nor did I ask what the surprise was. I had gotten use to Jake doing this from time to time, and since he had never once disappointed me, I was eager to follow instruction.

I laid out some sleep pants on the bed and made my way to the bathroom, turning the shower on and letting it heat up while I brushed my teeth. Once the shower was ready, I jumped in and set about my routine of washing my hair and soaping myself. I had started looking at my body more in the shower lately, tracing the scars on the front of my body. Each day I would take one scar and remember how I had gotten it, followed by the memory of Jake and his tongue following the line of the scar before places hundreds of kisses over it, telling me how beautiful I was and how much he loved me.

It made the whole ordeal of feeling unworthy or useless, so much easier to deal with. Jake had begun to heal me so much better than any therapy session, though I still attended those from time to time. Esme was still helping me, well we were helping each other, but that's another story.

I was so lost in thought I hadn't heard Jake enter the shower, and I jumped, squealing like a little girl when I felt his arms wrap around me. He chuckled in my ear when my head fell back against his shoulder and smiled into my neck as he placed kisses there. I sighed in contentment, and spun around placing my head in his chest.

"Remembering to forget again baby?" Jake asked. We had talked about how much he had helped me with his loving gestures and how I would spend time going over each scar and try to replace the old memory with the new. He called it my remembering to forget time.

"Yeah, I think it's working really well. I was just looking at this one here," I pointed to the one that ran from my right nipple down to my belly button, it was one of the longest scars I had, and it was extremely ugly in my eyes. "And you know what? I'm having a hard time remembering anything other than last week when you swirled your tongue around it from top to bottom and back up again over and over, placing kisses over it and telling me how beautiful I am."

I still remember how I got that scar, all of them really, but now when I looked at them the memory of how wasn't the first thing that came to mind. And it was a relief to know that I could look at myself again without having a panic attack or blacking out. Jake smiled at me, cupping my face in his hands and leaned in to kiss me. I wound my hands into his hair and pulled him closer, needing him like I needed air.

Before it got to hot and heavy, Jake pulled away and smiled at my pout. "I have a surprise for you, remember? Now let's finish up in here so I can give it to you, shall we?" I smiled and moved like a mad man, finishing up my routine and watching Jake move through his, pouting every time he slowed down.

Finally, when we were both done and dried off, Jake walked me into the bedroom with his hands over my eyes. My body vibrated with my excitement as we got to the bed, and Jake uncovered my eyes. There on the bed was a bouquet of flowers, on the night stand was a bottle of champagne and two glasses, and next to them were a bowl of chocolate dipped strawberries. I turned and kissed him passionately, thanking him. He pulled back from me and looked me in the eyes, his love and devotion to me shining there for anyone to see.

"I'm glad you like it, baby, but this isn't the surprise," With that he leaned over and pulled something out of the drawer, and then got down on one knee. My excitement grew exceptionally as he looked up at me from under his thick lashes and cleared his throat, "Baby, you know how much I love you, how much I need you in my life. You mean more to me than anything or anyone ever has, and I want to spend my forever with you. Edward Masen, will you make me the happiest man on this earth and become my husband? Marry me, Edward."

I dropped to my knees and took his face in my hands, gripping him so tight I was sure I was causing him pain, but if he felt any he never said a word. "Yes, always yes, Jake, always. I love you so much, I would be honored to be your husband, lover, best friend and partner for life," I answered, still unsure where all that came from, but so glad I found the words. There would never be enough words, or the right words to express how I truly felt about him, what he really meant to me, but I would try forever to make him see.

Jake then opened the boxes he had in his hands, both containing identical rings. They had simple, but intricate patterns decorating the circles in the center, which rose up higher than the outside of the band. It was a lovely Celtic design and I fell in love with them the minute my eyes saw them. Just looking at them made me think of him, of us. The way our lives weaved together, even with all the bumps along the way, it made something beautiful.

I smiled up at him, and held out my hand as he pulled my ring from the box and placed it on my finger, then he handed me the other box and held out his hand and I repeated the process, bringing his hand my to lips and kissing the ring when I was done.

Jake pulled me to my feet while kissing me, and placed me gently on the bed, his lips never leaving mine as I pulled him down with me. The feeling of his body pressed against mine did wonderful things to me, and I moaned, my mind running six steps ahead of me, wanting to feel him inside me, to become a part of me, linked together in the most intimate of ways.

"Do you want to make love to me, Edward?" Jake asked as he pulled way, his voice husky. It was not exactly what I was thinking, but it was what I was ready for, I knew that much. I was still a little scared of hurting him, but after all the practice we had been doing, I knew I was ready.

I buried my head in his chest and nodded against it before mumbling, "You have to show me, and tell me if I do anything wrong." I knew I was blushing, I could feel the heat rising in my cheeks as I spoke, but Jake just kissed my head before putting his fingers under my chin and lifting my eyes to his.

"Of course, baby, we will go slowly. Whatever you want."

Jake removed both of our towels and rolled on to his back, pulling me on top of him. He reached into the bedside draw and removed the lube and a condom. We had had many discussions about condoms and the use of them in a committed relationship, and we both decided it would be a good idea to use them until we were both comfortable with each other's bodies completely.

A shiver ran through me as I made my way down his body. I had done this many times before, but knowing that this was it, this was the time that I would take Jake, the first time he had ever let anyone take him this way, was intimidating.

I took him into my mouth and pumped some lube onto my hand at the same time, taking my time to rub my fingers together and warm it up. I gently began to run my fingers over his entrance, circling a few times before adding a finger, pumping it rhythmically in and out of him before adding a second and finally a third.

Jake's moans were encouraging me as I continued to stretch him for me, my hand and mouth moving in complete synchronicity. "I'm ready, baby," Jake said, running his fingers through my hair and smiling down at me. I gulped nervously, before sitting back on my heals and taking the condom in my hand, opening the wrapper and placing it on myself. It took me a few go's to get it right, having never worn one before, but Jake was as patient as always.

With a steady breath, I moved forward and placed my head at his entrance before looking up at Jake, sure my nerves were clear on my face and asked, "Ready?" He smiled, running his hands up and down my arms before taking a deep breath and nodding. With that, I pushed my head through his tight ring of muscle, my eyes never leaving his face.

Jake blew out a large breath, his face pulled into a grimace as he tried to get his breathing under control. I waited until he opened his eyes and nodded again, letting out another breath as I pushed forward a little more. It went on like this, slowly but surely, until I was fully seated within him.

We were both shaking by this time, and I wasn't sure either of us was enjoying it all that much. But we pushed through it, and Jake bucked his hips letting me know he was ready. We moved together easily as my hand reached down between us and took hold of Jake's cock, which was almost flaccid after the initial breach. It slowly came back to life as I timed my thrusts with my strokes, and we both moaned as we made love.

I tried to find his sweet spot and angled my hips slightly, varying my position until I heard the telltale signs that I had finally hit it. Jake's hands moved down to my ass and he pulled me into him harder and faster. "Oh shit, Edward, right there baby, God damn." He breathed out as his hips jumped off the bed to meet each of my thrusts.

It wasn't long until we both came undone and Jake spilled out across his chest, while I filled the condom inside of him.

I pulled out of him and tried to remember what to do now, but Jake just moved me to the side of him and got up, returning later with a wash cloth and gently wiped down my cock, cleaning me up. He had already taken care of himself in the bathroom. When he crawled back into bed I had to chuckle as I moved my head to his chest.

"Isn't that supposed to be my job?" Jake just laughed.

"I guess old habits are hard to break, baby, I'm sorry, I'm just so use to being the one who takes care of that stuff." I had noticed when Jake was walking back to me he had a bit of a limp and I bit my lip, afraid I had hurt him.

"Jake?"

"Mmmm?" His eyes were closed and he had a small smile on his face. I kissed his chest and snuggled in deeper to him before asking him.

"Did I hurt you? I saw you limp?" He chuckled.

"No, baby, I'm a little sore, but that's to be expected. Besides, you're not exactly little in that department."

"Look who's talking," I replied, laughing along with him. I knew I was well taken care of in that area, but Jake was a big boy. I don't think I had ever seen anyone that big before.

"So, how was it for you, baby?" Jake asked, and I took a moment to think about it before answering, deciding it was best to be honest.

"Umm, well, it was good and all, but I don't think it's something I want to do a lot. Maybe just on special occasions. I think I would much prefer being on the bottom." I could feel my face heat up at my statement, but it was the truth, as much as I loved being inside of Jake, and I did love it, it just wasn't the same. I had a burning need for him to take over, I loved that Jake was such a big man. He was so dominate in his appearance and it turned me on to no end. It just felt weird and kind of wrong being on top of him in that way. I couldn't really explain it well, or right, even to myself, I just knew that I wanted Jake to take me.

Jake breathed out a sigh that sounded like relief. And I had to chuckle at that, "You too, huh?" I said finally looking up at him.

"Yeah, I didn't mind it, and I mean when you hit that spot, I saw stars and all, but..." he trailed off and I hugged him tighter.

"I know what you mean, baby, we like what we like. I guess it wasn't bad for both of us being our first time in different roles and all, but..." I trailed off too. There wasn't that much more to say. Jake was a top, I was a bottom, simple as that. And though I was sure we would switch again from time to time, I was comfortable with the fact that I wanted Jake to fill me instead of the other way around, most of the time.

"Jake?"

"Yes, baby?"

"Do you want to make love to me?" Jake sputtered and coughed a bit, and then tried to get himself back under control,

"Now?" He asked, his brows furrowed together. I stared up at him from my spot on his chest, my chin resting against my hands.

"If you're up for it?" I smirked at him as he eyes clouded over and his dick twitched under my leg. I was unsure where this confidence came from. Maybe it was the fact that we were now wearing rings, or the fact that he had giving himself to me so freely even though it was not something he had ever done before. Or maybe it was just the fact that I finally had someone I truly loved and trusted in my life. But for whatever reason, Jake made loved to me, and it was passionate and raw and truly one of the most wonderful moments of my life.

There were no flashbacks as he entered me, there was no pain but for the initial burn. Everything was perfect and wonderful. Jake was an excellent lover, and very attentive, just like he was with everything concerning me.

The best thing about the way he made love to me was the fact that I came undone without him or I ever touching my cock. It was beautiful and magical and I saw the universe explode with color behind my closed eyes as I came harder than I had ever come before.

We fell asleep that night wrapped in each other's arms, truly satisfied. He wore me out so much I didn't even think about what the next day would hold as I drifted off into one of the best sleeps I had ever had. Dreaming of Jake, taking me over and over again.

Jake woke me up a little after nine with loving kisses to my neck and back as he lay spooning me. I smiled as I felt his hardness push against my ass every so often, and I pushed back into him moaning. Until I remembered that we were going to meet his dad in just a few hours.

I must have started to tremble because Jake was holding me close and telling me how much he loved me.

"I've got ya, baby, it's okay. Do you want me to take your mind of it?" His asked his voice dropping a few octaves, lust filling it.

And he did just that, making love to me again before picking me up like I was precious china and carrying me to the shower. He washed me lovingly his hands never leaving my skin unless he was picking something up or putting it down. Then he dried and dressed me, again carrying me to the kitchen and making me breakfast.

If this was how he was going to react every time we made love, I think we will have to do it more often; I thought to myself and chuckled.

"What's got you laughing, beautiful?" Jake asked, and when I told him he threw his head back and laughed loudly before moving to me and kissing my neck. " I like the way you think."

It wasn't long before we were on the road, and before I knew it, we had pulled up outside Jake's dad's house. My stomach was a knot of nerves as Jake came around and opened the car door for me. I smiled up at him and got out of the car, my knees shaking slightly as I tried to stand. Jake wrapped his arms around me, leaning into me, licking my ear before whispering, "Everything is going to be fine, baby, I promise you. He will love you." But that wasn't what I was worried about as I looked around the place we were standing.

This was the place I used to live. Sam's house was only a few streets away. It was all so familiar, and I shuddered again before the realization dawned on Jake. "Oh, God, Edward, I didn't think. I'm so sorry, baby." He said gripping me tighter and leading me to his father's door. I don't remember getting to the door or his father opening it.

"What's wrong with him, son?"

"Dad, I didn't think. Sam, he.. The memories..God, please, dad, can you call Carlisle?"

Was all I heard before everything went black.

A/N Sorry this is late, next chapter is already with Beta's...things will be a bit slow for a while, I'm in the middle of organising a move, so for the rest of the month it might take longer than normal for chapters to get out.