CHAPTER 22
Toby shuffled sheepishly into the semi-formal restaurant 45 minutes later, having needed a brief walk to cool down. He was terrified of explaining to the others what had happened. That he had totally messed the entire plan up. That he hadn't stopped to think that what he was asking of her may not be what she wanted at all…
He was ashamed. He should have known. He should have thought of her fears and her worries, and considered that what she wanted may be different than what he wanted.
"Hey!" Aria greeted warmly as he found their table. She and Emily smiled in welcome. Hanna and Holmes had been chuckling in undertones at the opposite end, looking up only to acknowledge his presence.
It was Emily's face that fell first. "Where's Spencer?"
"Not coming." Toby took his seat definitively, flaring his cloth napkin across his lap, trying to ignore their burning gazes.
"Not coming?" Hanna demanded. "What do you mean, not coming?"
"I mean," Toby began dejectedly, "that she didn't want to."
"Why?" Aria asked softly.
Toby shrugged, trying to portray what he hoped would resemble indifference. "Didn't feel well."
"Cavanaugh," Holmes began sternly. "You fucked it up, didn't you?"
Hanna sharply backhanded his chest in disapproval. Holmes's hand flew up to the burgeoning bruise, massaging his pectoral sheepishly.
"I dunno what happened," Toby admitted. "I guess I didn't really think that she might not be up for more socializing…"
"It's okay, Toby," Emily said comfortingly, reaching across the table to pat his hand supportively. "She's in a weird place right now. She'll come around."
"I just don't want to spend the last few days fighting with her," Toby confessed. "Why does she have to insist on being so stubborn?"
"Women," Holmes agreed disdainfully. Hanna hit him again. "Ow! STOP THAT!"
"She's probably trying to make it easier for herself," Aria stated, ignoring Holmes's outburst. "Being angry at someone is a lot less painful than being upset…"
"Yeah," Toby agreed absentmindedly. He knew that Aria was right, but it didn't change how frustrating Spencer's behavior had been. It wasn't that he didn't understand – because he did. But he didn't want her to be angry with him over the course of the next few days…
"Spencer," Aria stated blankly.
Toby looked up sharply at the others, who were staring behind him in surprise. He turned to look over his shoulder, seeing that, indeed, Spencer was walking bashfully up to the table. She wore a simple black dress that hugged her figure in all the best places. She had curled her hair into ringlets that adorned either side of her face, flattering the shape of her cheekbones. His breath hitched in his chest. She looked beautiful.
"Hey," she replied softly, taking the empty seat beside Toby. She did not meet his eyes.
"Just in time," Hanna chirped, making a concerted effort to soften the tension. "We were just about to order!"
Spencer nodded noncommittally, burying her face in the menu. "This looks pretty complicated," she stated.
"It's all fondue," Hanna was explaining excitedly. She leaned over the table to point at certain items as she continued. "You get cheese first, then salad, then the entrée, then dessert. See, there are a lot of different cheese blends…"
Toby's attention to Hanna's lecture faded away. He could feel his heart beating in his ears as he wracked his brain for some way to make things right. Some way to indicate to her that he was sorry for trying to push her into something she didn't want to do…That he understood and was grateful she was here now. That he loved her more than the breath in his own lungs and wanted to make the next few days as magical as possible…
He settled for putting a gentle hand on her knee. She did not look at him, but after a moment, consented to resting her own hand atop his. Her fingers gently squeezed.
It was enough. It was an unspoken understanding and apology from both parties. And it was sufficient to make Toby feel considerably calmer.
As dinner progressed, Spencer seemed to lighten up little by little. Eventually, Holmes had her in stitches laughing as he told a story about some drunk guy in his English class who had passed out snoring mid-lecture. Toby observed happily as tears of mirth trickled from Spencer's eyes and she clutched at her side. This was his beautiful, joyful Spencer…The girl that he had fallen in love with, and the girl that he hoped would eventually be okay…
He continued to admire her face when she thought he wasn't looking. The sparkle was beginning to return to her chocolate eyes, and she sat up straighter as the weight began to lift from her shoulders. He knew she would be okay. She was the strongest person he knew. But he knew it would also take time…No matter how strong a person is, traumatic events can't just disappear. It takes a certain amount of adjustment and a certain amount of acceptance. He knew that she, of all people, would conquer this – just like she had conquered all of the other challenges and hardships in her life. Even if it came down to her primitive drive for success, she would make it happen.
When at long last dinner had concluded, Emily reached into her purse and extracted her hotel key.
"So…" she began uncertainly, unsure of how to make her point. "Aria and I talked it over – and we decided that you may have been right, after all."
"About what?" Spencer inquired, perplexed.
"About us staying at the apartment," Aria added. "You said that there was no possible way that we could impose. And we decided that you and Hanna know best."
"Of course," Spencer responded boastfully. Aria and Emily exchanged knowing glances before continuing.
"So – " Emily continued, presenting Spencer with the key card. "We decided that you and Toby should have the room."
A blush rose in Spencer's cheeks as she considered this. Toby feigned surprise, for he knew that the hotel room key had always been part of the plan. He had, however, thought that it would be a no-go after the disaster that had taken place earlier. And that part of him did not have to fake it.
"I – we couldn't," Spencer insisted, looking to Toby for assistance. "You already paid for it."
"I don't care," Emily stated definitively, pushing the card into Spencer's hand and closing her fingers over it. "We won't be staying there. And that's that. So either you and Toby take some time to spend together, or nobody stays there and we're just out two hundred dollars."
Spencer chewed on her lower lip. She did not like being outwitted in the slightest. At last she sighed, studying the key card in her hand. "Fine."
"All right. Settled," Aria concluded, standing from the table. "Now come and hug us good-bye."
Spencer chuckled softly and did as told. Toby watched as she mournfully bid her friends farewell, holding onto hugs far longer than she typically would. He knew she hated to say good-bye all over again. It hardly seemed fair that she had to say so many of them in such a short amount of time…
"We'll be back before you know it," Emily was telling her as she moved to hug Toby. Toby glanced over Emily's shoulder at Spencer laughing quietly with Aria, Hanna, and Holmes.
"Don't waste any more time," Emily whispered in his ear, planting a kiss on his cheek. She pulled back and studied his face, smiling, maternally straightening the collar of his shirt.
"I'll miss you," Toby told her softly. She nodded in reply.
"I'll miss you, too. But we'll see each other again. Soon."
Toby smiled somberly as she hugged him one last time.
He and Spencer watched disdainfully as Holmes and Hanna escorted the girls away from the restaurant, ultimately heading back to the apartment. Spencer was fidgeting with the hotel key in her hand, looking particularly nervous.
"This doesn't mean we have to do anything," Toby spoke supportively, wrapping her into a protective hug. "We know that, and they know that. It's just a chance for us to spend some time with each other."
This statement of reassurance seemed to cheer Spencer up slightly, as she smiled and planted a small kiss on his lips. "I'm happy we have the chance," she agreed.
The car ride to the hotel was one masked in silence. It was not of the awkward variety – merely contentment and perhaps dinner-related sleepiness. Spencer still reached across the center console to gently rub Toby's knee, indicating that she was enjoying his company. The last thing he wanted was for her to feel nervous or uncomfortable. That was not what this night was about…He mentally crossed his fingers, praying internally that he could calm her worries for just one night.
It wasn't until they had opened the door to unveil the honeymoon suite that Spencer found her voice again.
"Oh, my God," she muttered in amazement, studying the room's décor. There was a large Jacuzzi tub situated in the corner of the room, as well as a comfortable-looking king-sized bed with rose petals sprinkled across the comforter. She looked to Toby suspiciously, a small smile grazing her features.
"Am I supposed to believe that this was the room that Emily and Aria were planning on sleeping in tonight?" she asked sarcastically.
Toby grinned in response. "Nice work, detective. You found us out."
Spencer trailed her fingertips along the edge of the bed, looking thoughtfully down at it. She turned back to Toby questioningly, looking slightly anxious once more.
"I'm not expecting anything," he reassured again, approaching her to wrap his arms around her waist from behind. He rested his chin upon her shoulder, softly kissing her ear lobe. "All this bed is for is sleeping on."
He felt the muscles in Spencer's jaw tighten slightly as she smiled. She turned to look at his face on her shoulder, reaching up with one hand to stroke his cheek. "You're the most amazing person in the entire world," she whispered. He turned his face slightly to plant a kiss on her hand.
"I can't agree with you there, you see, because I feel the same way about you," he explained sweetly. "So we'll just have to agree to disagree."
Spencer chuckled in response, pulling away to take a seat on the bed. She moaned softly as she yanked her heels from her feet, massaging her toes greedily. "I hate those things," she muttered.
Toby laughed, beginning to unbutton his dress shirt. "Well, you don't need to wear them for me. As far as I'm concerned, you can burn them all in a bonfire."
She grinned. "It's surprisingly tempting," she agreed.
He fished his t-shirt and pajama pants out of the bag that Hanna, Aria, and Emily had brought to the hotel for him. He noticed that Spencer was involuntarily staring at his bare chest beneath the unbuttoned shirt. He suppressed a smile and instead made his way to the bathroom, so as to more appropriately undress. He did not want her to feel that any of it was intended to sway her decision. After pulling his pajamas on, he set his dress clothes on the bathroom counter in a confused heap, returning to the main room.
Spencer was sitting thoughtfully on the bed, her eyes trained on the bag that Toby had extracted his clothes from.
"Are there things in there for me?" she asked softly.
"As a matter of fact, there are," Toby smiled, digging into it once more. He pulled out one of Spencer's lacrosse t-shirts and a pair of pajama shorts. "Hanna took these from your room last night after you fell asleep."
Spencer rolled her eyes. "That sneaky wench," she said laughingly. She, too, stood and made her way back to the bathroom.
As she undressed, she studied herself in the mirror. There were still bruises on her collarbone, and a few hickeys near her breasts that she had not previously noticed. She gingerly touched them, aching as she considered their origin. She hated him with a fiery passion. She had never hated someone so much in her entire life…
She dressed quickly so as to not dwell on the markings of her body. In her haste, she mistakenly bumped Toby's clothes off the sink. She sighed softly to herself in annoyance, picking up his shirt and folding it nicely to replace it on the counter. She grabbed his pants to do the same, startled to find that something quite heavy tumbled out of the pocket and to the floor.
She reached down to get it, her heart fluttering as she studied its appearance. It was a velvet box, the kind that often housed the nicest sorts of jewelry.
"How sweet," she murmured to herself with a smile. He didn't have to get her a gift to show that he loved her…she knew with all of her heart that he did.
Her adult brain told her that she should put it back where she found it and forget about it until he was ready to give it to her, himself. However, the part of her that still clung to childhood was guiltily curious. She wanted to look inside. She could feign surprise later. She had done it before…he would never be the wiser.
She flipped the top open, and her heart just about launched itself from her chest.
"Spencer," Toby cried as he hurriedly padded around the corner and into the bathroom doorway. It was as though he had suddenly remembered leaving it in there and was hoping to sneak it away. He stared at the box in her hands, gulping. "Listen…I can explain…"
Her eyes flickered from him to the box, feeling lost for words. When she spoke, her voice came out in nothing but a whisper. "It's an engagement ring."
He shook his head fervently, grabbing the box from her hands. "It was a silly idea," he insisted nervously, half-heartedly fingering the diamond jeweled, white gold band.
She surprised herself when a sad knot descended into her stomach. She walked toward him slowly, craning her neck to meet his eyes.
"Why is it so silly?" she asked softly.
"Because," Toby began, pulling the ring from its velvet nest and closing it in his fist protectively. "I already told you that I don't expect you to wait for me while I'm gone…And it wouldn't be fair to give this to you after I said that."
"Is that what tonight was all about?" Spencer asked curiously, fighting to calm the fluttering beat of her heart.
He sighed dejectedly. "Yeah. I was going to ask you before dinner…Dinner and the hotel room were meant to be part of a celebration." He scoffed quietly to himself. "I didn't even consider the fact that you might say no…I was being selfish."
She gently took his fist in her hand, uncurling his fingers to gaze at the ring once more. She looked up at him questioningly.
"How would you have asked me?" she murmured.
He stared into her eyes, blinking rapidly as though to make sense of what she was asking. He cleared his throat and stepped closer to her. "I was going to tell you how much I love you," he began quietly. "How I've loved you since the day at the Pinewood Motel. How you being comfortable sharing your vulnerability with me was the single most beautiful thing I've ever experienced." He took a deep breath. "I would tell you that the entire time we were apart, I never stopped thinking about you. That I kept a picture of you in my wallet and I looked at it every day."
Spencer reached up to gingerly stroke his face. He gulped involuntarily and continued.
"I would tell you that I can't imagine my life without you, and that even when I had to be without you, I never let you go."
Spencer traced her thumb along his bottom lip. "Would you have gotten down on one knee?" she asked curiously.
He nodded enthusiastically, seemingly finding his confidence once more. As if on cue, he clumsily tumbled down to the floor in the fashion she had just described, holding the ring out before her.
"What would you have done if I said yes?" Spencer asked now, the beginnings of tears clinging to her eyelashes.
"I would put the ring on your finger…like this," Toby said softly, sliding the band delicately onto her left ring finger. He slowly stood up, still clinging to her hand. "And I would tell you how much I love you and how I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you."
Spencer smiled, choking softly on a sob that lodged in her throat. "That's the most beautiful proposal I've ever had," she stated.
Toby chuckled nervously, placing his hands upon her hips. "I'm hoping it's the only proposal you've ever had…"
She laughed quietly too, though it was immediately swallowed by a tearful cry. He gently reached one hand to her face to wipe away her tears with his thumb. "It's my turn to ask you a question now," he decided, his voice so low that she would not have heard him if he was any further away.
"Anything," Spencer agreed.
"What would you have said if this hypothetical proposal was real?"
She froze, silently appraising his eyes with her own. His sapphire irises danced in anticipation, flickering back and forth across her face.
"I would have said yes," she decided at last. His face was closing in on hers, a mere few centimeters standing between them.
"So what if I said it was real?"
She nodded slowly, a few tears trickling across the smile that grazed her lips. "Yes."
He emitted a noise of combined surprise and joy, lifting her into his arms to spin her around in celebration. She giggled happily into his neck as he did so.
"I love you so much," he stated.
"I love you too," she replied, her tears of joy free flowing now as she digested what had just taken place.
Upon setting her back on her feet, he immediately kissed her. She returned the kiss in desperation, committing her entire heart and soul into it. She nibbled on his bottom lip, seductively backing him against the bathroom wall. He moaned softly into her mouth as she pressed her body more tightly against his, running her fingertips down his stomach and toward the drawstring of his pajama pants.
"Are you sure?" he murmured into her lips.
"Positive," she replied. He trembled involuntarily, his hands traveling beneath her shirt and grasping at her back. He kissed her hungrily, beginning to push her shirt up and away, breaking the embrace only to pull it over her head. He lifted her easily, setting her on the bathroom counter and stepping between her legs. The thin fabric that separated his anatomy from hers caused her to shiver in pleasure, craning her neck back as he planted butterfly kisses on every inch of her bare skin. He paused at the hickeys on her breasts, touching them thoughtfully. An indiscernible emotion flickered across his face.
"They don't matter," she declared dismissively, yanking his shirt over his head and breathlessly pulling him closer. "I want new ones."
He squared his jaw, prepared to accept that challenge as he lowered his mouth to her chest, intent on reclaiming his territory. She moaned softly, burying her hands in his short hair and arching into him. He began trailing his fingers across her stomach, pulling her shorts away from her body. They tumbled carelessly to the floor beneath them. His gaze rose to hers once more, kissing various parts of her face in adoration.
"I hate that he did that to you," he muttered quietly.
She trailed her fingertips down the length of his temple, studying his azure eyes appreciatively. He turns his fact to meet her hand, his mouth planting small kisses on her palm.
"Make me forget," Spencer stated huskily. "Make love to me the way it should be done." She marveled at his naked body, curling her legs around his buttocks to close what little distance there was. She pulled his face to hers urgently to kiss him. His lips were eager but careful as they met hers once more, his fingers raking themselves through her hair. He was gentle in everything that he did, and that included making love.
The four months that threatened to approach with haste were somehow becoming more and more insignificant. There was no doubt in her mind that she would miss him, but knowing that he would come back to plan a wedding with her was the greatest comfort she could fathom. That in four months time, they would be looking only to the future on the horizon. That in a mere 120 days, he would be back with her, sketching out the rest of their lives.
And suddenly, nothing else mattered. Horny boys making unwanted advances were inconsequential. College classes could easily be tackled, for Spencer Hastings had graduated as valedictorian of her class. Her friends would be leaving once more, but she knew she could always count on them for support. Hanna's room was a mere wall away, and Aria and Emily could be reached at the touch of a button. They had proven to her this weekend that they would fly to her aid at a moment's notice. She loved them dearly for that and only hoped she would be able to repay the very generous favor someday.
Not even 'A' could have rained on her parade. She was going to marry the man that she adored, and nobody could stop her. No amount of stress or concern could possibly shatter the feeling of love and dedication she shared with Toby at this exact moment. She was suddenly grateful for every inch of his skin, roving her hands across his body without thought. His muscles tensed appreciatively under her touch, mutual desire swallowing both of them whole.
This was the way it was meant to be. Memories of Cody's carnal advances were fading quickly away as Spencer climaxed for the second time, pulling her fingernails greedily down Toby's back. He was becoming a distant thing of the past. Toby was very much her present and her future, and though she had no basis for comparison, she was sure he was undoubtedly the best love maker in the creation of the universe.
When he at last collapsed into her arms, breathing heavily, she caressed the back of his neck in loving adoration. The smile that was plastered her face could not be controlled.
"You're my everything," he murmured into her neck, softly kissing the skin where his lips rested.
She gently brushed her dangling hair from his face, leaning down to kiss his temple.
"I can't wait to be your wife."
TO BE FOLLOWED BY BRIEF EPILOGUE