The next few days were hard on the family. Everyone struggled to find where they belonged, what their role and place would be in this mess. Everyone felt some guilt and responsibility for what had happened and everyone wanted to help make it better. Bill obsessed himself with the investigation, he spent his days with the police and FBI grilling them on what they were doing, trying to offer his help and advice. He didn't go to the hospital, Margene was getting better on her own, she didn't need him to hold her hand, he thought he could be doing more productive things.
Nikki took over running the house, the cooking the cleaning the shopping. She didn't want to go to the hospital, and she didn't want to think about the investigation. She answered questions when she was asked but she didn't seek them out. In all she avoided talking about what was happening, and the boys soon worked out she wasn't the one to answer their questions. Sarah and Scott stayed at the house, they took care of the bulk of the child minding, they were the ones the children turned to, to talk about what was happening. Teeny, Cara-Lyn, and Wayne wanted to talk about it, Raymond stayed rather quiet and the youngest Lester and Aaron didn't understand any of it, they just wanted to where their mom and sister were and when they were going to come home.
Barb floated, she spent a lot of time at the hospital but Bill didn't want her spending the night; that job was left to Ben. Ben didn't leave the hospital; he stayed with Margene as she slowly recovered.
Two days after the attack the doctors had taken Margene off all the sedatives. She was still on strong painkillers which made her drowsy but you could wake her up if you had to. For the most part Ben let her sleep; it was easier than trying to explain to her why Bill wasn't there, to tell her Nell was still missing. She cried a lot when was awake, which lead to her vomiting and the physical pain she was in increasing.
On day three Margene work up to the sound of a nurse puttering around in her room, she was making notes on her chart and checking something beside her bed.
"What time is it?" she asked trying to get her bearings.
"6am," the nurse told her smiling. "How are you feeling today?"
"Okay," she said slowly then a wave of nausea hit. "I'm gonna be sick." She gasped sitting up in the bed. The nurse grabbed a bowl and stuck it under her mouth just in time. The act of vomiting was painful; it pulled and twisted on her injuries, making her eyes water. The woman rubbed her back and placed some cushions behind her so she could lie back in bed.
"How do you feel now?"
She groaned by way of response, she didn't feel okay anymore she felt terrible, the nausea was still running through her and everything hurt. "I feel sick."
The nurse gave her a knowing nod and marked something on her chart. "I'll let your doctor know, he might be able to do something for you," she told her. "Just try and get some rest now."
Margie smiled back and watched the nurse leave the room carrying the bowl then she looked to her side and saw Ben sleeping in the chair by her bed. She couldn't remember a moment Ben hadn't been there with her. She loved that he was there but couldn't help wishing sometimes he was Bill. Bill hadn't been to see her, she knew he was out looking for Nell but she wished he'd come see her too. She missed him and longed for him to comfort her. Ben tried to comfort her, he was really good but he wasn't Bill. She blinked her eyes and tears ran down her face, she wished she didn't feel so sick and tired, she didn't like being at the hospital, she wanted to get out and find her girl. She closed her eyes and fell back into an uneasy sleep.
When she woke up it was an hour later, her doctor was standing at the side of her bed looking at her chart.
"Hey," she said to let him know she was awake. "How do I look?"
"Great," the doctor smiled at her. "Your kidneys are finally working at 100%, your temperature and blood pressure are both normal. How are you feeling?"
She thought about the vomiting and nausea was still there. "Like I'm going to be sick," she told him.
The doctor nodded. "Yes, the nurse mentioned that," he seemed to pause a moment to think. "Aside from that, how's your pain?"
"It only hurts when I vomit,"
"Okay," the doctor reached for one of the machines beside her and began pressing buttons when he was done he turned back to her. "I want to try something for the next few hours," he began to say. "One of the side effects of the pain meds you're on is nausea and vomiting. Right now I've taken you off them. I'll be back later today to see how you're going, in the mean time if the pain gets too bad or you feel worse get the nurse to page me."
"Okay," She wasn't sure if what he'd done was good or bad but at least he'd done something.
She lay in the bed and waited for the pain to hit, for something to happen but nothing did. She fell asleep again and didn't wake up for several hours.
Ben spent a lot of his day watching Margie sleep, he had books and magazines to read and a video game to play with but after a while they got boring or he'd start to enjoy himself a little and feel he had to stop. He wasn't allowed to enjoy himself, he wasn't allowed to feel any sought of positive emotion, it was wrong. At those times he would watch Margie and he'd think and pray.
She didn't sleep peacefully, she'd flinch and shake, sometimes she'd start talking, crying, her face would flicker and he could tell whatever she was dreaming wasn't pleasant. The first few times he'd woke her up from the dreams but soon he realized their reality was a nightmare too, it wasn't any better so now he just let her sleep.
She was having one of those nightmares now, he could see the torment running through her body and then her eyes flew open.
Margie lay on her back; she took deep breaths and tried to calm herself down. She'd been having nightmares again, this time she'd been on a crowed street, ahead of her she could see the man and woman walking along carrying Nell. Nell was crying for her, reaching for her, she tried to run to her but the couple never seemed to get any closer. She yelled for the people around her to help but they just kept walking and then she woke up. She lay on her back waiting for the nausea to hit, for the uncontrollable urge to vomit to take hold of her body but it didn't come. The minutes passed by and she began to think maybe what the doctor had done had worked. She felt better than she had for days, not only was she not feeling sick but her mind felt clearer, the groggy haze she'd been in was gone. She used her arm to try and sit herself up, the movement caused pain to ripple through her. She let out a small moan and Ben reached out for her.
"Margie, are you okay?" he asked.
"Yeah," she said trying to work out in her head how bad the pain was, if she could handle it or needed something. She didn't want to take anything, not now that she realised how foggy the meds made her feel. "Can you get the nurse?" She asked deciding it was a little too much.
When the nurse came she told her the doctor said she could have acetaminophen, their hope was the mild drug would be enough to manage her pain and she wouldn't need to go back on the opiates. She swallowed the pills and lay back down to wait for the drugs to kick in.
Within thirty minutes her pain was bearable, she could sit up and roll over without any significant problems and her head still felt clear. With her mind intact she began planning her escape. She didn't want to be in the hospital any longer she needed to get out there and find her daughter. She knew exactly what she wanted; she just needed to get out of the hospital to do it. After lunch she decided to make her move.
"Ben I want to go home." She said to get things started.
"I know," he said not knowing what she was planning. "The hospital sucks but you need to get better."
"I feel better," she with as much determination as she could. "I have to get out of here, I have to find Nell."
Margie's words remained Ben of the first day in the hospital, when Margie had first regained consciousness and she'd tried to climb out the bed and leave. She wasn't trying to climb out now but the same fear and desperation rang in her voice.
"Please Benny I've got to get out of here," she was saying. "I need you to go home and get me some clothes."
"Margie –"
"Please Benny," she begged.
" – I don't think leaving is a good idea. The doctor will tell you when you can leave."
"I'll talk to the doctor," She was working herself up into a real mess. "Please just go home get me some clothes."
She was begging him to go, she was crying and her body was beginning to show the first signs of stress.
"Okay," he agreed to go because he was afraid her heart would stop again. It wasn't likely, she was so much stronger than she'd been that first day but he couldn't help being afraid. He'd seen firsthand how quickly something could go from bad to worse. "I'll go get you some clothes but that doesn't mean we're leaving."
She didn't seem to hear the second half of his sentence. "Thank you Benny," she simply said and he could see the relief rushing over her.
-8-8-8-8-
Nikki and Barb stood in Barb's kitchen; they were watching the FBI pack up all their things. It had been three days since everything had happened and the FBI had told them that morning there was no need for them to stay at the house anymore. They weren't gaining anything by being there and didn't want to intrude on the family's privacy anymore. Both women had told them they could stay, that the family didn't mind, they wanted to make sure their case stayed a priority, that people were still doing everything they could to find Nell and they were afraid them leaving the house might change that. Nothing was going to change their mind though, and they assured the family they were continuing to do everything they could.
Ben pulled his mom's car into the family driveway, it felt strange coming home, he hadn't been there since that night. He climbed out the car and walked to the door; he used his key to open it and stepped inside. The house looked normal, the FBI was gone; he heard noise coming from the kitchen and walked that way.
Ben was the last person Barb and Nikki expected to see when they heard the front door open and close.
"Ben what are you doing home?" Barb asked him. "Is Margie okay?"
"Yes she's fine," Ben said assuring his mom. "She sent me home to get her some clothes. She seems to think the doctor is going to let her come home today."
"Today?" A shocked expression crossed Nikki's face. "She's coming home today?"
"Maybe," Ben shrugged. "I don't know. She wants to go home, she begged me to go get her some clothes so here I am. Can you help me find some stuff?"
"Yeah sure," Barb was the one who stepped forward. "I think there are some of her clothes in my laundry."
"She's not supposed to be coming home today," Nikki said more to herself than anyone else. Barb and Ben were already leaving the room but she didn't move she was thinking about all the things she still needed to do before Margene came home.
Nikki shook her head and walked out the back door; she walked to Margene's house and carefully began pulling off the crime scene tape. They'd been given the all clear to enter the house that morning but so far no one had. She screwed the yellow tape into a ball and then slid the door open. She stepped inside the house and began surveying the work.
The entire down stairs needed to be cleaned, some of the furniture was out of place, there was black finger print dust covering many surfaces, and there was the blood. There was a large pool of it on the wall by the stairs, it seemed to streak sideways a little, she followed it to the ground, there were a series of smaller pools leading to the centre of the room where a massive pool of blood lay.
She walked forward to have a closer look, surrounding the massive pool of blood were dozens of hand and foot prints, some large adult sized but many more small children's' prints. The small prints belonged to the boys, they were all around the massive pool of blood but as she looked closer around the house she could see them in other places too, the front door, the linen closet, the hand rail of the stairs. A shiver ran though her body, she could see her boys everywhere, picture them running around trying to save Margie. She shook her head trying to shake the images lose she didn't want to be picturing it. Then she walked out the house and into her own.
She filled a bucket with warm soapy water grabbed a few rags and sponges and carried them back to Margene's house. She spent the rest of the afternoon cleaning, she scrubbed the walls and carpet, the small marks came off easy enough but there was nothing she could do to get rid of the larger pools of blood. She tried every cleaning trick she knew, she scrubbed until her hands were raw and close to bleeding, she scrubbed until she reached her breaking point and then she began to cry.