Gundam Seed: Killer's Realm

Phase 13 III: Just Plain Wrong

Indian Ocean, Barachiel, Athrun's Room

11:03 P.M. Local, 8:03 A.M. Orb

"Shit." Athrun said fearfully. Kira was an old friend, sure, but there had been some big changes since then.....for one thing, Kira had a very long, very sharp knife and knew how to use it. Out of the corner of his eye, Athrun could see Cagalli wincing, and almost reflexively drawing herself back from him. Huh? Then she looked back at Kira, back to him, and then sighed in relief.

Athrun reluctantly glanced over at Kira, and saw his best friend shaking his head with....was that a half-smile?

"What? You're not going to kill him like everyone else?" Cagalli snorted, looking at Kira suspiciously.

"Well Cagalli, unlike your previous flings, Athrun is...for lack of a better word, honorable, and probably didn't think of the political implications, the wealth, the power, so on and so forth. Plus, I know Athrun very well, so I think I can trust him with you." Kira replied, still half-grinning.

"Previous flings?" Mu, standing behind Kira, wondered. Jack snickered and started whispering into his ear.

"The first one, about four years ago, turned out to be some kind of pervert, and made some 'moves' on Cagalli if you get my meaning. After the first date, if you could call it that, she kicked him in the balls."

"Ouch." Mu said.

"And then, the next day, he was checked into the hospital for several broken bones and castration." Mu's expression made it seem like he was going to be sick.

"The next guy, about two years later, seemed a lot better. Suave, good-looking, rich.....or, at least, he used to be. Turned out that he was trying to get Cagalli for her money. So he turned up later missing an arm and a leg. The next guy though, he took the cake. Only about a month after the last one, and he was pulling the moves on Cagalli. Then she disappeared. The whole country was frantic, looking for her. Then Kira showed up, with her, both pretty normal. That guy was never found. So you see why me and Cagalli are surprised that Kira's not threatening Athrun with the balisong right now."

Mu nodded.

"Eh, I'm fine with it so long as you two don't start the PDA." Kira said, shrugging.

"Yeah, and he wants you to hook him up with Lacus." Jack said, grinning madly. Then the grin turned upside-down as he realized what he just said. At that point, everyone else got as far away as they could from Kira and Jack, Mu moving down the hall and Cagalli and Athrun taking shelter under the bunks.

Kira held up one hand, five fingers. Jack ran out the door and down the hall, pushing past Mu in his race for survival. For every second that passed, one of the fingers on Kira's hand clenched into a fist, until, after exactly 5.17 seconds, Kira and his fist sprinted down the hall after Jack. The remaining three listened really hard, and heard a very high-pitched shriek and the sound of high-velocity fist impacting on flesh. A second later, Kira walked back into the room, wiping blood off his fist with a napkin from the cafeteria.

"All hands, report to stations. Unidentified contact detected by sonar." A computerized femenine voice announced.

"Who was that?" Athrun asked, crawling out from under his bunk.

"That was the auto-report computer. It's a system me and Liene designed to organize and relay information." Kira said, tossing the blood-stained napkin into Athrun's trash bin.

"It's a glorified secretary." Jack groaned, crawling on the floor. Kira sighed. Then he turned around, and Jack screamed in his attempt to crawl away.

0000000000000000000000000000000000000000 -- Quis est a Iuguolo nisi a Iuguolo? – 0000000000000000000000000000000000000

Rau was already in the Charcharius, waiting. I don't think it's OMNI....despite their surprisingly able use of the Megalodon armor, OMNI hasn't deployed any large submarines in areas outside of the immediate areas of their naval bases.

"Commander Le Creuset, please report with your team to the bridge."

00000000000000000000000000000000000000000 -- Quis est a Iuguolo nisi a Iuguolo? – 00000000000000000000000000000000000000

Arriving at the bridge, Rau, Yzak, Dearka, and Nicol saw Kira, Cagalli, Liene and Athrun gathered in front of the comms screen.

"Well, well. Mark Baryx. I didn't expect to find you outside of the Academy." Rau said, stepping forward. The man on the screen seemed to be about twenty-five, wearing some kind of head-cover resembling a rag wrapped around the upper part of his head, above the eyebrows, and was wearing some kind of metallic body armor that covered him neck-to-toe.

"Rau Le Creuset. I still owe you for that little show back when I was training you and all those other hotshots back in 57." Baryx replied, sounding gruff. Everyone present looked quizzically at Rau.

"It was just after I escaped from the Abaddons. I joined the nascent ZAFT, and was assigned to Commander Baryx's training unit. During an exercise, I accidentally nicked Baryx's ZAMS with a burst from my rifle......this during a battle against several Moebius armors." Rau said, not seeming at all apologetic, just matter-of-fact.

"Saving me from a sneaky bastard who'd managed to get behind me." Baryx said, amused. "Well, anyway, I'm here to return the favor. You're being followed."

"Followed! By who?" Ramius barked, leaning forward.

"By us." The connection to Baryx's submarine was cut, and instead the crew saw a black-haired, blue-eyed girl, dressed in a tight-fitting jumpsuit and what looked like combat boots. Behind her was standing Edward Abaddon, and behind him, off to the right, was David Sariel.

Huh. She looks familiar. Liene thought, frowning as he studied the girl.

"Who are you!?" Ramius demanded, fingers gripping the arms of her chair.

"I, am Lena Abaddon. I have been tasked by the Admirals to-"

"Hi." Everyone swiveled to stare at Jack, who had an expression none had ever seen on him before. Most just chalked it up to bloodlust.

"What?" Lena asked, apparently annoyed at being interrupted, folding her arms over her (ample) chest and adopting an irritated expression.

"Oh, I just wanted to ask what your radio frequency was."

"Why in the world would you ever ask that?"

"Well, I know a few good restaurants, and I figured if either of us ever had an off day-" Edward Abaddon and Kira were the first ones to realize what was happening, and did what no one ever expected to happen.

They fell on the floor and laughed.

"HAAAHAHAHAAHAAHAHAHHAA" On and on. Lena was frozen, blush creeping up her cheeks while Sariel stood behind Abaddon, who was rolling on the floor, and tried not to laugh. People had died for less. On the Barachiel's bridge, Kira was clutching his sides, guffawing.

Furious, Lena snarled, and said: "You have one hour. Be ready." and cut the connection.

00000000000000000000000000000000000000000 -- Quis est a Iuguolo nisi a Iuguolo? – 00000000000000000000000000000000000000

A/N: Damn, that was unexpected. And I was the one writing it. I don't blame either of them for laughing though.

Infinite Freedom: Why do you guys think everything that would tick a normal person off would tick Kira off? Even in this darker form, Kira's kinder than most. Unless you're OMNI. Or you've threatened friends and family with bodily or mental harm. Then you're screwed.

Aunandaun: I thought that was why they had reviews.

G. Wagers: Well, it involved the enemy, just probably not in the way you expected.

Nxkris: thank you.

Velshard: …..waiting. And yes, I'm putting what we discussed into the plot.

Alright, enough with the 'filler', I need explosions, death, and general rampant destruction, K'GON!!!

("Yeah?")

Get me the Hellsing anime, God of War, and Phase 50 of Gundam Seed!

("Shit, you're watching Hellsing? Chimamare's gonna have some fun next phase....")

Knightmare Gundam of Ni

And before you ask, no, Mark Baryx is not from some other universe where guys walk around in heavy combat armor wearing do-rags. *glances about shiftily*