A/N: This could possibly be the most serious chapter thus far. It's got boring history explanations, mentions of torture, mild angst (which is kind weird since it's not even Filai doing the angsting), and shitty philosophy. I think my humor ability died off in this chapter, and since this story is kind of in the HUMOR genre, I obligingly tossed in an omake.

The family arc and future arc are all so serious planned out in my head, so I'll probably be resorting to omakes to keep the humor in. Meanwhile, you get to deal with Filai being the deadpan snark while being tortured. Self preservation is obsolete.

Chapter 13

Namimori, Sawada Residence

Once upon a time, there was a Mafia family called the Vongola. Then there was another Mafia family called the Viavideche. They were very good friends for centuries and centuries and centuries.

If "very good friends" had some hidden connotation of blood feuds and property raids and sporadic shootouts. Think Montague and Capulet. Only Mafia. With bombs and guns instead of skinny rapiers and bludgeons of archaic advancements.

Then there was the Vongola's valiant attempt to nuke the Viavideche's HQ (those who consider Gokudera Hayato explosive happy probably never knew Vongola 2nd very well), and the Viavideche's gratuitous effort to shoot down the Vongola 4th's ship while he was traveling to his successor's inheritance ceremony (cannons and Viavideche 8th made a very happy combination. If you were on his side, that is). And after all that is when we can talk about that ten year long war in which the two families completely duked it out in the most extravagant fashion ever.

The Viavideche never did quite forgive the Vongola for the curb stomp trashing they received that one time. Which was why after the war there was the centuries long cold war that—

"Is the main reason why Filai fell into Varia hands early on in her life." Reborn finished, busily shuffling through his photos before putting them back in his suit. "But that's irrelevant at the moment."

Tsuna twitched. "H-how did you have pictures from the 2nd's time era? Cameras shouldn't have been invented back then." Xanxus did look like the 2nd (strange, considering how they weren't even related). And the image of Xanxus happily watching people scream in horror as they were blown to smithereens wasn't something he wanted drifting around in his head.

"The Vongola have their ways." Reborn replied mysteriously.

Head hung in defeat, Tsuna muttered "So? What does all this have to do with Mukuro?"

The mist guardian's "vengeance" request had been unexpectedly simple. Deliver a letter to the 9th. And a free round trip ride to Italy, but that's irrelevant.

The missive had been utterly trap free, personally examined by Reborn. For convenience sakes, Tsuna had given it to his father, who, after dropping by back in Japan to check on his son's status, was returning to Italy anyways for his own business.

It was just too simple. Considering Mukuro's past agendas of final conquests and WWIII, Mafia style, you couldn't blame Tsuna for the bad feeling he was harboring in the back of his head.

"I'm not too sure of the details myself." The infant hitman admitted. "But before their alienation from the Mafia world, Mukuro Rokudo's original family, the Estraneo, were allied with the Viavideche. I can only assume Mukuro's vendetta has something pertaining to that."

"E-Estraneo?" Tsuna sputtered, horrified. "You mean that one family with all the child experiments? Filai san's family was with them?"

"Don't be surprised." Reborn said darkly. "The Viavideche is completely different from the Vongola and the Cavellone. Completely militaristic. They're widely regarded as one of the most violent families ever to exist, which explains their considerable influence despite their narrow scope."

Not crept out at all, Tsuna ventured a timid "So if they're so strong, then how did they lose to the Vongola so easily?"

Here, Reborn smirked smugly. "The Viavideche uses a different energy source from the Vongola. It's extremely powerful under normal circumstances, but when put in contact with Dying Will flames, it's almost completely useless, and the fact that it's pretty much connected to their life energy means that the user's health also suffers." He explained. "Filai's from the main family, so she's especially vulnerable."

"Eh, so that's why Xanxus and I almost indirectly killed her during the Sky battle?" Tsuna supplied tentatively.

"Pretty much."

Great, now he was going to go and feel very guilty. "But still! Filai san doesn't seem like the type who'd do something terrible like human experimentations!"

Sure, disregard the fact that she happened to be a biology fanatic with a profuse S+M fetish. Also ignore the fact that Squalo had been slightly afraid of waking up with his organs located in the wrong places ever since she showed him blueprints of the process. With his own body as the model.

Reborn rolled his eyes exasperatedly at his student's idiocy. "Filai may have blood connections to the Viavideche, but she was still a part of the Varia for a good part of life. She's not nearly as bad as the rest of them."

"S-so," Tsuna squeaked. "What if Filai goes back to her family? She'll turn even more violent?"

"I wouldn't worry so much about that." Reborn said nonchalantly, sipping his cappuccino. "Don't misunderstand her too much, Tsuna. Filai loves the Varia." Which made her a masochist by default, and no amount of denial was going to change that. "She'll never leave them."

Vongola HQ

"YOU WHAT?" Squalo all but shrieked, thrashing violently as 9th generation Lightning and Mist guardians bodily holding him back from slicing down the 9th right here and now.

Standing next to him, even Xanxus was looking a little pale as he glanced back at the utter destruction that his sharky subordinate had caused in his rampaging path of homicidal horrors. Maybe it wasn't too late to break his habits of throwing beer glasses at his head. Pause. He shook his head. No, it was definitely too late for that.

The Ninth winced as he clutched his ears. Squalo paused for a breath, and the 9th quickly said "Listen, Squalo. I know you're upset. But it was her own decision to go back, and—"

"YOU SENT HER BACK TO THE VIAVIDECHE." Squalo said, wide eyed with some lunatic anger of painful proportions. "ARE YOU INSANE? WE'RE AT FUCKING WAR WITH THOSE BASTARDS AND YOU GO AND YOU SEND HER—"

"There wasn't a choice otherwise!" The Ninth cut him off, exasperation heavy in his voice. "It was either she went back or—" He hesitated, and shook his head. He couldn't tell them that. "In any case, what's done is done, Squalo. I know it's painful, but she can't come back anymore."

Squalo grit his teeth. "I'll drag her back." He spat. "She can't fucking leave just like that. She's part of the Varia—"

"No she's not." The 9th said sharply. "After the Cradle Affair, Filia disappeared. You didn't file a report on her whereabouts, nor did you elaborate on her part in the coup. Consequentially, she was deemed deceased on official documentary, until I received reports from the head of the Cavellone family just recently. She was scheduled to go back eight years ago. She was never officially a part of the Varia, and I assure you, if she wanted to return, then I have no right to stop her."

They really shouldn't be talking about the Cradle Affair in front of Xanxus. As if the poor guy needed any reminder.

"But—" Squalo began, and sensing the futility of it all, groaned. "You seriously...did...not do her any favors by throwing her back into that freak house." He finally forced out, throwing his hands up in miserable defeat. "She's screwed. Fucked to shit, I tell you. God, the next time anyone sees her she'll probably be some unrecognizable walking corpse or some shit like that."

The 9th's brows furrowed in confusion at the swordsman's mutterings. "Squalo, I'm quite aware of the Viavideche's brutality, as you are. But I find it doubtful that even their boss would be so cruel as to harm his own child. Filia herself never mentioned any sort of abuse, am I correct?"

Squalo scowled, arms folding bitterly. "Voi, get to your point already."

"So what are you so worried about? I know there is some emotional attachment involved—"

"Finish that sentence and you'll be counting to cloud nine, you old shi—" Clicks sounded in the air. Squalo was unhappy. The gunpoint to the head was really getting old.

The 9th continued without missing a beat. "You seem nervous about something, Squalo." He said kindly. "If you want to tell me anything, I could help—"

Squalo twitched. "HE," He pointed a gloved finger at Xanxus, who blinked confusedly. "Is your fucking son. I'm your fucking son's damn slave. Get your identity facts straight, you old shit!" So even he knew that he was Xanxus' bitch. That was just pathetic. "And god damn it, nothing's wrong. I'm not nervous. What the fuck makes you think I'm nervous?" Squalo muttered, not at all nervously. Before the Ninth could respond, he snapped "I thought you wanted to see Xanxus."

"Well, yes, I do, but—"

"Then you can have fun with your damn family reunion. I'll wait outside." Turning heels, Squalo stormed out, slamming the doors shut behind him.

Fucking old fart. He rolled his eyes angrily as he leaned against the wall to wait for Xanxus. What 'nervous' shit was he talking about? The man was obviously hallucinating. Overdose on painkillers and all that. Fuck. It was just—

Not that he was going to miss her or anything. Not at fucking all. Emotional attachment was bullshit misconstrued, nothing fishy about it; just the 9th acting like Sawada Tsunayoshi Sr. after a soap opera marathon. It wasn't anything important. Just that...

It wasn't so much the 'she was gone' part that was disconcerting as it was the 'she was now with her family' issue. The Viavideche familia. Nothing good ever came out of those bastards. It wasn't a place where she should be. It wasn't healthy.

Squalo closed his eyes, a ditch attempt to fight the urge to hit his head on something hard.

Meanwhile, Viavideche Familia, HQ

"You're joking." Filai deadpanned.

"I'm completely serious."

She bristled. "No," She elaborated slowly, and generously, she thought, because most others wouldn't waste time repeating something that should've been understood the first damn time. "I don't think you understand me. You. Are. Joking. Whether you like it or not."

The man sitting in front of her was not at all what she had been expecting. Forget the fact that he had a seventeen year old daughter; the guy had a twenty six year old son, and yet didn't appear beyond his late thirties. She knew that members from the main family aged slightly slower than the average human, but this was just ridiculous.

Soma Primavera Viavideche, age 42. The 16th boss of the Viavideche crime empire.

Also, Filai's biological father. Who she never really met before now. She should've known something like this would've happened when she was called for immediately after her return, despite him never showing any interest in her before.

"No." She said flatly. "No way. No negotiations whatsoever."

Wearily sighing, Soma reached into his cabinet. "You seem a little flustered, Filia." He said kindly, pulling out a cigarette pack and offering it to her. "Would you like one?"

"I'm seventeen. You know, under aged." Filai said testily. Some parental influence he is. "And I don't like smoking." Even if I did, I'm not accepting that from the head of a family who poisons the candy they hand out on Halloween. Rumors circulate, alright?

"Never stopped me." He commented, lighting one for himself.

Yeah, just wait until you get cancer. Then we'll see who's laughing. Filai continued. "Anyways, have I sort of successfully conveyed my message of utter rejection at your proposal? Because if need be, I have other ways of doing it."

Completely unperturbed, he blew out a stream of smoke, pocketing his lighter casually. "Well, I was expecting the need for a bit of persuasion anyways, so—"

"I take that as a no." Filai cut him off irately, wondering how she could possibly be related to someone with such failed comprehension abilities, because what part of 'shut the fuck up and accept the fact that you're joking' didn't the man get? "So let me be a little more frank, if I may."

Soma waved a hand, mildly amused. "Be my guest."

And thus, with all the filial piety and devotion in the world to her avail, and of course, none to show, Filai kindly flipped him off. "Go rot in hell."

Back to the Vongola HQ

Speaking of filial piety...

Xanxus didn't believe his dad. He really, truly, didn't believe him. "Are you fucking trying to mock me?" He snarled, eyes flashing dangerously. The guns aimed at him pressed harder in warning, and he ignored them as he slammed his hands down on the Ninth's desk. "What kind of shit are you trying to pull here?"

Clearly expecting the reaction, the Ninth reached into a drawer, pulling out a thin black folder. "It's been settled already, Xanxus." He murmured tiredly, offering the folder to the enraged Varia boss, who snatched it rudely.

The old man wasn't kidding, Xanxus realized in disbelief. He almost had to laugh. "Outright acquittal of all the shit the Varia's pulled." He stated, scanning the documents. "Everything. From the Cradle Affair to the Ring tournament."

"That's pretty much it."

"Throwing you in a fucking ROBOT."

Pause. "Er, well, it was rather cushioned inside, so it wasn't that bad-"

Xanxus threw the folder back down on the desk. His eyes narrowed as they scanned his father coldly, and he leaned forward, hissing "You think I'm a fucking idiot? Even if you let family sentiment get the better of you, there's no way in hell the high echelons of the family would let me go like this."

"They've settled with the request of a promise of no other disturbances from you or the rest." The Ninth affirmed mildly.

He snorted. "Even Sawada Iemitsu? Without that bastard's consensus, you wouldn't be able to do jackshit—"

"Iemitsu has already placed his agreement."

Xanxus stared at his father for seconds. He wasn't lying. How was that possible? The Vongola's higher ups were full of assholes who would shoot someone for breathing the same air they did. How the hell did—

Something hit him. He froze as it all clicked in his head. Slowly, reluctantly, Xanxus withdrew, still eying the 9th warily. "So that's how you did it." He said. Of course, why didn't he think of it earlier? The timing was perfect, and it would've easily pacified the rest of the Vongola. At least, those who mattered. The Mafia head didn't reply. "Let me guess, it was Iemitsu who suggested it, wasn't it?"

A pause. "You're always so perceptive about the wrong things." The Ninth muttered, running a tired hand through his graying hair. "But no, it was from Iemitsu. He sent it to me via letter. I was actually rather surprised by the proposal. It didn't really seem like his usual speech..." He drifted off thoughtfully. "Keep it a secret, will you? You weren't supposed to find out either."

"I have a fucking right to know when my squad's being screwed with." Xanxus snapped rudely, and that was that.

Three Days Later, Viavideche Underground Prison Cells

It was that kind of sacrificial aftermath she was feeling right now.

The type where you'd agree to sacrifice one thing or another for your parents, or your siblings, or ex-wife who you honestly didn't give a shit about anymore but wanted to impress anyways. Take a bullet for them? Sure. Sacrifice an arm so they'll emerge with sanity unscathed? Great. Sell your organs to the black market so you can get that oh so expensive surgery that'll expand the average life about half a month? Sounds good.

Except, then the time will come when there is indeed a bullet rotting in your gut, or your arm bleeding on the ground, or your lungs and kidneys and heart circulating through the underground trade, and that would be when you get to contemplate the shitty natures of life.

But in fact, Filai did not find a bullet in her guts, or her arm lying decrepit on the ground, or her lungs and kidneys and heart being surgically removed without fucking anesthesia to stone her dead.

Nope, instead, she found herself cheerily locked in a fucking unsanitary prison cell in chains and shackles and manacles after going through a not so humane process of interrogation and blackmail and FUCK did she hate the world. That bastard took parental abuse to a whole new goddam level. The aftereffects were showing.

"No, it didn't hurt at all." She had irately informed the interrogators the second day, vision slightly blurred by blood and concussion effects, because she tended to get those kind of aftereffects when having something heavy dropped on her head.

Her sentence had remained unfinished. "Because the Varia could do better." Or "The Varia has more imagination than you shit heads." And "The Varia's cross-examination sessions are more impressive." "Squalo always wanted to teach me how to swim, and when I agreed, he almost drowned me." "Squalo tried to cook dinner once, and nearly killed off the entire squad. Bet you can't do that, bitch."

There was a shitload of things she could tack on, but didn't. Just thinking about it gave her a headache a whole lot worse than the crap the Viavideche could ever do to her.

Alright, maybe this was a little different from aforementioned sacrificial aftermath. Because in those cases, at least you knew what was coming. That yes, there is going to be a bullet coming to you, or a machete ready to slice your limbs to bits, or cookie cutters ready to dig out your kidneys to put on a slab of metal to wrap. And you knew it damn well what you signed up for.

If Filai recalled correctly, her deal with the 9th included returning to her own family permanently for her side of the bargain. Then he'd take care of his own promise and all will be well.

There was nothing in the deal about her dad being the fucking prick to end all pricks about things and threatening cooperation to destroy the Vongola, and then kind of putting her through the wringer when she rather bluntly told him no, and I'm sure you can imagine how that ended. And if you can't, well, why don't you check out Filai's X-ray scans right now and count how many broken bones are in there?

To be fair, it wasn't really the 9th's fault. Even he probably wouldn't have predicted the extremes to which the Viavideche would take to get what they wanted. Moral restrictions obviously had no place here.

She wouldn't have agreed to the proposal if she knew something like this was going to happen.

For the record, "this" wasn't referring to her injuries. Or her not so happy torture sessions, or her prison terms of indefinite years at the hands of her own parent. Those she could handle. For the Varia's ungrateful sake, those she'll take with minimal bitching.

"This" was referring to said parent's attempt to destroy the Vongola once and for all. And that apparently he needed her help to make it so. And that no, Filai signed up for this for (to be hopelessly saccharine) the Varia's sake and she wasn't about to sell them out along with Tsuna and Hibari and rest of the damn idiotic family just because her ribs were in pieces and her blood level was decreasing rapidly by the second, and her limbs were twisted in strange ways that couldn't be natural. Period.

Filai sighed, using her unbroken arm to brush blood from her forehead before it dripped into her eyes. Miraculously enough, she was rather grateful for all the miseries she's gone through, courtesy of Squalo as her makeshift guardian for half her life. Pain resistance was being very useful at the moment. Thank you, daily Varia abuse.

Didn't change the fact that life sucked royal shit.

Maybe telling the head of one of the most barbaric Mafia families in existence (who was not at all accustomed to being dissed with such unique choices of language) to go fuck off wasn't the smartest idea in the world.

Pause. Abusive parent's dumbstruck expression came to mind.

Oh to hell with self preservation. It was totally worth it. But for the record, the Varia's "what the mind fuck" reactions were much nicer to look at. Especially Squalo's—

Filai internally wilted. It was official. She hated the world.

Meanwhile

"So you mind explaining to me how she managed to convince seven of my best interrogation (AKA torture) supervisors to quit, and another eight to voluntarily turn themselves into the police within a time span of three days?" Soma inquired curiously, more amused than irritated as three men squirmed uncomfortably in front of him.

His nameless subordinates exchanged dumb looks. "Some of them kind of got scared off," One admitted.

"They had to be given therapy." Another nameless subordinate piped up. "They kept rambling about how they've lost their purposes in life. Uh, thanks to your daughter's version of Aesop's fables, I think." Which was strange, since he was quite sure fables didn't include killer toilets or man eating pencil sharpeners.

Pause. "Oh, and there were a few who became chronically depressed. Apparently your daughter spent every chance she got going into lengthy details about how they fail at life and that's why they'll turn into crabby old bastards because they never get laid." Nameless minion three chirped helpfully.

"With a lot of references to the human reproductive system."

"And pictures."

"She seems to be able to pull out a biology book no matter how many times we take them away." Silence. Shudder. "It's scary."

And that, my dear friends, is why torturing someone who's lived through trigger happy folks and evil sharks and killer android kids and perverted tonfa wielders and psychopathic Mafioso prisoners and ironing gloves and killer poles and caffeine addiction was always an effort wasted.

Airplane ride, from Japan to Italy (courtesy of the Vongola)

"You're not going contact that person yet, Mukuro sama?" Chrome asked timidly. If Mukuro wasn't in a spiritual realm, then he probably wouldn't have heard her voice over Ken's happy prancing. Yes, Mafioso prisoners didn't get many chances of riding in first class private jets. Go figure.

Mukuro shook his head, mind practically overflowing with the plans for his delicate operation of sweet vengeance. So far, everything was moving along with complete perfection. Filai should have entered the Viavideche's HQ by now, and it'd be a simple matter of manipulating her to enter the records library stored somewhere in that fortress. With her blood status, it would be an easy matter for her to gain access to the more secretive areas of the archives.

Sawada Tsunayoshi's naivety had been played to his advantage. Mukuro found little difficulty in persuading the boy to slip in an unopened letter into his father's luggage. Upon discovery, the contents would've been inevitably brought to the Ninth, whose soft heart was no doubt searching for a way to ease the punishments on his son, as well as a method of appealing the rest of the Vongola who were not so politely crying for Xanxus' blood.

The letter had contained a simple and elegant proposal that would satisfy virtually everyone. It would save the Ninth much grief, and simultaneously offer an alternative appeasement to the other higher officials of the family. Filai, with her silly emotional attachments to the assassination squad, also would've had no objections accepting it.

All was perfect. Just perfect. And now the girl was back in her original home, the last of his pawns finally set in place for him, ready for usage. And disposal.

But before all that came, he had to make a little detour.

Estraneo's Former HQ

"Yeesh, this place is as gross as ever." Ken shuddered as they traveled through the ruins of their old home. Mukuro had decided to spare Chrome the nightmarish images, and swapped places with her. They walked in silence, save the echos of debris crushed under their feet as they made their way through the decrepit hallways.

Skeletons were still scattered around, some wearing decrepit lab coats with dried blood still stained on the fabrics.

They were all tense. Mukuro didn't blame them. Bad memories and all that. Every once in a while, they'd come across a smaller set of bones, sometimes limbs missing, protruding in wrong areas. Deformed and scattered, dumped near trash like broken dolls.. The last vestiges of old companions in suffering. Most had already been unrecognizable before they died, mad tests and experiments turning them into gruesome things.

Down two stories, they passed by the rusted experimentation rooms. Machinery of bestiary size lined the walls. Some still contained corpses, others just traces of severed limbs. Almost all were splattered and crusted with dried blood.

"What's wrong, Ken?" Chikusa murmured quietly as his friend stiffened.

Ken immediately looked down, fists clenching angrily. "N-nothing, pyon." He gritted out, furiously kicking at a piece of debris. "It-it's just, that was my room. Where they put the..." He trailed off, eyes faltering. Forced injections, every day, second, while their bodies were overloaded with substances that should've never been created. Ken turned earnestly to Mukuro. "We're gonna kill those bastards, right, Mukuro san?"

Laughing lightly, Mukuro waved a casual hand behind him. "Death wasn't quite what I had in mind, actually." He said as they headed towards the next set of stairs leading towards the depths of the basement. Where their objective was waiting. "I was planning something a little more painful, if you don't mind."

They were both eager for blood, he could sense. Ken and Chikusa.

It was at the fifth floor where Mukuro slowed to a stop. Behind him, Ken and Chikusa gazed at his back questioningly. "Something wrong, Mukuro san?"

He didn't answer for a moment, eyes fixated emptily on the contents barely visible through a slightly ajar door. That deathtrap mechanism was still there. Of course it was. Machinery didn't rot nearly as efficiently as he would've preferred. Those shackles, broken at the end. The tubes still hanging from the equipment.

Faintly, he could see erratic scratches on the metal armrests. He remembered those, remembered his nails digging into the cold surface as he was killed over and over again in that chair. As if clinging hopelessly for someone to save him. Fairies and pixies helping good children, Santa Claus giving them an early present in the form of freedom from this hell on Earth.

Fanciful tales getting the better of him back then. Such delusions only made things worse. Nothing ever came, and all he had to look at when he regained consciousness was the broken and bleeding nails coating his fingertips.

"-kuro san? Mukuro san?" Chikusa's voice jerked him out of his thoughts.

"Oops, drifted off a little." Flashing a rather quick smile, Mukuro gestured forwards. "Shall we continue?"

Exchanging worried looks, Ken and Chikusa obligingly hurried after him.

Mukuro's eyes narrowed as they rounded the last set of stairs. Humans were those kinds of monsters, after all. Selfish, consumed by avarice, just like that silly infant from the Varia. Expecting help from any of them was an effort wasted.

Underground level six. It had been the most secure floor in the entire building. Wind and water couldn't hope to leak in, even after all these years. The Estraneo's archives; every single action of terror the family has committed, made paper and ink. It was by far the most expansive room, and the shelves stretched on and on with seemingly no end. Mukuro smirked humorlessly. It was an appropriate size.

"Start looking." He said, leisurely reaching over to open a cabinet drawer. Files overflowed. "Find anything pertaining to the alliance with the Viavideche. Financial records, trade agreements, letters. In fact I want anything with just the name."

Mukuro watched as Ken and Chikusa scuttering into action. They were never ones for patience, and soon papers and files were scattered all over the air and the floor.

He had saved himself that time, years ago. That had only been the first half of his retribution, an unfinished masterpiece, and after all these years, he could achieve completion. It'll be his magnum opus. Really, it will. Blood and guts spilling, and all that. The usual routine.

Three days. Three days, and the Viavideche can go bye fucking bye to life.

Oh, life was just such a pretty thing sometimes. Kufufufu.

Meanwhile, Prison cell

In which Filai cracked and decided to finish a sentence properly.

"THE VARIA CAN DO BETTER THAN YOU FUCKING SODS." She called benevolently as men in white medical coats wheeled out another nigh hysterical interrogator. The latest in the long run. "I guarantee the fucker won't ever be able to see another highlighter without diving into the nearest sewage entrance."

The Viavideche weren't really making much progress with her.

Omake

Fifteen year old, post health class Squalo's theory on women (AKA reason 101 why he doesn't mind being Xanxus' bitch nearly as much as he should): "I'm not going to fucking trust somethingthat can bleed for five days straight without dropping dead."

Ten year old, ignorantly pre-puberty Filai blinked. "Females can do that?" Then. "I want to go try it." She scuttered off to the kitchen in search for a cooking knife, and Squalo almost didn't realize in time just what the fuck had happened.

Later, Lussuria's shrill voice rang out "Squalo! What did you say to poor Fifi? She's been awfully suicidal recently. Or is it masochism? I usually can't tell the difference when it comes to her, but she looked a little too happy to be normal." Clatter. Crash. CRACK. Silence. Ten seconds later, Luss sighed. "I'll go call the ambulance."

Squalo feigned much apathy.

Xanxus threw a beer glass at his head.

A/N: It all turned so serious on me. I'm feeling rather disturbed. OBEY YOUR WRITER, YOU EVIL FANFICTION! (shot)

The scene with Mukuro and co. has got to be the darkest bit in the entire fanfiction (which isn't saying much, but meh). I know he's probably not the angsting type, but the fact that his purpose in life is to take over Tsuna's body and destroy the world does earn him many evil points.

Now I'm kind of wondering if anyone got it clear on what was the proposal the 9th offered her. If nobody did (cause everything's scattered all over the place), don't worry. Everything will be explained sooner or later. Until then, you're all welcome to guess/wonder/throw a cactus at me because it's shit obvious.

Oh, and crap, I got so many review this time! Thank you all! I'm thinking the chapter after the next will be the beginning of the future arc, which is probably why it seems like I'm trying to rush everything. In any case, look forward to it!