Warnings and disclaimers: First chapter

Day 2: Adopted!

The King was solemn when he arrived at our favorite blondes' house, Merlin in tow with a particularly exasperated look on his face. Wondering what was wrong with him, they let them pass and closed the door. Arthur sat down, sighing dramatically.

"I need you to swear that you won't breathe a word about what I am about to tell you." They nodded while Merlin snorted and rolled his eyes. "This is a matter of state, and a rather delicate one." He carefully checked the door and the windows for eavesdroppers, eyed suspiciously at the cupboard and took a deep breath. "I am adopted!"

After several seconds of silence, "I'm sorry, what?

"Think about it. It makes perfect sense! Every Pendragon I've met has been evil, a psychopath or a weird mix of those. Why else would all of them betray me?"

"Because you are a prat."

"This is not funny, Merlin. I can't believe Uther lied to me all those years. When I think about my real parents, missing me... What do I do? If someone finds out I am not a Pendragon, I'll have to give up my rights to the crown!"

"Go figure." Tristan said, not sure if he should laugh or be angry. Really, royalty...

"It is not because of that... which it is. The next in line is Morgana, I took her throne. No wonder she is such a... a..."

"manipulative witch?" Isolde said.

"stuck-up chick?" Tristan offered, and she smacked him on the arm.

"smirking, childish, supercilious villain?" Merlin finished, and shrugged to the couple. Isolde began to feel the beginnings of a nasty headache.

"Arthur, I know you are still feeling hurt because of your uncle's betrayal, but really, that is not enough to think that you are adopted of all things."

"I couldn't be more different from them! I'm not evil!" Arthur moaned.

"I've seen you train your knights, and I've heard them after that saying that you are evil." She retorted.

"I'm not nuts."

"You set to reconquer the city with just a handful of men, you went against an immortal army with five and you faced a dragon one on one. On the contrary, you are quite insane."

"I... I'm blond!"

"Morgause was blonde too." All three glared at the secret warlock. "What? If Morgana is Morgause's half-sister and Arthur is Morgana's half-brother, then Morgause is Arthur's quarter-sister, obviously. And she was blonde, evil and had been dropped on the head one time too many as a kid."

"Well, all of them tried to kill my father. How do you explain that?"

"You tried that too, remember? And by that rule, half of the magical community would be related to Uther." Arthur moaned and slammed his head against the table. After a few moments though, he looked up and smiled.

"I see. I am not adopted. How could I have been so stupid!"

"Glad we agree on something, sire." That earned the servant a whack in the head. "I just don't know who my father is."

"Excuse me?"

"Well, it's not like Uther has never lied about something like that. And Morgana is just a year older or so than me. I can see it now… He married my mother for convenience, then they both found true love… and one thing lead to another… and-"

"We don't need to hear it." Tristan deadpanned.

"I need to find him! I can't live with this doubt any longer! Let's see, he must have been living in the castle… Gaius?"

"Arthur! He could be your grandfather!"

"… Leon?"

"For goodness' sake, he was seven when you were born."

"Look, if, and I'm just saying 'if', it were true, why would he still be in Camelot? Uther didn't seem like the kind of man to let something like that slide… uh oh." Isolde stopped trying to reason with the King when his face frowned in concentration. That wasn't good.

"Merlin, you are younger than me."

"Yes?"

"And you like me in a totally bromantic way."

"Uh… I guess?"

"And you never met your father!"

"Wait a minute here, you're not-"

"Why else would you be so annoying to me? It is obvious that our father came to Camelot because the King called him with the excuse of making peace. Then he betrayed and banished him and he had to flee to Ealdor, and he started a new life but Uther pursued him and he had to flee again before even knowing he had two sons! I'm so glad I found you, little brother!"

Now that was the last straw. Merlin went pale, then his face changed to red and then he began shouting at Arthur for ten minutes straight about the insensitive moron that he was, and that destiny might as well be blind – no one quite understood that part – and that he was going to chew Kilgarrah's out before storming out and slamming the door shut behind him.

"Poor boy, he is in denial."

After that, Arthur casually left the house, leaving behind two very bewildered smugglers. The episode did have a good side, however, since soon after that no blond, evil, slightly crazy sorcerer would ever attempt to take the King's life again. Not if they didn't want to have nightmares about a grown man chasing after then while whining and calling them 'daddy'.