And, here we go, another nice chapter for you nice people.

Disclaimer: See chapter one, plus, the title of this chapter is from RIhanna's Unfaithful.

Chapter 14: He's more than a man

Sebastian thought he had earned himself a raise. Within three days, he had killed Christian, Harry, Joshua and Joel, even managing taking his time to properly torture them before sending them to hell. Especially with Joel, he had taken his sweet time, knowing that this guy had been one of the leaders. He had tortured him not only for fun, but also for information on what they had done to Jim. And Joel had caved in easily. He had spilled everything, in the most colourful details, just to save his sorry ass from dying. Of course, Sebastian had killed him, nevertheless. Slit his throat. And then he had gone outside, lit up a cigarette, and shed a few tears. He did what Jim couldn't do.

But the moment he had knocked out Matthew Durkan, he felt better again. Matthew Durkan, the one who had initiated the rape. No wonder Jim wanted him for the great finale. Sebastian had to hold himself back or he would have beaten the man to death right there and now. Instead, he brought him back to the country house and called Jim. Then he prepared Durkan. He strapped him to a table, naked, with arms and legs bound to the four legs of the table. He then watched him while smoking a cigarette. Matthew was in fact quite a handsome man. Brown hair, blue eyes, the build of a swimmer, flawless body. It calmed Sebastian a bit, that, at the very least, the man who had done this to his boss wasn't some disgusting and ugly thug. It didn't change a thing, though. Matthew would still die tonight. And God knew what Jim wanted to do with him before the sweet oblivion of death occurred.

Jim arrived an hour after Sebastian had called him. Matthew was still out cold. Jim remained standing next to him, just looking, not saying a word. Sebastian watched him, wondering what was going through his mind. But when suddenly Jim's eyes narrowed and filled with hatred, Sebastian knew it. Jim was reliving it, reliving the probably most humiliating hours of his life. Sebastian could see Jim's fingers tightening into a fist, knuckles white. Right hand. The ring finger on his left hand was still damaged, and he couldn't move it properly. Sebastian could see Jim was shaking, but he left him alone. It wasn't the pain that made him shake, it was anger, hatred, and Sebastian knew he shouldn't interrupt that or he would probably end up with a blackened eye. So he just waited patiently, preparing his tools.

Suddenly Jim murmured, "We are amateurs, Sebbie."

"Are we?" Sebastian frowned. "How come?"

"I can't think of nothing that I could do to him that would come even close through what I've suffered."

"We could do to him what he did to you, Jim." Sebastian said. "I volunteer. I will tear this guy's ass apart until his guts come out of it."

Jim sighed, "I appreciate that, Sebastian. But it's not enough. It's not good enough. Nothing we can do to him will ever give me the satisfaction I crave. Nothing will wipe away the pain, the shame…" His eyes were empty when he continued, "This is so frustrating."

"I'm sorry, Jim." Sebastian understood what he meant. "What do you want me to do?"

Jim shrugged, "I don't care. Really, I don't. It won't change a thing. Just… give me the shears."

Sebastian handed them over to him, "What do you want to do? Cut it off?"

Jim shook his head, "No. He would die too soon, and even though I cannot get satisfaction out of killing him, it doesn't mean I will kill him in a heartbeat. No…" He walked around the table. "You know what he said, when he broke my finger? 'So that you will always remember us when you're getting married.' That was their plan. I should always remember them. They wanted me to feel bad. Even on my wedding day, the day that is supposed to be the happiest day in a person's life. They couldn't know I never intended to get married. They just wanted to give me a pang of pain even on that day. I should never be happy again." He walked to the head of the table, where Matthew's left hand was. "He is already married. Nice ring. I think I'll send his wife this finger." And without any hesitation, he placed Matthew's left ring finger between the shears and pushed. The blood oozed freely from the wound, but Jim didn't even react when it sprayed on his trousers and shirt, or when Matthew's unconscious body jerked. He just picked up the finger from the floor and looked at it. "I guess his wife won't think of her marriage the same way again ever." He walked over to a table and placed the finger there. "Now I feel a bit better." He leaned against the table. "You have any ideas? On what to do?"

Sebastian sighed, "A lot. But I have to tell you, they won't bring you any satisfaction, either."

Jim nodded slowly, "I know. Yet, I think it needs to be done. If only so I can make a statement."

Sebastian took care of the wound, and then both waited until Matthew woke up. He stirred at first, but then suddenly started moaning. Jim motioned Sebastian to remain in his armchair, and walked over to the table. "Hullo, Matthew. Remember me?"

Matthew turned his head and rested his eyes on Jim's face. His speech was slurry when he said, "I do."

"Anything you would like to say? Or is the pain too much now?"

Matthew shook his head, "I have nothing to say."

Jim smirked a bit, "Well, I made Nancy York talk. And I heard from my friend Sebastian over there that Joel was very talkative too."

Matthew sighed, "I feared they were dead." Then he looked back at the ceiling. "Well, what do you want me to tell you? That I am sorry for what I've done? I'm not. You are scum, Moriarty. You didn't deserve any better. I wouldn't have done what I did to you if you had talked. But I have a family to protect, and I don't regret a single thing."

Jim leaned against the table, "Yeah, I know. Your wife will get a special present from me. If you haven't noticed by now, you're missing a finger."

Matthew nodded, "I thought so. Let me tell you one thing, Moriarty. You can be happy it was only you. That you have nobody else. We were actually planning on bringing in somebody you love. Never found anybody. So it had to be you. But I tell you, the worst torture is not what you went through. It's seeing somebody you love go through it."

Sebastian had to admit he had a point. He asked, "Do you want me to shut him up, boss?"

Jim shook his head, "No, let him talk. I am intrigued. So, you think it would hurt you more if I brought your wife and children in? Because, really, I can do that. Sebastian here knows where you live. I could play you a tape, let you hear how they scream. Remember, you tried and do that to me."

Matthew looked at him, "This is between you and me, Moriarty. Don't take it out on my family. I beg you."

Jim smiled, "Begging me, are you? You know what? I think I will leave your family alone. Apart from the finger of course, you cannot talk me out of that. My future wife, if I ever happen to find a woman that doesn't feel uncomfortable around me, will see what you have done to my finger, too, so I guess we're even." He tilted his head, "You could thank me for that, you know?"

Matthew bit his lip, but then murmured, "Thank you. I really appreciate that."

Jim patted his cheek, "Yeah, I am nice. But that will not stop me from making you suffer till your last breath. I think you will understand that. After all, I know that was what you wanted to do to me, too, wasn't it? Exactly, when did it stop being an interrogation for you? Because, really, I could see in your eyes that at some point you only wanted to hurt me, even if you pretend you did it all to protect your family."

Matthew seemed to really think about it, "I think when Joel brought you out of the isolation cell. When you crawled into the room, I thought, 'This is it, now we broke him'. But you, you were still cocky, still arrogant. Just exhausted. Even when we showed you your face in the mirror. You were shocked, I could see that. But you didn't cave in, and it was so frustrating. At this point, the only thing I wanted was to break you, shatter you. I think that's when it changed."

Jim nodded, "I see. Well, I didn't. When did you think rape would do the trick, then?"

Sebastian flinched at the word, but Matthew answered, "After the chili incident. Remember when I told you what would help against the pain? Cum? I think for a moment I saw the real 'you' there. You were afraid, weren't you? I saw it. I said it only because I wanted to see your reaction, and you reacted the way I wanted. We agreed we would do it shortly after we left you. And yes, I was the leading man." Then he asked, "Are you going to do it to me, too?"

Jim shook his head, "No. You see, I will kill you tonight. So, it doesn't make sense to rape you, at least not for me. And I don't do things that don't make sense. No, I will not rape you. Can't speak for Sebastian though." He motioned over to Sebastian who was waiting in the corner. "Right now, I just want you to go through so much pain that you will beg for death. And even that won't be enough, if I am honest." He sighed, "Nothing I can do will be enough to properly pay you back for what you have done to me."

Sebastian cleared his throat, "What if you let him live, then?"

Jim frowned, "What do you mean? I never let people live. This is absurd."

"Let's go outside for a second. He won't run away any time soon."

Outside, Jim leaned against the wall, "Explain yourself."

"You know even his death cannot give you the satisfaction you want. What if you just torture the shit out of him and let him live? So he will spend a lifetime coping with what has happened. I think that is the closest you can come to actual satisfaction." He took a breath, "James, I have to tell you that the man is right. The worst thing you can put a human being through is torturing somebody they love."

"So you tell me to go after his family? You know that's not my line…"

"I know. But think like this. You torture Matthew and let him go. His wife will see what has happened to him. She will hurt. It's what lovers do. He will see that, he will see how what has happened to him will hurt her. And consequently, he will hurt even more because the one person he loves hurts. You could destroy his life like that."

"That sounds all very… theoretical."

Sebastian chuckled, "It's because you never had to go through it, see somebody you love being broken. But I can tell you: it's the real thing."

"You sound like you have been through that."

"I'm going through it right now." When Jim frowned, he added, "I owe my life to you, Jim. Without you, I would be dead now. I know it's not exactly love, but, as for me, the feelings I have for you are stronger than what I've ever felt for any woman. And to see you like this hurts me more than if they had done it to me. I would have happily volunteered to take your place in that bloody cell, and I would still do now, even though I know what has happened. If you want him to suffer just as much as you do, and possibly more, this is the route you have to take."

Jim watched Sebastian; his chief of staff and favourite sniper was not a man of many words. Sebastian preferred action over talking. This was the second time since Jim had come back that Sebastian had uttered so many words. And he seemed genuine. And he was right, Jim noticed. He had been working with Sebastian now for about five years. During this time a friendship had been forged, a relationship that was far more than a simple employer-employee relation. Jim trusted Sebastian with his life, and Seb had proved more than once that he was worth it. And although Jim had tried to fight any feelings, he knew that, should anything ever happen to Sebastian, he would be devastated. Then he thought of Sebastian's words. Jim had never loved anyone. He hadn't been capable, after having been disappointed so many times when he was a child. But he had a very clear idea of what love meant, and, if he continued thinking about it, he would probably see that Sebastian was right. He looked into Sebastian's eyes. Sebastian had come closest to what Jim considered as love. And knowing Seb was hurt because Jim was hurt… He shook his head. No. I can't think about that. And what if it had indeed been Sebastian instead of him? Can't think about that, either. He's right. This is the route I would have to take to feel better.

So he said, "We'll let him go. Go in there, knock him out, and bring him home."

That was the last thing Sebastian had expected, "What?"

"You heard me."

"Sure I did, but, why?"

Jim had already turned on his heel, but he stopped in his tracks, "Because you are right. I could destroy him like that. But he's not the one I want destroyed. He's not worth it. He will always live with the knowledge that I could have killed him, that I could have tortured him, but that I haven't done it. I guess that's good enough, seeing how he thinks I am scum. Give him something to remember me by, though." He walked away, murmuring, "To think they could have done this to you, Bastian... I'll be outside."

Sebastian watched him as he opened the door and walked up the stairs. He had heard the underlying meaning of Jim's last sentence. Jim had understood it. Of course, with a brain like his, why wouldn't he? But Sebastian also understood. Understood that Jim cared for Sebastian more than he showed. And that beneath the surface Jim was very well capable of feeling hurt. That he hadn't tortured Matthew because he himself found it hard to deal with the pain his own suffering caused for his most loyal servant… his friend. And that, as hard as it was to believe for some people, James Moriarty had in fact a heart. And it was this little feature of him that made James Moriarty the greatest man alive. At least to Sebastian Moran.

Surprise! Well, after this chapter, there's only the epilogue left. I have an idea for a new fic, though I'm not sure whether you guys are even interested in it, cos, there'll be an OC. Lemme know. Don't worry, there'll be some Jim whump as well. ;)