Thanks everyone for the reviews.
A Mind That Sits Still-Trust me on this...Aiden is dead. And I love disney movies Beauty and The Beast is my fave :)
Acurcuru- Hey you never know. Someone could say something bad. I wouldn't mind. I like a little constructive criticism. Thanks.
PurpleLover92 - Christine is nasty. You will find out about Ashley's unsureness in this chapter. I don't know about shit hitting the fan. At least not yet anyway ;)
FriendlyGirl333- Yes! I know exactly how exciting it is to see an update on a story. I am a ff reader too. You don't have to be my slave..lol. Just keep reading and reviewing :)
noodles307- I know I want a beach house like that too. And no worries...there is A LOT of story left to tell here :)
momo0424- It was one of my favorite chapters too. As a reader and a writer. Thanks :)
naranga87- You had me at "Wow!" lol. Hope you enjoy this chapter you my cheeky lady friend ;)
lisarichie- Glad I could make you smile. Hope I can continue to :)
bobo02- Yes thank God the evil witch is gone. I am going to try to keep up with the touching Spashley scenes. Hope you enjoy the next chapter. :) Thanks.
I own nothing but my imagination along with Miranda, Casey and Alyssa.
This chapter is Rated M.
We were almost home and I stopped walking and pulled her into me. I kissed her softly and pressed my forehead to hers. Then I took her hand and placed it on my skin right above my heart.
"You feel that? That's all you. You have my heart Spence." I whispered. Our foreheads still pressed together.
Then I took my other hand and caressed her cheek before sliding it down passed her neck and between her breasts. I held my hand just above her heart.
"Please tell me I have yours too." My voice was a little shaky. A little scared.
She took both of her hands and cradled my face. She kissed me gently and then pressed her forehead to mine.
"You do." She whispered back
Those two words affected me more than anything ever has. I never thought I would fall in love let alone someone would fall in love with me. She had my heart and that was scary because that meant it was hers for the breaking as well. I did everything but hand it over to her on a silver platter. The moment I locked eyes with hers my heart no longer belonged to me. It belonged to her. It only beat for her.
Knowing now that I had her heart was equally if not more scary. I had been a fuck up most of my life. I was terrified that if I had the chance to love someone I would just end up hurting them because I just don't know how to not be miserable. I let my mother's thoughts of me become my own. I let myself believe I didn't deserve happiness. I didn't deserve to love or be loved. I didn't know how to love. I could never be someone that one could fall in love with.
She was wrong. I was wrong. I have never been so happy to be wrong. I was so in love with Spencer. I loved making her happy. I loved making her smile. I loved making her laugh. I loved making her blush. I loved making her heart race. It was all so effortless. It was natural. Loving her is what I was meant to do. I truly believe that. If there was such a thing as fate. It was us. My mother and her thoughts could go fuck themselves. Sorry.
"Where are you Ash?" Spencer asked. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah" I laughed. "Just thinking."
After our long overdue confessions we sat down in the sand. I held her tight in front of me. Neither one of us wanted to let this night end.
"You seem to do a lot of thinking when we are together. Am I that boring?" She joked.
"No Spence. Not at all. I'm just not used to all of this. I'm a little overwhelmed." I buried my face in her neck and kissed it.
"We're in this together Ashley. I'm scared to you know. You need to talk to me. I want to know what's going on in that beautiful mind of yours." She turned her head and kissed me softly.
"I want to talk to you about it Spence but not right now. I just want to sit here with you and enjoy this moment." I pulled her by the back of her head and kissed her. This kiss a lot deeper than any of the others we shared tonight.
We crept up the stairs careful to not wake my dad and Miranda. It was nearly 2am. When we got to my door I pulled Spencer into my room.
"Ash I should go to my room." She whispered.
"What? No. Why?" I didn't want to let her go.
"I'm tired and I need to get some sleep." She explained.
"You can sleep with me Spence. I promise I will be good." I walked up to her slowly and grabbed her hand pulling her closer to me. "I promise. We'll just sleep."
"But I can't promise that Ashley. I don't know if I can control myself if I get in that bed with you." She admitted. It was dark in the room but I could see her face redden.
"I see." I pull her closer and hold her by her hips. "I want you too Spence. I want every part of you." I tilted my head and kissed her. Not softly this time. Nope. My hands still on her hips I push her against the door. She whimpered. I stopped.
"I'm sorry. Did I hurt y.." I didn't get to finish because her lips were on mine and her tongue was desperately searching for mine. Her hands were in my hair keeping me close. I reached my hands around to her behind and lifted her up. She wrapped her legs around me and the feeling of her center against mine caused a loud moan to escape from my throat. The kisses got hungry and needy and sloppy. We were devouring each other's mouths. I left her mouth and trailed open mouth kisses down her neck. I heard a thud and looked up to see Spencer's head hit the back of the door. Her mouth wide open and her eyes closed. It was turning me on the way she was reacting to my touch. I bit down on her neck lightly and then licked up to her ear. I nibbled on the lobe and then flicked my tongue across it. Her body was rested on my hips and I trailed my hands up her sides under her shirt. She shivered and moaned quietly. "Take it off." She begged. I didn't think twice. I lifted her shirt from the bottom and pulled it up over her head. Staring down at Spencer in her red laced bra sent my hormones into overdrive. I attacked her mouth again and instantly found her tongue sucking it slowly. I let out a little whimper of my own. My hands were running up and down her arms slowly. They made their way up to her shoulders and slowly pulled her bra straps down. I kissed her chin and then licked down her neck and then softly kissed her shoulder letting my tongue slip out to taste her skin. I couldn't wait any longer to taste the skin lower so I looked at Spencer for approval. She was staring at me. Blue eyes now very dark. Mouth still open. She nodded. I wasn't at a good angle so I moved us over to the bed and set her down on the edge. Then I kneeled down on the floor in front of her. I looked up at her one last time and her facial expression hadn't changed. I ducked my head and kissed the top of her breast. Her hands found my hair again and she pulled me closer. I kissed the top of her other breast and then made my way slowly down with more soft kisses. Her nipples were hard and begging to be touched. I hovered over her left breast and slipped my tongue out grazing the nipple over the lace. She threw her head back again and gripped my hair tighter. I did the same with the other nipple. I slowly reached around and un-did her bra. She dropped her arms and let it slide down them. I pulled back so I could take in the view. My breathing stopped as I stared at her perfect breasts. I look back to Spencer's eyes. They were looking back at me full of lust and something else I had never seen before when in this position.. Love. I caressed her cheek and then traced her lips with my fingers.
"You're so beautiful Spence." I leaned in and kissed her lips softly. Then with one hand on each breast I rolled her nipples under my fingers. She moaned and leaned back propping herself up with her hands. I lowered my head and took a nipple into my mouth. She jerked back and moaned a little louder this time. I was so turned on and I could start to feel the wetness between my legs. Holy fuck this woman was so damn sexy when she moaned. I swirled my tongue around her hard nipple and then bit down gently. She jerked again and I let go. I moved over and did the same with the other breast causing the same reaction. Her center grinded up against mine and she moaned out my name. I lost what little control I still had. I pushed her down onto the bed and climbed on top of her. I looked down at the beauty below me. Her blonde hair was sprawled out over the bed. Her bare chest rising and falling while she panted. Her mouth slightly open and usually crystal blue eyes dark as night. I took both of her hands and put them over her head and lowered my head back to her breasts. Taking my time I licked and sucked on each nipple before making my way slowly down her stomach. I let go of her hands and they found my hair right away. She pulled my head back up to her. My mouth found hers again and I moaned into it. She lowered her hands from my head and trailed them down my back and rested them on the back of my thighs. She gripped onto them and pulled me into her center. We both moaned loudly into each other's mouths and I bit her lip in reaction. No inner dialogue interrupting this time. I wanted her so bad and I was not about to stop for anything. My hands left the breast I was caressing and trailed slowly down her smooth stomach. I reached for the button of her jeans and she jumped.
"Wait!" She said. "Damn it." She said out of breath .She covered her face with her hands.
"Spence are you okay?" I moved her hands from her face.
"I'm sorry. I want this. I do. I want you. All of you." She said quickly.
"But…" There was a but coming.
"I'm not ready for that yet. I want it to be special. More special." She moved to sit up and I climbed off of her. I walked over and picked up her shirt off the floor. I came back to the bed and handed it to her before sitting back down next to her. I looked away as she put it back on.
She looked at me sadly and grabbed my hands.
"I'm really sorry Ashley. I shouldn't have let it get that far. You just…God the way you touch me." She looked away embarrassed.
"Spence don't." I reached my hand up to her face and pulled it back to face me.
"It's okay. I probably shouldn't have gone that far." I paused. "I want it to be perfect too. And even though this place is beautiful it's not perfect. My dad and Miranda are right down the hall. So I am sorry. I just couldn't stop."
"I didn't want you to stop. I told you I wouldn't be able to control myself. Looks like you had the same problem." She laughed.
"I wouldn't call it a problem. You are so damn sexy Spencer. I've wanted you since the moment I laid eyes on you." I admitted.
"I know. Trust me I wanted you too and that was soooo confusing. You're so beautiful Ash. And sexy. And sweet. And amazing in every way." She kissed me softly while she ran her fingers down my cheeks.
"I'm going to go to my room and take a shower. A coold shower." She laughed.
"Yeah I should probably take one too." I slid out of the bed and helped her off of it. "Are you going to come back?" I asked.
She didn't answer right away. She was debating with herself. "I don't know if I should. But…I will." She kissed me again.
"Good. I promise this time I will be good." I chuckled.
She left and I jumped into the shower. I spent a lot more time than I should of in there. I was in desperate need of a release. The burning and aching in my lower body needed to be 'taken care of' before I got back into bed with Spencer.
After putting on a pair of pajama shorts and a white tank top I brushed my hair and teeth and walked back into the bedroom.
I smiled at the sight before me. Spencer was already in my bed. Curled up under the covers. Snoring quietly. I walked over and slowly slid into the bed so I wouldn't wake her. I stopped when I was about a foot from her face. I leaned in and kissed her forehead before settling into a comfortable position. I don't know how long I watched her sleep. I just couldn't close my eyes. The most beautiful being on this earth was sleeping next to me. I was so damn lucky.
I woke up and felt cold. I was in my big empty bed alone. Looking over at the clock I see that is passed noon. I sighed. After putting a pair of shorts and a tight shirt over my bikini I headed downstairs. I passed the office and saw that my dad was in there. He was having a conference call with his 'people'. I moved on to the kitchen and spotted Miranda in the fridge.
"Well hey there sleepy head. About time you woke up." She teased while closing the fridge. She started pouring herself a glass of lemonade.
"Good afternoon Sunshine." I said while grabbing a bagel off the counter and taking a big bite.
She hopped up onto the counter and took a sip of her lemonade.
"So Prince Eric, what's on the agenda for today?" Huh? I gave her my 'What the fuck' look.
"Prince Eric?" I asked confused.
"Yeah Prince Eric, you know from The Little Mermaid. Spence told me what you did last night. That was sweet Ash." She smiled.
"It was just a boat ride Sunshine. No biggie." I played it down.
"Sure whatever you say. What's with the new nickname?" She asked.
"Sunshine?"
"Yeah."
"I don't know. I guess because being in the sunshine always makes me happy. Sorta like you." She smiled and shook her head.
"Always the charmer Prince Eric..I mean Ashley." She hopped up off the counter and pulled me into a hug.
"I guess Sunshine is better than Doc." She said when she pulled back. I laughed.
"Keep calling me Prince Eric and I promise I will think of an even better name." I winked and walked outside still eating my bagel.
I spotted Spencer down by the water lying on a towel in the sand. Taking the long walk down to the water I stopped and pulled a lily out of the ground. When I approached Spencer I had to stop and take a deep breath. She was wearing a black and white polka dotted bikini. O…M…G did she look fucking sexy. She could seriously be a swimsuit model. I know I am biased but I have been with a lot of woman so I know what I am talking about. Trust me. On a scale of one to ten Spencer was definitely a 69. Why is the number 69 popping into my head? Oh boy, forget I said that. I moved so that I was blocking the sun from shinning on her.
"Enjoying the view?" She asked with her eyes still closed.
"Mmm, thoroughly." I answered.
"Didn't see enough last night?" She asked with a little laugh.
"I don't think I could ever see enough of you Spence. In case you didn't realize you are smokin' hot."
"Maybe I should go take a swim and cool off." She finally opened her eyes. Squinting a bit. She smiled and I felt my knees go weak. Is that normal?
"Maybe later we can go for a swim together. Maybe with less on." I winked and she shook her head.
"Sit." She said pointing next to her and throwing me her towel that she was using for a pillow.
I spread out the towel, sat down and handed her the lily.
"For you my lady." She smiled again and put the flower up to her nose.
"Thank you Ash. It's beautiful." She rolled to her side and grabbed my hand entwining our fingers.
I rolled to my side and we just stared at each other. I had never had this with anyone. There was no need for conversation. This was something I never imagined I would have with someone… Intimacy. I broke the silence when I remembered I was a little mad at her.
"You know that wasn't very nice of you." I paused and she looked confused. "Leaving me up in the big, cold empty bed while you laid around down here practically nude for everyone to see but me." I pouted and she laughed.
"Well I figured you could use some sleep. You know since you were up all morning watching me sleep." She smirked.
"What? How do you know I was watching you sleep?" She was right.
She moved in closer so she was inches from my face.
"I always know when you are watching me Ashley. In the classroom, in the club, last night. I can always feel your eyes on me." She whispered.
"Ah yes. I remember. You called it gawking." I whispered back.
"Yes but I was mad at you then." She looked down briefly. "I like the way you stare at me. I always have. You make me feel so many things that I can't even begin to describe." She took my cheek in her hand. "Your eyes are so deep, so beautiful, so full of life. I loose myself in them Ashley."
As I stare back into her crystal blues I find myself doing that exact same thing.
"I know exactly what you mean." I lean in and give her a soft kiss.
"Alright you two. As much as I love seeing you guys happy. I am bored out of my mind. Let's do something." Miranda whined.
We both laughed. "What do you want to do?" I asked her.
"I don't know. Anything."
"Waterskiing?" I suggest.
"Uh no. I don't want to die today." Dramatic much?
I laugh. "Okay, surfing."
"Like I said, I don't want to die today." Such a baby.
"Um. We could play volleyball."
"There are only 3 of us." Ugh.
"We could go skinny dipping." I look over at Spencer and wink. She shakes her head and laughs.
"Ewww. No thank you." Party pooper.
"Well Miss No Fun what do you want to do then?"
"How about I take you lovely ladies on a trip down the coast?" My dad suggests out of nowhere.
"Now that sounds like fun." Miranda says.
"Great. I'll go pack us up some snacks. You girls go get what you need. We will probably be gone until dinner."
Miranda ran into the house. My dad right behind her.
"Well I don't think we're going to get much alone time today. You think you can handle that?" I asked Spencer.
"Oh I think I'll be alright. I don't know about you though. You think you can handle it?"
"No problem. Just promise me you'll try to keep your hands and lips to yourself today. Wouldn't want to make my dad and Miranda uncomfortable."
"Me? What about you?" We both got up and folded our towels. Spencer got very close and whispered in my ear. "As I recall it was your hands and lips that were all over me last night." I got the tingly's when she was this close to me.
"Mmm. I remember." I said while the events of last night re-played in my head.
Spencer hit me in the arm. "Oww! See you can't keep your hands to yourself."
"We'll see." Is all she said as she left me and started walking towards the house.
We made our way to the marina. The look on Miranda and Spencer's faces when they saw my dad's boat was priceless. My dad didn't have just any boat. It was a lot bigger than mine. Like 5 sizes bigger than mine. My dad had a 70ft yacht. The perfect party boat. Oh yeah I know from experience.
We started our trip down the coast. Spencer and Miranda were on the deck and I made my way towards them. They were both just taking in the scenery. Well I was about to give Spencer a whole new kind of scenery. One I knew she would enjoy more. By the end of the day she wouldn't be able to keep her hands off of me. I was going to make sure of that. I had a point to prove.
They were both leaning on the railing. As I passed them I made sure to brush Spencer's back softly. Out of the corner of my eye I saw her eyes following me. I laid down a towel on the deck and set my sun lotion down. Then very slowly I lifted my shirt over my head. Just like in the movies. Picture it. Then I unbuttoned my jean shorts and sloooowly pushed them down my legs. She was so 'gawking' at me this time. I sat down on my towel and began to lotion myself up. As I turn towards Spencer I notice she has flipped around and is leaning up against the railing facing me now. There is a small smile playing on her lips but her eyes are covered by her sunglasses. I just laugh and lay down on my towel.
A couple hours later we were sitting in the back of the boat snacking on some fruit. I decided to torture Spencer some more. I grabbed a strawberry and dipped it in some chocolate. I put it to my mouth and slowly sucked the chocolate off of it. Then I bit into it. When I looked over at Spencer her mouth was partially open. Her eyes were hidden again by those damn sunglasses but I could tell my plan was working. She quickly got up and moved into the other room.
"What was that all about?" Miranda asked.
"I have no clue." I answered with a smirk.
Throughout the day I did all I could think of to get a reaction out of Spencer. From stretching my well-formed body when I didn't really need to. To bending over right in front of her. To reaching over her shoulder to get something behind her that I didn't even need. To 'accidently' stumbling into her back and pressing myself up against her.
She was breaking. Slowly but surely. She was breaking. I had her right where I wanted her.
The boat trip came to an end and we gathered up our belongings. I finally put my clothes back on and I could see the look of disappointment on Spencer's face. But at the same time she looked relieved. I just snickered at her reaction. We headed back to the house and my dad once again prepared dinner. Spencer helped him this time. I think she was just looking for a distraction.
"So what the hell was all of that today?" Miranda asked while we were setting the table out on the patio.
"What are you talking about?" She notices everything.
"You and Spencer. The silent flirting. You torturing her." Wow. She saw all of that.
"Oh nothing. Just trying to prove a point." I smiled and snickered.
"What point would that be?"
"That Spence can't behave herself."
"Did I miss something? She was practically by my side all day. When did she have time to mis-behave? Never mind. I don't want any details." She shivered.
"Easy there. She hasn't misbehaved yet…..But she will before this night's over." I laughed and walked back into the house.
After dinner we all sat out on the beach. My dad made a fire and we were roasting marshmallows. Soon after that Miranda announced she was going to bed. It was early but she was feeling a bit nauseous from the boat ride. My dad left a couple minutes after her. He said he had to make a phone call. I think he was just trying to give us some time alone. Spencer was leaving tomorrow night. I was not happy with that.
"Come here." I said to Spencer as I patted on the blanket next to me. She was sitting too far away. Wonder why. Hehe.
She hesitated but then moved closer. She put another marshmallow on her stick and put it in the fire. We didn't say anything. We just sat there. It was peaceful.
After eating her marshmallow I noticed she had a bit left on her lip.
"Spence." I said and she looked at me. I reached up and wiped the marshmallow off of her lip with my fingers.
"You had a little…" She leaned in and started kissing me before I had a chance to finish. She did that a lot.
Looks like she finally broke.
She stopped suddenly and looked into my eyes.
"You win." Is all she said and then she went back to kissing me.
She climbed on top of me and started kissing my neck. I had been waiting for this all day and I was so ready for it. I needed to feel her lips on mine again. I needed to taste her again so I pulled her head back up and slipped my tongue in her mouth.
"Ahem." I faintly heard. But nothing was going to pull me away from her.
"Ahem." I heard again and Spencer pulled back.
My dad was standing 10 ft. away holding a phone.
"Sorry. I tried calling you from the door but I guess you didn't hear. Spencer your phone has been ringing since I got back to the house. I think you might want to check it out." He handed her the phone and apologized again before heading back in.
She opened it and instantly her face turned white with worry.
"What's wrong?" I asked and I grabbed her hand.
"My brother called about 8 times. There's a text but I am afraid to look at it." She said with a shaky voice.
"Do you want me to read it?" I asked and she handed me the phone.
I took the phone from her and read the message. It was from her brother Glen.
Spence, grandma's real sick. Please call me back. Love you.
I swallowed the big lump in my throat and turned to Spencer.
"Glen wants you to call him. Your…" I paused. "Your grandma is real sick."
She looked away briefly and when she looked back at me there were tears forming in her eyes.
I handed her the phone and she just stared at it. Then she stood up and walked towards the ocean. I saw her lift the phone to her ear. When she came back to me she was full on crying. I stood up and pulled her into a hug. A feeling came over me that I had never experienced. I got choked up. I couldn't handle seeing her like this. I could feel her pain and it killed me. But I knew I had to be strong for her. That much I did know.
"I have to go home Ash. I have to see her." She mumbled into my shoulder.
"I know Baby. She needs you. Your family needs you." I held her tighter.
She pulled back and found my eyes.
"I need you right now Ashley. I just need you to hold me." She cried and I held her. We sat back down in the sand. I didn't know what else to do or what to say. So I just held her.
I helped her get to her room and change into her pajamas. She laid down in her bed and I pulled the covers over her.
"Ashley. Where are you going? Don't leave." She begged. "I need you with me tonight."
"I'm just going to change and use the bathroom. I'll be right back. I promise." She nodded and I left.
When I got back to her room she was staring up at the ceiling. She saw me and wiped her eyes. I slid into the bed and she rolled onto her side so I could hold her.
"I can't lose her Ash. She's like another parent to me. She helped me become who I am today. She was my rock. I can't lose her Ashley. I just can't."
"It's okay Spence. You're gonna go home and see her and everything is going to be alright." I kissed her head.
"You don't know that Ash."
"You're right I don't. I just don't know what else to say." I admitted.
"You don't have to say anything. Just being in your arms and feeling your warmth is enough for me."
My heart was hurting for her. I just wanted to take away all of her sadness and pain. I wanted to say the right thing to make her feel better. I wanted to do the right thing to make her feel better. But I knew I couldn't and that fucking killed me. So I just held her firmly in my arms.
"I love you Spence." It was the first time I said it and I know it was the right time.
She didn't say anything at first. She spun around in my arms and looked into my eyes. Blue meeting brown and becoming one.
"I love you too Ashley." She whispered and then laid her head on my chest.
I woke up the next morning cold. In my big, empty bed alone again. I looked over to where Spencer was sleeping and found a lily along with a note.
I rubbed my eyes and reached for the note.
Dear Ashley,
Thank you for being so wonderful last night. I needed you more than you will ever know and you were there for me. My flight leaves at 10 a.m. I'm sorry I didn't wake you. I don't think I could have handled saying goodbye. I don't know how long I am going to be there but I will call you as soon as I can. I talked to your dad and Miranda is going to stay with you while I am gone. Take care of each other.
I love you Ashley.
Love,
Spencer
I wiped my eyes and sighed. I missed her already. I wish I could have gone with her but I knew that was not an option.
I got out of bed and headed to the bathroom. When I passed the dresser I saw another note. It was folded up and propped on the top of the dresser. It said my name on the front. It looked like a poem the way it was written.
You walked into my life,
And took me by surprise,
You made me feel so loved,
You made me feel alive.
You moved me with your words,
They hit me like a train,
You held me in your arms,
And you took away the pain.
You opened my mind,
I see everything so clear,
You took me by the hand,
And you chased away the fear.
You looked into my eyes,
And saw straight to my soul,
You took what was left of my heart,
And you made it whole.
I sat down on my bed with the note still in my hand and I cried. I wasn't Ashley the fuck up anymore. I wasn't even the new Ashley anymore. I was the Ashley that Spencer fell in love with. I was the Ashley that could do those things she said I did. I had always been that Ashley. I just didn't believe in myself or have anyone that believed in me that way. As I sat there holding the two notes from Spencer I couldn't help but smile. I was somebody that could make someone happy. That could make someone feel loved, needed and alive. Not just with Spencer but Miranda too. I was someone that I could even love. I realized in that moment that the part of my heart that was missing was the belief and love that I needed in myself. For myself. It was then that I also realized that I no longer felt that emptiness anymore. Just like Spencer. My heart was….. Whole.
Review if you wish...please :)
The poem was written by me :)