DISCLAIMER: I do not own Glee. I am NOT making any profit out of this story. I do NOT know any of the people mentioned on this fanfiction. This story NEVER happened. It is a work of fiction. It is the result of a crazed fan daydreaming.
Warnings: rated M for LANGUAGE, GRAPHIC SEX SITUATIONS and VIOLENCE.
Author Notes: 'lalala' direct thoughts; "lalalala" speech ; italics for emphasis.
CHAPTER 4 – Last night
Mark was in a bad mood today. He had spent most of his night tossing and turning, hardly getting any sleep at all. He just couldn't get the conversations with Jason and Amber out of his head. While lying down on his bed he tried to tell himself that he wouldn't mind all that much if Chris had gone with the creep (the guy) on the bar back to his hotel. But soon his mind was filled with flashes of the man's naked body over Chris's, placed between the boy's open thighs grinding against the little body while kissing Chris senseless. That mental image had been enough to make Mark bolt up from his bed seeing red and it kept him awake for hours after that. Anger he could not explain tearing at his chest and it took all his self-control not to call Chris just to make sure he was in his own home, not in a damn hotel room getting fucked silly by some bastard.
The time to leave for work came all too soon and Mark was now in a semi-conscious state on Paramount, and to make matters worse, he was looking at his damn locked trailer with no idea where his damn keys were. 'Shit, I'm sure I had put them in my back pocket' he thought as he angrily searched each and every pocket he could possibly find on his clothes.
"Looking for this?"
Mark froze as he heard the voice of the countertenor…the reason he was awake all night. Yesterday, after controlling his anger, he spend the rest of the night thinking about every interaction he had with Chris for the past year, trying to figure out if he really treated the boy differently from the other gleeks. Much to his dismay the answer was yes. Thinking things thoroughly, over the past year the time he spend with Chris had increased, mainly because Mark was constantly looking for opportunities to be with the boy, because he wanted to spend time with him more than with anyone else. Yeah, the two of them were never alone since this was a huge cast, but it didn't change the fact that Mark looked for spending time with the boy. He had always told himself it was because Chris is funny, but Cory, Naya and Kevin could also be hilarious. Analyzing his own attitudes, he knew he didn't go out of his way to tease his other friends and he didn't enjoyed their faces so much after said tease session. Certainly thinking of his other friends (gleeks or not) didn't make his heart race as it had yesterday looking at Chris picture, and he sure didn't feel like punching some random fan for even thinking of sleep with the his other cast mates.
"Hey, Mark? Are you listening to me?" Chris insisted.
'And their presence don't get me anxious about turning around and just looking at them ….like Chris's is doing right now' he thought dejectedly. "Sorry Chris, I was distrac…ted" Mark turned and Chris's image hit him like a punch to the stomach. Sun was rising by now and the sky was tinged with tones of lilac and orange. The rising sun's light bathing the porcelain face, his white skin almost shining, his blue-green eyes translucent, soulful, his pink lips in a interrogated semi-pout. It was like he was seeing Chris for the very first time and, he had thought this about the kid before, but he truly, TRULLY, looked like an angel, and, right now, the most beautiful one at that.
The light, Chris standing in front of him, that moment, it was all just so incredibly…cheesy. He felt like he was stuck in some romantic movie sequence, where every detail was created to make it all seem…well, romantic. 'And damn, it's working'. The way Mark felt was so real and intense. He was nervous and his heart racing at the sight in front of him. There was no denying the way the boy was making him feel now. Chris was not like anyone else, and his feelings for Chris were not the same as before. He realized for the first time that, as the way he felt for the countertenor had been changing, the boy had been changing as well. 'Not a kid anymore…how didn't I notice before?'
"You grew taller" Mark commented surprised by it.
It caught Chris off guard "Y-yeah, I grew a couple of inches" he said with a smile, he was actually proud of that and happy that Mark of all people had noticed it. Most of the other gleeks didn't, since they saw each other almost every week even during filming breaks.
It wasn't only that he was taller. Some of the baby fat had melted away, Chris looked more mature…he looked 'beautiful'. Mark had thought that before, but now was different, now he truly stopped to contemplate at it. It wasn't a passing comment or observation, like in an art gallery or something, it was almost like he could feel it, like Chris's beauty came from the inside and it radiated from the boy. Chris couldn't be compared, because there was no one to compare him to. He was like no one else, 'beautiful and fragile looking like a humming bird, smart and rare like a White Raven*. He is just unique…and this is nuts'. Yesterday Chris was his little brother, now, he is the most stunning thing Mark ever saw.
"Uh, Mark, are you still with me?" Chris asked unsure. The way Mark was staring at him was…weird…to say the least.
"S-sorry I spaced out" Mark tried to look away.
"Yeah, I kind of noticed. For a second there I thought you'd hit a satellite or something" the boy gave his usual giggle.
"Dude, bad joke" Mark had to raise his eyebrow at that.
"I know…I haven't had any diet cokes yet." Chris shook his head tiredly "Here, your keys were in the parking lot, near your car. Be more careful, if a paparazzi or an intense fan found that, you'd have pictures of your most embarrassing boxers all over the net by noon, possibly set in slides to a cheesy song on a Youtube video." He said and waved the other gleek goodbye as he went to his own trailer.
"Thanks man" Mark smiled and watched as Chris walked away. As soon as the boy was out of sight he got in his trailer throwing himself on the couch.
"I'm FUCKED" he banged his head back against the trailer's wall as hard as he could.
The man spent last night trying to reason with others and with himself that he wasn't attracted to Chris, he spent last night trying to come up with reasons why his heart was racing when he thought about the boy, why the mere idea of him with somebody else caused him so much anger, why he felt the need to be in the boy's presence constantly. Well, Chris just blew all his reasoning to hell without even trying. Because looking at the boy now and, for the first time, listening to his own heart and body over his head while doing it, he could not deny that he was unquestionably attracted to him. From the thumping on his heart to the desire to just grab that slim waist and kiss the boy six ways from Sunday. This was not just a silly attraction, it was strong enough to cause the cool and collected (mature) Mark Salling to feel like a teenager again.
"So what now?" finally realizing what, apparently, was plain to see for some people didn't give Mark any answers as to what was he suppose to do now.
The only thing he could possibly do was get himself together 'I'm not a high school boy, damn it. Just suck it up and behave like a professional, already'.
He has been around Chris for more than a year now. So the kid grew up into someone that was cute and sexy at the same (fucking) time 'so what?'. He had worked with people that were attractive to him before. Attraction was a natural thing and it happened to a lot of people, that was what being professional was all about. He would just behave like always and ignore this crush, whatever, until it was all back to normal. Sure with everyday routine his racing heart would eventually get used to Chris's presence, and soon there would be no need to feel so anxious and nervous around him, it would be just like before.
Mark started to change into his Puck wardrobe, a little more at peace with himself, 'Ok, so I'll admit that Chris grew up. fine. It's natural that he became more attractive. It's all good. He is still my little bro…I'll just keep to myself and stay away from his love life' Mark smirked to himself and added as an afterthought 'when he gets one'**. Chris always had problems getting involved with people, romantically that is, actually he never really showed any open interest in anyone, even when a fan would come on to him like last night he would politely blow them off. 'No wonder he is a virgin'. The boy just didn't seem concerned with this kind of thing, even on interviews whenever people brushed on the subject he would just make a joke and change the subject. Nah, Mark didn't have to worry about Chris, the kid knew how to take care of himself.
X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X
'FUCK'
Mark was, once again, uncharacteristically irritated right now. 'Don't need to worry about him my ass'. Ok, Mark was really irritated right now. What the hell was happening to him? He had only now come to terms with the fact that the way he felt about Chris had changed, but, suddenly, after finally acknowledging this, it was like every single damn switch just flicked inside his head. He had spend all freaking morning searching Chris with his eyes, over aware of every time the boy's name was mentioned, of every single person that talked to the kid or…God damnit, that touched him. It was driving him nuts.
As he sat alone on a chair in a corner of the set, waiting for the director to call them back for another take, Mark pondered. He had always been cool, he had always been laid back. Even when he was in love, he was never jealous. So, what the hell was happening here?…and why couldn't he fight the impulse to intervene every single time a male coworker did so much as speak to Chris? That was what the man spent all fucking morning doing and he was pretty sure by now Chris ought to be thinking that Mark must be drunk or he is the clingiest friend the boy ever had.
Currently Mark stayed away on purpose, the man looked around as the other gleeks were scattered in small groups around set, also waiting as this was a group scene. He only hoped the fact that most of the day he couldn't tear his eyes away from Chris had gone unnoticed by the cast and crew.
Chris was at that moment talking to Amber, the two of them oblivious to the inner turmoil of their mohawked friend. From his corner of the room the countertenor was also having his own trouble concentrating, so much so that Mark's recent behavior had mostly seemed to Chris like an extension of last night's teasing. 'Last night….' That's what really was distressing him, Mark had told him that Amber had accepted that he was not interested, but then, what happened for Amber to suddenly ditch Chris and have the man taking her home yesterday? Mark hadn't lied to him, had he? Chris knew it wasn't his business but, for whatever reason, he just had to know. 'Oh hell, blame it on the diet coke'. So the boy asked before he had second thoughts:
"Amber, so you never told me…how did things go with Mark?" he asked faking innocence, what was not a hard thing for him to fake.
"Thanks for reminding me…major blow off" she said sadly.
"Oh…really? Last night?" he asked trying to not show that he already knew.
"Actually yesterday morning" she spoke matter of factly.
And now they were exactly where he wanted, "But you went home with him last night"
"Stop right there boy…I didn't go home with him. You know I don't sleep around honey. I needed to clear the air with him, so we talked a bit more and he dropped me at my apartment afterwards." Chris thought she really sounded Mercedish right now.
"Oh" the countertenor had relief in his voice.
"Why? You wanted Mark to take you home instead?" she asked sarcastically, but, actually, genuinely curious.
"Amber…we already talked about that" Chris dismissed.
"Yeah, I know…but maybe you should talk to Mark about that" she provoked watching his reactions.
"Dear God Amber…did you inhale too much hair spray on the makeup trailer? Why would I ever talk to Mark about that?" the boy gave her his best eye-roll.
"Just teasing you, baby." Amber was very perceptive and no matter what their older gleek friend said she saw how the man looked at Chris all day and how he practically materialized everywhere Chris was. She knew Mark Salling had feelings for Chris, but did her BF had feelings for Mark? The boy was not easy to read. Being gay on a small conservative town had taught the kid some tricks about concealing his crushes. This side of Chris was a mystery even to Amber. For now the woman decided not to interfere since she didn't know how her friend felt. 'For now'.
She was brought back from her reverie by the voice of the new gleek calling her, Jonathan approached them as he said "Zach wants to talk with you about some mistakes on the choreography".
The woman rolled her eyes at that "I've already said it, I'll say it again, I'm not a dancer" she walked away mumbling to herself leaving Jonathan and Chris alone.
Jonathan didn't lie, Zach indeed wanted to talk to Amber and the Broadway star was only too eager to take the opportunity to keep the little countertenor company.
The truth was Mark's new attitude towards the kid (the guard dog attitude as Jonathan would describe it) didn't go unnoticed by him. Last night, when that bastard on the bar had tried to make Chris his booty call, Jonathan had learned painfully that, whatever this thing he was feeling for the young gleek was, it wasn't going away so easily. The thought of the boy leaving with the man had been unbearable. So, until he fully understands what this thing is, he decided that he wasn't handing Chris over to anyone that easily (Selfish as it may seem. He wasn't caring much about that right now).
Since day one he knew Mark Salling had a soft spot for the boy. He saw it. But…something had changed. Before it was easy to see in the man's eyes that he especially enjoyed the kid's company. But now, the way Salling looked at the boy had become more intense …protective maybe, but more like… possessive. Almost like he was trying to keep other people away from the boy only with his glare. Maybe Jonathan was reading too much into it. Maybe Salling really felt like an older brother to Chris and after the jerk in the bar tried to pick the boy up he just got a little bit more protective….'Yeah right' Jonathan thought sarcastically.
The thing is, the whole situation triggered something in the new gleek as well. He chatted with Chris about Broadway's new shows trying to keep the boy distracted from noticing Mark. He didn't want Chris giving the man any more attention than he had too. Maybe it was because of the proximity to the boy, maybe because he wanted to know what Mark's deal was but Jonathan kept touching the countertenor here and there and catching glimpses of Salling getting angrier and angrier. When the director finally called for the cast Jonathan took the chance to be a little bolder and put a hand on the small of Chris's back. It was a bit of a surprise for the boy, who stood awkwardly (and adorably) as he always did when someone made friendly physical contact with him. After that they walked back, but as they did Jonathan kept his hand in place and looked openly to Mark meeting his burning gaze with a matching one of his own and for the second time both man thought exactly the same thing at exactly the same time.
'He likes him'
Suddenly the glaring and scolding contest had somehow become a battle of alpha males over territory. None of them mouthing one word, but both of them pretty much aware what the prize was.
Oblivious to it all Chris walked to his set mark seconds before the director yelled "action".
X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X
To say that this week had been a rollercoaster in the life of Mark Salling was an understatement.
On the beginning of the week, as they came back to film the back 9 episodes, Chris was one of Mark's best friends, and, yes, at that time he would admit he had a soft spot for the cute kid.
Only three days ago Mark had to admit that his feelings for the boy were a little deeper. After that acknowledgment the realization that other people noticed Chris began driving him mad angry.
Mark still had his private rehearsal sections with Chris, as the boy was still working on the Gaga routine and at first he was really happy about it. No Jonathan to keep ogling the kid. 'What's the deal with that guy anyway?'. Ever since that day when the two men got to a somewhat mute understanding (or as close as they could get to that) about the situation, Jonathan seemed to go out of his way to annoy him. He followed Chris around, practically breathing down on the boy's neck every single day. 'FUCK'.
But recently, anger was not the only thing driving the mohawked gleek mad.
Well, bastard Broadway stars aside, at the moment Mark wasn't really sure this rehearsal sections had been such a good idea because…You see, the other thing that was driving Mark mad at the moment (besides out of nowhere jealousy) was that his…perception…of the young and innocent Chris Colfer had become increasingly…sexual.
Looking at the boy made Mark have to sit down, Chris was getting better with the Gaga choreography and as he did, Zach and he had new thoughts about the dance routine. They had just today come up with the idea for Chris to lie down and pull his leg up in a semi splits kind of thing, in the middle of the choreography. All fine and all, if it wasn't for the view he presented the brunette gleek with.
"I'm actually somewhat flexible for someone as uncoordinated as I am" said the little countertenor as he proceeded to show how high he could hold his leg stretch out and looked in Mark's direction "See" he asked innocently.
The wave of lust hit Mark like a freaking Tsunami, his mouth went unbearably dry and the only thing the brunette could think about was what he wanted to do to Chris in that position and how many times he wanted to do it. That gave him an instant boner, thus he was sitting.
"Yeah. Right. Great. You can use that" and the minute the phrase left his mouth he was cursing himself inwardly 'Are you out of your fucking mind? Are you a fucking masochist? You'll be watching him spread his leg in the air when you can't touch him'. But the truth was that he SO wanted to see it again, and again, and again. Yes he was being creepy and a masochist, but at some point over the last year Chris had changed from the friendly, cute, angelical kid to his torment, now everything Chris seemed to exhale sex. His lean, firm, little body. His round ass, those legs. His waist...Mark really had a thing for Chris's waist, he wanted to pull him by his thin waist, lift him and fuck the boy against the shed's wall. See that innocent face sweaty, those deep, soulful eyes opened wide as Mark relentlessly shoved into him. That vulnerability aura of his even stronger as the boy was taken roughly. That sweet voice moaning and screaming, the kiss swollen, tempting pink lips forming Mark's name.
The thing was that, now that Mark had felt it himself, he could not help but notice that Chris had some weird pheromones going on there. He had something about him that yelled Hold me down and fuck me into the mattress to any male who wasn't made of stone. He had prey written all over him. And for the life of him Mark could not figure out why this knowledge drove him mad jealous. Chris wasn't his boyfriend, and he already decided that this attraction would go unattended since he didn't want to screw things up between them. But he was really having a hard time trying to ignore it. It really did bother him that someone could see Chris's vulnerability and this someone would be free to try and maybe succeed in doing the things he was thinking about doing to the little countertenor just a minute ago. And that someone could be Jonathan. Fucking Jonathan who didn't seem to be able to keep his freaking hands to himself whenever he was near the boy.
Meanwhile Chris was not as oblivious as Mark would like to think he was. At first the leg stretching thing had seem like a good idea for the number, but as soon as he did it…'I don't know if I'm being self-conscious but his eyes on me feel...heavy, intent, burning'. Chris was trying really hard not to read too much into it, he always assumed his jaded attitude to all things boys...not that he ever had any real experience dealing with them, but since people didn't show any interest before…'why would they start now? Unless it is to have fun at my expense'. Which he didn't think was the case, Mark would never do that. He didn't believe the man was capable of doing such a thing. Still, he felt something in the way Mark was looking at him as he danced, he felt...naked, under his gaze, but he pushed the feeling out of his mind and kept doing his job. There was no use focusing on something that he was probably imagining.
It may be naive thinking but Chris wasn't an experienced person on this kind of game. All through his life he felt as a plain uninteresting guy. At first he thought it would help to lose weight, but in the end, he already was too much of a zero back in Clovis for anyone to care how he looked. No, no, no Chris was way too conscious of his imperfections to let himself believe a crazy idea 'Mark?…interested? YEAH, RIGHT'. Mark's intense gaze was probably concentration on holding back laughter. 'Now, that's more like it'.
But no matter how hard Chris fought the idea that Mark was giving him heated looks it didn't change the fact that the boy was actually driving the mohawked gleek up the walls. His erection was almost painful by now and he could not keep himself from staring at Chris's ass as he danced. Even as he was chanting to himself 'don't stare at his ass, don't stare at his ass, don't stare at his a…'
His cell phone vibrated on his pocket. 'Thank God for small miracles'. The desperate man grabbed his cell with both hands as if it were a lifesaver.
"Hello Mark here" he said, sounding uncharacteristically cheerful.
"Hi Mark"
The voice in the other end made the gleek sober up. It was Jason, he hadn't talked to his friend since they had that discussion on the phone. After realizing that Jason was really on to something back then (Even if his way to put it was a little rude), Mark felt like a jerk for the way he reacted to his friend's honesty.
"Hey, I've been meaning to call you" and it was true, but his mind had been too occupied lately (with Chris) for him to get around to it. "It's good that you called me now", he wouldn't dare to mouth the rest of the sentence 'so I can keep my mind out of Chris's fuck me dance'
"I thought maybe I had pushed too far" the man's concern was honest.
"No, no. That was what I wanted to talk to you about…" Mark stole a glance at Chris and the boy was about to turn off the music. Mark took the chance "just a minute Jason…Chris, you don't have to turn it off, just keep working. I'll take the call outside" Mark's erection by now had died down enough for him to not embarrass himself, so he went outside the tin shed.
"So you were with Chris, huh?" the voice on the phone was grave.
"Yeah…rehearsing. But, Jason, listen. I have to apologize to you, you were right…about some stuff" the brunette looked down embarrassed as if he was in the presence of his friend.
"I was?" the singer surprise was obvious.
After looking around to check if there was someone close enough to overhear Mark spoke "I'm attracted to Chris…I have been for sometime, I just…didn't recognize or didn't want to recognize it for what it really was, you know? But I still have no intention of doing something about it." The gleek paced back and forth to relieve some of the tension he had build up.
"Well, I didn't expect you to ever admit it after our last talk. What happened?" Jason asked, curiosity lacing his voice.
"After that talk I thought…I…I analyzed over and over, every word I exchanged with Chris, every interaction I had with him. I wanted to find a reason…I wanted to prove you wrong, you know? But I couldn't find a reason for none of those situations other than…I just wanted…needed to be near him. Well, after coming to that conclusion attraction was pretty much a given." The man looked at the tin shed as he if could see through the walls, see the gorgeous, smart, funny boy inside.
After a few seconds of silence Jason spoke "It's good that you've come to your own conclusions. So now what? You're going to keep it to yourself?"
"Yeah. Like I said he is still my friend first and foremost, so I don't want to mix things up. I don't wanna lose him…as a friend." He added hurriedly.
"You know I'm really curious about this guy, I was kind of rude when I talked about him without even meeting him." He admitted. "You never introduced us. Hell, I actually don't know any of your cast mates. Tell you what, I have a gig this Saturday night at Ivy***, why don't you bring them? To seal peace and all"
"OK, I'll try to bring them with me. See ya Jay"
"See ya" and the line went dead.
The brunette headed back to the tin shed and his self-imposed torture. Actually, a thought that had already crossed Mark's mind before came up, if he wanted to go back to seeing Chris just as a friend he had to avoid this private rehearsals from now on. Being alone with the boy doing…that choreography…it just wasn't safe for Mark.
No matter that the mohawked man often felt otherwise, Chris wasn't his to protect. It shouldn't matter that not accompanying the young gleek on these practices would give the chance to other people (Jonathan) to be alone with him. He already had decided that he would be nothing but a friend to Chris, so that meant he had to come to grips with the possibility of the boy dating someone in the future. No matter how impossibly hard to bear that thought may seem now.
Inside the shed he saw that Chris was lying sprawled down on the floor, resting.
For a few seconds Mark looked and wondered how good it would feel to lay on top of that little firm body, between those sweaty pale thighs while kissing that pouty bottom lip. Shooking his head to clear his mind he asked "Finished?" the man didn't know whether he was happy or devastated by the nod he received as answer.
Actually Chris had stopped as soon as Mark left the shed. He noticed how the older gleek didn't want him to hear the conversation and that bothered him. He lost all interest in dancing immediately. Why the man didn't want him to hear the call? Was he talking to a friend?...to a girl? Chris was too proud to try to eavesdrop so he just lay there trying to think of something else but his mental image of Mark flirting with a mysterious girl on the phone.
His last two questions were answered as the man spoke "Listen I was talking to my friend Jason on my cell, his band is going to play the Ivy tomorrow night. There is no age restriction unless you want to buy a drink. Do you wanna go?"
'Friend Jason? On the cell? NO girl? Show…with Mark?' Chris suddenly bolted to sit down "S-sure" he answered grinning so much, someone would have thought the older man had invited him to go to Disneyland****. However, the countertenor wouldn't dare to stop and consider where so much enthusiasm had come from all of the sudden.
"Ok, great" Mark said with a big grin of his own "Now we just have to talk with the guys and see who else is game"
"Oh…of course" Chris's enthusiasm was knocked down a few pegs. 'What was I thinking…that it would be just Mark and me? It's not like you want a date or something Chris, of course is a group thing'. The countertenor would not allow himself to linger on the reason why he felt a pang in his heart at the realization, though. "I-I'll tell Amber and Jonathan" he said as he attempted his widest smile, managing a pale version of it.
"Amber...and Jonathan, yeah…you do that" Mark's own smile was all but gone. 'What are they? a couple now? Can't he go anywhere without fucking Jonathan?'. The man did his best to not let his anger show. "Listen, I'm going, I'll try to talk to the rest of the guys. Later I'll send you a message with the time and address, ok?" having said that Mark walked out of the tin shed once again.
Chris was left behind looking at the door his friend had just disappeared in, alone in the empty room, his voice was soft and low when he spoke "Yeah…I'll be waiting".
~X~X~X~X~X~
* A.N.: He really is into birds, ok? ¬_¬…and yes white ravens exist. I saw on google ^_^
** A.N.: This was not intended to be a mean comment. We all know that Mark's comments can be a little acid from time to time, even if he doesn't mean any harm by it.
*** A.N.: I invented this night club, if there actually is an Ivy club in LA it's a (weird) coincidence, since I've never been there.
****A.N.: We all know about Chris's undying love for Disneyland. Bless him, he is such a big sweet kid.
BIG FAT AUTHOR'S NOTE: More on this story is on my Livejournal. I don't think I'll post it all here. The link to it is on my profile here. So if you want to read more go ahead and click on my name, follow the pretty little "Homepage" link on my profile.