Hey everyone! I struggled to find a lot of time to write this week, so I hope the chapter turned okay and that you enjoy it!
Please, let me know!

x

Disclaimer: I do not own CSI New York or any of its characters.

Chapter Twenty

After Stella had gotten changed, she and Mac stood together, their fingers entwined, outside of Madeline's room. They watched as Madeline slowly started to wake up. Stella wasted no time in going to see her. Madeline's eye's flickered into life. She woke with a beautiful smile on her face, her eyes instantly going to the sleeping baby lying next to her, then up to her mother who had just walked into the room.

"Hey!" Stella whispered, struggling to contain her excitement. "How are you feeling?"

She sat down on the bed next to Madeline and baby Isla. Stella put one arm around Madeline and used the other to hold onto the crib that Isla was in. Mac stood cautiously at the door, not wanting to disturb this tender family moment.

"I feel like someone has just cut me in half." She laughed quietly.

Madeline propped herself up on the pillows and tried to adjust herself. She winced from the pain and effort of it all. Mac quickly went to her side and helped pull the pillows up from behind her so she could get comfortable again. He pulled a chair closer to the bed and sat down.

Stella kept switching her gaze from Madeline to Isla. It didn't take long before her arms were aching to hold the gorgeous little girl. She slowly pulled the crib towards her, so it was touching the edge of the bed. Isla twitched in her sleep and slowly her eyes started to open. She yawned widely and looked up at Stella. Carefully, Stella leant forward and scooped up the precious little bundle. With one hand firmly supporting Isla's head and the other holding her back, she lifted the baby up close to her face. Their noses touched and Stella softly kissed Isla's mouth.

"Hello, beautiful girl." Stella whispered, touching her lips to Isla's cheeks.

She cradled Isla close to her and rocked her gently back and forth. It reminded her of when Madeline was born. It was a strange but warming feeling to be experiencing this again. Her eyes started to tear up. The 3 most important people in her life were all here in this room. Stella turned to Madeline and slowly she passed over Isla. Her eyes caught Mac's as she moved. He had a soft smile on his face and was looking peacefully over the 3 of them. The room was quiet; they were all just enjoying the moment.

A nurse knocked, opened the door and stuck her head in.

"Miss Lane, if you're ready, it's time to feed baby Isla."

"I'll give you some privacy." Mac stood up out of his chair. He leant forward and kissed the top of Madeline's head. "Congratulations."

"Wait a minute Mac; can I just talk to you for a second?" Stella called out, as Mac started to leave the room. "I'll be back soon, okay." She kissed Madeline and Isla.

Stella followed Mac out into the hallway, closing the door behind her.

"Do you still have the spare key to my apartment?" She asked.

Mac stuck his hand in his pocket and eventually pulled out his set of keys. He held on to the shiny silver key.

"Yeah of course; why?"

"Would you mind going back there to get a few things? And maybe check to see if the apartments ready for Isla to come home? I don't even think the crib has been made. We thought we had more time." Stella laughed, pushing her hair off of her forehead.

"No problem. Just write down what you want me to bring, I'll drop everything off here and then head back to yours. Is there anything else you need?" Mac asked, producing a small notepad and a pen from his jacket.

Stella scribbled down a list of things that they needed and handed Mac the notepad. Her mind quickly ran through everything that they had already bought, everything they still need and what was actually necessary.

"I don't think so. I'm not sure when we're going to get out of here." Stella sighed, looking back into the room. "It's all going to be okay, isn't it?"

"It's going to be okay." Mac smiled, pulling Stella into his arms. "Come on, let's go get a quick coffee, you look exhausted."

As they walked towards a coffee machine in the hallway, Mac's phone started to ring.

"Detective Taylor." Mac walked away from Stella, gesturing that he'd be back in a minute.

Stella anxiously paced the halls, wanting only to be back with Madeline and Isla. She couldn't wait to get the both of them home, though realistically she knew it was unlikely Isla would be going anywhere anytime soon. The Doctor had already said that she would need to be monitored closely. Mac was on the phone for 5 minutes before he walked back over to Stella.

"That was Flack, he's downstairs with the surgeon who operated on Alyssa." Mac had a grim look on his face.

"She didn't make it, did she?" Stella said quietly. Mac shook his head gravely. "Oh my God. I have to go and tell Madeline." Her brow creased, she ran her hand across her forehead.

Mac put his phone back in his pocket and rested his hand on Stella's shoulder. Make could feel the tension in her muscles. Today had been a tough day for her, and this wasn't making it any easier.

"Maybe wait till later to break the bad news."

"Yeah, you're probably right. She's going to blame herself for this." Stella shook her head. "Did you find out who did this?" She said hopefully.

"Flack's got a couple of suspects in custody. Madeline may have to make an ID but Danny thinks there is enough evidence without her."

"Good. That's...that's really good. I just don't want her to go through anymore more stress. She doesn't need it, not now." Stella sighed.

Mac bought two coffees from a machine in the hallway and handed Stella a cup. She took a big gulp of it and closed her eyes. Her heart felt heavy thinking about Alyssa. She couldn't help thinking that it could've easily been Madeline.

"Why can't anything ever just work out for her?" Stella said quietly.

She finished the coffee in no less than 3 gulps. It was awful, probably the worst coffee she'd ever had but it was keeping her awake.

"It will, Stella."

Stella nodded, but she didn't seem completely convinced.

"You don't think you can handle this, do you?" Mac questioned.

"Honestly? No. I don't think I can handle this Mac. I'm scared for her, for both of them. Seeing Madeline with Isla, it just...it just makes me wonder."

"Wonder what?"

"How could I ever have given her up?"

"Stella, don't. Don't do this to yourself again. You didn't have all the support that Madeline has. You know you can't change the choice you made in the past, but you can make up for it. Madeline might be an independent young lady, but she does need you."

"Yeah, I know." Stella brought her fingers to her mouth and bit her nails.

"Stop that." Mac laughed, he took hold of Stella's hand and kissed her fingers. "Let's get you back to your daughter. I'm going to head over to your place."

Stella smiled coyly and followed Mac down the corridor. She knew Mac was right, but the over-whelming feeling of guilt was washing over her again.