My life in One piece

by Fuyutaro son

I decided to try my hand at a 'girl falls into one piece' fic, may my readers never be sane again...

2. The place between the walls

Chapter 2: The place between the walls.

Summery: It's one of THOSE stories, you know, girl falls into one piece, and destroys all of existence… OK… maybe not that last part… but she does irritate the hell out of Zoro.

Disclaimer: I am in no way associated with any legal rights to one piece in any form, I do not own one piece or any part of the merchandising, gaming, manga, anime, characters, or anything of the sort. Please do not sue me as I do not have any money. The only things that I own from this fic are my own original characters.

Things24, sorry that it took me so long to fix my fic, I've been busy.

A/N1: I KNOW ZORO IS ALSO CALLED ZOLO,

A/N2: I HAVE DECIDE TO LEAVE THE PAIRING UP TO THE READERS.

Please note that this chapter was edited on a massive scale one 10/30/09.

'thoughts'

"Words"

(inner Kaede)

-------------

Blue.

Green.

White.

These three colors were all I could see before I even opened my eyes. There was nothing else. Just a glowing light that seemed to change from a bright blue, to a bright green, to white so bright that it was blinding, and then back to blue again.. The light was almost endless, it just kept growing, then dimming, like the ebb and flow of the ocean.

The Ocean.

The smell of salt was so strong that it stung my nose. The bitter smell was so strong that it seemed to give the air itself a life of its own. It vaguely reminded me of the smell of the beach, like the wind as it blew across the water's surface.

Air.

'NOT ENOUGH AIR!'

Shooting up into a sitting position, i instantly started gasping for air while looking around frantically for whatever it was that had been suffocating me, or rather, what had been drowning me.

Blinking a few times to make sure I wasn't imagining things, i found that i was sitting in just over a foot and a half of water, which meant that i had been laying with my head under the surface of it just a few seconds ago. It also explained why my clothes were wet, though i didn't even realize that they were wet as i was to busy staring at my surroundings. While the fact that I had woken up in water was strange, it wasn't even close to being the strangest thing about my situation.

Crystals.

The walls, the ground, and even the ceiling were all completely made out of giant glowing crystals. I had never seen anything like it before in my life. the crystals were all even bigger then i was, though tat wasn't the odd part. the fact that they were all glowing wasn't even the strangest thing about them.

The glowing crystals were all changing color. They just kept changing from one color to another, as though they couldn't decide what color they wanted to be. They went from being blue, to being green, to being white, and then they changed to purple for a few seconds before starting all over again with blue.

I had never seen or even read about anything like it before in my life. The closest thing to it was the now famous crystal cave, but it wasn't anything like this. The crystals there were normal, and the walls weren't made out of crystals. These crystals were glowing, changing colors, and covered everything. it was as if the place itself was made out of the strange crystals.

After a few seconds of staring at the strange crystals, I realized that the room I was in wasn't a room, it was actually an impossibly long hallway that seemed to go on for ever in either direction, but even that wasn't the strangest thing about the place.

The doors.

The strangest thing about the place was the doors. There were hundreds of them and they were everywhere! The walls on either side of my, both to my left and to my right, were covered with doors that were placed ever few feet in the walls. Each one of the doors was made of the same strange crystal that the rest of the hall was made out of, with the only difference being that the doors didn't change colors. I didn't realize it right away as I was in to much shock, but each door was either blue, green, or purple, and had either a clear frame, or a dark black frame, though I would never really know why.

Now, I would like to say that my brain wasn't effected by any of this at all and that I instantly started trying to find a rational explanation for what was going on, but sadly, I wasn't really thinking at all. I was in way too much shock for my brain to actually function correctly, and I ended up just staring around at everything for a long time. It was probably just my brain trying to protect itself from everything or something, but it took several seconds for my brain to start working again at all.

It might not have been the normal kind of freaking out, but staring around myself with a look of horror on my face was the best I could manage at the time. There was simply to much that was just plain WRONG with my situation for me to actually take in. everything was just so-impossible that I was paralyzed by shock and horror for so long that I didn't even notice the thing that was swimming towards me until it was a few feet away. The moment I saw it, I jumped to me feet and backed away from it as fast as I could.

I wasn't sure what it was, but it was the scariest thing i had ever seen before. It was even scarier then the scene in 'The ring' where the dead chick comes out of the TV.

It was black and was swimming just under the surface of the water, moving slowly toward me. There were black things coming off of it, like the tendrils of a scary shadow creature in a movie or a game. Though the crystals that made up the floor under the water glowed just like all the other crystals, the light they gave off never shown through the tendrils, or the thing itself.

'Shit!" I thought in panic, continuing to back up as the thing slowly got closer and closer to me. "This can't be happening!"

Saying that it was a nightmare had to be an understatement. I was about to be eaten by a Freddy-Kruger wannabee that was coming straight toward me and there wasn't a thing I could do about it. It was as if my legs had a mind of their own and were refusing to do anything I told them to do. Every time I tried to turn to run from whatever it was that was coming toward me, I would stumble slightly and just end up taking a step back, never going more then a foot at a time.

'Damn it! This is not happening!' I thought, looking for some way out of the situation, though the lights and the fact that I was now suffering from my very first hangover didn't help at all. 'Come on girl, this would be a nice time to wake up now!'

"Look, whatever you are, stay away! I mean it! I have..." I said, looking around for anything I could find, though the hall seemed to be completely empty apart from me, the creature, and... "A shoe! And I am not afraid to use it!"

'A SHOE?! How dumb is this dream? 'girl sees monster, girl sees shoe, girl Girl gets eaten by monster with shoe while the shoe wanders how it got dragged into this.' I thought, knowing that the fact that I was even having this dream probably meant that I needed some serious psychological help.

While I was still trying to figure out what was going on, the thing slowly got closer and closer to me as though it had never even heard me speak.

And seeing as it was underwater, I could see how that might be the case, though I had a feeling that it wouldn't have stopped even if it did hear me.

Desperate to get the thing away from me, I quickly took the shoe and prepared to throw it, only to pause when I suddenly saw something, or rather 2 somethings.

It's Eyes.

The creature was looking up at me.

Thanks to the fact that the creatures entire body was black, I hadn't been able to see its head, which had been sticking out of the water the whole time. Thanks to the fact that it was such a dark shade of black, it ad blended in with the rest of its body perfectly, which is why I hadn't recognized it for what it was right away.

It was my cat, Lilfoot, or Lil for short.

"Meow?" she said pleadingly, trying to get me to take pity on her and get her out of her arch-nemesis, the water.

"Oh, my poor baby! I'm so sorry cutey, are you alright?" I gushed, picking her up while wishing that I had something to dry her off with.

Yeah, I know I said I didn't do cute things, but like I said, my cat is the only exception.

Upon picking her up, I noticed something a little odd, something that I had never notice before. With her fur all wet and sticking to her body, she was about a fifth her normal size.

'Wow... she looks... skinny now... damn she's got a lot of fur.' I thought, marveling at how much fur she had. I had always thought that she was a really fat cat, but this just proved that it was all just her fur.

Shaking my head and decided that it wasn't really the time to be thinking about how furry she was, I quickly turned my attention back to the hallway, now knowing that it wasn't a dream.

How did I know it wasn't a dream? Easy, you can't feel pain in dreams and my cat's claws were digging into my chest. After I had that little realization, it took me almost twenty minutes to get myself to actually do anything as I was too busy freaking out. Once I was done freaking out, or at least once I was done enough that it wouldn't be a problem, I started looking for a way out.

I know, I know. I'm a lot braver now that the big black thing turned out to be my cat, but monsters are scary, so shut up.

"This place." I whispered, looking at the walls and doors as I walled down what seemed to be the world's longest hallway. There just didn't seem to be any end. And it curved in such a strange way, almost as if it wasn't curving at all, though I could see that it was. "This place has no end to it." I whispered, wandering if I was ever going to get out of the strange crystal hall.

The hallway curved ever so slightly to the right, making it imposable to even see the end, and yet, I never came back to the same place where I had found the shoe, which I was currently carrying around with me for some odd reason. Don't ask me why, but for some strange reason, I thought it was best to keep everything I found in this place. There's no explanation or reason for it, I just knew that it was best to keep anything I found with me.

It took me about half an hour to figure out why I never came to the same spot and why I didn't come to a dead end.

"It's sloping downward!" I stated when I finally figured it out. (I'm slow, so sue me. Just blame it on the hangover.)

It took me a few minutes of looking up and down the hall before I finally realized that that the water on the floor was flowing down the hall in the direction that I was heading, meaning that the hall had to be sloping enough for it to cause the water to move, which also meant that I was heading to the bottom of a giant spiral shaped hallway.

After another twenty or so minutes of walking toward the bottom of the hall, I finally came to the conclusion that I was probably heading in the wrong direction, and that I should turn around and run toward the top of the hall instead. My reasoning behind this decision was simply that it was impossible for a building to be this big, unless it was at least partially underground, and if that was the cause, then I was probably getting farther and farther away from the entrance.

Then again, it was impossible for me to be here in the first place.

That is until I stubbed my toe.

"Shit!" I yelled trying not to drop my cat or the shoe as I nearly fell face first into the water. (Again, I wasn't completely sure why I wanted to keep the shoe with me so much, I just did.)

Straitening up slightly from my 'I'm in pain' position, I started looking around for whatever it was that I had tripped over, only to find that it was some kind of strange, orange rock.

Picking it up and blinking at it a few times, I quickly shoved it and the shoe into my pockets, knowing that it I didn't really have time to stop and figure out what it really was. Once I was able to start walking again, I took off running up the hall, no longer heading for the bottom. After a few minutes of running, I cam across a strange looking round thing, which I promptly tripped over, throwing my cat into the water as I slammed into the water cover floor face first.

"Umph!" I said as the air was knocked out of my, wishing that it had been a dream because if it had been, it wouldn't have hurt nearly as much. 'crystal is so not as nice as carpet!' I thought, groaning in pain as I sat up.

You would think that the foot and a half deep water would have made the fall less painful, but all it really did was make it hard for me to breath.

Once I was sure I hadn't broken anything, I quickly picked my cat up out of the water, ignoring her angry hisses, and started looking for whatever it was that I had tripped over. For the second time in just a little over six or seven minutes, I found (and had tripped over) something almost as strange as the crystal hallway itself. It didn't take me long to find it, seeing as it was the only other thing in the place that wasn't blue, green, or purple apart from me, my cat, the shoe, and the rock.

"Huh?" I said, splashing over to the strange round object. Picking it up, I slowly began to examine it. It was like nothing I had ever seen before, it was definitely made out of some sort of metal, but it was transparent, like colored glass, only it was more like steel.

Then again, the color made it look more like a metallic amber.

"Hm.. It's so weird... It doesn't look like it belongs in this place..." I whispered, looking it over one more time before sticking it into my pocket with the orange rock, ignoring the fact that I was now talking to my self.

Making sure I had I good grip on Lilfoot so that I wouldn't drop her as I walked through the knee deep water, I started back up the hall, moving at a slower pace this time so that I wouldn't end up making out with the floor again as I it had turned out to be a horrible kisser.

There was another reason I wanted to take my time, apart from not wanting to have another face to face meeting with the floor. I was also moving slower so that I could look around for anything that might be hidden on the floor under the water. I wasn't sure why, but I had a funny feeling that there were things in the hall that were meant to help me, though I couldn't explain how I knew.

I continued walking for a while, wandering if I was going to find a way out or something that could help me figure out where I was. After about an hour of walking, the unthinkable happened.

I came to a dead end.

"What?! You can't be serious!" I screeched, stomping my foot while some how managing to not drop Lilfoot in my shock and surprise.

It was a dead end, which meant that, for the past hour and something minutes, I had been heading in the wrong direction.

"I can't believe this! My legs are tired, I'm trapped in some strange ass place, I have been standing in water, my head hurts, and I think I'm getting trench-foot. I hate this place!" I screamed angrily, yelling as loud as I could, only to wish I hadn't a tenth of a second later.

Sound reverberates off of crystal.

Loudly.

The sound of the reverberation caused my ears to hurt so badly that I thought I was going to pass out from the pain. It also managed to scare the hell out of my cat, which caused her to start clawing the hell out of my arms.

"Hiss!" she hissed at me, clearly not happy with me for causing such a horrible sound.

The sound subsided after a short while, leaving only silence in the strange place, though the silence was marred slightly by the sounds of the water and my very pissed off cat.

After a few minutes of kicking at the wall in front of me I realized that there were two things sitting just under the knee high water in the corner of the hallway, two things that could probably help me.

OK, so it was really just one thing that could help me, and one thing that I was planing to burn the second I got the chance to.

My backpack, and the creep-a-licious bag that my Aunt Pinoka had given me. (can you guess which one I wanted to burn? Here's a hint, it isn't the first one)

They were both sitting on the crystal floor in front of the wall, which, unfortunately meant that everything was now wet and ruined, but that wasn't the point. The point was that there was no way that the bags could have traveled all the way up the hall on their own, which meant that they had to have been here ever since they got here.

Then again, I wasn't even sure how we had gotten here in the first place, but they could still be indicators on where I came in at.

"My books!" I shouted in horror, panicking when I realized that even if I did get out of the strange crystal hall, I would still have to get new books now that they had been ruined. (Do you people have any idea how much collage books cost? This was going to put me back a lot if they are ruined.) "No! I can't afford to get new books! Damn it!" I shouted frantically after checking to see if they were OK.

They weren't.

The books and the paper that I had kept in the backpack were completely ruined having gotten soaked through thanks to the water. The pages of the books were sticking together, and most of the paper looked like it was starting to turn into mush.

'I just had to get the Eco friendly paper.' I thought sadly, knowing that the paper wouldn't have turned to mush so fast if it wasn't for the fact that I got the kind that decomposed quickly.

Deciding that standing around wasn't a very good idea, I stuffed the froggy bag back into my backpack and slung it over my shoulder, causing my cat to hiss at me in annoyance when I accidentally splashed her with some water.

Considering that cat's furs are meant to stay dry, I was betting that the water wasn't very good for her health.

"If she keeps getting wet like this, she's going to get sick." I said, petting her in an attempt to make her feel better.

Taking one last look around, a thought suddenly dawned on me.

"Where the hell is all the water coming from?" I asked, looking at the water near the dead end, realizing that the water had to be coming from somewhere. "What? How is that even possible?"

It wasn't coming from anywhere. It was just there, which was impossible because all the water was flowing down the hall, which meant that the water at the top of the hall had to be getting shallower and shallower, but it wasn't. At the very least the water should have been coming from somewhere, like through cracks in the floor or something, but it wasn't.

"That's not possible." I said, bending over to get a closer look at the floor, though the fact that there was a foot and a half of water to look through didn't exactly let me look to closely at the floor.

Not able to see any cracks in the floor, I straightened up and tried to figure out how it was even possible deciding in the end that there must be really small cracks in the floor that were just two small for me to see. That was the only possible explanation.

Glancing around one more time to see if there was anything else on the floor, a though suddenly occurred to me.

'The doors! The only way in or out of this place is probably through one of these doors!' I thought, smacking my forehead with my free hand my surprised by own stupidity. 'Why the hell didn't think of that before?! I probably ran right past the right door on my way up here.'

When you're in a hallway, usually the fastest way to get out of it was to find the door or exit, which meant that I should have been checking each of the doors as I past them. They were all over the place, so if I wanted to get out of this strange hallway, I was going to have to start opening them.

Keeping that thought in mind, I slowly walked over to one of the doors, a green one, and opened it, only to wish I hadn't a second later.

"AH!!!!" I screamed, slamming the door shut as a giant snake the size of the empire state building tried to come through it, knocking down trees as it tried to come out of the forest that was on the other side of the door.

Luckily, I got the door shut just in time.

"What the hell was that?!" I shouted, leaning back against he wall opposite of the door, trying to catch my breath and calm my nerves.

"OK, this doesn't make sense! I can feel pain here so it isn't a dream, but there was that big ass snake in a forest! That thing can't exist!" I said, freaking out.

That snakes head had been even bigger then my body, and there was no way that thing could have been real. I already knew I wasn't dreaming because you can't feel pain in dreams, so it had to be real, but that was impossible. Snakes that big simply did not exist. They might be in movies, but those snakes were all CG or something like that.

It was in the middle of my panicked attack that I heard a sound that made me jump.

"Hiss!"

'Is it going to come through the door?!' I wandered in horror, hoping against hope that it wasn't going to come through and eat me.

After several seconds of sitting there, unable to move as I stared at the door in horror, I realized that the hissing sound wasn't coming from the other side of the door. In fact, there wasn't any sound coming from any of the doors. The hissing sound that had nearly caused me to have a heart attack was coming from somewhere near my chest.

Glancing down to see what was making the sound, I saw that it was only my cat. In my fear and panic I had been unconsciously strangling her, having tightened my grip on her when I saw the snake.

Realizing that I was strangling her, I quickly loosened my grip and started taking deep breaths, trying to calm my nerves.

"OK, it doesn't seem to be coming through the door, so I guess we're safe for now." I said, petting Lil's head in an attempt to apologize for nearly strangling her, happy about the fact that the snake didn't seem to be able to come through the door, and trying not to be scared shit-less at the fact that a giant snake had just tried to make me it's dinner.

"Scratch that, with it's size, I'd say I would only be an appetizer." I said, still looking at the glowing green door.

After a few minutes of trying to calm down, I somehow managed to convince myself that the whole thing had just been my imagination and that I should try another door.

'OK Kida, you can't let this slow you down, you have to find a way out of this crazy place' I thought, ignoring the little voice in the back of my head that was telling me that it was a bad idea.

Looking at the door closest to me, which happened to be purple, I got up and stood in front of it, bracing myself for what I was about to do.

"OK Kida, you can do this. The snake was just your imagination, there is no way that there could be a monster or anything scary on the other side of this door." I said, pausing for a second with my hand on the door. "And even if there is something on the other side of the door, like a giant snake, the snake didn't seem to be able to come through the door, so if I don't like what's on the other side, I will just close the door as fast as I can." I said, though I wasn't really all that convinced. "Right, here we go."

Taking a deep breath, turned the door nob and opened the door.

"KATON!"

In the blink of an eye, a flash of fiery insanity came flying out of the door at me, nearly catching my hair on fire. The instant I saw the fire coming, I closed the door as fast as I could and jumped away from it, which turned out to be a very stupid thing to do.

Why was it a stupid thing to do? It was a stupid thing to do because it caused 4 things to happen simultaneously.

Thing number 1: I hit a blue door.

Thing number 2: The blue door opened.

Thing number 3: I Figured out what the door colors mean.

Green means a forest or something like that.

Purple means the inside of a room, which I figured out when I opened the purple door and it opened into a room where a guy with black hair, a blue shirt and a pair of white shorts promptly sent a fire ball at my head.

Blue, on the other hand, means do not open. Why does blue mean do not open? Because of the forth thing that happened.

number 4: I found out why the floors were wet.

Water.

Lot's and lot's of water.

I let out a scream as the water from the blue door pored out into into the hallway, washing me and my cat down the hall at a speed that most cops would arrest you for. Gallons upon gallons of water pored into the hallway. It was at least a couple thousand gallons of water. The hall might have only tilted down at a gradual angle, but the force of the water was so strong that it sent us down the hall like one of those water slides at six flags, and a very fast one at that.

Door after door flew by as the water pushed my and my cat right past each and every one of them. It was as if the water itself was trying to drown us, or slam us into whatever it was that was at the bottom of the hall.

When the water finally started to slow down and gradually lower in level and run by us, all I could do was sit there and have my first true nervous breakdown since I had woken up in the strange crystal hall.

"This is not happening. This is not happening. THIS IS NOT HAPPENING! WHAT THE HELL IS WITH THIS PLACE! None of this is possible! None of it! I'm a real person! This doesn't happen in real life! Am I stuck in some psychotic bitches little story where she just wants to torture me or something?!" I screamed, slapping the water with my fists while crying out in anger and frustration, causing Lil to jump out of my arms and into the water. (A/N: actually, while I am psychotic, I happen to be a guy... but she doesn't need to know that part :D)

I was wet, I was cold, I was hungry, I was hurt, and I was scared, but most of all, I was PISSED.

I stood up in an instant started screaming at the walls, screaming at the doors, and screaming at whoever the hell did this to me.

"If I ever find who ever the hell put me here, I'll kill you! Do you hear me?! I'll rip your fucking balls off and kill you!" I shouted, kicking at the water angrily as I continued to cry.

After a few more seconds, my anger slowly came down to a more manageable level, leaving me tired from the sudden loss of adrenaline and breathing hard from exhaustion.

Sighing deeply, I looked around to see where my cat went while I was throwing my little tantrum. It took me less then a second to find her, and when I did, it felt like my stomach was about to pop out my ass.

She had found a fishy.

The fishy was big.

The big fishy had teeth.

The teeth on the big fishy were huge.

She was trying to eat the big fishy with the huge teeth.

She was trying to eat the big fishy with the huge teeth's tongue.

She was trying to commit suicide. That's the only possible explanation.

"No! Lilfoot! Get away from there!" I shouted, running over to her and getting her away from her catch of the day as fast as I could. The moment I was within reach and had pulled her out of the thing's mouth, it snapped it's jaws and mashed it's teeth at us, trying to get at her and me.

Jumping back, I quickly ran in the opposite direction, running down the hallway so that it wouldn't be able to get to me or Lilfoot with it's flailing and...

Hopping?

"What the hell?!" I shouted in shock horror, running up the hall as fast as I could until the shark was out of sight. If it was going to hop after me, then I was going to run from it.

"Come on Lilfoot. Let's not bother the big mean man eating shark. OK?" I said, slowing my run into a quick walk, and then to a slow slosh. The water might have been up to my knees, but it wasn't nearly deep enough for a shark that big to swim to after us, the best it could manage was a weird hopping motion. Though the hopping motion had given me the creeps because the hopping motion was making it clear that it intended on chasing us.

Not a happy thought.

After another hour of walking down the hall, I finally decided that I had to try another door, though I was dead set on never trying another blue one again.

The only reason why I was even bothering to open any of the doors after everything that had happened was because I was now fully convinced that the only way to get home was through one of these doors.

Seeing the snake in on the other side of the first door hadn't really told me anything because I had kind of been in denial on the whole thing until I opened the second door. The second door had given me a few clues as to where I was, and though the clues didn't really make any sense at all, they did tell me one thing.

We weren't in St. Louis anymore, in fact, we most likely weren't even in the same dimension for that matter, which I knew should be impossible, but after everything I had been through, I was willing to believe anything.

There was no way I was still in my own world, because if I was, then there would have been no way for me to nearly get burned to ash by a Katon Jutsu. I wasn't stupid, I recognized the guy that had nearly killed me. It had been a certain Uchiha from one of my favorite anime, which didn't really make sense at all to begin with, but there was no denying it.

Then, there was what happened to my skin when I opened the door. It had changed, turning more cartoony, changing back only when the door was closed.

While normal logic would say that none of this was possible, I wasn't so dumb as to think that logic actually dictated anything in life, though it helped that my Aunt Pinoka had once told me about a theory that some scientist had come up with. (A/N: Please note that I came up with this idea and that it is not a real theory)

She said that there was a scientist that theorized that some people could see into other dimensions when they slept, saying that they were dimensional dreamers. She had also stated that the guy theorized that there were people that could move between these different dimensions, saying that they were called dimensional travelers. If that was so, then it was possible that Masashi Kishimoto was a dimensional dreamer and that Naruto was actually one of the many dimensions.

It also explained how I got here, because my aunt had also said that the scientist had also theorized that the dimensional travelers weren't the only ones that went from dimension to dimension and that there were also places that were so closed to other dimensions that they acted as door ways, which would explain why so many people went missing in my apartment.

Now, while normally I wouldn't have even considered any of these things, I had been through to much in one day for my brain not to accept the first explanation about the place that came to mind, though that doesn't mean that I didn't just stand there for a few hours, thinking about weather or not any of it was even possible, because I did. I just gave up and went with it after about three hours.

So, with these theories in mind, I opened one of the green doors and looked through it, hoping that it would lead to the right world.

"OK, it's not so bad." I said, looking at a field of flowers that were just beyond the door, only to have a giant white screaming mask-like face appear in front of me out of no where.

"Um... bye!" I said, slamming the door, pausing only for a second before going through my backpack to pool out one of my permanent markers from school.

"Nope, not going through that door, that's for damn sure. No hollows for me." I said as I pulled out a permanent black marker and started to try and write on the door, luckily, the water hadn't ruined it and the crystals didn't make it impossible to write on the door.

Putting the tip of the marker to the door, I wrote the words:

'Hollows – Bleach.'

"So far, I've been attacked by a Naruto character, a bleach monster, and an anaconda that was definitely from the movie 'Anaconda'. Yep, I don't think I'm in Missouri anymore Toto... I mean Lilfoot." I said, thinking about everything that had happened to me so far, and none of the thoughts running through my head were very happy ones.

"HOW THE HELL AM I GOING TO GET HOME?!" I shouted in frustration, looking around at all of the doors lining the hall, and knowing that there had to be thousands, if not millions of them.

Why couldn't my life just gone on to be normal? Why had it suddenly turned into a very strange and freaky life? Why the hell did I have to rent that apartment.

"How am I supposed to know which door leads home?" I thought out loud, looking at all the doors around me.

"I don't know."

"Well I wasn't expecting you to-"

I stopped half way through my sentence staring at my cat, who was now half inside my backpack with her head sticking out of it, staring at me in the same way I was staring at her. Then, both of our jaws dropped to the floor.

The fact that both of our jaws were actually touching the floor wasn't normal at all, but that wasn't what I was freaking out about.

"You! You talked!" I said pointing at her. (A/N: please note that her jaw is once again on the floor, and most likely filling up with water)

At this point Lilfoot jumped out of the backpack and onto one of the crystals that were coming out of the wall, and promptly started doing what must have been her happy dance.

"I TALKED! I spoke! And you understood me! And I understood you? That's right! I did understand you!" she said happily, still doing her happy dance.

I stared at her for a few more moments before my mouth decided that it would now function properly again.

"But-You-then-Wa? How?" I asked, still not able to believe that my cat had actually spoken, even though I had already figured out that, in this place, anything was possible.

"I don't know, I ate this thing that smelled nice in your frog's mouth, and then I heard someone talking instead of the gibberish I usually hear, so I answered the feline talking to me, which turned out to be you!" she said, putting two and two together.

"I'm not a feline! I mean cat! I'm a human!" I said, slightly annoyed that she wasn't able to see difference.

"I know that! I thought it was another cat when I answered though. And besides, you have a tail, so it's easy to make that mistake." she said, giving me the evil eye, which she usually reserved for people that would dare deny her some of their food.

"Fine, what ev- huh? I don't have a tail." I said, slightly confused about why she would think that I had one.

"Um? Then what's that behind you?" She asked, using one of her paws to point over my shoulder. "Mine is so fluffier then yours." she added with a slight hint of jealousy.

Turning my head to see what she was talking about, I saw something that made my eye start to do it's little twitching dance again.

"I. Have. A. Tail!" I shouted in horror, reaching around and grabbing it, and instantly wishing I hadn't.

It hurt.

A lot.

There were 2 things that caused me to feel pain when I grabbed my new tail.

The first was that I had grabbed it too roughly, which I quickly added to the brand new 'things not to do to my tail' list.

The other thing that cause my new tail pain was the new claws, which I hadn't even noticed I had until I accidentally used them on my tail. They weren't so much claws as really long, really thick, and really sharp nails, which turned out to be retractable because they quickly turned back to normal length and thickness.

"Great... Let me guess..whatever you ate gave you the ability to talk, and turned me into a cat girl." I said, checking my head to see if I had cat ears, relaxing only a little when I found that I didn't. With the way my day is going, by the end of it I won't even be me anymore, and that wasn't a happy thought at all.

"It's not so bad, the cote is really pretty, even if it is weird that your tail is black while your hair is white..." Lil said, not at all helping the situation at all.

It was at that moment that I caught my reflection in the surface of the water.

"Great, my pupils are slits now, and I have fangs." I said, wandering how my canines hadn't cut into my gums when they grew.

"OK, so that's not so bad, I can live with that." I said, wandering why I wasn't freaking out and also thinking that it could have been worse.

At least I didn't have cat ears, then I really wouldn't ever be able to have a normal life again.

"Huh, now that I see them, you do have 2 fangs two." she said, trying to get a better look at my teeth by leaning as far forward as she could, which almost caused her to fall off of the crystal ledge and into the water, something that she really didn't wanted to happen.

"OK. so eyes, teeth, claws, and tail. Nothing else? As long as nothing else changes, I can live with that." I said, straightening back up and turning the subject to whatever it was that she had eaten. "OK, now tell me about this thing you ate, you said it was in my frogs mouth?" I asked her, trying to figure out what she meant by that.

"Yeah, I'll show you." she said, diving, and I do mean DIVING, back into my backpack, coming back out a few seconds later with the 'it's so cute it's fuggly' bag my aunt gave me.

The fact that the thing seemed perfectly dry while everything else was wet made my eye twitch.

'I will destroy it, it can't beat me, I will destroy it.' I thought, my eye twitching away.

Of course, it was just my luck that the one thing I wish would get destroyed was the only thing that hadn't even been damaged.

Still slightly annoyed at the fact that it hadn't gotten damaged, I took the bag out of her mouth and opened it, taking a looking in side for the first time.

"This isn't a frog, it's a bag that looks like a frog." I explained to her as I continued looked through the bag.

While I began looking thought the bag, I was silently hoping that it would be able to help me get home as it had somehow given my cat the ability to talk, though the fact that my Aunt Pinoka had given me this bag wasn't lost on me.

"Anyway, what did the thing you ate look like?" I asked her, starting to realize that the bag was a lot bigger then it looked.

A LOT bigger.

"I don't know." She said, thinking about it for a few minutes. "It was a tan color, and looked like those big silver things your cousin puts on her ears everyday."

Straightening up to look at her, it took me a second to get over the fact that she even knew what a cousin was, let alone the fact that she seemed to know who my cousins were.

After I got over my shock at her knowing about a human's family, I started trying to think of what earrings she was talking about.

"Crystal's silver moon earrings?" I asked, ignoring the irony of the girls name while trying to think of something edible that was shaped like her earrings that was tan.

"If that's what they are called, then yeah." she said, looking at me like I was crazy for expecting her to know there name. "and it had this in it" she added, using her paw to pull something out of her right ear.

'Oh my god, she hid something in her ear? EW!' I thought, shivering slightly in disgust while trying not to imagine what it would be like to use my ears as hiding spots.

Getting over my ick-factor moment, I took the thing she was handing me and looked at it.

It was a fortune, one of the ones you find in fortune cookies. Which made perfect sense. A fortune cookie was the only thing I knew of that was shaped like a quarter moon, was tan, and was edible.

"You ate a fortune cookie? Great, my Japanese Aunt gave me a bag with a Chinese fortune cookie in it that gave my black Norwegian forest cat the ability to speak." I said, only half confused and wandering if there was going to be a French man in the bag too.

"And it gave you a tail, slit pupils, claws, and fangs." Lil added in agreement, pointing out that even she thought this was weird.

Ignoring her comment, I looked at the slip of paper and couldn't believe what I found.

The front of it read: 'A perfect trade. Get one, give one. Get a tail, learn to speak. '.

There were two reasons why I couldn't believe what I had just read. The first reason was because it was in my aunt's handwriting. The second reason why I couldn't believe what I was reading, was because it was actual proof that my aunt had something to do with this.

I read it through out loud several times before it finally sunk in. When it did sink in, the realization started to make my eye twitch again.

"She put a fortune cookie in my bag, and you ate the fortune cookie and now you can speak..."

…

…

…

"I'M GOING TO KILL HER! She must have had something to do with this, I just know it!" I screamed, my frustrations getting the better of me once again, causing Lilfoot to take cover in my backpack while I through my hissy-fit.

After several minutes of screaming and shouting at everything, I finally calmed down enough to start looking through the little Naruto like froggy bag, vaguely acknowledging the fact that it may very well be Naruto's money bag, or at least made by the same people.

"Let's see what's in here." I said, wanting to know what she had put in it, remembering the sneaky comment she had said to me, now realized she had said for this very reason.

'It has everything that you could possible need for your new... Home. Now be sure not to lose it as it is very important.' I thought, going over what she had said in my head, now knowing that there had been a hidden message in it.

"Ok, let's see.." I said out loud, pulling stuff out of the small bag and laying setting them aside on the crystal ledge."There's a couple of books, a scroll, 3 more fortune cookies, a.. mallet?" I said in surprised.

It wasn't just a mallet, it was a really big mallet! Its hammer was the same size as my torso and its pole and handle was around 5 and a half feet long, which made it huge.

The fact that a giant mallet was a bag that could fit in my hand wasn't the only strange thing about the bag, in fact, there was so much stuff in it that it was very clear that this wasn't an ordinary bag. There was a lot more stuff in it then physically possible.

"Damn girl! That's one big hammer you've got there!" Lil said, gawking at the shier size of the giant mallet.

"It's not a hammer, it's a mallet." I corrected, looking at it and wandering how the hell it managed to fit into the bag.

'Don't think about it, you know it doesn't fit in there, but that doesn't stop it from being in there.' I thought, knowing that if I thought about it too much my head would probably start hurting.

Sighing heavily, I put everything I had found back into the bag, deciding to look through it again some other time when getting out of the crystal hall wasn't a pressing matter. I wasn't sure why, but somehow I knew that the mallet was the only thing in it that could help me at the moment and that everything else in the bag couldn't really help me at the moment.

"Aw! Can't I have another one of those fortune things?" Lil asked, looking at me with her big golden eyes, begging for another one.

"No! We have no idea what those things might do, one already gave you the ability to speak and gave me cat stuff, the next one might turn you into a mouse for all we know." I told her, choosing my words very carefully, knowing that as a cat, the thought of becoming a mouse would probably scare her enough to keep her away from the fortune cookies.

And I was right.

"Yeah... Now that I think about it, I am kind of full." She lied, trying to act like she wasn't changing her mind because of what I said, but failing miserably.

"Good, now come on." I said, picking the backpack back up and slinging it over my shoulder. I momentarily thought about shoving the little froggy bag back into it the backpack, but quickly squashed that idea as I didn't really trust my cat not to eat another fortune cookie and wanted to keep the mallet with in reach, just in case.

'You never know with this place, a mallet might come in handy.' I thought, hooking the froggy bag to my belt, making sure that the handle of the mallet was sticking enough for me to get to it if I really needed to.

Having everything situated, I straightened up and started heading down the hall, only to be stopped by Lilfoot almost as soon as I started moving.

Pausing in my tracks, I turned toward her in order to see what the problem was, only to see that she was now glaring at me.

"Do you really expect me to swim in the water? Are you nuts? I'm a cat for crying out loud!" she said, acting as though I should have known this.

"Right, I forgot." I said sarcastically, walking back over to her to pick her up, only for her to stop me once again.

"Do you want me to carry you or not?" I asked in an annoyed voice, starting to get annoyed with her.

If she didn't make up her mind, I was going to force her to swim after me.

"Turn around." she said, making a circle in the air with one of her paws, directing me to turn so my back was facing her.

"Why?" I asked, wandering why in the world she wanted me to turn around.

"Because, I want to sleep in the backpack!" she said, acting like I should have already known this.

"Fine! Here, get in." I growled, turning around and waited for her to get in, silently wandering if it would still be animal cruelty if I drown her in a magical hallway.

When my backpack was finally in front of her, she quickly jumped into it and poked her head out. Apparently she didn't really want to sleep at all, she was just to lazy to walk and didn't want to be carried at the moment..

"Fh. What ever, let's just go." I said, rolling my eyes at her.

And with that said, we were off again, trying doors and running away from what ever nastiness was on the other side.

After twenty or so doors, all of which had something on the other side of them that I was to much of a chicken to try to deal with, I finally got up enough bravery to open another blue door, though I had the sinking suspicions that my 'blue = drowning' idea was most likely right.

"What do you think you're doing?" I heard from over my shoulder.

Turning my head to look at Lilfoot, I simply glared at her and turned back to the door, fully intent on opening the door.

"What does it look like I'm doing? I'm trying another door." I stated calmly, though I was still trying to convince my self that it wouldn't get me killed.

"Don't you remember what happened the last time you opened one of the blue doors? We almost drown!" she said nervously, apparently having the same thoughts as me, though she seemed to be being a little over dramatic about it in my opinion.

'sheesh, her and her dramatics...' I thought, wandering if it was a cat thing.

"I remember what happened perfectly, but I decided that I should try another one, I mean, the fact that the last one was under water could have just been a coincidence." I pointed out, though I didn't really believe that my self.

Ignoring the rest of her pleas for me to reconsider, I grabbing the door handle firmly and pushed it open ever so slightly, fully planing to slam it shut if even a tiny bit of water came out of it.

"NO!" Lil screamed, diving back into my backpack as the door opened, which turned out to be completely pointless as nothing happened.

'I'm still kind of dry, Kind of being the operative word though... Damn I wish the floor didn't have so much water on it.' I thought, happy that water hadn't come rushing through the door to drown me.

Sighing heavily, I let Lilfoot know that she could come out now, and that the big bad water wasn't going to hurt her.

"I knew that," she said, slowly sticking her head out of my backpack to look at the through narrowed eyes, as though she still wasn't convinced that water wasn't going to come flying out of it. "I was just- um... reading one of your books! The Spanish book! Yeah, it was really interesting."

"There isn't even a Spanish book in there, fuzz bucket, and I seriously doubt you would be able to read it if there was one. Nice try though." I said, adding the last part with a large smirk on my face.

"Fine, what ever. Now that we know that water isn't going to come poring out of there, don't you think we should actually see what's on the other side." she stated, clearly trying to change the subject.

I didn't really want to change the subject, but she did have a good point.

Turning to the door I opened it a little more and glanced in side, only to have my jaw drop to the floor. I was looking in on the world of x-men. The door had opened up to someplace one a beach near the water, and a short ways off in the distance was a small group of my favorite people from the movies. I unconsciously stuck my hand out to point at them in surprise, only to find that something was keeping my hand from going past the open door.

It was an invisible barrier, one that wasn't allowing me to go through the door.

"What the?" I said in surprise, shocked that I wasn't able to go through the door.

Deciding that it was pointless to keep trying to go through the invisible barrier, I closed the door and moved my backpack around so that I could look at Lilfoot, though I didn't really think that she knew anything about it.

"Why couldn't my hand go through the door? It was like an invisible wall was blocking me." I said, marking the door like I had all the other while trying to keep my backpack in my arms.

"Hm.. I'm betting we can only go through a certain door. You know, only the one you're meant to go through, and the rest are sealed off or something. Things can come in through any door, but they must leave through a particular one, like the one they came in through or something. That kind of thing." Lil stated with her head titled sideways in a thoughtful manner.

I was a little surprised at the fact that she had been able to answer me without needing to think about it, but her explanation did seem to explain it. Taking a deep breath, I turned to the next door, which turned out to be blue as well.

"OK, so if I can go through it, then it's the right door?" I asked Lilfoot, knowing that she didn't really know for sure either, but still wanting her opinion as she had been the one to come up with the theory. It also wasn't lost on my that she was very smart for a cat, something I had always known, but now had to deal with on a conversational level.

"That's what I think, but then again, I'm new to this place too." she pointed out, ducking her head back down, just in case water came through the door.

Taking a deep breath, I opened the door, which instantly proved her theory right as it did something none of the other doors had done.

The moment the door was open, I was pulled through the door just like the night before in my apartment (which I was slowly starting to remember), dragging her along with me.

When I finally stopped moving and had landed not so softly on the ground, I quickly started looking around for the door, only to find that it had vanished. I also found that my camping stuff was there in front of me, which I hadn't even seen in the crystal hall. Everything that I had had on me when I got sucked through the door was still there, including my annoying cat.

"Coby! Who is the most beautiful of all these seas?" said a loud voice.

"No, It can't be." Me and Lilfoot whispered in shock as we both turned out head and saw the first villain of the one piece anime series. Then Lil did the unthinkable.

"Oh My god! It's the elephant lady!"

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