A/N: Thanks to those who reviewed! So, how about that promo? Looks intense! Then again, Degrassi promos almost ALWAYS look intense. We'll see just how intense it gets come July, I guess. This chapter is slightly longer than the first. I had a hard time writing a father/son conversation because I've never had a good dad, and obviously I've never been a son. Review, please!

If you want to talk/fangirl with me, my twitter is literarylolita and my tumblr is .com

Disclaimer: If I owned Degrassi, there would be far less screen time for Alli.

Clare

Joy. Pure, unadulterated joy is all I feel as I skip through the frostival. I giggle and touch my lips again, giddy with happiness. When was the last time I felt this happy? This light? Probably when Jake and I first got together, right after Eli and I broke up. That was so long ago, though, and Eli and I just kissed…

Oh my God.

Eli and I just kissed.

No, scratch that; I had kissed Eli.

Oh, my. What did I just do? Was that a huge mistake? Was it a risk? Was it worth it?

Yes, no, yes, no…I don't know.

Trying not to get too lost in thought, I make my way to the red truck parked in front of Degrassi. Jake and Jenna are leaning against it with clasped hands. I'm surprised at how little the sight stings; it's more annoying than hurtful. That's an appropriate sisterly reaction, right?

I'm going to go with yes.

"Hey," I awkwardly interrupt. I really just want to go home, curl up in my bed, and overthink what this newfound giddiness in my belly means.

"Oh, hi Clare!" Jenna immediately drops her hand from Jake's. I roll my eyes and toss my leftover cotton candy into a nearby trashcan.

"You know, I really don't care if you two are dating," I say. It's mostly true. "You don't have to hide it from me. Honestly."

"Oh, we're just friends…" Jenna smiles nervously. "I actually have to go. I'm meeting Alli at the carousel in five minutes to head home. Bye, Clare!" I swear I see a blush come across her face. "Bye, Jake." She waves as she leaves.

I raise an eyebrow at Jake. He shakes his head and motions for me to get in the truck. It's funny, he never opened the door for me when we he was my boyfriend, either. I know I'm fully capable of opening my own door, but sometimes it's nice to know that chivalry isn't dead.

That's ONE thing Eli and I never had a problem with.

Eli. Eli's lips. They're as soft as I remembered…

"You've got a look on your face," Jake surmises as he points the truck towards home. We don't live far from the school.

"Well, every face always has a look on it, Jake." I smirk. "That's why it's called a 'look'."

"Whatever." He rolls his eyes and we finish the ride home in a somewhat comfortable silence.

We pull up in front of the house, and I rush inside. The temperature seems to have dropped several degrees in the past half and hour or so. Maybe I was just warm because I was near Eli; he has always made my blood boil in one way or another…

I shake the thought off and store my winter attire in the front closet. The kitchen beckons; I skipped on 'real food' at the carnival, too nervous to eat around Eli.

I'm rummaging through the fridge when Jake walks in. I roll my eyes, unsurprised. That boy is ALWAYS hungry. I seriously don't think I've ever seen him fully satiated (in any aspect). I open the freezer and hit the jackpot: Ben and Jerry's. I don't care that it's winter or that I've already reached a normal person's sugar quota for the night. I know half-baked ice cream will help me sort out my girlish woes/joys. This is one lesson Alli taught me I will never forget. I grin, thrilled all over again to have my friends back.

I grab a spoon then turn towards the door, but Jake stops me.

"Stay. Let's talk." He sits on the stool against the wall with a bag of chips in his hand.

"Do we HAVE to?" I ask.

"Yes. I feel like bonding with my sister."

"Uh…okay?" I say, not sure how to respond to that. I hop onto the counter and get a big spoonful of ice cream. It slides down my throat and I feel happy. Normal. At ease.

If anyone had asked me a month ago if I'd ever feel this way again, the answer would have been a resounding NO.

"What's on your mind?" I ask my stepbrother. We haven't 'bonded' much since our 'arrest', but I'm not completely opposed to the idea. He probably just wants to complain about Glen; the two have been having minor spats lately. He put up with many of my temper tantrums during our relationship, so I owed at least a sympathetic ear.

"That look on your face." He attempts to smirk. "I've seen it before."

"Oh yeah?" I take another bite. "When was that?"

"The first time I kissed you."

I nearly choke on my snack. "Jake, we don't talk about this stuff." It's true. Jake and I never speak of our relationship; I think it keeps the amicable feelings between us intact.

"So?" He's talking with food in his mouth. Gross. Again, I wonder how I didn't notice this habit before. "Let's talk about it now."

I sigh. "Care to describe this 'look' to me?" This is awkward, but I can't seem to stop myself from having this conversation. I thought I just wanted to contemplate the events of the evening alone, but I'm realizing just how much I want to talk about them. I might need to call Alli. Would she understand? Maybe. I'm not really sure where she stands on a lot of things these days.

Jake smirks again. I note how he's not very good at it. I really need to stop noticing his flaws. I won't cheapen what we had; it meant something to me, even if it was never supposed to last 'forever'.

"Clare, you're an open book." He laughs. "Your eyes are slightly dazed, and you can't erase this faint smile from your face." He looks down. "You're infatuated."

"Oh, please." I point my spoon at him. "You're crazy."

"Really, Clare? You're calling ME crazy?" He lets out a snort of derision. "Remember that night we first met? Well, re-met, I guess." I freeze, waiting for it.

"Jake, come on-"

"DID YOU FLIP A SWITCH AND ERASE ME FROM YOUR MEMORY?" He mocks in a high-pitched voice. "DID YOU EVER LOVE ME AT ALL?"

I'm sure my cheeks are flushed with a vibrant crimson red at this point. The scene he is acting out is certainly NOT one of my proudest moments.

"Jerk," I pout.

He laughs softly. "I'm just kidding, Sis."

"Well, I suppose big brothers are allowed to tease little sisters." I stroke my chin, appearing to be in deep thought. "Though, this means that I, as your little sister, get to be a real pain-in-the-butt whenever I feel like it, and YOU have to grin and bear it."

"What do you think I've been doing for the past few months?"

"Ouch!" We're both doubled over with laughter, and it feels so natural that I'm mad we wasted so much time avoiding one another when we could have been having moments like this one.

"So tell me, who is the lucky guy?"

I freeze with my spoon halfway to my mouth. "Uh…"

"You can tell me, you know."

"Oh really? Well you can tell ME about you and Jenna, you know," I counter. I'm stalling.

"Fine," he throws up his hands. "I think she's cool. We're taking it slow."

"Slow? You? Really?"

"Yes, really. Come on Clare, think about it: she just gave up her KID. I doubt she's ready for anything serious."

I hadn't thought of that. I wonder how she's doing and can't believe I've have asked. I would have a year ago, even if I WAS still a bit angry with her.

"Makes sense," I nod.

"Not to mention the last time I jumped into a relationship my girlfriend's mom married my dad." A sly grin appears on his face. "Too soon?"

"Nah," I wave him off. "Well, I'm glad you two are being smart, I guess. I really do want you to be happy."

"And I want YOU to be happy. So tell me, who is the guy? Is it that Liam dude from the Newspaper?"

"No, Jake, it's not Liam, it's-"

"OH, is it Adam? You really did take a LOT of interest in helping him get ready for that date. Were you jealous? I know you two are friends, but is there something-"

"NO, Jake, it's not Adam." I inhale. "It's Eli." And exhale.

I don't know how long we sit there, looking at one another without saying a word. The comfortable silence from the truck is long gone, and I just want him to say something. Anything. Because I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about any of this, and I really need a second opinion, even if it does come from my ex-boyfriend/stepbrother.

"Say something." My voice is barely audible.

Jake just continues to stare at me. I may be an open book, but he is certainly not. He never has been.

"Jake, I-"

"Were you over him when you and I were together?"

"What? Yes! No…maybe. I don't know."

"I guess it's not fair of me to ask that," he sighs. "So, uh, tell me: how did this happen?"

I think for a moment. How DID this happen? Did it happen when Eli walked into the newsroom? Did it happen when he asked me to have lunch? When I horrifically spilled soup on his pants? At the frostival? Somehow, I don't think any of these answers are the ones I'm looking for.

"I'm not exactly sure," I start, "but I did kiss him tonight."

For some reason I expect an explosion. I don't know why; Jake's never been volatile, so I shouldn't be surprised by his response.

"Huh," he says.

"Huh?" I laugh. "All I can think about is Eli and his lips on mine, and all you have to say is 'huh'?"

"What do you want me to say, Clare?"

"I don't know."

"How do you feel about it?"

"Jake," I sigh, "I don't really know HOW to feel. I guess I know that I should feel scared, worried, confused, and slightly stupid. And maybe on some level, I do. But…"

"But you've got that look on your face."

"Yeah, I know." A beat passes before he speaks.

"What are you going to do about it?"

I have no response for that because the answer is not something I'm ready or willing to consider at the present moment. I just want to go to my room, crawl in bed, and relive tonight over and over again. I simply shrug and head out of the kitchen to do just that.

A/N: Up next: Eli and Fiona!