I had nothing else to do here, so gathered my bag, gave Kurt a quick hug, told him I would text him later, and swiftly left the house leaving behind my ex-lover and my best friend behind me.
Leaving the house, I didn't know how to get home. I had gotten a taxi here, so I was just going to have to walk home, with my thoughts for company.
I wondered how he would take Kurt's relayed message, would he be happy I'm letting him free or would he just be indifferent to the whole situation. I pondered to myself for the whole walk home, lost in thought and so did not realise when I reached home, how much time had flown by me.
I luckily had my key in my purse and so was able to get into the house without any bother. I went straight up to my room so I could lie on my bed and text Kurt.
I'm home fine. Thanks for being there for me today xx
I sent the message and left my phone on my bedside table before looking up to my ceiling above me, thinking about my dreams and what I should do with myself, now that my large dreams of being with Finn had shattered.
Suddenly, below, the doorbell rang. I sighed to myself and reluctantly rolled off the bed to place both feet on my carpet. I slowly made my way downstairs as the doorbell rang again, not rushing because I just didn't feel like pleasing everyone today. Finally reaching the door, I opened it and got the shock of my life. Finn.
What was he doing here? All I could do was stand there and stare at him in shock; I couldn't believe he was here, in front of me.
"Rach, can I come in?" He gives me that look. That look he knows I find really innocent and sweet. Gazing at me with hopeful wide eyes, I just silently move to the side letting him pass before slowly closing the door behind him.
He makes his own way to my room, after being here so many times; he knows our rituals of making our way straight to my room. It seems so far away now, those times we shared together not long ago.
We sit together on my bed, as per usual, but for once there is plenty of space between us to fit another person in between even. As I stared at the floor beneath my feet, I heard him sigh from beside me and move closer. He put his fingers under my chin and brought my face up to his so our eyes locked once again.
"I'm sorry, so sorry for what I said earlier. That was awful of me, it just came out. I was just so angry to see you; you're supposed to be in New York, living out your dream. I can't bear it if I'm keeping you here, away from being the star that you truly are." He told me.
I couldn't shake that horror I had just been feeling though, the pain that was still coursing through my body, it made me angry.
"You think just turning up here saying sorry is just going to wipe away all the hurt you just caused me?" I spat at him, angry tears started rolling down my face which just fuelled my anger further, I was sick of crying because of him.
He had the audacity to look pained himself, "I know it's not enough, nothing I say will ever be enough, I understand that. But I just had to tell you why I did what I did, and hope for your forgiveness. You're such a beautiful person Rachel, I already know I'm not good enough for you." He spoke lowly and softly, and against my best wishes, my feelings inside stirred for him.
"You hurt me, a lot. I can't just forget that." I spoke firmly, fixing my eyes on a spot of my wall on the right side of his head. I new I would unravel if I looked into his eyes now
"I know," He spoke reverently, "Believe me, I know. I completely understand you can't just forgive me off the bat. But I will spend every moment for the rest of my life trying to make it up to you, for as long as you will let me."
I thought for a minute, just thought. It hadn't been possible recently, I had been very sporadic. Making rash decisions, and not thinking anything through. What should I do in this situation?
I decided to follow my heart.
"Finn, I can't forget all the pain I've suffered from, but I'm willing to try and erase that pain with happiness from you, together." I speak honestly, looking at him properly, for the first time in my room. His answering smile lights up his whole face, making me feel relieved.
He suddenly rushed forwards and picked me up into a large hug and consequently spun me around causing me to squeal and let out unintentional giggles. I was much happier now that we had sorted the rift out momentarily.
He soon placed me on the floor gently but then held my pace between his palms and brought his face close to mine. "I want to start making it up to you right away, tomorrow." He told me, "Meet me tomorrow, let's do something together. How about a trip to the bowling alley? Re-live some memories?"
It made me smile a lot, "That's a brilliant idea Finn!" I replied enthusiastically, "See you tomorrow, then."
I basically pushed him out the home; I needed some time to myself to get over the drama of the day. After ushering him out the front door, him stealing a quick peck on his way out, I went back up stairs and threw myself onto my bed with my phone and reiterated the latest Finchel drama to him. After he finished exclaiming loudly in my ear how happy he was that we made up, he gave me some suggestions for what to wear tomorrow and told me to get a good nights rest.
I set my alarm for my usual 6am start, and did my night routine before cuddling up in bed and taking my mind away to peaceful dreams and possibilities for tomorrow; it's a brand new day.
AN: I am so, so, so, SO sorry this chapter took a while to get out! I left school on Friday, had a consequent major hangover on Saturday, my cousin's christening took up all day Sunday then it's been the Queen's Jubilee (I live in the UK – it was a big thing here, proud to be British though).
It also took ages generally just to write this chapter, I wrote about 150 words a day; whereas usually I spurt 1000 words out all in one go.
I'm sorry again; I hope this chapter was okay. Will definitely have the next chapter out in a few days, (its half term this week). Thank you for reading and if you wouldn't mind, please leave a review.