8-Zuko's Gift
Zuko didn't know what to do. Of course he had seen a women cry, he had been married to one. Though Mai had seemed emotionless, he knew exactly what to do when the situation occurred. Katara however….he was clueless. Did she want to be left alone? Or would she want company? If so, would she want his? He stayed by the door watching her, wondering what to do, what to say. The seconds seemed to go by like hours, as his mind raced, tried to think. What could she possibly be crying about? Surely it couldn't be Mai…
Zuko didn't realize he was making so much noise with his shuffling feet, not until Katara turned then. Zuko didn't know what to feel when he saw her face; her blue eyes mixed with red from her tears that fell down her cheeks, wetting them. She said nothing to Zuko's appearance, she simply turned quickly, and raised her hand attempting to wipe her face.
"Katara…" Zuko spoke finally, in a tone that sounded odd to him, quieter.
"I'm sorry," Katara said in a thick voice before he had a chance to say more.
"No, don't apologize." He took a tentative step towards her, wondering how close he should get. He decided on a spot right next to her on the balcony, making sure not to get too close. Despite the tears that fell down her face, her expression was that of hardness, rather than the sadness he had expected. "What's wrong?"
Katara stayed silent for a moment, wondering whether she could confide in Zuko or not. But over the years she couldn't deny that they had grown closer. Especially during the past few weeks; she had comforted him during this hard time. Maybe he could possibly be there for her now…but no. How could he? He was still hurting; it would be selfish of her. She had no more time to think. Taking her silence as a rejection, Zuko said,
"It's ok. You don't have to talk about it. I'll leave you alone."
"No!" she burst out. He had started to turn, but Katara's sudden hand on his arm stopped him. "I mean…" she continued, trailing off. "I was just thinking, I didn't want to burden you with my problems."
"After all you have done for me, it's the least I can do. I can't possibly repay you for the help you have given me over the past few weeks."
Keeping her eyes on Zuko, Katara moved slowly to the ground, crossing her legs when she reached it. Zuko followed, sitting in the same position. He held on his face an expression of passiveness, patience, as he waited for her to speak. Katara exhaled deeply, and averted her eyes to the rising sun.
"It's Aang…" she began. "He left this morning."
Zuko knew this. What he didn't understand was why Katara was crying over it. Aang had left for missions countless times. This must have been something deeper. He remained silent, and as he suspected, Katara continued.
"It's hard to explain but…I feel like we're drifting apart."
Zuko could understand why she was feeling this way. Did she know about that women he saw with Aang yesterday? He didn't want to be the one to confirm her fears. Instead he said the opposite of what he was thinking.
"Aang loves you Katara, he has since the beginning."
"I know, I never doubted it before until a few months ago. He came back from a mission looking so strange…and since then he's been leaving more, telling me less. He used to leave notes for me, letting me know where he was going, but lately…there's been nothing. I've been waking up alone, as if he were never there."
Zuko said nothing, hoping his eyes didn't give away what he was feeling. Katara's relationship with the avatar was deteriorating. And he couldn't help thinking that she deserved better.
"I'm sorry, I didn't know you guys were going through so much."
"Aang doesn't know what I'm feeling. We used to communicate so well, but lately I can't tell him anything! I've never told anyone before now, and I don't know why I continue to let these feelings eat away at me…"
The sun had fully risen now. It shined brightly on both their faces, illuminating the tears now drying on Katara's face, illuminating the golden eyes that were staring at her with concern. He wanted to make her feel better somehow, like she had done for him. But how?
His uncle had always said he had never followed things through; that he just did things without planning them. For the past few years he had been trying to work on that. But this was a different case. For now, he decided to abandon his teachings and just do whatever his heart told him to.
"What are you doing today?" he asked suddenly, breaking the silence.
"Nothing that I know of. If the others have anything planned they didn't tell me."
Zuko grabbed her hand suddenly, making her look up in surprise.
"C'mon," he said, gently pulling her to her feet.
"Where are we going?" she asked as the man lead her away from the balcony and back inside the palace.
"To a place not too many people know about."
They walked throughout the quiet palace, Zuko taking the lead. Katara had always found that particular balcony she was on to be pretty high, but never had she gone higher than the floor of the guest chambers. Just out of politeness for Zuko, she never went wandering. So everything was new to her as they continued up to the higher floors. She thought about questioning him again. But something in her knew he wouldn't breathe a word about the location. She couldn't help but wonder why he was doing this.
They finally reached a landing, of what Katara assumed to be the highest floor of the palace. The windows through the hall were surprisingly tall, reaching from the floor to the ceiling. If she were alone, she would have stopped to admire the view from them. But Zuko kept up the pace, leading her through the hallway to the rooms beyond it.
"The room I'm about to show you, only a few people have gone into. Not even Azula knows about it. And my father especially doesn't know about it."
Katara listened, now noticing how quiet it was, how quiet he was. There was nobody up here, just the two of them. All the sadness she felt earlier seemed to melt away, nerves replacing it. What was this room Zuko was going to show her?
He stepped in front of a tall door, a regular door that didn't require firebending to open it. It only needed a key, which Zuko pulled out. When Zuko opened the door, it creaked from the lack of use, and a small layer of dust flew up into the air. Zuko went in first, seeming to disappear inside the dark room. It wasn't until he lit a candle, that Katara could see what was in the room.
It was large, larger than she had imagined, with more tall windows like the ones she saw in the hallway, however these had curtains around them, thick red curtains. Easels and canvases littered the floors, paintings covered the walls. Paint, brushes, and every kind of art material imaginable was in this room; it was an artist's dream. There were some finished paintings, some left unfinished, but all of them were beautiful, the most magnificent art that Katara had ever seen.
"Zuko…did you do all of this?" she asked, slightly in awe. Her eyes moved to Zuko who stood in a corner of the room with a small smile.
"No," he responded. "My mother did them."
Katara raised her eyebrows. She had never known too much about his mother. Only that she had been banished from the firenation, all to protect Zuko. But she knew nothing about her life, her hobbies, painting obviously, being one of them. Ursa was very talented.
"Wow, these paintings are amazing!" Katara eyed one on the far wall. It was a young Zuko and Azula, back when they were young, innocent. They two of them were sleeping, and painted so magnificently, it looked like a photo. She eyed another which was scenery, it looked like the beaches of Ember Island. The water was painted so well, she could almost see them crashing against the beach. "Your mother was very good."
"Yes," Zuko agreed, moving to stand beside Katara. "She loved painting. Every time she got a spare moment, or just needed to get away from my father…she was up here."
Katara turned to face him, with a small smile. She was glad that he felt comfortable enough to show her this. But still, as warmed as she was by this gesture, she couldn't help wondering why he had brought her here.
"Why are you showing me this?" she asked, voicing her thought.
"Because I want to give you something." Zuko brushed past her, moving towards the back of the room, disappearing behind the numerous easels. But Katara could still hear him as he talked.
"While Mai was sick, she spent most of the time in bed sleeping. So to occupy myself, take my mind of things, I picked up my mother's hobby."
He returned with what looked like a smaller painting, almost handheld.
"I'm not as good as my mother, but…here." He handed it to her, face down.
She felt her heart increase a little as she took it, wondering what it could be. What kinds of things would Zuko paint? She flipped it over, and gasped at the sight, all her thoughts of Aang evaporating completely. It was a picture of someone, an unknown figure waterbending, but in a beautiful way. The water wrapped around the person in powerful curves, wrapping around the form of the figure. The figure was small, most of what could be seen was the water, but still Katara could make out the strength in the person's arms showing they had complete control. The scenery around it was breathtaking, droplets from the water fell onto the grass, making it shine from the sun. Flowers, dozens of them surrounded the person, adding even more beauty. Katara was amazed, completely at the style of it and time that went into creating this piece of artwork.
"Zuko…I…its beautiful," she managed out after a moment.
"You like it?" Zuko asked, trying to hide his nerves. He had worked on it for hours, started over more times than he could count.
"I love it…," she tore her eyes away from the painting, looking up at Zuko, the artist. "You picked up your mother's talent." Zuko smiled, matching hers.
"Not too many people know this, but she used to teach me. She would take me up here and we would paint together. Its one of the few happy memories I have…anyway, I wanted you to have this, for everything you have done for me."
"Thank you," she said, instantly getting up on her toes and wrapping her arms around him. Zuko, a little surprised at the sudden contact took a moment before he slowly placed his arms around her delicate waist. He almost felt his head spinning; her hair brushed against his hands and it was just as he had imagined. And her scent…he wanted to inhale deeply, capture as much of her as he could. When she released him, it felt too soon. And as he looked down, at her smiling face that admired the work he did, his eyes wandered to her lips. Nice, full lips that he suddenly wanted to taste…what was happening to him? He took a couple steps back, trying to think of something to break the silence.
"Are you hungry?"
Katara glanced up, a smile still on her face. "Well I wasn't when I got up…but now I kinda am," she said, clutching slightly at her stomach.
Zuko led her out of the room, and when she was in the hallway, he closed the door and locked it once again. Katara glanced back as the two left the hallway, the room they had just left blended in so well with the others. No one would guess that such beauty lay behind it. It was quiet between them for the next few moments as they walked, ascending back down stairs. The only thing really audible was their footsteps. Unknown to Katara, Zuko was trying to control his breathing, trying to slow down his heart.
She really liked it…
"Hey Zuko," Katara said, breaking the silence. "Who is this person in the picture?"
"No one in particular," Zuko said, quicker than he meant to. He was answering honestly; when he started the painting, it wasn't intended to be any certain person, just a waterbender. But what he didn't reveal, was that over time, the more he had looked at his completed painting, the more he could see Katara within it.