Does anybody even read the authors notes at the top of the page? I DON'T. pooooooo poooooooooo pooooooooooooooooooooooo bummy bum bum. ANYBODY OUT THERE???!!!! Guess not. –giggle giggle-

"I am the Goblin King, dammit, let me in!" Jareth paced back and forth angrily in front of the grimy dwarf.

"If you were REALLY the Goblin King, you wouldn't be running the Labyrinth. You'd be INSIDE." The dwarf cast him a condescending look and shook his head at the stranger's foolishness. Jareth gave a little scream in exasperation and stomped perilously close to the dwarf's foot.

"If you MUST know, I was locked out."

"If you're really the Goblin King, you could open the door yourself!" the dwarf countered.

"You know just as well as I do that the door can't be open OR found by magic, and that the Doorkeeper is the only one who can open it!"

"Your point being…?"

"Where is Higgle?"

"Hoggle?"

"Yes. WHERE IS HE?" Jareth crouched down to look the dwarf in the eye and bared his sharp teeth menacingly. The dwarf, unfazed, returned the glare.

"Sick. I'm his replacement, Gog." Gog thumped his small fist into his chest.

"And I'm supposed to care WHY? I am your KING, and I am COMMANDING YOU to let me in!" the skies darkened, lightning flashed, wind raged and suddenly there were crows flying all around His Royal Viciousness' wild blond hair.

"Yes, yes, you're very intimidating." Gog waved his hand dismissively at the now ruffled Goblin King and rolled his bloodshot eyes. "But the REAL Goblin King is much more…SPARKLY." Jareth groaned and threw his hands in the air, showering glitter over the barren landscape.

"Good 'nuff." Gog waved his hand again at the wall, and a door appeared and creaked open. Jareth stalked inside, cursing Sarah. Not that he'd admit it, but the clever girl locked him out.

It's so short!!! I KNOW I KNOW I'm evil. I'm sorry I haven't updated for a while, but I was on holiday, so I couldn't. Moving on…lessee, reviewers this time can have…um…a Wheel of Destiny? A trolley full of salmon? The spinning teacup ride from Disneyland? Never miiiiiiiiiind.

This is the start of a series where Jareth tries to get through the Labyrinth. Suggestions?

I thought you guys might be getting a bit tired of parodies, so VOILA!

love,

k