A/N: Welcome back, faithful viewers to our regularly scheduled… Oops. Sorry. Wrong script. Ok… Hello faithful readers. Here's a cookie for everyone. Yay! I'm not gonna say much today, so, on with the show! I will say, however, that if I have a chapter finished, I will not be able to update this weekend. I will be on a youth retreat!

Warnings: France's perviness/Various people's mouths

Chapter Start

Arthur awoke to the scent of hamburgers right in his face. Apparently, Alfred had decided to hug the Brit in his sleep and was squishing his face against his chest. Not pleasant. Arthur blushed and tried to escape.

"Ack, Alfred! You git, I can't breathe!" the Englishman cried.

Alfred yawned. "Huh?" he asked lazily.

"Let bloody freaking go!"

"Oh, sorry Artie…" Alfred released Arthur.

Arthur growled and sat up. "I think you broke my spine…" he muttered.

Alfred sat up as well. He had practically smothered himself against the wall during the night. "But you're just so squishable!"

"Shut up!" The Brit snarled. He froze when he heard Francis yawn.

"Oh, good morning Angleterre…Alfred, why are you 'ere?" Francis asked, still half asleep.

"Well, you see, there was this whole thing last night about Mattie going missing but he really wasn't and I almost got caught by the hall monitor and ended up in here." Alfred explained.

Francis processed this. Then he woke up totally. "Ahh! Arzur! You let 'im sleep wiz you? I zought I was special!"

This thoroughly confused the American. "Wait…so, you're saying that you an Artie-"

"Nothing ever happened between either of us!" Arthur shouted, talking to both Alfred and Francis. "You've both said quiet enough now. Francis, you bloody frog, you're as special as the gum stuck to the bottom of my shoe. And Alfred invaded my personal space and there was no way I was sleeping on the floor or anywhere near you."

Francis looked disappointed.

Alfred still just looked confused. "Well, I'm gonna go so you two can work out this little marital dispute." He took his coat and quickly left.

"Wha…'marital dis-' we're not married, bloody wanker!" Arthur cried.

"Ohonhonhonhon~ But you wish we were…" Francis purred.

"Wait, Alfred, on second thought, I'll go with you." Arthur shoved his way through the pretty much closed door and slammed it on Francis' nose.

"I swear…he gets creepier everyday…" the Englishman muttered as they walked. "Look, that whole thing never happened, got it? If anybody asks, you slept on the floor."

Alfred nodded. "Got it."

"Good…" Arthur was cut off by a loud squeal.

Elizabeta sprinted down the hall and stopped in front of the two. "So, how long have you been secretly dating?" She asked casually.

"Huh?" Alfred asked.

"Well, I just figured cause of well, you know…last night…" She explained.

"How in God's name did you know about that?" Arthur yelped.

"Francis posted it on Facebook like a minute ago." Elizabeta showed them her phone.

Francis Bonnefoy
Arthur Kirkland and Alfred Jones slept in the same bed last night. I knew there was something between them…

Today at 6:39

Arthur growled and pulled out his phone.

Arthur Kirkland commented on Francis Bonnefoy's wall post
Nothing happened, you pervert. I tried to make him sleep on the floor.

Francis Bonnefoy commented on his own post, 15 seconds ago.
Sure you did… *rolls eyes*
10 people like this

Alfred Jones
No you didn't, Artie. You just crawled right in next to me like when we were little kids…

Gilbert I'mawesome Beilschmidt
Hey, Artie, are you gay? Like Toni?

Antonio F. Carrido
Hey! Just because I love Lovi doesn't mean I'm gay!

Gilbert I'mawesome Beilschmidt
Ja, it kinda does….
8 people like this

Lovino Vargas
Tomato-*******! Don't go tagging me in everything you post!

Arthur Kirkland
Good grief!

Arthur Kirkland has logged out

Arthur stormed off down the hall, throwing his phone down out of disgust. Elizabeta bent down and picked up said phone.

"Hey, El, I don't think you should take his phone." Alfred said.

"Hey, look! Superman!" Elizabeta cried, pointing off in a random direction.

"Oh my gosh, where?" Alfred shouted, looking around.

Elizabeta laughed under her breath and ran off with Arthur's phone. This'll be perfect! She thought. Wow, he even set it to remember his password! He obviously didn't think that I'd ever steal his phone. She snuck back to her dorm.

Lilli looked up as her roommate entered the room. "Isn't that Arthur's phone?" She asked.

"He's letting me borrow it." Elizabeta lied.

Arthur Kirkland has changed their status to 'in a relationships with Alfred Jones'

Oh, the fun I can have with this… She thought as she flipped through the notes that Arthur had carelessly left undeleted that contained all his passwords.

Matthew was quite startled when the door was slammed open. He was also surprised when Arthur walked in. "Umm…can I help you, Arthur?"

"No, not really…unless you can universally delete Facebook posts and make everyone forget that they saw it…" Arthur sighed.

"Sorry… I can't, but what happened?" The Canadian asked politely.

Arthur hesitated. "Stupid Francis went and posted on bloody Facebook that I slept with your brother last night…" he growled quietly.

Matthew's jaw dropped. "You didn't, did you? Oh my syrup, is Al-"

Arthur cut him off. "We didn't in the way that Francis means it…and I'm not so sure about Alfred…"

The other boy nodded. "That's fine…I'm not so sure about him either."

"What aren't you sure about?" Alfred asked from the doorway.

"Oh, ahh…we aren't sure that you should be eating as much as you do." Matthew quickly covered.

"Well, I'm a big country. I need to be well fed!" Alfred said, smiling. His smile dropped when he saw the look on his friends' faces. "What?"

"Alfred, you just said 'country.'" Arthur said.

"Huh? You sure?" Alfred asked. "Hah! I had a speail!"

"Speail?" Matthew asked.

"Yeah, a speech fail." Alfred explained.

"Wouldn't that be a spail?" Arthur asked, cringing at the mutilation of the English language.

"No, that's a spelling fail." The American argued.

Arthur raised his hands in defeat. "Fine…"

"The hero is victorious once again! Take that, Iggy!" Alfred cheered.

"Iggy? Where in God's name did you get that from?" the Brit asked.

"I don't know…it just seemed to fit you…"

"I don't mean to interrupt…but shouldn't we be getting to breakfast?" Matthew asked quietly.

"Yeah, I'm starving, let's go!" Alfred practically dragged the other two down the hall.

"Wait a tick…" Arthur muttered as they walked outside. "Where's my phone?"

"Oh, um, Eliza took it…" Alfred confessed.

"****!" Arthur swore loudly. "Do you know what she could do to my social life?"

The American shrugged.

"I need a favor…" The Englishman muttered quietly.

"What was that?" Alfred asked.

"I need you to do something for me, ******! I need you to ask Gilbert to distract Elizabeta so I can take back my phone."

"Sure, but why Gilbert?"

"He's good at ticking off Roderich, which ticks off Eliza."

"Will do!" Alfred agreed as they entered the cafeteria.

The three received their food, (yes, Matthew is still there), Alfred sat next to Gilbert, Arthur sat next to Elizabeta, and Matthew sat wherever there was an open seat.

"Hey, Gil, I need a favor. Well, Artie needs a favor, but he wanted me to ask." Alfred whispered to Gilbert.

"Oh, so now you're his messenger as vell?" Gilbert asked "Ok, vhat do you vant?"

"We need you to distract Eliza. I don't really care what the heck you do, but Artie needs time to steal back his phone." Alfred ignored the first part of Gilbert's sentence.

"Kesesesesese~" Gilbert laughed, smiling. "Ok, vill can do."

Alfred nodded. "Thanks, bro,"

Gilbert leaned over and tapped Roderich on the shoulder repeatedly. "Hey, hey, Roddy. Roddy, hey, hey, over here."

Roderich closed his eyes, sighing. "Go away, Gilbert…"

"But, Roddy…" Gilbert whined. He waited until Roderich wasn't looking and messed up the Austrian's hair so that it looked like his own.

Roderich yelped in surprise. "Gilbert, you moron! Do you know how long it took to fix my hair this morning?"

Gilbert got up and ran, and Roderich chased after him.

"Gilbert! How dare you mess up his beautiful hair?" Elizabeta cried, jumping up and chasing them, leaving Arthur's phone on the chair.

Arthur quickly leaned over and grabbed his phone, checking the damage done.

"How bad is it?" Alfred asked, leaning over.

"Nothing I can't fix…" Arthur muttered, leaning away.

Arthur Kirkland has changed their status to 'single and forever straight as a ruler'

A/N: Sorry, but that's totally something that Francis would do. I mean, seriously, think about it. Anyway, Facebook can be a terrible thing, or it can be epic. And always count on your friends to tick people off for you.

This was mostly just a little filler chapter, I realized as I was writing it, but we got a little plot in there.

Well, Alfred had quite the little slip-up, didn't he? Perhaps he's started to realize who he is, subconsciously.

Well, I didn't exactly get enough reviews last time to free Iggy, so, Maka, you'd better gather up your troops if you want him back.

Roderich: Terach does no own Hetalia or any of the moron countries…

Terach out. Peace!