"Anne."

I sat there. Stared at the phone.

I slept with Daniella. I'm leaving you.

Now that the words had gotten into my brain, they were echoing around in there, over and over and over, taking over almost every part of my head. Leaving you. Slept with Daniella. Leaving you. Daniella. Leaving.

Someone really shook me, shook me so hard my head flopped around, and I blinked to see I was in Reece's lap. I wasn't even sure when this had happened. Sounds were coming out of my mouth, though nothing that could be seen as a word, and Reece stared at me like I'd gone nuts.

I'd never had anyone leave me. I didn't know what to do. The phone was still against my head, Reece couldn't get it off, he was trying to as hard as he could. I felt it crack and break, I was holding it so hard, felt it fall to pieces.

I didn't fall to pieces.

I got up, walked downstairs, hearing Reece follow right behind me. Ice cream. Spoon. Outside. Some part of me was aware that I was heading for Forestwatch, that I was heading for home, that I was ...I didn't know. Nothing made sense to me right now. Nothing. Reece yanked at my arm hard, trying to get me to turn around, but with the chocolate ice cream in my mouth and the cold tub under one arm, I ignored him as I tried to head for the fence between the properties. Reece was speaking but whatever he was saying, it made no sense any more, it was just noise. Noise in the background.

I struggled, trying to get over the fence, a leg over when I smelt the sudden stench of fear from Reece. Something hard hit my head. A fist. Striking me so hard that I fell back, shocked, Reece catching me and twisting my arms behind my back as he dragged me back from the fence. There it was, there that thing was, and it had been inches from me. Inches. And yet I was so numb...

I wanted the monster to hurt me.

The realisation shook me so much, as Reece dragged me back, his hands digging in so hard he left bloody trails, that I for a moment felt fear. Horror. But the thing didn't follow us. It tried and it couldn't get past the fence. I heard Reece's noise become swearing, just for a few seconds, as he hoisted me over his shoulder and forced me back to Stonehaven.

Or he tried to. I struggled and he was forced to drop me halfway, instead pinning me there, his face red and shiny with the effort of it. There was a bruise on his face. Had I done that? Maybe I had. I had been thrashing, I had this vague suspicion, but he had been carrying me and what had he expected?

I'm leaving you. I slept with Daniella.

Reece had the phone out and I heard Nick's voice.

That did it. I grabbed the phone, grabbed it so hard it cracked, and slammed it against the tree, over and over and over, till it and my fingers were bloody and broken. It wasn't just my fingers though. Reece had put his hand between my hand and the tree, trying to protect my hand, and I'd slammed his hand …

I felt something in my head snap, time seemed to go back to a normal speed, and stared at Reece as he knelt there, breathing hard, his hand bloody as it gently pushed my hand away from the bloody bark.

"Anne, come on. Snap out of it." He spoke, soft, his other hand holding my arm as hard as he could. "Speak to me. Talk. Come back."

"I... I slept with Daniella. I'm leaving you." The words slipped out.

He blinked at me, completely confused by this. "You did?"

"Nick. Nick said it. Nick left me a message. Nick sle..." I couldn't say it. I couldn't put Nick's name with the words.

"That's fucking impossible." Reece's face darkened though, he tugged me up, bending over me as if he could protect me from the world. "Not possible. Nick wouldn't do that. Dani wouldn't do that."

I didn't answer. I'd heard it, I'd heard the words, and now I couldn't unhear them.

Instead, I curled up in a ball on the ground, sliding out of his arms, wrapping my arms around my legs. It was too much to believe.

A hand brushed across my shoulders, gently, Reece trying to get me to stand.

"Anne, it's got to be a joke. It's okay." He was saying. I barely heard it.

I curled up tighter, eyes shutting, the feeling of rain pelting down on us. Not possible. The world didn't make sense. Nothing did. Nothing at all.

A hand turned my head up, the rain coming down to meet my hot face, to mix with the tears I hadn't realised I was crying. Reece's lips found mine, his hand refusing to let me pull away, kissing me so hard that I struggled to breathe.

"Anne, it's okay. It's going to be okay." He was speaking, between kisses, tugging me into his lap, arms hugging me hard against his chest. I buried my head into Reece's neck, crying openly now, the words ricochet around everything tender or ...I told Nick. He was my world. I'd lost everything and then he'd come for me. "I'll talk to him. Come with me."

He helped me up, literally having to help lift me up, an arm around me as we made our way into the silent house. We didn't go into my bedroom, I couldn't, we went into the last empty one that no one had used for months. No scents. Nothing. Reece left with the phone- if I heard Nick's voice again, I would snap the phone again- and I sat there, face wet with more than just the rain, staring at the wall. Just... staring.

Reece was yelling. I heard it, as I curled up, vaguely aware that he was yelling and that Jeremy was awake and that twins were awake and crying. I lay on my side on the bed, only getting up to lock the door and shove the bed against it so it couldn't be opened and re-curled up, eyes shut, refusing to listen anymore. To anything.

I wanted the drug. I wanted it so badly...

Sleep came so easily. Or had I changed? I wasn't sure. I just knew I was curled up.

My mate.

Reece wasn't my mate.

As much as I loved him, as much as I trusted him, Reece was not my mate. Deep down in my instincts I knew this. He was hot, I loved it when he shared me with Nick, but without Nick/ It wouldn't work. A shrink might have a lot to say about that but for me?

I wanted my mate. No other person was allowed in the room suddenly. Not Reece, not the twins, not Jeremy. No one.

What if I was wrong? Reece thought Daniella was his mate and she didn't feel like that. What if I was the only one who felt it? Or something?

A banging on the door, the door attempting to get past the bed, and I ignored it. Ignored all of them. This was not right. Nick … wouldn't do this.

But he had. He had done it once. I'd made myself forget. Once, months ago, he had been with another woman in some alley behind the club. Claimed he had no idea what was going on. Now he was doing it again. And to Daniella of all people? I trusted her. Crazy, after what she'd done to Reece, but she'd then turned around and been a huge support while I'd freaked out during the last pregnancy.

Suddenly I didn't really feel a difference between wolf or human. Both were hurt, I was neither human or wolf right now, and the pain in my chest covered changes. My mind was so chaotic, so busy with thoughts, that I wasn't really aware of when I changed or not.

Nick was the last one. It wasn't going to be any other way for me. It didn't matter if he left me now or died in thirty or forty years. There was only going to be one from start to finish. Anyone else, being Reece, only came in when that one was there.

I felt my body under springs and mattress, saw I was changed at this point, and curled around so my muzzle was in my side. Shut my eyes. Something was going on. I didn't know what it was, I didn't know how to care, I just ...lay there. Ignored the door. Ignored everything. I almost wanted to die then and there and didn't care how pathetic this sounded.

The voice echoed around my head, echoing so loudly that the noises outside made no sense, the words the only things I could cope with.

It got dark, it got light, it got dark, and I didn't notice or care, I crawled into the closet, I lay naked on the bed, or maybe I was fur again. Or I snuck to the bathroom when no one was around. That seemed to be a lot more now.

A fist struck my face so hard that I was knocked clean off the bed, Clayton hoisting me up hard, Reece trying to yank his hands off me. Another fist, another knee, and I stared blankly at him, welcoming it. I didn't know or hear what he was saying. Reece was yelling at him though, so angry looking, getting in between us.

"Where's my kids, Anne."

The words took some time to come through my head. He was saying them, as he really got into me, his breathing hard and fast, no control there. Just rage. Something about Jeremy. Where were the kids?

I blinked, trying to come out of the daze I'd been in, trying to focus.

Reece pulled mebehind him, I heard a fist hit him instead, his grunt of pain cutting through the haze.

"I don't care if Nick fucking slept with Jeremy. My children are gone."

"What?" The shock of my own voice was nothing compared to that. I blinked, tried to focus, tried to come back to reality. It was day. There was ...nothing in the house. Nothing at all. No. There was, there was Elena, I could hear her. Going through the house at a run, frantic. "What do you mean?"

"Jeremy is gone. The children are gone. All of the children. What the fuck happened? We trusted you to protect them."

"Clay!" Elena's voice came, so panicked, from their room.

Clayton swore, shovign the bed hard against a wall, yanking the door open and leaving. He shot me such a disgusted look, so angry, that I cringed.

Reece wrapped a blanket around me, hugging me against him, kissing my head.

"What?" I asked, confused, shaking.

"I don't know. I went to New York and ...when I came back, the house was empty. Everyone was gone except you."

Everyone was gone.

That was impossible. Or was it? I'd been so dazed, so lost, so much in my head, the house could have been on fire and I wouldn't have noticed till I was on fire with it.

"Why did you go?" I asked, shutting my eyes, curling up against him. I felt sick.

"To kill Nick." The word threatened to topple me back into the abyss I'd been in. Instead, Reece squeezed hard, his face in mine. "Don't you freak out, Anne. Don't you dare. Your twins are missing. Matt's missing. Focus. I know you can do it."

My twins. Matt. Images, faces I'd shoved out with Nick's face crowding, and I tried to do what he said. Focus on them. Get Nick somewhere else.

"Fucking pathetic. I didn't react like this when Elena left." Clayton was coming back in, so angry, so damn angry. "Get the fuck out of my home. Go. I don't care what Elena says."

"Clayton, cal-" Reece tried to block him, and Clayton shoved him aside.

"I said, get out."

"What did you do?" Anger was rising now. It was probably anger at Daniella and Nick, more than likely, but it was rising so fast that it shocked me. Life was coming back into my head with it. "Beat up some Mutts? Kill them?"

"So what if I fucking did? I said, out of my home. This isn't your pack. You can't defend it, you don't belong in it." Clayton shoved Reece back again, his hand closing around my throat, lifting me up. "I should fucking..."

"Fuck you, Clayton. I don't use anger to deal with my grief." I spat, struggling against his hand only a moment, then going limp. His hand tightened and I let it . Shut my eyes.

Elena's hand went over his, I smelt it, felt it, half expected it to tighten with his. Instead, she was gently peeling the fingers away from my throat, and he wasn't resisting her. She was so calm compared to him, though the tears on her face broke my heart, and I …

I got it then. Our children.

"They're gone?"

Elena nodded and I broke down, the emotions of the past few days making it so easy, her arms coming around to grab me and hold on. There wasn't any anger from her, at least not at me, just the grief.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Elena. I..."

"Reece told us. Clay, calm down. They're her children too. Someone attacked her too."

"I don't remember what happened. I don't remember."

"Paige said the entire house was under something to confuse. It's okay. It's not completely your fault." Not completely. The words, in her soft voice, it broke my heart all over again. I'd really screwed up. Elena's twins. My twins. Matt. Nick could sleep with the whole damn world and I should never have gotten distracted.

"Don't fucking tell her that. It was completely her fault. Why the fuck have we wasted our time with her if she can't focus and do her job? We're not her parents" Clayton growled, his fist going right through the door, and he tore it apart as we knelt there, shaking. "And where were you?" He turned onto Reece, unable to take it out on me now.

"Killing Nick."

"Did you succeed?"

My eyes opened and I saw Reece shake his head, his eyes on us, lips pursed as the anger was there.

"Clay, focus on the timing." Elena said, softly. "What if it wasn't Nick?"

"It was Nick." Reece muttered. He didn't join us, just kicked at the door. "I talked to him. Beat him up a bit. It was Nick."

"I don't have the fucking time for this. I've got kids to find." Clayton took off downstairs. He didnt' even look at me now.

"He'll calm down. Nick ...shouldn't have …" Elena shook her head, standing, and I tried to stand too. "Shower and dress, focus, help us. That's an order. You have to help us."

She went downstairs with Nick and I stood there, numb, as Reece tried to get clothing for me. He followed me into the bathroom, refusing to leave when I got into the water, arms crossed and eyes fixed on me. Guarding me? It felt like it.

He moved closer as I stood there in the hot water, eyes shutting, and his arm went past me.

Cold water suddenly exploded all over me, making me gasp in shock, conciousness really coming into me now. I nearly fell over as I tried to get out of the shower.

He might have laughed another time but instead, he grabbed me before I slipped, and his hands cupped my face gently.

"You okay?"

I shook my head, smiled weakly, trying to get myself to focus on being here again. "I can dress."

Memories of sitting there, on that bench, shaving Nick... of Matt watching once... I shut my eyes, pain washing through me, the loss of Nick so huge in my head that I was struggling to get that my children were gone too. A hand lifted my foot and I blinked, staring down, Reece trying to dress me.

"Thirty seconds and you haven't moved. We're hurrying, remember?"

Shit. I dressed as fast as I could and followed him downstairs. He kept glancing back, as if he was making sure I was, but I was doing my best to focus now .

Clayton was right. No one had been here for at least two days. How long had I been like that? He and Elena were already outside, Clayton sniffing, Elena standing there in the same daze I was, Paige beside her. She glanced at me, reaching out, no anger or blame there. Clayton didn't even look up, just growled softly, too angry to even bother with words.

"I don't … the rain's fucking up trails." Clayon growled. "I'm going to change."

"Don't attack Anne."

He glowered at me, as if he was tempted to do just that, but he didn't say anything. Stalked off into the woods.

"We can't go to Forestwatch." I said, softly, and Elena blinked at me.

"What, why?" Apparently no one had told her this.

Reece stepped over. "There's something there. It spooked Jamie and Kristoff told her to stay away from there till she was cured."

Elena nodded, a stiff sharp nod. "We won't go."

"Why are you here? I mean, how?" My eyes went from her to Paige. They were in Washington, last I'd heard, when had they come back? "Did you get him?"

"We had to abandon that state. They wouldn't allow us to fly in. If he's in there, he's stuck. No one answered the phone here so... we called Paige and she came here ahead of us. You wouldn't wake. She tried to wake you. What did Nick's message say exactly?" Elena glanced to Reece.

I couldn't say it. Reece said it for me and I cringed, even now.

"That doesn't sound right." She muttered. "Two small sentences? Did he ..."

"He said it to me too. So did Daniella." Reece crossed his arms, glanced at me, and stepped closer. There was that guarding thing again. "I didn't question them more. If I did, I'd …" For a second, the anger on his face could have matched the anger Clayton had directed at me. "I got the treatment."

This made my head swing up and I stared at him. He grimaced as Elena hit him hard. "I had to get it. I knew Anne wasn't going to be okay. Fucking Nick... I got it, I got back as fast as I could. You were arriving."

"I should help track." I muttered. She shook her head.

"No. We're looking. Clayton isn't going to let you." Elena grimaced as the big blonde dog came out, his teeth bared at me, and I stepped back. He was right. I'd fucked up big time. "We'll find them."

"No, I have to look." I stepped into the house, ignored Elena's call to come back, hearing Reece hurry after me. I wasn't even sure where I was going. Teeth tried to grab me, Clayton, and I moved faster. Slammed the front door in Clayton's face as he tried to drag me back outside. I had to find Matt. Matt was smart- he ...where would he go, if they were being attacked? I dragged Reece into the basement, shut the door behind us, and started to strip.

"Hold that shut. I'll only be a second." I snapped, Reece hesitated, and nodded. He held onto the door after locking it.

"Want me to change?"

"One of us needs thumbs." It was easier. Reece nodded and I hurried down the stairs to change there on the ground.

Clayton did not follow us. Neither did Elena. They probably had bigger things to worry about now than me, and now that I'd snapped back into action, I really had to snap into action. No more 'fucking around'. There were some missing kids and babies, and Jeremy, and while I knew Clayton was right- I'd screwed up- he wasn't going to be thinking clearly right now either. Jeremy was his father and those were his kids.

I nuzzled against Reece's side, affection for him spilling over now that I was wolf-nature, and he brushed his hand through the thick fur before we headed back out. I had more or less adopted him as a 'second mate', apparently, though ...nothing could replace Nick. Nothing. I had one mate and one mate only.

I growled, shook my head, like I was trying to shake a flea out. Shook hard. My mate was my mate, no matter what he said, no matter what he did. That was all there was to it. If he wanted to pretend otherwise then he was sick. The urge to go to him may have overwhelmed my control if it wasn't for that fact that right now, my puppies and my Alpha's puppies were under direct threat. They took priority over wayward mates.

We headed outside and a golden body ploughed into me, snarling, snapping, growling, going for my neck. I didn't fight back. I dropped down to my belly, rolled over, tail between my legs as Clayton attacked, Reece swearing as he backed off.

It was what he needed to see. He was right. I was wrong. I was entirely at his punishment. Teeth sunk through the skin enough to rip it, though he backed off, teeth bared, and then started for the woods along the faint trail he'd located amongst the mud and dirt. Then he glanced back. Waited.

I got up, shook, and followed behind him, tail and ears still down, remaining submissive as I followed Clayton's lead.

The trail led through the forest. Matt was leading it, Kate and Logan right behind him, leading them through land that wouldn't catch scent. Frequently we had to stop and we had to circle, Clayton and I trying to re-pick up the scent, Reece using his height to check. He was doing his best to make sure no one could follow him, Matt, circling over the land several times, creating scent trails that criss-crossed and confused our senses. It took over an hour at one point, where he had made Logan and Kate circle and circle and circle, till we found out where it ended.

We reached the border and both I and Reece froze, as we felt that cold sense come over us. Clayton seemed to hesitate too, glancing at Forestwatch's land, looking to Reece as he said softly what was there.

But Matt, Logan and Kate had crossed here. And it was daylight. They might have hidden here. I didn't know.

We smelt something else though. Something that I recognised long before Clayton did. Suddenly I took off into the forest, ahead, chasing the other scent. Clayton easily overtook me, Reece hurrying behind us, his own nose catching onto it now. Demetruis. Demetruis was here. Had been here. More recently. Maybe just a few hours. The smell was so strong, compared to the scent of the kids... and it'd come from the road. He'd come onto the road, gotten lost, and had found the fence and the little trail we used between houses.

Clayton nudged me, no trace of anger now, just purpose. However badly I'd fucked up this past year, however many bad choices, I knew that as long as I refused to give up and follow his orders, he'd prefer me to keep trying. Maybe that was why he was so angry. I'd given up- I hadn't fought Nick. He didn't understand 'giving up' when it came to grief. He only understood the need to keep moving. I stopped when he stopped and he swung his head around. I heard it. Something following us. Something small.

Reece froze too, glancing back. His heart increased. He was afraid, afraid of that thing, and so was I.

Clayton nudged me and I moved sideways, as he and Reece continued onwards, and I moved slowly through the bush. Carefully placed each paw, as the small paws traced after us, inhaling slowly. Matt. He was stalking us.

Relief flooded me and I slid closer to him, his senses only picking me up when I moved into the wind blowing at him, the little wolf head twisting around. I half expected him to be feral, or something, but he whined, racing over, crawling under me and rolling over. He was ratty, covered in burs, like he'd been a wolf for the entire two days he'd been here. Maybe he had. I inhaled, slowly, shutting my eyes as I pushed my nose against his fur, fighting the urge to groom him all over. His paws were bloody, teeth bloody, and he curled up against me, trembling, the stench of fear and stress coming from him. Matt had done his best.

Clayton's call, a howl that went down into my deepest body, came from Forestwatch. Body trembling, I shut my eyes, throwing back my head as my body automatically responded. Matt stood up too, ears pricking, and he was right beside me as I took off, racing for Forestwatch, seeing owls literally surrounding it. Sitting on it. Sitting on the fence. They were all over the place and …

They were on Demetruis. Not around him. I growled, fur rising, half expecting them to belong to him. But nothing. No, he was being held there, the claws sinking in, but he wasn't moving. I didn't hear his heart, I didn't hear anything, except that he was very still. Inside and out. The owls still stayed put. There were six of them, huge birds, huge angry looking birds.

And inside...

Clayton paced around the house, his teeth bared as the birds warded him off, and I saw why. Inside, Kate and Logan were at the window, waving. Waving? Jeremy too. Matt growled, as one of the owls swooped at him, and I snapped at it as the claws came dangerously close to him. Maybe that was why he had bloody cuts on his back. I breathed out, slowly, as Jeremy came out. He seemed unharmed. When he embraced Clayton, the owls took off, middle of the day, flying off as if this was a perfectly natural thing. But they didn't go far.

It was like they were guarding Jeremy and the twins, I realised with a shock. Guarding them? They'd attacked the monster thing too.

Reece hoisted Demetruis up off the ground. He flopped, head rolling around, and I could tell he'd been dead for a few minutes. Jeremy threw a sheet at Reece, who took it and wrapped him up, before the twins came out. They didn't look at the dead body in the sheet, their eyes were on their dad, clinging to his fur with both arms.

Jeremy came over to me and Matt, kneeling, reaching out gently for Matt.

"Where have you been? Guarding the house?" He asked softly, Matt refusing to go near him, backing up with a soft whine-growl... he couldn't figure out if he wanted to warn Jeremy away or ask him to come close. "You could have stayed with us."

I slid closer too, lowering down, ears and tail down now, regret spelt out with every part of the body that could spell it. Jeremy glanced up at me, smiling, a small tense smile. "I was worried about you too. We had to hide and … I couldn't move you and them. I'm sorry. We have to get away from here though. Jamie's been beside herself here."

I nodded, glancing past him for the twins and... didn't smell them. When I didn't move, as they moved away with the kids, I moved for the house.

"They're not there." Jeremy said softly, coming back. "They got them before I could... the only reason we got out was because Matt led the big kids away. Come back, Anne, away from this house. Now. The kids need to get into a safe place. Matt needs to get into a safe place and to be checked."

I turned around, hesitating, glancing back. Grief flooded me, grief that was only put aside by the need to protect Matt, who was still pressed close against me, limping, trembling. He only trusted me right now. I followed Jeremy and the kids, flanking them, Matt almost tripping under my big paws, his smaller reddish body in much too bad a state for my instinct's liking.

I breathed out slowly, trying to not panic about the twins, but at least this was distracting me from Nick. Sort of. Matt. I had to get him back to Stonehaven and guard the twins.

We made our way and only when we reached Stonehaven a good half hour later did we slow down and relax. I changed in the basement where I'd left my clothing and hurried up to Matt, who we'd let change in the room, only entering when I could tell he was walking around.

"You okay?" I asked, softly, as he glanced up. He'd at least pulled on some pants. Had to be a good sign if he could dress himself.

"My feet hurt." Matt admitted, lifting one, the heels cracked, bloody and sore looking. He grinned though. He looked pretty satisfied with himself. "I chased that thing all over the place. The owls helped."

"Weren't you scared?"

He nodded, shrugged, and came over to wrap his arms around my waist. "Yeah. But I knew you wouldn't be."

I shut my eyes, hugging him close, a flood of love for this kid coming and overwhelming any hurt Nick had done. "I was scared of it too."

Clayton came in and sat down, watching us, not speaking. Only when Matt let go of me did he speak, softer, the anger gone now he knew his children were safe. "They told me you protected them."

"Yeah." He sat down beside him, looking a bit sheepish and embarrassed. "Jeremy couldn't do it. I heard you tell Anne that. And she was sick again so... I couldn't get the babies. I'm sorry." He glanced up at me, the guilt there, and I sat on his other side. "I just wanted to protect Kate and Logan because they can't do it yet. And I knew they were coming for them."

"It's okay. We'll hunt them down." I promised him, shutting my eyes, aware that again I'd lost the twins. I didn't know where they were now. Demetruis looked dead or close to it. "Whoever has them is in a lot of trouble."

"Damn right they are. Anne got better as soon as she knew you were in trouble. They put a spell on her." Clayton's eyes met mine. No anger now. Not at me, anyway, not after I'd snapped back into action when they'd removed it. He smiled a small tense smile. "Elena and Jeremy are already on the phone to Lucas about it."

"Can I learn to fight now?"

"Yes." Both Clayton and myself said it at the same time. We met each other's eyes again, Clayton nodding a fraction, his hand clasping Matt's shoulder.

"After spending two days defending the house from something that scared even Reece, you're getting training. A lot of it I'm not going to be easy on you though. It will hurt." Clayton's eyes locked into Matt's eyes, a small challenge right there, no trace of warm or affection.

"Okay." Matt didn't flinch. As tired as he was, as scared as he'd been for the past two days, as injured as he was, he met the older man's eyes with that same unwavering stare, this kind of connection there. Both had been bitten as children and both had been stubborn enough to survive it. I knew it'd been harder for Clayton- he'd been on his own, from what I gathered- where as Matt had us from the very start. But they still had that bond to their 'inner wolf' I doubted I'd ever have.

"This okay with you?" Clayton's eyes went to mine. "He won't be treated gently."

"He showed he can decide about that." I smiled, pushing back the urge to shove him behind me, to protect him. To say NO. I didn't like the idea of Matt getting beaten up by Clayton the way I did, when he was forcing me to learn, but... the more Matt knew, the better. "If Matt wants to do it, I'll say okay. But give him a few days to heal."

"Agreed." Clayton nodded, shaking Matt's hand, the small tense smile back now as he ruffled Matt's red hair. "I'm going to talk to your aunt now. Go on down and let Jeremy check you."

Matt left without an argument and we sat there, quiet, staring at the wall.

"I'm sorry I lost my temper." He said it, stiff, as if he'd been ordered. Probably had been. Elena hadn't liked what he'd done. But when ours met, I saw he was genuine about the words, even if he wouldn't have said them. "You okay?"

"I think I told you once to hit me if I got like that." I muttered. "Let's just focus on the twins."

"Yeah, you did." He relaxed, leaning back on his elbows, gazing at the ceiling. "Let Elena and Jeremy focus on it for a bit. Did you use any pain killers?"

"No." I breathed out, flopping back as well, suddenly aware how much of a small victory that was. Addiction to a drug, particularly that drug, was not a small thing. Usually when a trauma happened it was the time people fell back into it. I hadn't. "I didn't use anything."

"Good." Clayton didn't speak for a long time. We lay there, staring at the ceiling, my tension starting to creep into his body as if he was picking it up. "Demetruis is dead."

"About fucking time." I muttered. What a strange anti-climatic end for him after all this. "How?"

"Not sure. No one saw it happen. Jeremy saw him outside, lying there, covered in those damn birds." Clayton asked, voice going softer, "You want to go check on Nick?"

"Check? He made it pretty clear."

"Yeah. But if he really cheated on you, he'd go for a woman he could ditch. Daniella's pack. He can't ditch her. Something's going on in that idiot's head." Clayton said the words softly, but clearly, as if he'd been thinking on this for a while and had carefully planned the words in his head. "Antonio called on our way back. Lillian died the day they got there."

I sat up, sudden, horror flooding through me at Clayton's words. He sat up slowly, blue eyes fixing in mine, waiting for an argument. I couldn't think of one.

"Has Nick..."

"I haven't talked to him. No one has, aside from you and Reece, even Antonio's struggling to get contact." He handed me a phone from his pocket. "Call Antonio, not Nick."

I did. It got through instantly.

"Clayton?" It was Antonio all right. Tired. I'd never heard him like this.

"It's me." I said, spoke so quietly, that I had to repeat the words.

"I've been trying to call you. It keeps going through to voice mail. Lily... she..." For a long time, Antonio couldn't speak. "It was too much. The heart. She got an infection and ...it was too much for her. We married when I got back, when the doctor told her it was bad and then she fell asleep and she didn't wake. The funeral's tomorrow."

I shut my eyes as the words sunk in. Lillian had died. I knew she wasn't young, even if she looked it, but ...she'd always been so strong, so feisty, and she and Antonio had been so fast to pick up again. They'd even re-married.

"Is Nick..."

"He's not speaking to anyone. I heard what he'd told you. Reece isn't quiet. I don't know if it's true or not, just ...please come. I could do with you there." He spoke so softly, so quiet, that I wanted to hug the phone just to somehow do it to him.

"We can come today." Clayton spoke from beside me. "Right away."

"We're coming now. Today. I hope there's room in your big house." I added the last part, trying to joke, but it was lost in the grief for him. "I ...we're coming."

"Okay. Look, I need to go, I need to … clean. It's here. Her funeral's here." He hung up and I stared at the phone.

"I didn't know."

"Course not. Nick didn't tell you and you had another breakdown. Get packed for you and Matt. We're on the next flight and we need to hurry. It's safer for the twins at Antonio's house at the moment anyway, with that thing." Clayton stood up, hesitated, and reached down to hug me. It was awkward at first, then he relaxed, and breathed out slowly. "Guess you're the closest thing I got to a sister. Heard they weren't perfect but you'll do though. Get ready. I'll get us food for the trip."

He left before he could see my reaction. I started to pack Matt's clothing, numb, tears already leaking out. Not just at Lillian's death but at the compliment from Clayton after I'd almost gotten his twins kidnapped. Well, okay, there'd been a small dig at me in the middle of it. He wouldn't get over it till he was sure they were safe. But he'd calmed down and I wasn't banished. Not yet, anyway.

Matt came back up and when I had the right clothing, and told him to leave them in there, I let him pack whatever toys or movies he wanted. He always hated to leave Stonehaven or Forestwatch- as good as he was in the world, he preferred this world- and maybe a small den of toys would help.

I froze as I went into our bedroom. Nick's scent, the twin's scent, all fading. My babies had been taken again and I didn't know who'd taken them. I stood there a long time, eyes going from the empty crib to the bed, frozen. I couldn't go in.

Elena came up behind me, hand on my shoulder, staring into the room. "We're looking into it."

I nodded, shutting my eyes, still stuck on the threshold. "I can't go in there."

"Okay." She moved into the room, pulling the suitcase from under the bed, and packed for me. I kept my eyes shut. I didn't know what to do. Take things for the twins? Leave them? Take bottles? Nappies? Their favourite toys? Elena was packing black clothes.

Oh god. Funerals.

"How are you looking into finding them?"

"Clayton's checking scents. It looks like there was a car. There's cameras all over the place, security cameras, all sorts. We'll check. Paige and Lucas are checking. Cortez is checking. There's already people on it." Elena spoke softly but quickly, as she threw things in for me, and handed me a suitcase. "Did you need anything else? Is everything in your handbag?" She held it up, the old thing I'd had for years, and I nodded. Everything probably was in there, including things from months ago. Really had to clean it out sometime.

"We're going now." Elena led the way downstairs, the suitcase in my hands, her own bag already in the back of the car. She might not have even taken it out from the trip earlier, I didn't know, except that Jeremy and Clayton were in the other car with the kids. She and Clayton locked up while I waited in the car, Reece sliding into the back seat beside me, and I told him what Clayton had said.

He breathed out, slowly, regret all over his face. "Shit. I didn't even... you think that's it? He said it because his mother died?"

"I don't know." I didn't. Maybe he had slept with Daniella. If he did, I couldn't do a thing about it now, all I knew was that Nick was mine. If he was suffering, if he was hurting, I was right there. It didn't matter if he slept with one woman or hundreds. He couldn't leave me. I wasn't a house. I was his partner, right beside him, and always would be. It'd be easier to get rid of a shadow than your mate. "We have to be there for him. No matter what he's done. Even if he did cheat. Okay?"

"Yeah." He wasn't as sure as I was. Maybe he was less forgiving of this cheating thing. Reece had already been pretty badly stung by Daniella, after all. Reece glanced at me, his jaw tense now, adding, "You can be like that. I can't. If he did … I'm not going to let it go easily."

"He did already." The words slipped out. Soft. I shut my eyes as I heard him breathe in sharply.

"What, when?"

"He said it wasn't in his control. Over a year ago, after he hit his head, there was a woman... I don't know." I wasn't sure why I was telling Reece when he made it clear how he felt. Maybe I did need to hear it, maybe I did need to hear the anger, hear that ...my own anger had been justified. It didn't change that I was going to be there for him. But it did feel good when Reece swore softly.

"Whatever you decide with him, I'm on your side, okay? Fuck him off and I'll help. Forgive him and... I guess I'll put up with it." He said, finally, when I didn't elaborate. I nodded and returned my attention to Elena as she came to sit in the front seat. Matt was in the car behind us, I made sure, in the back seat with Kate and Logan.

We drove to the airport in silence.

In two days, somehow, the world had gone from being normal to 'disease paranoid'. We couldn't even enter the airport without putting on face masks, apparently, and were told to leave them on till we left the airport on the other end. Told to wear masks out in public at all times. Wash hands. Apparently each state was now 'cut off'. The 'canine fever' had spread so fast and so far that each state was literally in quarantine.

We all got on the plane quietly, masks on, with only the kids talking, and even they were so mentally and physically exhausted from the last few days that they were falling asleep as soon as they were on the plane. Matt got the window seat beside me, Reece on my other side, Clayton, Elena and Jeremy flanking the twins. Paige and Lucas were just up from us, I realised, though I'd been so dazed that I hadn't notice them get on.

"Anne, will we be back in time for school?" Matt asked. I seriously doubted he was asking because he wanted to go to school.

When I shook my head, muttering "Probably not," my suspicions were confirmed. He grinned such a brilliant grin that I could only smile back at his enthusiasm. I'd have to call the school and let them know we were going to miss a few days.

The flight to New York was much faster than driving, like usual, even if it was much more expensive. Truthfully I was glad it was faster. But even as we got off, I felt my heart jump into my throat, staring at the familiar airport. Memories of this place, nearly always involving Nick,flooded into my head and I felt my resolve to be strong for him even after his bombshell struggling to stay there.

Hired cars, great things, and we were driving for Antonio's big house. Mansion. Whatever it was called. It was a good hour's drive once we got through traffic but he seemed to be fast to notice we were at the security gates- they opened as Elena slowed the car down, and she drove through slowly, the mansion in daylight as impressive as it had been at night when I'd last been here. Okay. It wasn't a castle. But it was big enough for me to call it a 'mansion'. The grounds weren't small either, they were extensive, I didn't see the edges of them. I didn't see neighbours either, except for a distant roof here and there over the trees, and the glint of the river that surrounded New York moving past us.

Antonio was waiting outside as we pulled up, throwing our masks off as fast as we could, arms open, quite happy to take whoever got out first. It was Jeremy who won the race, the two of them embracing, and he and Antonio went in ahead of us. But he did pause, came back outside, and wrapped his arms around me, leaning against me a moment.

"Thankyou." Antonio murmured against my neck, his face pale, eyes red. "For coming."

"Always." I dropped the suitcase and hugged him, wrapping arms around his neck, the two of us standing there as he breathed a little deeper and heavier than usual, the suppressed emotion just barely contained. "I'm cooking tonight."

"You better be." Antonio stood back up, smiling weakly, brushing his eyes with his sleeve in an attempt to hide the dampness. "I can't cook. Nick is at work."

"Seriously?" I hadn't wanted to ask but I wasn't sure I could believe that. Nick wasn't exactly a workaholic, though he had focused on it while she was sick, but working now? Was this how he coped?

"Can't stop him. Okay. Everyone follow me. Kids share a bedroom, Clayton and Elena get one, everyone else gets their own. Daniella is at work as well."

He led us to the bedrooms, one by one, and we got dropped off there with our bags. Mine wasn't the room Nick slept in. I could smell it- it was dusty, stuffy, not used for a very long time. Maybe Nick didn't even sleep in the main house, he had said once that he disliked it. I opened the windows and, in an attempt to stay calm, started to clean up the room, dusting, stripping sheets off, finding myself doing this for every other bedroom without thinking. Antonio tried to stop me for a few minutes but ...this was how I coped. I cooked. I cleaned.

I got stampeded by three excited toddlers, apparently, as I stepped into the living room and was spotted.

I collapsed on the ground, in a heap of sheets, toddlers and tears, clinging to them as much as they clung to me, all four of us bawling our eyes out. It probably looked crazy, it probably was, but they were hysterical and I was hysterical and we were all so relieved to see each other that no one could say or do anything else.

They followed me into the laundry and helped me, which truthfully slowed us down more than it helped, but I hadn't realised how much I'd missed the triplets. Matt, the twins gone, Nick, and the need for my older babies suddenly had to go under the surface for a while. Dominic seemed better, happier, Lily and Susie trying their best to load things in the machine, agreeing with me that this was a thing they could only do if I was around with them. Then they wanted to wash their doll's clothing and I got them a tub of warm water.

We sat outside in the autumn sun, as the toddlers 'washed' and hung their things up, the sheets hung up when they were done. I shut my eyes, the warmth of the sun against skin, aware that I was only really delaying the talk with Nick. I had to go talk to him. I had to tell him that I loved him and that nothing he could say or do was pushing me away. Instead I sat there, afraid, snuggled and loved by my babies.

"You want me to get these three moving along?" Reece came out after a while, as if he'd seen me shift restlessly. "If you're going to slap Nick, better do it before he vanishes into a club."

He was right. I just was dreading it suddenly. I didn't know why. I shut my eyes, wishing this was easy, wishing that … I didn't know.

"Come on, you three, it's ice cream time. Jeremy has it. Waiting." Reece pointed at the door and the three toddlers vanished in seconds. "Let's move."

He yanked me up and I could only follow him into the garage.

"What if Nick rejects me? To my face?"

"Then slap him. And come down to me. I'll wait. What if he doesn't?" His eyes met mine, as he opened the passenger door for me, waiting for me to slide in.

"What if he does?"

"Told you. Slap him." He slammed the door a little too hard and slid into the other side. "Antonio's given you his permission."

I didn't argue, just sat there, staring at my reflection in the glass as we made our way back into the busy city. Everyone was wearing a mask. It was incredible, this fear, this paranoia, and I wondered if it was real or fake fear- if this was a real threat for humans. I sort of hoped not.

Reece gave me a mask and I slipped it on, the horrible thing suffocating to me, but he was wearing one now. The whole city was wearing one.

The building Nick worked in was huge. We stopped in the lobby as I told the woman who I was. She called up, glancing at me, and spoke softly into the phone as I paced up and down.

"Sorry. Mr. Sorrentino has asked that you come back another time."

"We're not going." Reece snapped. His tone, the way he snapped at the woman, I hadn't noticed how tense he was. Now I noticed. He crossed his arms, stared down at her, one hell of a threatening sight. The 'charming Australian' was gone. Now he was just scary Australian who looked like he was about to play knifey spoony with some poor sixty year old woman. A woman who didn't know that he was a giant pussy cat and who wasn't going to harm her.

"Sir, we're going to have to call security if you don't go." She was already reaching for the button, I was sure of it, as Reece took a step closer.

"It's okay." I touched his arm, he flinched, and shook his head.

"No. Tell Nick that his wife's here. We're not going. His wife wants to see him. She's got the right to do it. Do you get that?" He was taking out his anger at Nick on this woman, I realised with a shock, and I yanked him back as she pressed something. A little alarm went off somewhere in the distance.

"Reece, calm down."

Security guards appeared from the depths of the building, big ones, and Reece looked about ready to take out his anger at Nick on them now. With his body back to 'werewolf' normality I didn't want to face this. I dragged him outside, he swore, turning to face me.

"Calm down. We'll find another way."

"Yeah, how?"

He was not impressed, he pulled out his phone and tried to get Nick while I tried to think. What would someone in a movie do?

The answer struck me as I stared up, grinned, and tugged on his arm. "How hard do you think it'll be to find out which floor is which floor?"

"Why?" He wasn't getting an answer. Nick wasn't picking up. Reece's eyes followed my eyes to the object I was staring at that was half hidden in the alley. "You're kidding, right? Wolves up high?"

"Not kidding at all." I strode up to the window washing lift thing. Whatever it was called. "Let's go. Call Antonio and find out what floor he's on."

Reece swore and followed me. He hesitated as he stared at it, this flimsy metal object, and that fear came back into his face as it shook gently under my weight. We were an inch from the ground and he was already scared.

"What floor is Nick on?" I asked, as Reece stood there, hands on the bar, still not getting in. He asked Antonio, I got an answer, and before Reece could blink, was already making it go up. Leaving him down there.

If he was already afraid, I reasoned, what was he going to be like in this horrible thing sixteen floors up? I tried to not look at my feet, at the gaps there, or feel the metal 'shelf' shake and tremble. Tried to not see the height as I counted the floors. This was harder than expected- not all windows were open and most were tinted- but it was at least … distracting.

The wind whipped around me so hard that my hair tie vanished into it, the mask with it, and I heard Reece shouting at me. Really shouting, especially as it started to swing, but I had a purpose and Nick's reaction was more frightening to me than this thing. Even if it was swinging.

Fuck, it was really swinging.

I held on, teeth gritted, forcing the fear down as the sun vanished and the rain started again. Maybe this was why the workers weren't using it- the weather was too nasty. There were some harness things. I stared at them, too afraid to let go of the rail, wondering if I should have put one on. Probably.

What floor was I up to? Fuck. Six, seven, eight... I made it go up, and up, and up, teeth grinding, hands white around the now wet rail, the wind whipping my hair around my head so hard that I felt like I was going to go bald. The metal was slippery, the wind scary, and ...then I saw the floor I needed. Sixteenth floor.

And no windows that opened, apparently. This was not like the Matrix. Apparently this building had air conditioning.

I saw a shadow inside. I wasn't sure who it was, exactly, but if this was the floor...

The entire shelf thing shook, as the wind caught it again, and I felt it actually leave the side of the building, swinging, slamming into glass. I had no idea how to stop it from doing this. There was probably a button or a ...it was a miracle I'd figured out how to make it go up and down, seriously, a 'stabilise' button not handy or obvious.

Again, the wind caught it, and it swung wider out now, bile rising into my throat as we swung a good two metres out. Oh fuck. Okay. Bad idea. Next one.

The shelf slammed into the glass, one end shattering glass, I heard screams. Now I was noticed, or at least, it was noticed. It was a big hole though. Nice big hole. As the shelf really started to swing, swing so fast and far that I was almost tipped over the edge, I stared at the hole, focused on it, rising up on the edge of the rail. Forget that I was sixteen floors up. Fuck. Fuck...

I jumped. Jumped, nearly lost it, nearly missed it, but arms grabbed me and pulled me the rest of the way in, a heart thudding hard against my head as we crashed into the glass, the scaffolding swinging in crazy spins outside, slamming against glass. Ah fuck. Antonio was going to kill me.

We lay there, breathing hard, my eyes squeezed shut. I was waiting to crash onto ground. Wind and rain blew hard into the gap, the rumble of thunder in the distance, but ...no falling. We weren't falling. I was perfectly still.

"I'm fucking divorcing you, Australian." Nick growled against my ear, his entire body shaking, but his arms tightened. Someone was trying to ease them off me. Security, I saw from one peek, but he ignored them. "You hear me?"

"Yeah, I h-" I was cut off as the scaffold slammed into the side of the building again, hard, Nick's arms so tight now that I could barely breathe. "I got your message."

He and I stood up, nearly struck by the stupid thing, and I realised his legs were almost dangling out of the huge hole. Glass was everywhere. Nick dragged me back, back into the building, pushing security away when they offered to take me away.

"You trying to die?" Nick turned on me when we reached an office, his office from the smell of it, slamming the door hard behind us. He was white with rage and fear, body shaking, so angry. "Fuck. Fuck. You're selfish. Why would you do that to me? Today?"

"You said you're leaving me! You wouldn't let me come up!" I found a desk and sat there, legs giving way, the fear catching up. Holy crap. That cou- another loud slam, the sound of sirens, Nick grabbing at me as the floor shuddered. I cringed, shaking now, and his anger faded somewhat as he stared at me. I couldn't look at him.

"I'm not. Or I wasn't. Fuck, I don't know. You're young, Liz. Reece is young. Marry him." He jumped as the door was banged on by the security. Something about evacuating the floor. Nick ignored them. He flopped into a sofa, head in his hands, his spine shuddering. "Lillian died. I'm old. Go marry him."

Anger flooded me then, so much more of it, that it overwhelmed my fear and shock. He didn't even notice as I strode across the floor but he did notice when I yanked his head up and slapped him hard.

"Are you crazy?" I snapped. I shoved Nick backwards, sliding into his lap, sliding up hard against his chest. I made his arms go around me. "Does it look like I want a younger husband? Would I leave Reece on the safe ground and jump across a thirteen story gap for you if I wanted a young husband?"

"Sixteen." He didn't respond any more than that though. Nick's arms tightened around me, nose against my neck, his face burying against the soft skin there.

"Fine, sixteenth floor. I want you. You can leave me, divorce me, sleep with the whole damn world, and I'll still be waiting for you. And-" I pushed him back, making him meet my face, holding his head there. "-You're not old."

"My mom died, Liz. She's the same age as my dad. I couldn't ..." Nick's eyes squeezed shut, grief flooding through them, but when I kissed him, he kissed back hard, bruising my lips, his arms dropping to pull my legs up around his. Slide my skirt up, up high around my hips, lifting me up.

I didn't resist. He shoved me back onto the small sofa, barely freeing himself, ignoring the shudders of the building as the scaffold hit it, arms wrapping around me as Nick pushed himself inside me hard, groaning softly against my neck. I kissed his throat gently, pushed my hips against his, encouraging him. Having sex right now, while I practically destroyed his building? Stupid. So fucking stupid and ...we needed it.

It was just minutes before we were groaning, release flooding my body from both him and my own hormones, Nick's arms wrapping around my back and pulling me against him as he lay on top of me.

For a long time we lay like that, his bare hips and body pressed against mine, and Nick only got up when I told him I heard fire fighters coming.

"I love you." I muttered, heart jumping into throat when he hesitated...

"You sure you want me?" Nick's eyes went past me to his reflection in a small mirror. He touched a spot on his head, a spot that was slightly grey, a wrinkle on his forehead. It was like he'd never seen his face before, the fear there, the genuine 'I'm getting old and I don't know when it started' fear.

"It's you or no one."

"And he's Australian." He added, muttering, eyes meeting mine. When I raised my hand, Nick grabbed it, kissing the palm, a long deep sigh. "You sure?"

I grabbed him, tugging him down, kissing him hard against the door. "It's either you or no one. I told you that. I'm yours. And when you are old, which is a long way away, I'm still yours. Where's that ego I like?"

"It's rescuing you from falling to your death." He replied, leaning against me, his breathing fast. We stood there a long time, listening to the fire fighters rescue the building, Nick's breathing fast.

When they were gone, only then did he gently unwound my arms, and lead me downstairs.

We paused in the lift, as it went down, Nick's warm eyes fixed in mine. There was a reluctant smile, like he wasn't quite sure how to do it, but the grief was still there.

"I didn't sleep with her. Well, I did-" He hesitated, eyes meeting mine still, "-but we were dressed and ...we didn't do anything. We just slept in the same bed. Lillian had ...and Daniella found me drunk … so she stayed overnight. She was afraid I'd choke on my own vomit."

I breathed out, slowly, relief flooding through me.

"I love you. Liz. Just ...I don't know how to cope with it. I thought it was better . You and Reece care about each other and ..."

"Could you swap mates?" I snapped.

Nick hesitated, reached across, drawing me under his arm. He sighed, a long deep sigh, releasing whatever other arguments he probably had saved for the 'Reece' husband. "No. I couldn't. All right. I was wrong."

"I'm here. I'm not leaving." I grabbed his hand, squeezing it, as Nick's face clouded over with that grief he was trying to suppress. The doors opened ...and a fist hit me square in the ribs. Reece was waiting for us, his face white, and once he'd hit me, he checked me all over. Then he hit me hard, again, so hard I was winded. Reece looked furious. "You better fucking have made up for that. I … fuck."

"We did, yeah?" I glanced up at Nick, who nodded, tugging me harder against his side.

"Yeah. Come on. We better get home." He tried to smile, grasping Reece's shoulder, pulling him along with me. "I think I need both of you tonight. To be around. Just ...come home with me. I need you two. My pack."

"We're coming." I grasped Reece's hand, he blinked, nodded, and we hurried with Nick to his car, escaping the chaos I'd left behind.