Chapter 3:

A/N: Okay I'm still alive. Barely. LOL. A lot has happened this year, and I'm getting ready for a huge across country move. No longer gunna be a Californian (is that even a word?) and soon'll be a New Yorken. The only thing that totally sucks is Big Time Rush's is performing in me city again and I'm not going to even be here to go to it. Guys I actually cried when I found out this information. Everyone just looked at me weird. Yeah I get weird looks a lot.

Anyway, I know you guys can't wait for the next chapter, so

Allonz-Y! Oh guess who's P.O.V. this is. *wink wink*

Disclaimer: Do not own Big Time Rush, or the plot this story is based off of.

New Years; a time for celebration of the ending of a new year, and the beginning of another. What a better way to start a new year than with my laptop perched comfortably on my lap as my three best friends run around our apartment in preparation of the biggest party of our young lives.

Hey we're young, this is the most exciting thing ever to happen to us.

As for me, I'm planning on enjoying a nice relaxing quiet night of just me and my website of temporal physics that I've been dying to check out since forever.

Yes, I do sort of want to go to the party, pretty girls and dancing. Well just one pretty girl actually. Ever since seeing her at the Palm Woods lobby dressed to kill, I couldn't get her out of my head. Granted I couldn't seem to get her out of my head before, but now it's worse. She's everywhere in that short skirt and halter top assemble and I feel my adolescence brain turn to mush.

Yeah I know, I was the one who broke up with her, and sent her tackling into the arms of Steve, the one boy who her now obsession is towards. And boy do I regret that. No not just because her attention is no longer solely on me, but because even if I don't like admitting it, there's still a feeling deep down within me that I'm repressing.

"So Logie, you going to the party in that?" James Diamond asked me with a condescending eyebrow.

I looked down past my laptop, and noticed my sweats and t-shirt assemble, topped off with the slippers of atoms that Camille had bought me for Christmas. They were so grossly cute that I just had to put them on and wear them….constantly. When no one was around of course.

"It's perfectly fine since I am NOT going to the party." I say my attention going back to my laptop.

James shrugged and continued his search for something around my body on the couch.

"Can I help you with anything?" I demanded as he literally pulled me up from the backside and pushed me to the side.

"I'm actually looking for my lucky comb. You haven't seen it have you?" he looked over at me and I rolled my eyes. Okay the quicker I help him look for his comb the quicker I can be in piece…alone.

"Logan! Help me!" Another voice sounded from down the hall. "I can't find my helmet!"

"Good lord." I mumbled fist to my eyes, and I feel the beginning of a migraine start behind my eyes.

"And I need help picking out a shirt!" Another voice; Kendall's; call from our shared bedroom.

Finally after about an hour of helping each of my absentminded best friends finish getting ready I all but push them through the door and sigh at the eerie silence that meets me at the now empty apartment 2J.

I sigh happily retaking me place at the couch, laptop on my lap and loose myself in the relative theory of space, time and theory.

My eyes blur as they open slowly to the insistent knocking at the door. I looked around cracking the kinks in my neck noticing that I had indeed fallen asleep on the couch against my laptop. The knocking came more quickly, more demanding as I put my laptop on the table and slowly making my way to the door.

Rubbing the back of my neck, and getting ready to complain at whoever had forgotten their key I reached the door.

And all complaints left my body in a rush as I saw Camille leaning against the doorframe, barely holding herself up.

She looked beautiful, a knee length purple dress, toped of with a pair of black calf length boots and stylish denim jacket. My gaze was more focused; however on the tear streaked absent look on her face. I've never seen Camille like this before, a glazed far away look in her deep brown eyes as she slumped forward and I caught her in my arms.

"You're wearing the slippers I gave you." She mumbled incoherently against my chest as I helped her sit on the couch.

"You've been drinking." It wasn't a question, I could tell she was, she looked and smelled drunk.

"Just a little." She mumbled and giggled a bit. "Saw Steve at the party with what's-her-face, and decided to have one of my own." She giggled again and slumped against me, suddenly very weary.

"Logan?" She mumbled into my chest, voice slurred by the fabric of my t-shirt.

"What's wrong with me?"

I started at that, making sure not to move too much with Camille in my arms. Her shoulder's start to shake as silent sobs echoed into the slightly dampness of my shirt.

It was like my brain had decided to take an abrupt vacation, and I just stared down at her. She stilled in my arms as I forced my brain to think of something to say.

But I couldn't. Because deep down, I knew I was a part of her suffering. I had broken her in a way, breaking her heart, and thus pushing her into the arms of Steve. So in a way, I'm just as responsible for this broken Camille as he is. I have; no; I NEED to fix this.

"There's nothing wrong with you Camille." I surprise myself by saying. She scoffs and leans out of my embrace, using her arm to wipe the tears trailing down her cheeks.

"Right, that's why the two guys I've ever loved broke up with me."

She stands and wobbles and her drunken unsteady legs. I try to reach out to catch her but she stumbles away from me and to the door.

"I'm sorry I bothered you Logan, you don't have to worry about your useless ex." She slurs as her hands grip the door knob.

I reach the door in two strides, releasing her hands on the door, and turning her towards me.

Don't ask me were the sudden confidence came from, because I couldn't tell you, just seeing here look so hurt and vulnerable, it awakened something in me.

Now don't get the wrong idea. I'll never take advantage of a girl like this. It's just not me. But this is Camille. The girl that's had my attention from the first moment she slapped Kendall.

Seeing her deep doe looking brown eyes, widened in drunken arousal, I swallowed deeply passed the lump that logged itself into my throat. We were both breathing heavily, my gaze shifted to her heaving chest, and it made up my mind for me.

I leaned her up against the door, as my mouth attacked hers hungrily. She smelt and tasted bitter like alcohol, but with so much Camille mixed in, it was like I was starved for her and couldn't get enough.

She rigged against me for a few moments, unsure of how to pursue this new development, and to be honest, I'm not really sure what to think of this. Kissing Camille, my drunk ex; against the wall of my apartment.

Then I swear it was like my brain erupted and started leaking out of my ears when she finally started responding back with little nibbles, and her very skilled hands made their way through my hair.

Now don't ask me who moaned the most or the loudest, because like I said, my brain was slowly turned to mush. But even if it wasn't well that's private information…. So don't ask.

There I was complete make out against the door that suddenly opens pushing Camille further into me causing the both of us to crash on the floor behind us.

"Well, well, well. What have we here?" Someone asked from the door, I didn't really know who, just whenever I found out there was going to be something to pay.

The magic between Camille and me totally evaporated at the interruption, as she shut up from my arms like lightning, looking horrified at what she was caught doing, and I felt my heart shatter a bit.

She looked to the other three members of Big Time Rush standing at the door smirks firmly planted on their faces. Yeah I'm totally not gunna live this one down. Way to go Logan! Get caught making with your intoxicated ex! WHOOP!

She glanced back at me and it must have been my eyes, or a trick of the light because I could have sworn I saw a look of longing in them. But as quickly as it came it was gone.

And so was she, pushed passed the door, and on the other side before I could even get up to stop her.

I stared at the door over my best friend's heads in pain. And that's when I realized. I still had feelings for Camille.

"Well yeah! That's obvious, even Gustavo knows that one!" Carlos stated standing over me.

"What?"

"You were thinking out loud again." Kendall explained for me holding out his hand to help me to my feet.

"So are you going to explain what exactly Camille was doing here, or do we have the privilege to use our imaginations and that brilliant display we walked in on." James asked, grin never leaving his face.

Oh I am so doomed. I really need to get some new friends.