"Please A!" I grabbed the knife away from the brunette. Why would you want to do this to yourself? Why would you want to do this to me?
"I-I don't want to be here, Beyond!" Alternate sobbed. "I don't want to be a detective, I do not want to be perfect!"
"Nobody says you have to be-"
"Yes they do! They do Beyond!"
I sat down next to my friend and wrapped my arms around him.
"Please don't try and end your life..." I said gently.
"And why should I?" A choked.
"Because I need you. I need you A."
He sniffed. "You...you..."
"Your like my brother A."
"But you already have a brother."
"He's too obsessed with being a detective to pay attention to inferior little Backup. So I have you."
"Thank you B..." A snuggled into me and cried the last of his tears on my shoulder, while I rubbed his back and stroked his hair. When A was done, I asked him a question.
"A, do you promise you will never try and hurt yourself again?"
"I...I promise."
Oh A, my dear friend. That was the biggest lie you ever told me. Why did you have to break my heart like that?
Nothing terribly significant happened for a while, until we were 16 and Green died. I didn't really care of course, I'd never known her well, but now Lost was the detective, and A was my twin's first successor. He kept freaking out and setting unachievable goals for himself.
One day I found him in the bathtub. Cutting himself.
I was just going to go to the bathroom and I guess A had forgotten to lock the door because when I opened it I saw him. Alternate was sitting in the tub, holding a sharp kitchen knife and slowly dragging it across his arm. Spurts of blood seeped from the gashes and rolled down his arm. My friend was crying softly.
"A!"
He gasped and looked up, trying to roll down the sleeve of his red sweater, but I put my arm on his should firmly.
"What the hell do you think you are doing Alternate?"
"I was just...just..." The brunette stumbled over his worlds and then burst into sobs. "It's the only way I can...I can..."
I grabbed a towel off the rack and wet it with sink water. I cleaned up A's arm, and was horrified to see scars from other times that I had no idea about.
"A." I hissed, while putting Band-Aids over the fresh slices in his arm. "How long has this cutting business been going on?"
He sniffed. "Th-Three month's maybe?
"You've been cutting yourself for three months and haven't got help, or told me or something?"
He nodded glumly.
"...is it just your arm or have you cut in other placed too..."
"...My legs..."
I rolled up the legs of his jeans and saw slashes on his calves and ankles and some Band-Aids.
"You have to stop." I order him firmly.
"But...I can't..."
"...you can't?"
A shook his head and averted his eyes from me.
"Why not?"
"I...I don't know...it just f-feels good."
I'd heard of people causing themselves physical pain to ease their mental pain. I guess this is what was going on with my poor A.
"B-beyond?"
"Yes."
"I can't stop. I've become addicted."
"Yes you can." I gritted my teeth.
"A's long as they treat us like this I will never be able to stop!" He shouted.
"..."
"...I'm nothing but a letter." A whispered
"No." I shook my head.
"Yes B. It's the same with you. Were just tools and nobody cares about how we feel. They want to turn is into freak'n robots to solve cases and be detectives and not think of anything else. They want us to hate each other. Love is a weakness."
I felt my shinigami eyes brim with tears, what A has said was so true.
"I'll never...I'll never hate you A." I wrapped my arms around him in a hug.
"...thanks..."
"I love you...More thank a brother...more than a friend..." I said I softly. Our eyes were closed and all I could hear was A's steady breathing.
"Me too B..." Alternate whispered "Me too."