Feminine Troubles 8: Negotiation
The leaders of the opposing Cybertronian factions met in an overgrown field that had once been agricultural land, but was now overgrown with sapling poplar trees half as tall as Optimus's ankle joint. She felt bad about crushing them, but Hound assured her that the plants would grow back from their spreading, interlinked root system if knocked down.
The susurration of their green and silver leaves in the light wind was a pleasant, soothing sound. The sun shone brightly out of a cloudless sky, and the nearby woods were quiet. The lack of animal and bird noises probably had a lot to do with the presence of large alien robots.
Prime nodded in reassurance to Ironhide and Jazz, who had accompanied her. The two of them hung back several dozen yards from where the leaders were meeting. Soundwave and Starscream were a similar distance behind Megatron. Since Optimus was not a fool, a squad of her troops waited nearby with the Dinobots in case of trouble.
"Hello Megatron." Optimus said, inclining her head graciously.
"Greetings, Prime." The looming gunmetal grey figure replied with a leer. "You look unexpectedly lovely this orn."
Pit. Optimus was NOT going to squirm with embarrassment. So she was a femme now. So what? Elita had been a femme for millions of cycles, and it had never yet embarrassed her. "Why thank you, Megatron. You are unexpectedly gracious this day. I would have tried to turn female earlier, if that was what it took to have a civil interaction with you."
The Decepticon leader chucked darkly. The sinister sound made the plating at the back of Optimus's neck prickle. "I would be happy to…interact with you, Prime. Your new appearance is certainly a vast aesthetic improvement from before."
The Decepticon began to circle his Autobot counterpart slowly as he spoke. Naturally, Optimus circled him right back. She was not some prey animal to his predator.
Megatron's armor gleamed in the sunlight. He seemed…shinier than usual to Optimus. Also bigger. And a lot more attractive. How had she never before noticed the way his rough, craggy armor contrasted with the finely chiseled features of his face. Perhaps it was the absence of his usual savage, hate-filled snarl that made him seem almost handsome. For once, he looked more like a noble knight than a savage dragon. Not that Optimus Prime would be swayed by appearances and a little (uncharacteristic) politeness from her rival.
It would certainly take more than a hint of gallantry from the tall, broad-shouldered mech who moved like a gigantic silver hunting cat…
…Bad Prime. Bad, BAD thoughts to have about the slaggin' leader of the Decepticons!
Jazz was starting to wonder if she had spots on her chassis or something. Soundwave had been staring at her for nearly the entire posturing/mating dance sequence that their leaders were performing. Fascinating as said leaders' behavior was, she was more than a little concerned about what the frag had Soundwave so fixated.
At least Starscream didn't seem to be paying her any mind. He was too busy smirking at his leader, who had apparently polished himself to a high gloss for this meeting. Honestly, Megatron's armor was so shiny he was in danger of blinding passing satellites. Jazz was pretty sure the would-be tyrant had never been so meticulously detailed since the war began.
Well, it was nice to know that the malevolent bastard appreciated Prime's new look, but if he thought shiny armor and a sexy purring rumble of a voice were going to sway Optimus, then Megatron had another thing coming.
Oh, Primus. She just thought of Megatron's voice as sexy…Jazz would have banged her head against something in an attempt to knock her processers back to functionality, but the only hard surface handy was Ironhide. Yeah, not a good idea.
Something…was snaking around her ankle.
She looked down in disbelief, saw the end of one of Soundwave's tentacles unwrap itself, give a gentle stroke to one of her struts, and point to something. Resisting the urge to shudder, squeal like the femme she now was, or stomp the tentacle, she looked where it indicated.
Wow. Those were some seriously smoldering looks between Starscream's trinemates and the twins. The same twins whose signature combat maneuver involved tackling fliers out of the air and mauling them. Who were now scary-hot femmes. And who were being checked out by a couple of admittedly handsome seekers who had also shown up to the gathering looking suspiciously shiny. Damn. Between them and the leaders, this war might end in mass interfacing, not mutual annihilation.
'Make love, not war' indeed. Who said organics never had good ideas?
The tentacle was back. And it was stroking the inside of her ankle joint again. Whoa. Getting a little personal there! She took a moment to gape at Soundwave in astonishment, before yanking her leg out of his grasp. He didn't try to hold her. In fact, for someone with no discernable facial expressions, he managed to convey a look of distinct disappointment surprisingly well. Maybe it was a pisonic thing?
What was the world coming to? The third in command of the Decepticons was flirting with her…badly!
And Megatron was flirting with Optimus! Really well!
And whoa…those two were going to spontaneously combust the clearing if they didn't cool down! Megatron was looming in Prime's personal space looking like he was a click away from trying to throw her over his shoulder and take off, and Optimus had a darkly smoldering gaze fixed on her counterpart. Her body language was interested, but far from submissive. If old Megs tried anything kidnap-y, he was liable to get an energon sword somewhere sensitive.
On the other hand, it looked like Optimus was seriously considering getting creative with the peace process. Well, their rallying cry was "Til All Are One", after all. This was probably not quite what any of them had originally had in mind, but it beat getting all their afts slagged until there weren't enough Cybertronians left to repopulate. Attrition would doom them all eventually if the war didn't end.
Pit, Jazz would offer to hold the Decepticon Despot Sexpot down while her boss merged sparks with him, if that's what it took. The humans used to cement political alliances with mating bonds all the time, so there was no reason Cybertronians couldn't do the same…
Great. Now Tall, Dark and Gruesome over there was looking amused. And how the slag was he conveying emotion with his entire face covered? Empathic projection? Jazz frowned at him in what she hoped was a quelling way and attempted to resume her derailed train of thought.
Political mating alliances…the humans would probably call it a "royal wedding." They used to do it all the time, before they started electing their leaders. Megatron and Optimus became the heads of their armies by respectively being the biggest badass around or by being chosen by the Matrix of Leadership. If the two of them ever officially bonded, it would be like the two schools of thought having a particularly violent rugby match. Jazz seriously considered scheming to make it happen for sheer entertainment value. And to save their species from extinction, of course.
Inter faction romance tended to end badly in human plays and operas and such, but in their actual history, marrying the two heads of state or the children of same to one another was a traditional way to cement a peace agreement. Plus, since pretty much all the mechs were Decepticons, and all the femmes were Autobots, all inter-gender relations were also inter-faction.
Weird, but potentially very useful. If strength of arms couldn't create peace, then Unresolved Sexual Tension might just as well do the trick. Or even Resolved Sexual Tension. In fact, resolving Megatron's sexual tension might be a better weapon for Optimus than a thousand guns. Not only did she have some serious femme fatale potential (though Jazz suspected she might need a little coaching) but if they ever spark shared or merged, Optimus would have a real advantage.
Let's face it, Megatron might have a bit of an edge now in physical combat, but Optimus was the Prime. Her spark was attached to the living matrix, which had chosen her out of all of Cybertron to lead them. There was no way that arrogant, violent, often foolish Megatron had a spark that approached that kind of radiant strength. The Decepticon would be eating out of Prime's servo before he knew it. Not to mention that Jazz had interfaced with Optimus before, and the things that mech, er, femme, could do with her mouth and her energy fields were astonishing…
Spark merging had once been common, but had long been out of favor due to the emotional vulnerability and distraction it could cause. In rare instances it could even kill a mech or femme if their partner died. The shock could snuff their spark outright, or the widowed partner might gradually fade away. It was less common in those with strong emotional ties outside the bond, but still possible. The practice had become extremely rare after the end of the Golden Age.
The Autobots still shared their sparks when in serious relationships, but rumor had it that the Decepticons stuck with strictly physical unions. Sometimes they didn't even use their interfacing equipment, just their energy fields. The generally backstabbing nature of their command structure did not engender a lot of trust between mechs.
Spark sharing and spark merging were a whole other level of commitment. In spark sharing, both parties could feel each other's emotions, and sometimes had temporary carry-over of personality traits. Merging was far more permanent, and let the participants actually see each other's thoughts and memories. They would always have a certain background awareness of each other, and be affected by one another's physical and emotional states.
That was the only reason she had never actually bonded with Prowl. It was hard to resist bonding during spark sharing with someone you really love, but they had always done so because they could not afford to have the second and third in command of this mission compromised to that degree. If they had not been so high in the chain of command, they might have taken the risk, but as it was, it would be too dangerous to the cause.
Aaaaand Soundwave was twining an appendage around her ankle joint again. Shooting him was out, unfortunately. No sense in disturbing the uneasy truce. Ironhide was being oblivious, watching their Prime and her arch nemesis circle each other like horny mountain lions in the spring.
Starscream was vastly entertained by how utterly clueless Megatron was at courting. Had the mech never seen a femme before? The flier was seriously wondering if his oh, so glorious leader had ever dated in his life. Mech or femme. Surely he had had some sort of relationship other than having his aft kissed by subordinates or fragging his officers in twisted dominance games at some point?
Well, perhaps not. It wasn't like there had been a lot of casual dating going on in the Gladiator pits. It was disgraceful. Starscream wondered if Megatron even knew where to find a femme's g-sensors.
He supposed he could do an intervention if necessary. Skyfire wouldn't mind, if it was for Optimus's benefit. In fact, she would probably offer to help. Perhaps they should start conducting seminars on how to please a femme. Demonstrations would probably be necessary. Of course, given the general mental level of most Decepticons, it might require hand puppets.
Well, just so long as Megatron and Optimus worked something out before Sky started carrying. There was no way it wouldn't happen sooner or later, between the attention Starscream was paying her, and her general level of contentment among the convivial Autobot science team. Skyfire's stress levels had never been so low amid the cutthroat politics of the Science Academy. Plus she had been a mech then, of course.
He had asked the shuttle if she was taking precautions, but she had gently explained that Cybertronians were too few, now. She would not attempt to prevent conception. Which of course meant that his duty as her mate was to try to get Prime and Megatron to make nice. The middle of a war was no place to lay eggs
Starscream caught the Cannon-toting Autobot Amazon's optics and let his smirk grow wider. Instead of the other transformer getting angry like he expected, she gave his form a slow, thorough once-over that mad him a bit anxious. Well, he supposed even Ironhide could appreciate a handsome seeker, but eek.
Now, if the two pathetically repressed leaders could work out their issues, maybe he would have time to meet up with Skyfire later. His femme had mentioned something about a surprise for him…
Ironhide was mentally picturing what Prime and Megatron's sparklings would look like when the Con air commander smirked at her. She deliberately looked the flier up and down, then returned the smirk with interest. Starscream looked gratifyingly freaked out.
The weapons specialist mentally shook herself. She mustn't let entertaining herself become a distraction from bodyguarding her leader. Just because Bucket Head obviously wanted to get under Optimus's plating, didn't make the fragger any less of a threat.
Now, Ironhide had always had a healthy interface drive, but she was starting to think all those years of her Prime repressing himself was causing the femme version to enter a breeding cycle. Really, the stress of the war should have prevented that, but there hadn't been any major battles in a while, and the main source of aggression towards her person and her charges was clearly presenting himself as a mating prospect.
In fact, of the two leaders, the stressed out one was definitely Megatron. He looked kind of twitchy, actually. Ironhide suspected that his megalomania and his instincts were conflicting. He wanted to conquer and rule, and loved to fight, but his instinctive programming was responding to not only an attractive femme who was also a mech he had been obsessed with for millennia, but to his Prime. No matter how far the Decepticon leader buried it, he was still a Cybertonian, and there would always be something within him that responded to the presence of the Matrix of Leadership.
Optimus, by contrast, was just a lot more distracted by the Shiny than was standard. Ironhide was one of the oldest Autobots on Earth right now, and remembered the last femme prime, a long, long time ago. It had been back in the days when Transformers procreated more often with carried sparks, and one of the responsibilities of the Prime was a fertility festival, every orbital solar cycle. It had served religious purposes, but also regulated the populaces' breeding cycles.
When Cybertonians gave up sexual reproduction, and the Decepticon uprisings had begun, the ceremony had been abandoned. Sentinal had never officiated it and Optimus probably hadn't known to look for it in her matrix. Unfortunately, that meant that their entire species currently had long frustrated procreation protocols and unregulated breeding cycles. Plus, there were no sparklings around whose presence would help to suppress the Heat. The procreation protocols prioritized care of young sparklings over the creation of more, so a femme could actually use baby-sitting as a form of cycle suppression. It was apparently similar to humans, who did not usually ovulate while nursing their young.
Ironhide made a mental note to have a talk with her leader about the intersections of femme programming with Prime programming later. A prime entering breeding cycle could potentially tip a lot of other bots over into one, too. Optimus was already showing some symptoms. She was an of-age femme who had never (as far as her new body was concerned) mated or raised offspring. There were no younglings nearby to satisfy a Prime's creation protocols. There was an available male making courting overtures.
Optimus's Prime base programming was to defend and preserve Cybertron, its people and its culture. Right now, the biggest danger to all those things was depopulation. Her subconscious, joined with the Matrix of Leadership was likely to take matters into its own metaphoric hands and send her into what the humans might call heat. If that happened, well she was Prime, and all the bots near her would be affected. It wasn't out of the realm of possibility that every femme and mech within range could find themselves with an activated, urgent breeding drive at the same time.
Ironhide didn't think Optimus was aware of it. Add to that the fact that "within range" would probably mean the entire Sol system, and those sparklings she had been idly imagining earlier might be not so imaginary in the very near future. Hopefully they'd take after their mothers. The weapons specialist decided she would explain the facts of life to her leader later, and start deciding which Decepticon warrior or warriors she wanted as code-and-spark donors for her children right now. Ideally, she would prefer a large flier or two who would then keep well out of the way…
In the meantime, Ironhide would do her job, protect her Prime, and enjoy the show.