Witch was feeling like the top of the world. No one had caught her in her scheme. She would lurk in the shadows of town, watching the people going crazy for mops. The current victim was Lanna; but as much fun as it was to see the snobby singer go crazy and tote around Potato the Mop, Witch had actually had an especially fun time watching Julia, because she'd been so darn serious. But now she seemed to have relaxed a bit. She wasn't crazy, but she wasn't crazy serious, either. She was having more fun, and this pleased the witch.
Of course, when did Witch start bothering herself with human emotions?
"Hey, Witch."
She turned. The adorable new boy, Mark, stood behind her, smiling with his hands in his pockets.
Oh, right.
That was when she started bothering herself with human emotions.
"Heya, Squirt," she said, swinging her legs down from the tree she was in and landing next to him. "How does the day go?"
"Pretty well." He eyed her. "You wouldn't, uh, happen to have anything to do with the Crazy Epidemic going around, would you?"
Before she could answer, there was a shower of blue-green glitter, and the Harvest Goddess materialized between them. "Of course she would," the goddess said haughtily, folding her porcelain-like arms and glaring at Witch. "She always does."
Witch smiled mischievously and rolled her ruby eyes. "Just having fun, Ms. Goody Two-Shoes," she said lazily, picking a leaf off of her dress. "Forever is an awfully long time to busy yourself swimming. By the way, you're looking a little pruny."
Harvest Goddess's face turned the color of the strawberries she so loved to, in Witch's eloquent wording, "make herself fat off of". "Why, you-" she said, then calmed and smirked. "Well, at least I don't have the face of a frog," she said smugly.
Now it was Witch's turn to flush. "Shut up, freak."
"Ooh, ouch! Did that hurt?"
"I'll show you the meaning of hurt!"
"I daresay you won't!"
"Daresay? What are you, a granny? I'll answer that- yeah, you are."
"You're the one that looks like a granny!"
"You're just jealous!"
"Nuh-uh!"
"Yuh-huh!"
"Nuh-uh!"
"Yuh-huh!"
"Did someone say frogs?" chirped Witchkin, who had appeared unnoticed during the fight.
"Nuh-uh!"
"Yuh-huh!"
Mark was looking a little pale. He appeared to be at a loss for words.
Witch stomped over to him and latched onto his wrist. "Come on, Squirt, let's go somewhere there aren't so many pests," she snarled.
"Oh, no you don't! For Mark's safety, I demand you let him go!" Harvest Goddess grabbed his other wrist.
"Oh, yeah? Well, I wouldn't consider him safe with you! You'd probably make him into one of your little dwarfs and work him to death like all the others!"
"For your information, missy, they're called Harvest Sprites!"
"Harvest Sprite, dwarf, what's the difference? I've heard them called goblins, vermin, and dish rag."
"I've heard the same names for you! And anyway, I'm not the one who would do that. You would."
"Make him into a dwarf? What, and please you?"
"No! You'd probably make him into a teddy bear. Or a mop-loving FREAK like the rest of the people in town!" Harvest Goddess shrieked.
Witch smirked and pulled Mark closer to her. "Ohh, you just called your people freaks. That would make them sad. Besides, I wouldn't transform Mark. I like him." And, because she really did like him, and especially because she new that the Harvest Goddess did, too, Witch planted a kiss right on his lips.
"How dare you?" Harvest Goddess screamed, looked repulsed. Witch broke away to laugh jubilantly. "Wouldn't want to kiss him now, huh, Harvi?" she taunted, successfully pulling a dazedly-smiling Mark away from the goddess. "Not after I sullied him like that."
With that she pranced away, taking Mark with her.
Yep. On top of the world.

Three Years Later

"Daddy? Did Mommy really love a mop, once?"
Elliot grinned down at his daughter, Kelly, and ruffled her pale hair. "Don't be silly, Kel," he lied, not wanting to upset his wife or child. But the thought made him smile. He remembered being so scared, but now he saw how ridiculous it was.
Still, he got the chills whenever he saw a mop.
Julia entered the room, smiling and putting rolls on the table. "Now, now, stop gossiping and help me set the table for dinner, 'kay?" she said, smiling. Kelly jumped to her feet and nodded, then toddled after her mother after flashing her father a happy smile.
Elliot smiled back, and went to get the flowers. They were pansies, purple, petite, and tied with a pink bow. They'd been a gift from Vaughn, that jerk. He'd written a note saying, "For Julia, Because I Know They Are Her Favorite". He'd ripped it up and thrown it away before Julia saw it. But the pansies, well, they were pretty, and Sabrina had grown them herself. Waste not, want not.
Elliot slipped them into a vase and put them in the center of the table. Moments later, his girls re-entered as well.
Julia set down the last plate and helped Kelly into her seat. (Anyone think it's kinda funny that Julia looks sort of like a Barbie and she named her daughter Kelly? XD) It was only when she herself sat down did she notice the pansies.
Suddenly a strange look passed across her face. "Uh, would you guys excuse me for a moment?" she said politely, then grabbed the vase and headed for the door.
"Honey?" Elliot called after her, vaguely concerned.
"They just need some water!" she called back cheerfully, and there was a slam as the front door shut behind her.
Elliot and Kelly played a few games of I Spy before Kelly finally got worried and asked Daddy to go check on Mommy. Elliot consented and gave her a ribbon to play with while he was gone.
Elliot stepped onto the porch and gazed up at the stars. The wind whispered by, ripping a few petals off of the pansies and fluttering them around his face.
He lowered his eyes to where Julia sat on the porch, neatly eating the pansies and looking concerned. She jumped violently when Elliot sat down next to her.
"Uh- uh-" She shoved the empty vase away from her and swallowed quickly. "They all flew away," she said lamely.
Elliot smiled. Then laughed.
"What?" Julia looked torn between frowning and smiling.
"You ate them."
"D-d-d-did not."
"There's a petal on your chin." He removed it and laughed harder.
Julia relented and smiled, too, though looking a little worried.
"I'm not sure what's wrong with me," she confessed.
Elliot grinned back.
"There's nothing wrong with you," he waved off, and helped her to her feet. He took the last pansy from her hands ate it, and said, "See?"
Julia laughed.
As they walked inside, Elliot thought to himself, Actually, that wasn't too bad.
Love. Crazy, isn't it?