It was the fourth of July, but not just any Fourth of July, it was the bicentennial of the United States so of course this day was a much bigger deal than the past years. Moe had closed the bar for the day, no one really went to his or Patrick's bar any way. It was the Tropical Island Bar everyone chose to visit, it was nice and big for the many people who wanted to go in groups, and it was a great place for Moe and Patrick to take their rivalry further and have a drunk match.

The rules of the match were simple, find your most potent drink on the menu, and then make the rivals crony drink as many shots as he could without passing out. Patrick had won two years in a row so far thanks to Bruce and his ability to be barely drunk by the time Mick had about seven shots of Moe's specialty and could barely see straight. This year, Moe hoped to use Barney and had talked Patrick into using Ian instead of Bruce, just for a change of pace since Moe was sort of doing the same thing.

The boys were amazed at how busy it was as they made their way into the huge bar that could hold more people than Moe's or Patrick's put together. Moe ran to the back to get the seat he wanted for the competition, the boys followed him, hoping that Barney would be up to the challenge. Homer brought Jenna along for company and to also skip out with her later, they didn't want to be there long. While Roger was eager to watch his new girlfriend Karyn play with the band. He, unfortunately, did not meet her until after Valentine's Day, so of course Homer and the others had to hear about how miserable he was. Well Barney and Moe did, Homer was out with Jenna at a lovely restaurant in Miami.

Barney still had not found anyone and he was perfectly fine with that, he liked working and learned how to handle Moe's specialty drinks, so tonight he was ready for whatever Moe threw at him. At the moment though, he was eyeing the buffet table with all the delicious treats. He knew he could not drink so much on an empty stomach, so it was best to chow down. Of course he could not resist joking around with Homer when he saw the punch bowl at the end of the table.

"Hey Homer, I see they have a punch bowl, wanna go spike it?" Barney laughed.

"Of course not, I'm not that stupid to do that again." Homer replied while he scanned the buffet table wondering if they had any of those yummy cocktail weenies he liked.

"What did you do?" Jenna asked in a surprised voice. This was a story she had not heard before.

"Oh I just got a little drunk during a graduation party, it's in the past, I'd rather not talk about it," Homer replied as he rubbed his hands together hoping that the topic would go away.

"But it was so funny seeing you eye the girls bosoms," Barney replied.

"Heh, heh, bosoms," Roger giggled.

"Barney shut up!" Homer replied while Jenna tried her hardest not to laugh. If her boyfriend was embarrassed then it was probably best to leave it be.

"Well I'm gonna go over there and get myself some finger sandwiches and chips and dip, if you want to join me you may," Barney said as he walked off in a huff.

Homer blew at his bangs in frustration before turning back to Jenna who was now busy watching the local band come up and start playing. Jenna looked around for Karyn and soon found her behind the stands setting up the drums and looking very excited to play tonight. It wasn't long before Roger was up and went straight toward the stage to greet his girlfriend for the evening.

Barney returned a few moments later with a huge plate of food and immediately started to chow down while Moe, Homer and Jenna watched in amazement at how much he was eating, he apparently really wanted to get this challenge over with.

"Hey Barn, I don't want you to explode now, save that for when you beat Ian," Moe said.

"Hey it's not good to be drunk and be on an empty stomach, I need to be focused for you," Barney said.

"Well I'm proud you want to do that then," Moe replied as he continued to watch with fascination.

Homer stared at the food that was still on his friend's plate, and there was a mighty fine looking chicken wing on the edge that seemed to call out to him. Hoping Barney was not paying attention he tried to take it off his plate, but apparently Barney noticed and grabbed a nearby fork which he slammed down on Homer's palm. Homer stared at the fork that was now embedded into his hand before letting out a surprised yelp.

"Uhh I guess he doesn't want any help," Jenna replied.

"But did he have to stab me?" Homer asked as he nursed his injured palm.

Moe didn't say anything; he was too distracted now by Patrick who had just walked in with Ian and Bruce. Ian looked like he was ready to take on anything as he came into the room carrying his head high and walking in like he owned the place, Patrick must have given him an interesting pep talk. Moe only glared at them as they made their way to the table.

"Well good evening Moe, ready for another ass whippin'?" Patrick said as he sat next to Moe and put his arm around his shoulder.

"Of course not, for I have Barney the magnificent!" Moe replied as he pushed Patrick off of him and revealed Barney still enjoying his buffet dinner. Barney looked up for a second while he chowed down on some chips, salsa covering his face. "Legend has it that in senior year of high school, he once drank a whole six pack in five minutes, and didn't even get drunk," Moe replied with a sly smile hoping that it was enough for the guys to feel lower and not as superior.

"Big deal, Ian here drank a whole bottle of Jack Daniel's without stopping and was still coherent," Patrick replied, while Ian puffed up with pride.

"Oh really, musta been those little containers that barely hold anything at all, he's too puny to even drink that much," Moe said, he knew from experience how much people could drink in his bar.

"Well then I am here to prove you wrong," Patrick said as he waved at Jacob main guy in charge at the Tropical Island Bar. Jacob was waiting for them to call them over and grabbed a pen and paper to go hear what the two bar tenders wanted. This was going to be an interesting night.

"So boys, what main ingredient do you need," Jacob asked.

"I need a bottle of vodka, bailey's, bourbon, and the strongest whiskey you got," Patrick said as he stared at Moe, not taking his eye off his rival.

"Very good, and for you Moe?" Jacob asked.

"Hawaiian Punch, Amaretto, Kahlua, Jagermeister, and as much Everclear as you got!" Moe said as he did the same to Patrick, never leaving his field of vision.

Homer stared back at Barney nervously, he had seen his friend quaff down on beer, and take a few shots of Jagermeister and whiskey. But he had never seen him drink Everclear, and he wondered if his best friend could handle it, he had seen the effects of it after someone had drunk too much at the bar and it wasn't pretty. Of course Barney seemed better built than the ones he had seen, but he still wasn't sure. Hopefully Moe would not give him too much.

It wasn't long before the ingredients arrived and both Moe and Patrick went to work mixing up their concoctions into pitchers so they could poor them into the shot glasses when the game began. It was a simple game really; the two bartenders each had two of their own type of drink that they considered potent. For Moe it was the Grizzly Bear and potent drink that contained amaretto, Jagermeister, Kahlua and some milk. The other was even more potent, the dreaded Kick in the Crotch, named after Mick who drank more than he realized one evening. All it contained was Everclear and Hawaiian Punch. It would take a while for the drink to really affect him and that's why Moe chose it, hopefully Ian would be down before Barney had more than he bargained for.

As for Patrick, he had his own special concoctions; one was Road Kill, containing Bourbon, some rum and Irish whiskey. The other was Shot in the Dark, vodka, Baileys, and Kahlua. All four of them sounded potent but how long both would finish it was anyone's guess. They would take the first shot, let it move down their throat and then put the glass upside down the table as a way of letting the bartenders know they were ready for another. Both drinkers were new to this, so no one was sure what was going to happen, but some people were placing bets and most of those bets were going to Barney.

Once the two bartenders had their concoctions mixed, the battle was ready to begin. Moe poured the first shot, using the least potent one first, the Grizzly Bear which he set in front of Barney. Patrick poured the Road Kill and set it in front of Ian. They were not to drink it yet, they had to wait for the signal.

"Alright boys it's time to see who has the better drink, rules are as follows: drink all that is in the shot glass, wait until the opponent is finished with his shot before you begin the next round, giving up will result in losing the game, and finally hold onto your hats, it's time to begin. On your mark, get set…go!" Jacob called out.

Barney and Ian grabbed their shots, held them firmly in their hands and drank it down. Both took a moment to feel the effects of the drink slowly go from their tongues, through their esophagus and into the stomach; later the drinks would reach the bloodstream but not quite yet. Finally once they both felt satisfied with the drink, they set the shot glass down and waited for another.

Homer and Jenna watched intently as Barney took another shot of the Grizzly Bear while everyone around them cheered loudly for both of them to keep going. Both seemed to know what they were doing as they showed no signs of slowing down and both seemed to keep their cool about them. After the fifth shot, Barney was showing no signs of slowing down while poor Ian had to take a moment to think about it before setting his shot glass right side up. Of course he was the lucky one who was not getting Everclear, which was about to be next for Barney as they were ready to bring the most potent drink out.

Of course now the table was getting crowded, and even though Homer was Barney's best friend, he had been pushed to the back where he could barely see his friend duke it out with the rival bartender. He tried to see over the masses but it was no use and looked over at Jenna with a frustrated look.

"This place is getting crowded isn't it," Jenna said.

"Yeah I wasn't expecting it to get this crazy," Homer replied as he tried to scoot into the crowd again, Jenna grabbed him by the arm.

"I bet they won't miss you if we sneak out for a bit," Jenna said as she tried to push Homer toward the door.

"But that's my friend, he probably wants me to stay there and help," Homer said nervously.

"Oh he won't know by the end of this, besides, Roger is not even watching either, he's busy learning the guitar from Karyn," Jenna said as she pointed toward the stage where Roger was sitting next to Karyn and had just created a horrible flat note, making Homer wince.

"Alright, where do you want to go?" Homer asked.

Jenna only smiled. "Follow me."

It wasn't surprising to see hundreds of boats out on the water, fireworks were planned to be set off once it got dark enough so of course everyone was anchored out near the shore waiting for the festivities to commence. Jenna was not one of them though; she weaved in and out among the many boats that were lined up in Mick's old fishing boat that he no longer used. He had given it to her a few years ago for her to fish in and she was proud of her little boat, proud enough for her to take Homer to a special place she liked to go to on nights like this.

Homer held on, wondering where Jenna was taking him and if he would return in time to see who the victor was of the great American chug off. But after a while, the thoughts of his friends back on the island had long since been forgotten and he was enjoying the salty sea breeze as it blew into his face. Of course he had never been out this late so it was natural to still be a little cautious about the whole idea.

"Uhhh…Jenna, where are we going exactly?" he asked after he noticed that he had not seen any boats for about five minutes.

"Norman Key, it's near the place where you caught that shark during thanksgiving weekend," Jenna replied.

"Oh yeah, but why are we going out so far?" Homer asked.

"You'll find out eventually, Homer, don't worry," Jenna said as she kept her eyes on the horizon yet knowing her boyfriend was still a little nervous about being so far out.

Norman Key held a special place in both Jenna and Mick's heart. It's a small island, only about the size of one city block, and so far no one has actually tried to claim it since most of the island is underwater during high tide. It was named after an old northerner who came down from New York a few years ago due to ill health. He had hoped that the warm weather would help him and his fragile heart, and he would often stop by Moe's for a quick drink in the evening. But the quick drink usually lasted longer than planned; Mick would often get into long discussions with the man about life and love, leaving Mick wanting to know more every time he left. Jenna had even gotten a few pointers from him and loved his company. He especially loved her key lime pie too.

But like many great things, Norman's fragile heart could not be fixed, and after two years of trying to return to better health, Norman passed away. He was eighty-nine, a good age for someone like him, but Mick and Jenna knew he could have lived to be one hundred. Mick was so distraught over his death that he just sailed away for a day and found himself on the island, one that was not even listed on the map. He believed Norman brought him here to remember the old guy and after spending a whole day on it just thinking, he left the island, naming it after him and visiting as often as he could. Now that he was on tour with his music, it was Jenna's duty to carry on that tradition and usually she went every Monday morning just before work to just sit and contemplate; now it was time to bring a visitor.

When Jenna finally reached the island, she parked the boat up against the branch of a mangrove tree, and started to climb up the branches. Homer watched her go up with fascination and wondering what it was that she was doing exactly.

"Well aren't you coming up?" Jenna asked.

"Oh I just thought you were collecting fruit or nuts or something," Homer replied as he scrambled on up the branches.

"Oh I don't need to worry about that since I already got one," Jenna laughed.

Homer only grinned at her, she had such a fun sense of humor and that's what he liked most about her. As quickly as he could, he made his way up the tree until he was sitting right next to her staring out into Caribbean with the lights of Key West shining far out on the horizon while the sun began to set.

"We can watch the fireworks from here and maybe even talk about the future," Jenna said once Homer was settled in next to her.

"The future? What do you mean by that?" Homer asked. "Are you thinking about making a better version of your key lime pie?"

Jenna could not help but shove Homer lightly, just enough to make him nervous without him falling off the tree. "No silly, have you ever stopped to think about what you want to do for the rest of your life, where you want to go, who you want to share it with?"

"Truthfully…" Homer began with excitement in his voice before thinking about it and then replying in a rather dejected way. "No not really, I just think about having fun working at the bar, fishing and relaxing on the beach, what more do you want?"

"But do you really want to live like this forever? I mean as soon as I get enough money from work, I'm going to college and get my business degree. I might have to go outside of Florida for that which means you might never see me again, unless you want to come with me," Jenna said as she fluttered her eyelids.

"Well I hear Springfield has a pretty good college for that, maybe I can bring you there, you can meet my hometown, my father, all my other friends, where I grew up, the whole nine yards," Homer said.

"Well that's a thought, but what about you, don't you want to get a degree and work somewhere where you can make more money. You can't live like this forever though; you never know how much more our love will grow."

"Huh? What?" Homer asked a little surprised about where this conversation was going.

"Well maybe one day we will want to get married, maybe even have kids."

"Oh dear…I never actually...really…uh…thought about that," Homer replied nervously, he only thought about having a girlfriend, now even though they had been together for seven months she was already thinking about moving forward, it just seemed to sudden to him and he really had no idea what to say. Of course he still thought about Marge and it made him wonder if she ever thought about marriage and kids to Artie. Maybe it was better to be single, kids just didn't sound very appealing to him at the moment. Especially not after an incident back in May where a family let their kids run lose in the bar.

"Don't worry Homer, I don't want to do it right away, like I said, maybe after I am done with college, of course that's gonna be years from now. But I know people who have been together for years and are happy just being they couple they are. Maybe that's the right thing to do; you know make sure we really love each other."

"Yeah I uh…think so too."

Jenna let out a smile, she could see that she started a conversation that was too sudden for Homer and apparently wasn't ready to think about it yet. "You're cute when you are nervous, but I'll let you think about it some more, for now though I think it's time to have some fun."

Homer was so lost in thought now that he did not notice that Jenna had taken her top off and dove right into the water under the tree. He still could not believe she had suggested all that stuff and now he was nervous and unsure if he could do anything like that. He came to Key West to work, have a good time, and find a girlfriend, he had totally forgotten about the future commitment involved.

"Homer! Get down here, the water is great!" Jenna called.

Homer shook himself back to reality and looked down at Jenna; apparently she was missing a few items on her person, and knew why once he saw her tank top sitting on the branch next to him. Yeah it was better just to live for the moment right now, the future could wait, tonight was just a fun night.

"Nah I think I will stay up here and keep your tank top hostage," Homer replied with a grin as he took the tank top off the branch.

"Oh really, what's the ransom?" Jenna asked.

"Oh I don't know, maybe a nice big snuggle later," Homer grinned.

"We could have one now you know, no one is here," Jenna called.

"Oh yeah, we haven't done it this way before," Homer called back before he took off his shirt and pants and dived right in.

Moments later, under the watchful eye of several fruit bats in the trees, two young lovers were skinny dipping in the pale moonlight while the two hundred year old celebration of America went into full swing as the fireworks danced around them.

Hours later, the two lovers made their way back to the key soaking wet but with their clothes on. Jenna brought the boat toward the dock and noticed a lone figure standing nearby waiting for them. It was Roger and he looked rather worried.

"Geeze you two run off leaving Moe and Barney to fend for themselves, thank God no fights erupted," Roger said.

"Oh really, what happened?" Homer asked as he made his way out of the boat.

"Well Barney won the competition after Ian took his sixth Shot in the Dark and went down. Barney just kept drinking that Kick in the Crotch after though just to show his toughness. Let's just say he ended up barfing in the flowerbed outside before fainting," Roger.

"Oh dear is he alright?" Jenna asked.

"The doctor said he will be fine in the morning once his stomach is done being pumped," Roger replied as he rolled his eyes.

"Aww great he's in the hospital?" Homer cried out.

"Yeah and Moe would like to have a word with you for skipping out on him like that, he's not pleased but hey looks like you two had a fun time either way," Roger said as he noticed how wet both his friends were.

"We did though now I am thinking about running back there, just to avoid Moe," Homer said.

"Heh after listening to him yell at me for not watching you guys, I would make that a good suggestion," Roger said.

"I'll handle it and tell him it was my fault, I've done it before and usually he backs down to a pretty girl like me," Jenna said slyly as she started walking away with a sway in her step.

Roger and Homer watched her make her way over to Roger's car, both of them eyeing her with interest as her butt swayed back and forth thanks to her wet shorts.

"Homer, I got to admit, you are one lucky guy."

A/N: Alright I know I should have ended it a few paragraphs ago but I just wanted to let everyone know what happened to Barney in the end. I have witnessed what everclear does too and it's not a fun drink, believe me, happened exactly a year ago too, man that was a weird night, Star Wars and Star Trek stuff everywhere! So yeah this was kind of a naughty chapter with all the booze and the best kind of PG-13 rating for skinny dipping. But now we will have to move ahead into the story, the next chapter is moving ahead two more years to 1978 and its time to catch up with Artie and Marge, yup you are finally seeing those two again, so yay.

Also thank you to UndeadSamurai for my 100th review! Also to Lucy E. Curtis Simpson Griffin and The Simpsons Fan, I am going to have to disagree with you about the fact that the kids don't look like their parents. I think they do, just look at their noses, same kind of noses. And another thing, check out Girls Just Want to Have Sums, one of the newer episodes, I saw screenshots of it a while back after not seeing it for a long time and Lisa was wearing a wig to look like a boy, I thought it was Homer was first. So yeah check that out.