I am long asleep before Peeta returns from his talk with Finnick. I scolded Finnick for wanting to talk to Peeta and leave Annie for a bit. I reminded him that he should be with her. He responded by stating he needed to help Peeta because I helped get him back to Annie.
I am consumed by a nightmare. I am back in the games, and it is a cruel mash up of all three games. The faces of so many people haunt me, especially Cato in this one. He returns from the death and cuts off my leg. I am left in the arena to save myself from mutts but I am unable to move. I am torn apart by the mutts as Peeta is declared the winner of the games.
I am disoriented as I am abruptly woken up. I am on the floor of Peeta's shower, freezing cold water pouring from the shower head. Peeta is crouched on the floor next to Haymitch. My throat is raw from screaming and I see blood caked on my nails. I see that I have scratched my left leg bloody, no doubt do to Cato cutting off that leg in my dream. Haymitch shuts off the shower when my shivering has made me more alert.
Peeta grabs a large fluffy towel and wraps me in it. He lifts me off my feet and we are leaving his room swiftly. Peeta looks exhausted and on edge as he pushed through the doors to the hospital. My mom and talking to Haymitch when their attention is alerted to me, shivering in a damp towel now. My mom asks Peeta to go to my room and get dry clothes. She busies herself on cleaning the gouges on my leg.
"Sweetheart," Haymitch begins, "What happened?"
I am groggy still, my mind feels clouded and confused, "I don't know. I feel asleep waiting for Peeta. I dreamed that I was back in the games, and Cato cut off my leg. I was torn apart by mutts. Then I woke up in the shower."
Haymitch makes the connection to my leg and my guilt for Peeta losing his. He frowns and holds my hand. I watch my mom wrap my leg in gauze and wrap a bandage over it.
"Haymitch, she always has nightmares at night. She did the entire week she was here." My mom sounds defeated and upset.
"Let Peeta stay with her tonight." Haymitch says knowing that Peeta prevents my nightmares as I do for him.
She pushes Haymitch out and closes the curtain so she can help peel the soaking wet clothes off me. She redresses my rib treatment and gives me the clothes Peeta brought back. I numbly pull on shorts so my dressing can be changed easily and then shroud myself in a thick long sleeve shirt.
I climb into bed and Peeta wraps a large blanket around us. I wind my cold hands into his shirt and tuck my feet under his legs. His warm arms drape around me in comfort.
It's silent now as my mom and Haymitch have returned to their rooms. Peeta kisses my cheek and sighs.
"I'm sorry I wasn't there." He whispers.
"Can we just not talk about it." I whisper back as warm tears spill from my eyes.
"Okay darling." He says, "Sleep tight, I've got you now. Nothing will hurt you as long as I'm here."
I sleep peacefully until I am softly roused from sleep by Peeta. He says he is late for construction and that my mom has been waiting for two hours to change my bandage. He kisses me goodbye and heads to work. It's not long before I am leaving the hospital, off to change for the day. Even in the cool underground I can feel the brute humidity from outside. My leg feels raw and achy with each step I take. I hate myself for what I did last night. I rifle through the closet of clothes Cinna's daughter sent to me while I was in the hospital. Apparently Cinna designed so many clothes for me that she wanted me to have them. They are all beautiful, and not all of them are dresses. I've decided if Peeta likes it when I dress nicely I was going to make more of an effort. I would never admit it to my mom or anyone else but I loved how dresses made me feel pretty and feminine. I pick a soft light blue dress, it's floaty and light with thin straps. It is perfect for the humid day outside.
I wander around the construction zone looking for Peeta. I desperately wanted to know what he was doing with Finnick so late last night.
I find no evidence of Peeta or Haymitch around the newly built houses. I spot Gale sitting in the shade escaping the late afternoon heat. I pluck up all the courage I have and I move over to him. He doesn't say anything but scoots over so I can have some of the shade too.
We sit in silence, it's painful and awkward. There's so much I want to say but I am still angry with him.
"Why'd you do it, Gale?" I ask as I fidget with the hem of my dress.
"I knew Paylor was deceived. I wanted you to understand that. You were so stubborn and angry. I…" He doesn't complete his sentence.
"I… What?" I ask, prodding him to finish his sentence.
He shakes his head and doesn't continue, "Gale Hawthorne! Just talk to me!" I cry out in frustration. "What cant you tell me? We shared everything in 12, why can't you talk to me now? You were my best friend. What happened to you?"
The sky is darkening, storms are moving in quickly. The dropping temperature has set a chill in my bones.
He gets up and walks away from me. Not only does it piss me off but I recognize it as a slap in the face. Gale would never act like this. What's changed him?
I run after him, trying to keep pace with his long strides. Rain is beginning to splatter the ground.
"Gale!" I scream at him, "Talk to me please!"
"What happened to me? You did." He yells back over the roaring wind.
I don't know what to say, I stare back at him in shock. Rain falls steadily now.
"The reaping changed everything. The games where you pretended to love him, marry him and carry his baby changed you. I watched that screen and saw someone I didn't know. That changes people. I was forced to watch, and bet on my best friend's life as if it was a sport. That will change a person."
I see a hover craft descend onto the landing area not far from us. People scramble from it trying to find shelter.
"I did what I had to do to stay alive! Do you think I like how I pretended to love him and go along with that lie? But you know what, that lie saved my life. I don't regret it. How can you stand here and belittle me for surviving the hunger games 3 times? I did what I had to do to come back and salvage what shreds of life I had left."
"Oh okay, so faking a pregnancy and dumbing yourself down to a stupid girl twirling in pretty dress struck with love is a survival technique now? Do you even hear yourself? What would Prim or your father say about this? How can you believe that crap the capitol fed you. Those people fed off that lie only to watch it be destroyed in their arena."
I see Haymitch leave the hover craft and yell at us to come inside. I reach out and slap Gale across the face. I suppose this attack provokes Haymitch to grab two men next to him and race over.
"How dare you." I yell at him, "What has happened to you!"
Tears are rolling down my face, as Gale has used the two most painful deaths in my life against me.
"You did this to me. The minute you decided you couldn't live without him. You picked a boy you pretended to love over our friendship. So why don't you go back to him and pretend you're happy. I see right through your little game, soon enough he will too. Just tell me one thing, was the pregnancy real? We all know you had to do more than just kiss him on tv to get him to act like he really loved you."
I an enraged and slap him again, he stumbles to the ground. I intend to hit him but before I can reach him I am pulled off of him.
"Why are you being like this!" I yell over the wind and downpour as Haymitch holds me back.
"Because I love you! I can't stand seeing you with him."
Haymitch lessens his grip on me as he anticipates Peeta's reaction. Peeta and Finnick had just stepped into view as Gale answered my question. I am floored, complete unable to move. Haymitch and Finnick struggle to restrain Peeta.
"How can you even think saying you love me would make up for how much you've just hurt me. I don't ever want to talk to you again!" I yell at him.
"Good, I don't like to keep company with liars."
It's all I have left in me not to hit him again. I turn and run from all of them, the stinging rain and hail pour from the sky. I run toward the construction area intended on the bakery but a jagged cobblestone sends me sprawling to the ground. The grief of the fight has hit me full force as my body is shaking with sobs. I feel so hurt and betrayed that I just want to give up. Gale has hurt me so deeply that I can't wrap my brain around it.
I feel someone effortlessly pick me up and run for the bakery. I know it is Peeta just by the arms. Inside we slide to the floor in a mess of water. I turn my face into his chest and try to stifle the loud sobs. Peeta doesn't say anything but pull me close to him. It takes an hour for me to cry myself out.
"Katniss, what happened out there?" He whispers and pulls damp hair out of my eyes.
"He said he loved me." I hiccup, fighting off more sobs.
"Why did you hit him? That would have been my job, sweetheart." Peeta consoles.
"He said our relationship wasn't real. He said everyone thinks the pregnancy was real because I would have had to do much more than kiss you for a merchant boy to ever pretend to love a girl from the seam." I start crying again as I reveal the worst of the hurt I feel. "I feel like it is true. Back home we would have never had this. The games gave us our chance at love. How can we be so happy based off of something so evil and twisted. He called me a liar because I pretended to love you in the first game."
Peeta is tense and angry, I can feel it, "You know I would have never ever considered making you sleep with me to pretend to love you. I loved you from the first time I saw you. My feelings have always been real. It just took you longer to come around to them. He knows nothing about us. Don't let his anger and jealousy make you think anything less of yourself, darling."
I can't help but think that my relationship with Gale is over, so many hurtful things have been said i doubt there is even anything that can be said to fix the wrongs. Peeta holds me tight, whispering beautiful things into my ear until I am in better spirits.
He kisses my cheek and pulls me to my feet. He swiftly puts me on the counter and says, "close your eyes."
I smile weakly and shut my eyes. I hear him moving around and he begins talking to me.
"I had something planned for a couple of days, but I think right now is when I need to do this." I feel him gently pick me up and carry me upstairs.
"Can I open my eyes?" I whisper.
"Almost, be patient my love" He sets me down on something soft.
There is more rustling of items and then Peeta softly says I can open my eyes. I see I am sitting on a soft blanket, and spread between us is a little platter of bread, fruit and other snack like things. He has poured us large glasses of the wine we had the first night I returned to him. Candles are scattered all around us, emitting a soft yellow glow in the room.
"Peeta, this is so wonderful." I smile, I feel the ugly things Gale has said already leaving my mind.
We eat and drink, Peeta putting forward his best charm and comedic efforts. I think the combination of wine and Peeta have made me dizzy, and warm. He tells me he has yet another surprise. He pulls an old radio out and presses play. Soft sweet music plays in the background.
"How about a dance?" He smiles, and I oblige without hesitation.
He twirls and spins me around the room gently. I always though dancing with Peeta would be something I'd never get to do. His leg limited him so much… I suddenly look down and remember we are shoeless. I see ten sets of fleshy human toes connected to his leg.
"Peeta! Your leg!" I gasp.
He smiles and doesn't miss a beat in our dance, "Finnick took me to see the doctor that cured him. We went to district 2, to a doctor who just recently discovered this medicine. My leg grew back good as new within 5 hours."
I lean up and kiss him, he dips me backwards and then back up. I laugh and lean into him as we dance more. I love him so much, how could anyone not see that.
We sit back down and enjoy the rest of the bottle of wine snuggled against each other. My clothes have dried out for the most part, and my hair has curled and waved wickedly. Peeta says he likes it when it's down because he loves touching it. He softly rubs his finger across my cheek and turns my lips toward him for a searing kiss.
"You know I love you right?" He whispers between kisses.
"Yes." I reply, "And I love you."
"Katniss, you mean so much to me. Every day I realize that the only thing that has come out of the pain and suffering we've shared is this love. I wouldn't ever change a thing about our past because it gave me you. You give me a million reasons why I need to wake up each morning, from getting to see you in beautiful clothes, to your infectious smile and ability to love unconditionally. You are brave, kind and passionate, you make me fall in love with you even more every day. I was a fool to wait so long to tell you I loved you, I know that I will never let you go. You are my everything, my future and my past. I love you for all that you are, and all that you have yet to be." He stares deeply into my eyes, which have sprung with tears of bliss.
His way with words has always mesmerized me, "Katniss, I never want to live another day knowing you aren't mine. I want to build a future from the ashes of our past, I can think of no better way than sealing the flame of our love with this."
He pulls a glistening silver ring, set inside a simple heart is the pearl I have cherished, the pearl he gave me in the quell.
"Peeta…" I gasp.
His beautiful blue eyes glisten a thousand times more beautifully that the stunning ring between us, "I love you so much darling, it would be the greatest honor of my life if I could call you my wife. Katniss Everdeen, will you marry me?"