Okay, I know I have taken forever to review. Bad me*slaps self on wrist* so I will try to make it up to you guys. But first O_O more comments!
Soangel- I am your first * teary eyes* sorry, partial sex joke.
xPaiige and the Starsx – Really? Eh. But thank you for the compliments is* warm and fuzzy now* but as to your other question, I cannot fully answer fully for I will give away future plot developments but I can say that if you re-read Kalin did not come inside of her, and that is all I can say . * wants to tell you but cant* AHHHH!
well crap- XD wonderful name! Lol. Thank you, I stressed over this scene for a long time. My fiance wont stop teasing me about it.
Hikaru69- What would you say if you found your girlfriend alone and half naked in her apartment with another man who was sexually superior than you? Well, whatever it is, it wont be what Ben says XD
StarCharmer- WHY DOES NO ONE LIKE BEN! Sheesh, havent really introduced the guy yet! XD
chelseratops- hot sexy man XD sorry, makes me giggle.
DearCupcake-*turns red * im not amazing, I just have a very vocal fiance and awsome readers!
Wholegrainmustard – Again, another vote for Ben to dissapear XD poor man. And ew? I would not like that my hotdogs XD but you know what now I so have to put that in the story.
Inquisitive L – :D delicious? I love the words you guys use, makes me feel like some writing goddess XD stop giving me a big head people!
ksea – Just please don't die of an overdose!
St. madness – your both mad, haha get it? Heh? Oh -_- joke fell flat XD and as to your question, all shall be answered in time!
Dragonman10 – hahaha XD don't try too hard on my account kay? YAY! I somehow became the master of cliffhangers even though I hate them so much when I read them yet I do it to my readers.
And to all those who reviewed and I did not reply to thank you! Here is the next chapter to Fatal Attraction! Thank you so much!
Rebecca's POV
"Ben?" I said his name again as if I could just magically blink my eyes and he would not be standing here at my door with me wearing nothing but a thin robe.
Well fuck me! Again!
He took in my robe and messed up hair with a cool appraisal in those blue eyes, but it somehow made me feel defensive, as if he were already pointing a finger and calling me a cheater. I shifted uncomfortably, keeping the door as shut as possible in hopes he would not see Kalin no doubt glowering at my backside.
"I went to take a shower only to find I had no clean clothes in the bathroom." I said in a defensive tone, and his eyes brows rose at the sound, and I felt slightly guilty. Great, like I needed more guilt. "I am sorry, Ben." I said softly, and touched my forehead with my hand.
"Its okay, I get that your stressed out. I ran into Crystal on her way out of yoga class. She seemed kind of pissed off and all that, and she said there was something I needed to see and told me to head over here straight away." he smiled, his ruffle short brown hair making him look boyish. "But you seem busy. Is there someone in there with you?" a simple question, there was not a hint of accusation or knowing in his eyes.
I studied Ben, noting the differences between him and Kalin. Ben stood at least a foot shorter than Kalin, almost my height, and his body was not as hard and shaped as Kalin's either. I shook my head hard as soon as I realized what I was doing. Crap, I as not going to start that.
"Yeah," I said absent mindedly. "A student I am tutoring, but he dropped by right after yoga so I made him wait while I took a shower, and well yeah, then you came."
"Oh, is this the same one you have been tutoring for the past month?" he looked curious, and I nodded, dreading what was coming next. "Well, may I come in and meet him? Maybe I can keep him company while you go take your shower. You look like you need it."
Ouch, thank you Ben for reminding me why it was so hard to feel guilty about this.
"Okay," I said uncertainly. Surely Kalin would not say anything about what we had done?He would not fuck me over like that, would he? He seemed to care enough about me that I didn't think he would, but then again he also wanted me for himself and Ben was that kind of obsticale.
Okay, well, time to see if Kalin was an honorable man.
"Come on in," I said, finally standing back and holding the door wide open. In a moment of panic I turned to see if my clothes were still laying where they had been discarded, since I was sure they had been there when I had come out of the bathroom. But they were not there now, and I had a moment of silent relief that Kalin had thought to pick those up.
Okay, so far so good.
But Ben had stopped in the door way, and I didn't notice until I had moved into the apartment and did not hear the door shut. I stopped, looking behind me to find him still standing in the door way, his gaze locked with Kalin's. I looked at Kalin to find him standing tall and proud, muzzle and straight jacket off, his body strong and . . . oh so . . . delicious.
I shook my head hard again, and forced a confused smile at Ben. He did not seem to pay attention to me, him and Kalin still seeming caught up in each other. Okay, I did not know what was going on. I knew the feeling of male testosterone on the rise, and this was not that feeling.
"Ben, this is Kalin. Kalin, this is Ben, my-" but Ben cut in before I could finish.
"Friend." my head whipped to look at him. Say what?
"Huh?" I said blankly.
"Me and Rebecca have been friends since we met in the hospital a couple of months ago. Isn't that right, Rebecca?" Ben gave me a smile, finally looking away form Kalin, and I found myself gritting my teeth in frustration and anger, as well as confusion.
"Yeah, whatever." I muttered, crossing my arms over my chest. I was screwed now, since I had Ben here all but renouncing me from his sight. Sheesh, from the way he was acting I was surprised he hadn't denied knowing me at all. Was he really that intimidated my Kalin? I mean, yeah, he was drop dead gorgeous, but still!
Grow a back bone! I wanted to yell, but my mouth stayed firmly locked shut. I turned my head to look away from Ben, to hide how much this rejection had hurt, even though I had been fighting to break up with him for months, and caught Kalin staring at me. And I mean open-eyed-I-refuse-to-blink staring. And the emotion in his eyes was enough to make my tears well over.
I care for you, his eyes spoke to me. I need you, and I will never hurt you. I wanted to believe it, but everything was just moving so fast. I knew this should simplify things. I should be able to just shuck off this hurt and enjoy Kalin all the more. But us having sex seemed to have complicated things between us more than they had been, and I did not know what to do. It seemed wrong to be with him like this behind closed doors, him wearing his muzzle and jacket for the rest of the world and then showing me the true side of him. I couldn't do it. And I didn't know if I was ready for someone to claim me and love me the way I knew he would.
"You said you were going to keep him company while I showered." I reminded Ben with a snap to my voice, which he either ignored or did not hear.
"Did I?" he sounded perplexed, confused, and I looked at him again, eyes dry, and disbelief making them wide. "Sorry, Rebecca, but I can't. I have a meeting with my teacher in about ten minuets."
Lying. Little. Git.
I wanted to strangle him to death right on my doorstep.
But before I could do that, my cellphone rang, and I reached out with hand shaking with anger to answer it.
"What!" I snapped into it.
"I need you at the club." my brothers cool voice slid over the phone, and it made me want to puke. Like I needed his crap right now. And yet, everything just seemed to want to come at me at once!
"Whatever!" I snapped, and knowing what he was going to say, I said "I will be there when I get there." and I snapped the phone shut on whatever he was going to say.
"Who was that?" Ben asked, as if he were truly concerned. I was done with playing the homemaker. I was downright pissed and tired.
"Ben?" I asked, my voice flat and calm.
"Yeah, Rebecca?" he seemed almost relieved, like he expected me to hit him. I still might, so he better not get so damn happy.
"Get the fuck out of my apartment," and with that I turned on my heel and went towards my dresser. I heard Ben muttered a shock response, something about seeing me later, and then the door shut.
"Are you okay?" Kalin asked, true concern in his voice. I felt his presence more strongly as he moved closer, and it made my skin crawl and how comforting and familiar it was.
"No!" I yelled, spinning around to face him, and I had to give it to him, he didn't step back from my anger, but stayed his ground to take it head on. "My own boyfriend just fucking threw me at your feet like I was a piece of property, you took advantage of me in my own bed, we didn't use a freaking condom, so thank god you didn't come, or I would be raising hell." I turned my back on him, yanking out clothes with angry jerks. "And then my fucking bastard of a brother wants me to come and play piano at his goddamn club. So no, Kalin. I am not. Fucking. Okay!"
He didn't say anything, nor did he try and touch me, which was good because I was at my breaking point as it was. I think he had touched me I would have broken down in his arms, and then I would have lost all respect for myself. I would not stoop down to having someone take care of my feelings. No one but me.
But goddammit, I could have loved Kalin. I really could have.
Just like from the look in his eyes, I knew he already loved me.
I stripped off the rob right there. What was the point? It was nothing he hadn't already seen and I was in no mood to be discreet and shy.
"I thought you were going to take a shower." he said in a mild tone, knowing he was treading on dangerous ground. I felt like I could go mad at anytime, and kick the hell out of him. Or kiss him to death, either seemed a pleasurable choice, but not both would end in the kind of outlet my anger needed.
"I don't have time if I don't want my brother pissed as hell at me when I arrive. Not like he isn't going to be already." I muttered, pulling on a new bra and shirt.
"What kind of man is your brother?" he asked, and I could hear the frown in his voice. How could I describe my brother?
"You will see when you meet him."
"So I am going with you?" he asked quietly, and I could sense an undertone of pleasure. He thought I was going to leave him here at my apartment? I was pissed but I wasn't a bitch host.
"Would you have allowed me to go by myself?" I asked, and he said nothing, so I knew the answer already. He would not have allowed me to walk out that door without him either right on my heels or following me at a distance. "That's what I thought." I hissed, moving over to my mirror that hung on the wall to tie my hair into a bun so I didn't look a complete mess.
"You look fine," he said so softly I almost didn't hear it. My heart swelled and I swear to god I was going to cry. But I somehow managed to keep a straight face and cool demeanor as I turned on my heel to find my bag with my shoes it in. In the process I picked up all my pictures that I had dribbled blood on and threw them in the trash. Okay, honestly, I threw away even the ones I hadn't gotten blood on, that was a testament to my mood.
"You asked me if I knew that woman," he said by way of trying to divert the mood. But I put a stop to that quick.
"I don't give a fuck!" I snapped, not even bothering to see his expression. The one thing Kalin did not know about me was I could keep grudges, and I could breed them good. I stood, now with my shoes and socks on, and went to my closet to get my keyboard and its case. I hadn't played much lately, but I hadn't needed to with Kalin here to keep my company. Looks like I might need to pick that back up.
I went and dragged out the heavy case none too gently, not even caring if any damage came to the stupid thing. Kalin moved slightly closer, his expression questioning, and I gave him a glare that answered his question. No, I would not let him carry the damn thing for me. If his hands came anywhere near me I was going to bite them off, so help me god.
"Come on, I would rather not drag this out longer than I need too. Because I am going to do this gig, come home, and then I am going to get drunk." and I moved past him to the door, lugging the case at my side, steeling myself against the weight. I knew my arms were going to be begging for relief by the time I made it to the club, since we had to walk and all.
Then, suddenly, the case was gone from my hands, and I glance back to find Kalin had plucked it from my iron grip as if I had been only holding it with a feather light grip with a single finger. I spun on him right there in the middle of the hall way, with some of my classmates passing by, some stopping to stare at this new gorgeous stranger. I was about to rip him a new one, how dare he try to be a gentle men, but I had apparently sparked his temper. Again. Twice in less than twenty minuets, seems I was on my way to making records.
"Stop being stupid." he hissed softly, leaning close to me so that no one would overhear. But from my steely expression and his, it was obvious to everyone that we were fighting. "Go ahead and be mad, throw a fit, ignore me for this whole trip if you wish. But stop being stupid!"
"How am I being stupid!" I demanded, wanting to slap him for making me want to cry again. God damn all men!
"You know this case is heavy, and you know I am stronger than you are and I am willing to carry it. And yet you allow your anger to get in the way of logic and it is causing pain to your body."
"Like you did?" I hissed, and immediately regretted it. It was a low hit, and he didn't deserve that spat at him with such venom. I was sore, as I would have been from making love to anyone.
His expression turned stark and hurt, and he drew back away from me. God damn, I really regretted it.
"I caused pain to your heart, but I will never allow you to cause harm to yourself." was his simple and quite reply. His eyes were now closed off, and his posture was stiff and unwelcoming. I felt like a bitch.
I opened my mouth to apologize, my anger deflating, when I felt a familiar presence and I stiffened.
"Well, well, Kalin and Ben just aren't good enough for you, are they Rebecca?" Crystal's voice sneered. Kalin's eyes tightened with anger at these words, but I could take care of myself.
"And apparently being a boy-stealing skank isn't enough for you, now you also have to be a world wide bitch." I hissed, spinning to face her. She looked stunned at the insult, but then she caught sight of Kalin, who she did not actually know was Kalin.
"Well, well, aren't you a pretty thing," she drawled, her body automatically trying to take a more seducing posture, her face transforming into the picture of lust.
Ohhhhh, did that set me.
"Cheating bitch!" I hissed and stormed past her, glancing back only to see Kalin laughing softly as he moved around Crystal as if she were nothing more than a puddle on the floor. That was something good to see, since every guy seemed to drool over her. Not to mention her boyfriend was the guy I had liked for two years, and she had stolen him from me, knowing full well how I felt. It was one of the reasons I had moved through so many boyfriends so quickly.
Needless to say, I did not care much for him anymore.
"You have a sharp tongue when you need it." Kalin said, and I could hear the praise and pride in his voice, and it made my chest swell. I actually gave him a slight smile over my shoulder, thinking that maybe this day would not end so bad after all. Maybe this would work out.
I hoped so, because my sanity could not take anything more happening.
(****)
Me and Kalin approached my brothers club at a slow walk. Sometime during the trip he had managed to spark up a conversation about my music, the only subject that seemed safe enough to talk about without getting personal. I enjoyed talking about my music, but Kalin seemed more interested in how I ended up getting into it, and why I continued it. It was tricky, to explain to him my . . . way of doing thing. I also had to dance around the fact of my frequent doctors visits, mostly because I did not want to think about blood right now.
It brought back some . . . blushing moments to say the least.
"How much do you make?" he asked, and it wondered if that was a safe question to answer.
"Well, one a good week, and I can almost twenty thousand dollars, sometimes more, if I pack all my spare moments with gigs."
"Twenty thousand?" he asked with a stunned expression. "And yet you cannot buy a car?" ahhhh, stuck! Most of the money went towards college, and the other went towards the doctors bills. And yes, they were that expensive, from all the trial medications, the tests, sometimes we even had to order new medical equipment in order to test my blood in new ways. I thought it was pointless, but I would never put Philip down that way. He seemed so sure he would find a way to stop my body from making extra blood. And I was starting to get the feeling he was blaming Kalin for the new speed my body made blood.
But that was crazy, wasn't it? He relaxed me more than anyone else.
Well, cept for latley.
"Uh, no, my bills are expensive."
"What bills?" he questioned with a suspicious look in his eyes. "Surely you do not mean purely school? I have seen the amount of tuition, and it is about thirty thousand a year. What other bills do you have?"
"Um, well I pay electricity. I have to pay for my instruments to be in perfect condition. Then the little things they need sometimes, like tune ups, strings, picks, sometimes I buy a new case if the old one gets too beat up. Then food, clothes, supplies." I shrugged, hoping he wouldn't see that all those things still did not add up the difference.
But I was once again saved today when we made it to my brothers club.
"Well, here we are," I said, shielding my eyes from the late afternoon sun to get a better view. It was pretty busy, as it usually was. My brother did know how to run a business.
"There you are!" I flinched at the sound of my brothers voice, and sighed as I saw him coming out of the back door to the club. He looked angry, but then again he always looked angry.
"Hey brother!" I called, trying to make this day turn around, but he did not respond to my greeting. My brother stopped when he saw Kalin, though, and I got the sensation that he was feeling somewhat intimidated.
"Whoring yourself out again are you?" my brother asked with a slight tinge of bitterness to his voice. I felt shock light my face, and I could only guess the expression was mirrored on Kalin's as well.
"Excuse me?" I sputtered, hoping I had heard him wrong. What the hell was that supposed to mean.
"Whatever, it doesn't matter." my brother said it with a dismissive air, but I was still recovering from shock. Was he trying to humiliate me because Kalin was here? And then he said something that dug me in a deeper hole. "Your god damn doctor isn't going to take you away again is he? You already saw him once this week, I mean that is when you are supposed to see him or whatever right?"
"What doctor?" Kalin asked in confusion, and I was cursing under my breath, hoping my brother would just keep him mouth shut. But of course he wouldn't why would he?
"The stupid doctor Rebecca here has to see every week for something or other. Something from birth, think she may be dying or something."
"I am not dying!" I shouted at my brother, stomping forward, disbelief clear on my face. "Stop talking about this your know nothing of! You know the doctors visits are important, I have been going ever since I was born! Why do you have to be such a dick!"
Yeah, shouldn't have decided it was a good idea to stand up to my brother, I hadn't noticed he was drunk as could be.
His hand came across my face hard enough to knock me off my feet. I cried out in surprise, tear rushing down my face at the sudden stinging pain. My brother had struck me before, I didn't know why I didn't think he would do it again.
"Don't you ever talk to me like that, you little whore! The only thing you were born for is so you could make money for mom and dad. So shut you mouth and serve your-" my brother never got a chance to say more. Because my keyboard case suddenly came up from behind him, hitting his head and his upper back. I heard a loud cracking noise, and then my brothers eyes closed and he fell into a heap on the ground as if he were no more than a rag doll.
My mouth fell open, and I stared at the heap of meat that was my brother. I wasn't worried he was dead, I could see him breathing, and he wasn't bleeding or anything. But had Kalin really just done that? He could have killed him! What was he thinking?
My stunned gaze flew up to match Kalin's, who was standing there with the keyboard case still in hand, panting as if he had run miles, anger still defining the hard lines of his face and eyes. But when his gaze met mine, understanding suddenly lit them, but he did not look horrified or guilty.
"Becca . . ." he said softly, but I could not let go of the horror of what he had done.
"What did you do, Kalin?" I whispered, tears rolling down my face.
Life was about to be hell for me from now on.
Kalin's POV
Things got a little blurry after I had struck Becca's brother. The cops and the ambulance came, and Becca went to speak to them, telling me to stay out of sight. I did not allow myself to feel happy over the fact that she was protecting me. Things were ruined between the two of us, I could tell that as clear as day. She knew why I had done it, after I had sputtered it out when she had moved away from me every time I had tried to touch her. I had just made leeway just to destroy it all in my blind anger.
She told them what had happened, and the cops said it was self defense, and they said they would have to wait for he brother to awaken to see if he wanted to press charges? Whatever the hell that meant. I was half tempted to ask one of my clan members to sneak into the hospital and make sure he never woke up.
But I would never be able to go back to me clan if me and Becca did not fully join. We had made love, which was the joining of the soul, but I had not taken enough of her body in order for us to complete the joining of the body. And if we did not complete it, I would be on the verge of sanity and madness, forever, until it was finally done. If I was to leave her presence I did not know what would happen, this had never happened in all of our history. I had yet to even tell her about me or my people, and from the looks of this I was weary as to how she would take it. Modern day women were supposed to be stronger and more open minded than the older fashioned one, but I knew she would mistake my for a vampire, unless I could prove to her otherwise.
The cops had gone now, as well as the ambulance, and I approached her, standing with her arms crossed over her chest, seeming deep in thought or misery. Was what I had done so bad? Her brother seemed like a bad person, would it really be so bad if he fell off the end of the planet? Or was it something I did not know of? And what was this about a doctor?
"Becca," I said softly, reaching out to touch her back.
"Go away, Kalin!" she said softly, and I could hear tears in her voice. It hurt my heart, I did not want my other half to hurt so. I love her, her smile, her laugh, her whole being. She was the most purest and beautiful person I had ever met in my life. And it was a long, long life, though over half of it had been spent in blinding madness. Waiting for her to set me free.
But now it seemed like the price of me being free was going to be harming her. It wasn't worth it, my happiness versus hers, she would always come first, no question.
"But, Becca, please just look at me. I have to speak with you. You did it, you set me free-" I got no more out of my mouth, for she was like a rubber band that had been wound too tight. She had taken what I had said the wrong way, and siezed on it to ease her hurting.
"If all you wanted was your damn freedom you didn't have to take me to bed to do it!" she screamed and began to run from me. I reached out and grabbed her, only to jerk back when she spun and hissed at me, actually hissed at me between her teeth, like a wild animal. It was pure and carnel, and I knew I had hurt more deeply than anyone ever had.
"Becca," I began again, trying to keep back as she began walking backwards. She could not leave, dammit! I didn't know what would happen if she did. "Please, we need to talk."
"I don't want to talk to you anymore, Kalin. If you had really cared about me you would have kept that damn muzzle on until I was really ready. Congratulations, your free, now stay the hell away from me." and she bolted. I sighed, knowing it was pointless to chase her and make a scene, but I just wish she would have listened to me for a minuet.
I am Thorian. You will never want again. You will never be lonely. These were the thing I wanted to say to her, needed to, and I had flubbed it. God damn!
"You would be ashamed of me, if you could see me now Thais." I said the name as it was properly pronounced, Ty-ees. The name of my sister, the one who I had not seen since the day my mother had died.
I didn't know what was going to happen now. Rebecca was now in danger, I would not be there when the guards came back. They had known she was mine, they had just been biding their time, waiting for her to give me back my sanity, and hoping they could get what they wanted from her. I had to protect her, but I didn't know if I would even be in the right mind to do that.
What did you do, when the woman you loved was so beautiful it made your heart ache?
The world hadn't fucked me over this time, I had done it on my own. I wanted my clan. I wanted my sister, but most of all I wanted the love of my life. She was so perfect me for me, why could I not be for her?
I would do all I could, but I could not guarantee my own sanity.
Madness was sneaky like that.
While I could I enjoyed the feel of nature around me, allowed it flow through me like it did for all of my people. It sang for me, welcomed me, offered me comfort and shelter. But I could not listen to its call right now, I had things I had to do.
Even if the woman I loved fought me to death on it.