The song that goes with this chapter is 'More Than It Seems' by Kutless. The # will tell you when to start playing it.
Chapter Twenty: Twilight Child, Sunrise Child
The cavern both awed and scared Jaina. On the left side of the cavern was a burning inferno, with a floor of burning coals the flames bouncing around a dark hooded figure standing in the midst of it all.
On the right side was an icy floor, with glacier walls and snow-banks, somehow unable to melt despite the heat that was radiating from within. A slight woman stood wrapped up in a white cape facing the dark figure on the other side.
Separating the two sides was a long stretch of dirt. Obsidian went to the left to join the dark figure, while Diamond went to join the woman on the other side. Jaina, unsure of where to go, continued to walk down the dirt path.
"Hello, Jaina," The woman said. Jaina sucked in a breath. She knew that voice anywhere, the voice that sang loving lullabies to her as a baby, laughed with her, and gently trained her.
The voice of her mother.
"Mommy?" Jaina whispered. She tried to run up to Jocelyn, but was stopped by a glacier appearing in her path. When she backed away, the glacier disappeared.
"I'm sorry, love," Jocelyn said sadly, now removing the hood of her cape so Jaina could see her face. "I cannot leave this spot, nor can you join me."
"What is this place?" Jaina asked.
"A split of your sub-conscious," A deep male voice said from behind her.
Jaina turned to look into the man's deep blue eyes that were framed by disheveled black hair. On his cheek was a scar of a broken circle. She had never seen this man before in her life, but knew who he was.
Her father. Xanatos.
"Why am I here?" Jaina demanded.
"So you can see the paths that lie before you," Xanatos said, walking up and down his boundary, his black cloak billowing behind him.
"Yeah," Obsidian said from where she was crouched on top of a black rock. She jumped down to land beside Xanatos. "You can join the Dark Side AKA the Fun and Rebellious Side."
"Or you can walk down the path in the light of the Jedi," Jocelyn interrupted.
"Where peace and truth rule, not chaos and fear," Diamond said, a serious look on her face.
"Please tell me this isn't going to be just you all telling me the cost-benefits of each side," Jane said dryly.
"Oh, no, we have something better," Jocelyn said, smiling. She walked down the edge of her icy pavilion and came to a wider part of the dirt path. Jaina followed her and stopped where her mother did. At her feet, water came up out of the ground and pooled at her feet.
The water was clean and pure, like the pools outside had once been. Jaina looked down to see her reflection and saw Obsidian and Diamond both standing on either side of her. A drop of water from above fell into the pool and rippled the water. As it did so, the images melded together so that Jaina face was gone and replaced by half of Obsidian's face and half of Diamond's.
"So, basically," Jaina said, turning to Diamond. "You're the part of me that's the Light," She turned to Obsidian. "And you're the part of me that's Dark."
"Got that right," Obsidian said, grinning viciously. "If you want to get all psychological and what not, I'm the physical embodiment of your inner Dark Side."
"You're not what I want to be," Jaina said, turning her face away from the girl. Obsidian chuckled and grabbed Jaina's chin so that their eyes met.
"Ah, but yet you need me in ways you do not fully comprehend for all your wisdom," Obsidian said smugly.
"She is right," Diamond said, laying a hand on Jaina's shoulder. "You cannot truly know and live in the Light if you have not touched the Dark, and seen what it creates. You can't just live in a bubble, thinking it will never happen to you. You have to see the reality of how easy it is to fall. This isn't just a choice in your destiny. It's a choice in how you live your life."
"I've never heard that before," Jaina said.
"It's not something usually discussed," Obsidian said, leaning on Jaina with her elbow on Jaina's shoulder. "You don't see too many redeemed Dark Jedi running around in that fancy-shmancy Temple of yours, do you? They're all having way too much fun over here."
"Oh, for pity's sake, Obsidian!" Diamond exclaimed, finally losing her composure. "What is really the 'fun' of turning to the Dark Side? You guys are just like Jedi, just evil and risk greater chance of deformation and death by lightsaber!"
Obsidian thought for a moment, truly dumbstruck
"We have cookies." She muttered after a long, awkward silence.
"Really? 'Join the Dark Side, we have cookies'?" Jaina said, crossing her arms. "That saying's about as old as both the Jedi and Sith Codes combined."
"Cookies!" Xanatos cried out, staring at Obsidian. "We are Sith! We don't have any need for cookies!"
"Is that in the Sith Code?" Obsidian asked, aghast. "I really need to read that thing all the way through."
Xanatos clapped a hand to his forehead and muttered something unintelligible.
"You know, now that I think about it, Dad," Jaina said with a wicked grin. "Despite what everyone at the Temple says, you were never a Sith Lord. You received no training from a Sith. You're just a highly glorified wanna- be! You're about as bad as the actors in those cheesy holo-vids about Jedi!"
"I beg your pardon?" Xanatos snapped, outraged, turning to glare at Jaina.
"Well, she has a point, now that I think about it." Jocelyn said thoughtfully. "You turned to the Dark Side, but were never truly a Sith."
Xanatos' pale face turned as red as the inferno behind him, while Obsidian was doubled over laughing.
"While this conversation has been entertaining and enlightening, I don't think Jaina is any closer to deciding which path to take," Diamond said, having controlled her temper again.
"No, it hasn't," Jaina agreed. "However, it has made me aware that I can't ignore the issue. I can choose now, but my heart and mind might change later. But I have to change them now so that I can embrace my decision." She took a deep breath. "And I think my heart at least has changed. My mind with my wisdom and logic may not agree, but I must let my heart lead on this matter."
She turned to Xanatos and took a few steps so that she was standing right in front of him. The room was deadly quiet.
"I should have done this a long time ago," Jaina said, her hazel eyes meeting his blue ones. "It would have saved me a lot of heartache and bitterness. Father."
"Yes?" Xanatos encouraged. For the first time since she entered the cave, he actually seemed to look at her like a father would a daughter.
"I forgive you," Jaina said. With those words spoken, her heart felt lighter. "And I ask for your forgiveness for holding a grudge for so long."
Xanatos smiled softly. He cautiously reached his hand out. While he did not—nor could not—touch her, he gently stroked the air beside her cheek.
"We may have chosen different paths," He said. "But I don't think I could be prouder. Yes, I forgive you."
"Thank you," Jaina said, smiling.
"Jaina," Jaina turned towards Jocelyn. "You made a hard decision, one not many could make, and one you may have to make again. You have done well, my angel. I will always be with you, and be waiting for you for when it is your time. I love you."
"I love you too, Mom," Jaina said, blinking back tears. She turned back to Xanatos, who was watching her intently. She met his eyes, her heart lightened as she, for the first time in her life, felt true affection for her father. It was not a love, but she knew that the feeling was brought on by her forgiveness of his deeds
"You will do well as a Jedi for sure," Xanatos said. "You have compassion, logic, diplomacy, loyalty, and a very unique combination of mine and your mother's dueling skills. I've seen you duel, and there's no denying it. It should have been Qui-Gon's first clue. However, you are also cunning, quick witted, persuasive and tactics-minded. You would make a very fine Sith. But I will not try to lure you either way. From now on, your choices are yours alone. You are your own person. All I can say is good luck. My daughter."
"Thank you," Jaina said. She smiled up at him. "Daddy."
Xanatos simply smiled. A true smile that hadn't graced his face since long before his death. Jaina—whether she knew it or not—had just called him what he'd always wanted to be called by her.
#
In a flash of light, the lava and ice of the cavern—and Jocelyn and Xanatos—were gone. The cavern was just that, a cavern. Nothing different or exciting about it.
"You did well," Diamond told Jaina, placing a hand on her shoulder.
"Yeah, yeah, she lived and all that," Obsidian said, sounding thoroughly disappointed as she rolled her yellow eyes. "Ready to get back to reality?"
"Yes. Your Master and friends are waiting for you." Diamond said. Jaina nodded.
As they walked through the maze of reflective tunnels, Obsidian spoke up.
"So… Since you never flat-out said it, what are you going to choose?" She asked. She tried to sound innocently curious, but her twinkling eyes betrayed her.
"I learned something from all this," Jaina said. "It's not about what you can be, or what others think you will be. It's what you should be, and what you want to be. What I should be, and what I want to be, is a Jedi. To fight for good, peace, and freedom."
"Some freedoms will come with a higher price," Diamond said. "If you consult the Jedi Code, you will find that to be true."
"Which is why I don't follow the Jedi Code," Jaina said. "I follow my own code: to live, to love, to protect, to serve, to live as God has ordained. And to never let the past haunt me again. I will always dwell where there is light."
"You will do well then," Diamond said, smiling. "And here is where we part ways." She said as they stopped. She pointed at another tunnel. "You will walk down that tunnel and rejoin your companions. But first, Obsidian and I want to give you something to remind you of today, to remind you that you always have a choice. That it's not one decision you make once and are done, but one you must make every day."
"You can make the easy decision," Obsidian piped up.
"Or the hard one," Diamond said. "Hold out your hand, palm up."
Jaina held out her hand and Obsidian and Diamond each took hold of it. With their free hands, they each brought down their index finger right beside each other in the middle of Jaina's palm. There was a flash of light, then, smiling brightly, Diamond and Obsidian removed their hands.
Jaina looked down at her palm and smiled. Painlessly tattooed onto her hand was a circle divided in half. The left half was a blood-red moon, the right half was a pale blue sun.
"When you go through that tunnel, you will be reunited with your friends," Diamond said. "We wish you the best of luck, that you find true love, and to know peace."
"Diamond and I will always be hanging around," Obsidian said. She put a finger to Jaina's temple. "In here. Just call us and we'll help you out."
"Thank you. But I've got to know," Jaina said. "Is this real, or is this all happening inside my head?"
"Of course this is all happening inside your head," Obsidian said with a smirk.
"But why doesn't that make it real?" Diamond asked, blinking innocently.
Jaina grinned.
"Thanks," She said.
"You're welcome. May the Force be with you," Diamond said, bowing. Then she and Obsidian turned and walked back down the path towards the cavern. They hadn't taken more than five steps before Obsidian glanced over her shoulder.
"Hey, when in doubt, remember, the Dark Side's got cookies waiting for you!" She said, a grin on her face.
"Thanks, Obsidian, I'll remember that," Jaina said, grinning in response.
Diamond grabbed Obsidian by the arm, rolling her eyes and failing to resist the urge to smile. They took another step…then they were gone.
Chuckling, Jaina walked down the tunnel Diamond had pointed to. She emerged to see the waiting faces of Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan, Jace and Denn. She felt herself swept into hugs and her hair ruffled.
"So?" Qui-Gon said.
"I succeeded," Jaina said, beaming at him. "I faced the ghosts of my past. I'm free of them, now and forever. And I received," She held up her newly marked hand. "Only what I take with me."
The grins she received in turn were not only of pride and love, but also joy.
The Jaina they knew and loved had returned.