"Lily?" Severus looked at his hands, avoiding her eyes. "What's wrong, Severus?" She heard the hesitation dripping through his voice. He was struggling with words. "You.. you know that boy, right." His eyes flickered to the table behind them. "Uhm.. yes, I do." Lily replied, her cheeks colored a little bit when she catches his stare. "I think.. I think he likes you." Lily's breath was captured in her throat by the forwardness of his words. She didn't know what to say. "You are my best friend, Lily." His eyes turned to the table again. His mouth was dry. Why was this so hard? He knew Lily liked James. He knew he was no match to him. He knew she would chose him if she had to. Why then did he made himself push her away earlier than she was going to push him away. The ache in his stomach was building. "Sorry.. I have to go." He said shortly, standing up out of his seat and walking away. This was too painful. A tear stung in the corner of his eye. "Severus, wait!" Lily came after him. Hurrying, almost running over one of the butlers.
"Severus!" Her voice sounded irritated. "Stop it right there and explain! You owe me that." Severus stopped his pace at once. "You owe me?!" Suddenly he was furious. "Were you, or were you not going to leave me moldering away in the dungeons to leave me with that stupid, selfish Potter?" Although he didn't want it, a tear rolled down his cheekbones. Why was he fighting with her? Why was he pushing her away? "What?!" Lily shouted. "How could you think that of me?" Her voice broke. "I would.. I could.. I could never do that to you." "Is everything alright?" Snape turned his head to the door, with a dead staring look in his eyes. "No! It's not! It's not alright! It's all your fault! If you weren't here, all of this would be a lot easier!" Severus looked at Lily. Hoping she would tell James to go away. Hoping she would tell him to leave and never come back. But again, he knew that wasn't going to happen. Lily opened her mouth, still looking back at him. "James.. I.. I think you'd better go." James just stared at both of them. "No. I'm not leaving you with that freak." He shot a filthy look at Severus. His eyes shot fire. Severus opened his mouth to protest but Lily was the first to speak. "I can handle this by myself, James." He raised his eyebrows questioningly, Lily nodded in return, and he left, hesitant, but he left.
"Sev.." Lily started carefully. "Are you.." She laid her hand upon his shoulder."Are you alright?" He pushed her hand away, walked towards a bench and sat down with his head lying in his hands. "No, it's not alright. It's not. You off all people should know that." "Then tell me what is wrong!" "I love you, alright?!" I love you, and I'm afraid to lose you!" Severus lost his control, tears streaming down his face, onto his knees. "Severus, I'm.. I'm so-" "No, you're not. You can't do anything about your feelings. You don't feel sorry." He took a deep breath and continued. "I think I should leave." And with those words he stood up, leaving Lily behind, standing in the pouring rain they didn't even noticed before.