Man, I need this... I must drown myself in Hayffie feels. I can't tell anyone though... I just have to clear my mind RAWR!

Effie's POV

We were left alone in the table I looked at him and he caught me staring. I think it's just my imagination but I saw a spark in his eyes; a spark of love. Maybe there's a chance for he to love me back... No, that's very unlikely. I was the embodiment of everything he hates; why on earth would he love me?

But I still begged to the heavens for this night. I just want one dance from him; something that I can savor for my entire life. I promise that it will be enough. I shall not confess my feelings; the stakes are way too high. I dare not to gamble our friendship for such an absurd possibility.

Moments later he broke away from my gaze then he turned around and walked towards the bar. I can tell from his expression and from the movement of his lips that he ordered the strongest one that they have. Is he really so abhorred by me that he would rather give in to alcohol instead of spend time with me?

Maybe Katniss was wrong. Maybe I made it too obvious. It's possible that he knows about my feelings. I'm usually good at masking my emotions so why can't I hide my feelings from him? Is it possible that I am so stupidly enamored that I can't even assess my emotions anymore?

I just lost one of my dearest friends; I was foolish enough to let my guard down.

I despised that man; I loathed his very being a couple of years ago so why do I feel like this now? Why do I love him and why am I so hurt by this? Fate certainly has a dark sense of humor.

Neither one of us danced that night. He spent the whole night drinking while I sat at our table plucking out the petals from the roses on the centerpiece. I know better than to do that of course; I know how expensive these flower arrangements are. I appreciate all of the expensive glamorous stuff here; I even scolded Katniss when she stabbed a mahogany table, yet here I am now- destroying expensive Capitol paraphernalia. What has this world come to?

I tore each petal with spite. I just have to get it all out right now and I can worry about the flowers later. I observed each one of them bleed out the red sap from the tear. They stained the white satin table cloth but I really don't care anymore.

"Effie? Are you okay?" I saw Peeta approach the table and sit next to me.

"I'm fine. Just getting a little headache from all of the excitement. Where's Katniss?" I asked. I could tell that he didn't believe me but he seemed to shrug it off.

"She's trying to get Haymitch away from the mini bar." he said. I glanced towards their direction. Haymitch slumped on one of the seats, Katniss was trying to get him away from his glass and I must say she's not doing a very good job.

"Whoa! What happened here Effie?" Peeta finally saw the wreckage that was once a beautiful flower arrangement.

"It's okay... It's not like it's mahogany or something like that..." I replied jokingly in an attempt of lightening the mood. It obviously didn't work and Peeta just gave me another concerned look.

"You're definitely not yourself today." he stated. He had a concerned look on his face but I do not plan on telling him my predicament.

I find my behavior very immature. Peeta's right I am not myself today; I'm not the pristine, well-behaved and somewhat-hedonistic Effie Trinket. I don't even know who I am now. He didn't dance with me yet- so what? The night is young and that's no excuse to destroy flowers. What a lovely arrangement that was too but I do not feel an ounce of regret. I keep telling myself that was wrong but I just don't regret it; I feel like ripping more flowers in fact.

"That's an understatement." I replied.

"Do you want to talk about it?" he asked.

What am I suppose to tell him 'Haymitch didn't dance with me so I destroyed the flowers and stained the table cloth in a fit of rage?' No, that's a bad idea. I refuse to say anything to Peeta. I'm suppose to be a role model to him and Katniss. What will he think then he hears about my rather shallow problem.

"I'm fine really, just a little tired." I lied.

"O-okay then."

We didn't converse any further. I watched Katniss and Haymitch from the distance; she was still trying to get him to stop drinking. I can't believe all of our efforts were wasted. Oh well, maybe he forgot about all of my feelings because of the alcohol. It's not bad to hope.

"Maybe I should go there and help Katniss." I said as I walked away from the table and towards the bar.

I walked towards them and gave Haymitch a stern look.

"Oh great! Come to join the party, princess?" I could tell that he was being sarcastic. When he gets drunk nothing will keep him away from his beloved liquor.

"Haymitch, stop it. I thought you promised to stop." I said.

He stood up and took a step towards me.

"You would not understand Effie..." he said with disdain in his tone. he took another step forward while I stepped back. He moved forward while I kept stepping back. I then felt my back hit the wall. I felt his hands on my shoulders and I felt his warm alcohol breath against my face.

"H-haymitch! W-what are you-" I was cut off.

He caught me by surprise as he pressed his lips against mine. He was drunk and I was still upset; I should've shoved him off me but I didn't. I closed my eyes and savored the moment. His breath stank of alcohol but it's warmth was soothing and his lips felt like heaven against mine.

AHHHH FEELS! *Ahem*

No, they are not a couple yet in this chapter. (it would be too simple if I did that)

Thank you to Savysnape7,fludernutter01,katy, Tinker178, TheGirlWhoWasOnFire21, kataragurl27, Ember, pinkish-red hearts and Hiding in the Shadow. Your reviews are much appreciated :D