Chapter 3

"Where is it? Goddammit, where is it?"

"Right here, Denmark."

"Oh."

Having remarkably made it to the supermarket unscathed, the three nations (mostly Denmark) were now having trouble locating the object of their search, coffee.

"Okay, so let's go buy it!"

"Does anyone have any money?"

"DAMMIT!"

Nordic nations are not the best at planning ahead.

"I have about… let me see… two dollars and thirty-nine cents," said Finland. "I don't think that's enough, though…"

"I have… um… eleven cents." Iceland stated. "It's six dollars, right?"

"Yep. Any luck, Denmark?"

The country in question had been frantically searching his pockets and hair (don't judge him, he could fit a porcupine in there) for loose change.

"I found… three dollars."

"Please tell me you didn't find any money in your hair."

"… Do you really want to know the answer?"

No, no one really did.

"We're still fifty cents short!" said Finland, whose mental math skills remained impressive. "So, what do we do now? Beg on street corners?"

"We could steal it!" said Denmark.

"Are you insane? We're in enough trouble with the law as it is!" said Iceland hotly.

"Most of which was your fault."

"Do you really want to go there? I've got a puffin that will peck your eyes out."

"And I've got an axe, so bring it on!"

"Guys, stop it! We're done with that!" exclaimed Finland, a bit exasperated that this was not the first time today that he was stopping these two from killing each other. "We've got bigger problems." Wow, he was starting to sound like a broken record.

"I've got another idea! Let's just look around on the floor for change!" said Denmark excitedly.

This idea was not well received, but in the end, that was what they ended up doing. And let it be known that three people running around a store and hunting for something on the floor in pajamas at nine in the morning are going to attract some funny looks.

"Mommy, why is he looking at the floor?" a little girl asked her frazzled father as she witnessed Iceland searching under the shelves.

"I don't know, sweetie, and I'm your father, not your mother." he sighed.

"But he's not even dressed!"

"Okay, did anyone find anything?" Denmark asked the group at large. "I found about three cents."

"Thirteen cents, not including multiple dust bunnies and some things that I don't want to mention." replied Iceland, shuddering.

"And I found nine cents. So we're still twenty-five cents short," said Finland. "How are we going to get the rest?"

"OH! I know, I know!" exclaimed Denmark.

"Wow, Denmark, you're really coming up with a lot of ideas today!" said Finland happily.

"Yeah, are you okay?"

"I know, right?" said Denmark, ignoring Iceland's comment. "So, does anyone want to hear my idea?"

"Enlighten us, demon Dane."

Iceland has been associating with Norway entirely too much.

"You know how people on T.V. always ask for donations for some disease? Why don't we go up to people and ask them for money for… some cause?"

"Doesn't that sound a bit dishonest?" Silly Finland. When coffee is at stake, Denmark will do anything. Not to mention Norway will be even more violent towards him if he's not hyped up on caffeine.

"Well, I'm all for it," said Iceland. "But we can't all go up to one person. It'll freak them out."

"Good idea, Ice." replied Denmark, smirking at him. "I say we elect a spokesperson."

"Okay, so who?"

"Just for the record, I do not approve of this plan anymore," grumbled Iceland, who was currently glaring at the two smiling nations in front of him. "Why did it have to be me, anyway?"

"Because you were the one who said that we shouldn't all go up to someone at once," replied Denmark, trying desperately to hide his amusement. "Plus, you're the youngest, so you'll be less intimidating."

"Are you kidding me? In what world is Finland intimidating?"

"Hey, don't bring me into this!"

After the Nordics had resolved their disagreement and blackmailed Iceland into being their spokesperson (with what information, well, It would be against their agreement if you knew), all they had to do was choose their victim.

"Um… hello, sir… are you aware of the effects of… uh… scoliosis… on today's modern society?" Iceland asked the unsuspecting young man that Finland and Denmark had picked as their victim. Denmark, meanwhile, was laughing so hard that he was afraid that he was going to rupture something behind a shelf. Finland was laughing as well, but he at least took consideration and tried to hide it.

"I'm really not interested," the man said.

"But what about all the people who are suffering? You know, all it takes is the donation of a few cents to make a difference." Iceland could be a pretty good actor when he set his mind to it. And coffee was a cause worth fighting for.

"Um… I…" the man winced. This kid was really persistent. This was like an infomercial, only he couldn't change the channel, and Iceland was really starting to make him feel guilty.

"You can help ease the suffering of millions of innocent… um… children if you donate now! This disease is fatal, by the way. And extremely painful." Iceland added as an afterthought.

"Tell you what, kid, I'll give you fifty dollars if you just leave me alone."

"Deal." Iceland mentally rejoiced. "And have a nice day."

Yay! Three chapters in three days! And this one's almost 1,000 words! (Not including the rambling AN...) Thank you to AllyMCainey for reviewing and doing a bunch of other stuff that I'm too lazy to list here! You make me happy!

On a completely unrelated note, out of all the hurricanes that I've been through, not one of them has gotten me off school! Hooray! Even though I'm probably going to lose power... oh, well...

Also, I know that scoliosis is not fatal or extremely painful (well, I know it's not fatal, but I've never had it, so I don't know how painful it is, sorry if I offended anyone), I was just stuck for a disease and thought it'd be funny.

Finally, sorry if I made Iceland seem like a little bit of a jerk in this chapter. He's irritable from caffeine withdrawal (I feel your pain, Iceland.)

Review please! Do it for the poor scoliosis-stricken children!