A/N: Okay, sports fans... here we go. Please keep your hands and arms inside the vehicle at all times.
Jasper thought when Alice got there, everything would get better. Instead, things got much, much worse.
When he woke up in pain, confused, and alone in a hospital room with a strange man who was all up in his business, all he could think was that Alice would make it better. Whatever the hell was going on, she would explain it to him.
She would explain why it wasn't her at his bedside, but the strange man with the tortured green eyes.
But now Alice was looking at him with pity.
She was changed from the woman he remembered, the woman he would have sworn he woke up beside just this morning. Her hair was longer, for one. She'd worn it in a messy pixie cut - so wild, just like her. It was just so spunky. But more than that, there was a tightness around her eyes that hadn't been there before.
"I don't understand," he muttered to the ceiling, still trying to process the news she'd softly handed down to him. "What do you mean we're not married?"
Alice looked to the doctor who nodded encouragingly. Jasper bristled. He was confused and he didn't like it. He didn't like all these people talking to him slowly, like he was a little kid who had to be made to understand how the real world worked.
Before Alice got there, he'd gotten the idea that he was missing some time. There was an accident, they said. Apparently, he'd gone and fallen off a cliff.
Funny. He couldn't remember being very fond of hiking and rock climbing and all that. Emmett - who the doctor'd said had been with him - was constantly trying to get him to get up and go. Jasper always had better things to do.
"We got divorced quite some time ago," Alice said carefully.
Jasper's thoughts were beginning to click on. His head had begun to spin when the doctor told him he appeared to be missing some time. It was perfectly understandable, the doctor said. He'd taken quite a blow to the head. Every thought in his head vacated the premises when Alice had arrived and gently explained they weren't married anymore. Now, though, they were coming back with a vengeance, too numerous to deal with.
"You said I've been unconscious for weeks," he asked the doctor who nodded. He looked at Alice. "Are my parents dead?"
Her eyes went wide with shock. "No!"
"But they aren't here," he surmised as much. He'd been alone with the stranger in the middle of the night. His parents - bossy as all get out normally - hadn't barged in here. Something wasn't adding up at all.
"No. But your sister is in the waiting room."
"Why aren't my parents here?"
Again that look. Alice, who hadn't touched him since the first relieved, thank-god-you're-finally-awake hug, squeezed his hand. "You and your parents aren't on very good terms lately."
"Why?" He knew he was getting tetchy but he couldn't help it. They were all pissing him off.
"Because... they didn't approve of you divorcing me."
Jaspers heart twisted. He was in a fair amount of pain from his other injuries, but he was sure it was his heart that ached worst. "I divorced you?"
She sighed. "Honey, it's a long story," she said tiredly.
"How long?" He swallowed hard, closing his eyes. "How much time am I missing?"
The doctor cleared his throat. "It's the fourth of September, 2012."
Jasper's eyes went wide. He felt lightheaded, his mind struggling to wrap around the idea of missing that much time.
Seven years. He was missing damn near seven years. Last he remembered, it had been just a few days after Christmas. Just a few mornings ago, to his reckoning, Alice had told him she had a late Christmas present. She was...
Jasper tried to sit up straight.
And quickly laid back down again, dizzy and in a tremendous amount of pain. The doctor lurched forward. So did Alice. They were both trying to get him to settle.
"Just breathe, Mr. Whitlock. You probably jarred something you shouldn't have. Can't be moving like that," the doctor scolded.
Jasper tried to breathe, tried to get his head to stop spinning long enough that he could formulate words.
"This will help," the doctor said, injecting something into Jasper's IV. He grimaced. "Well, we know now he can move at least that much," he said to Alice. "That's something at least."
Already Jasper was getting woozy, his thoughts blurring around the edges. He struggled to shake off the lingering pain and the lethargy long enough that he could ask a very important question.
"Alice?" he rasped.
She stroked his cheek, her expression the tender one he'd been aching to see all night. "I'm right here, Jasper."
"We were..." He struggled to take deep breaths. "Going to... have a baby."
Her eyes were teary. "Oh, Jasper. We have a little girl. Bella. She's going to be six in a week and a half."
He had a daughter. Not a baby, but a full-sized child.
It was the last thought he had before he drifted back to sleep.
~0~
Bella's weight in Edward's arms was reassuring. She yawned, readjusting her arms around his neck and snuggling against him. Her breath was hot on his throat.
Edward just held her. Cuddling was good. He could use a good cuddle.
"Daddy?" she said sleepily.
"What is it, sweetheart?"
"Don't be sad. Papa will get better now." Her eyelashes fluttered against his skin, and some of the weight around his heart lifted ever so slightly. She sounded so utterly certain. Though she'd been tearful and worried off and on through these long weeks, now she sounded serene.
If only he could have a child's faith.
"Things should be so simple," Lucy, sitting next to him, commiserated.
Edward spared her a wan smile and kissed Bella's hair, taking what comfort he could.
More minutes passed before Alice emerged from Jasper's hospital room. Alice had obviously been crying. Edward stood, Bella and all, looking at her anxiously. "What happened. Did..."
Alice put her hand up to stop his flow of paranoia. "He startled himself and the doctor had to dope him again to manage the pain. The doctor is looking him over now to make sure he hasn't hurt himself worse."
She reached for Bella and Edward transferred the sleeping little girl to her mother's arms.
Closing her eyes, Alice hugged Bella tightly. "He's missing almost seven years."
All the breath left Edward's body as he sat heavily. On some level, he'd known of course. Jasper and Alice had been divorced as long as Bella had been alive, so when he'd asked for his wife...
But this. This was much worse than he wanted to believe.
Rubbing his eyes, Edward swallowed past the painful lump in his throat. "What did you tell him?"
"That we're divorced. That his parents didn't come to see him, and that he has a daughter."
"You didn't-"
"That's a lot of information to process, Edward," she said shortly, knowing where he was going.
Edward hung his head, rubbing his hands together restlessly.
Alice sighed, readjusting Bella. "Anyway. He's going to be out for a while. Maybe we should all take the time to get a little sleep ourselves." She looked at Edward pointedly.
"I'm staying."
"He's not ready to see you," she argued, a little exasperated.
"I know that," he snapped.
Lucy put a hand on his shoulder. "Maybe it's a good idea to get a little rest in your own bed, Edward," she encouraged gently.
"I won't leave him. It doesn't matter if he doesn't remember. I'm not going to leave."
What if he did? What if he woke up and remembered and Edward wasn't there?
"Fine. I'm going home. Going to get a little more sleep," Alice declared.
"Alice," Edward called just before she left.
She stopped and turned to him. It was still a few more seconds before he could speak though. It pained him to have to ask and she knew it. "Will you be back when he wakes up?"
"Yeah. I'll be back after I drop Bella off at daycare." She sounded weary.
He hated that he needed her but figured it would be best for Jasper to have a familiar face tell him...
"Alice," he called again, his voice , like his posture, tense.
"What?"
As much as he swallowed, he could not get the lump in his throat to dissipate. He could hardly breathe around it. "If he wants to stay with you..."
Though he could never regret his precious little girl, Jasper absolutely hated that before he figured himself out, before he knew what he needed and wanted in life, he'd broken the heart of a woman he truly loved. Things were better and, for Bella's sake, they were all friends, but Edward wasn't oblivious to the fact Alice was still in love with Jasper.
Alice blew out a long breath. "We'll cross that bridge when we come to it," she said finally and walked away before he could respond.
Edward clenched his hands into fists.
Lucy rubbed his back soothingly. "My brother loves you, Edward."
He didn't respond right away. Couldn't. His throat was too tight and it was all he could do to hold back tears. He gasped a little as he failed and put a hand over his eyes, bowing his head.
Lucy pulled him into a hug.
"He doesn't even remember why he and Alice broke up." His voice was raw. "He doesn't remember me. He doesn't even remember it's okay for him to love me."
Edward hadn't let it hit him until that very moment. This wasn't even just a question of who Jasper would go home with. This went so much deeper. Seven years ago, so much of Jasper's true identity was repressed - unknown or at least unaccepted by his own psyche.
Their entire life together was shattered, Edward realized. It was in pieces scattered all over the floor.
And above everything else, Edward was a realist. He knew there was every possibility the life he shared with Jasper - the life he rather enjoyed - could be gone forever.
After all the long weeks of waiting, Edward broke down in Jasper's sister's arms and wept.
~0~
When Jasper woke up again, after the doctors had their fill of asking him questions and examining him, he was relieved when another familiar face poked his head in the door, taking the empty chair beside his bedside. "Emmett," he said, his voice scratchy to his own ears.
Emmett looked up and grinned. Again, Jasper could see the change. Like Alice wasn't a girl anymore. Emmett wasn't a boy. None of them were the same people they'd been at nineteen and twenty. Jasper had yet to look at himself in the mirror - he wasn't ready for it yet - but Alice and Emmett were definitely adults. Still, at least Emmett's grin was the same huge smile full of teeth.
"I heard you decided to join the party." Emmett's voice was booming as usual but gentle. Jasper felt the corner of his mouth turn up slightly.
"I guess," Jasper grumbled.
"Alice will be here in a minute. She's just dropping Bella off at daycare."
Jasper's heart lurched a little both because Alice was coming back and because of the mention of Bella. "What's she like?"
Emmett looked confused. "Alice?"
"No. Bella."
"Oh." Emmett's grin only widened. "She's an awesome little chick. Funny. Smart. Good people."
Jasper stared up sightlessly. "I have a daughter," he muttered. He felt overwhelmed and turned his head to the side just in time to see the strange man from earlier peer in the door. Jasper felt a jolt go through him, caught in the stormy green for a moment before the man turned away, walking out of sight again.
"That guy is still here," he muttered.
"You mean Edward?"
Jasper looked up at Emmett. "Is that his name?"
The skin around Emmett's eyes tightened. "Wow. You really don't remember him?"
"Should I?" He scoffed. "Obviously I should if he was in here in the middle of the night. Is he a friend?"
Emmett looked uncomfortable. "Yeah... I think you should wait until Alice gets here."
"Alice," he muttered, his heart aching again. "I divorced Alice." He cocked his head. "Emmett... why the hell would I divorce Alice? Especially after we had a little girl?"
"Jazz, stop pestering Emmett," a tired, somewhat bemused voice distracted them. Jasper looked up, finding Alice in the doorway. She gave him a small smile. "I'll answer your questions, okay, but you have to promise to keep calm," she said sternly.
"Think that's my cue," Emmett said, standing. He clapped Jasper on the shoulder lightly. "Hey, man. I wanted to tell you... I'm sorry for how this all went down."
Jasper shook his head slightly. "From what the doctor said, it wasn't your fault. If you hadn't gone for help when you did, I'd have been dead."
Emmett shuddered, visibly disturbed. "Yeah... I thought you were. I really thought you were," he said quietly before shaking his head and walking out the door.
Alice took his place. Jasper found he couldn't look at her. He was still confused and pissed off. He hated it.
"Okay," Alice began again. "Seven years is a long time, Jasper. A lot has happened."
"Obviously," Jasper grumbled.
"So what do you want to know first?"
A million voices shouted in his head, a million questions he wanted, needed, answered. "Can I meet Bella? What does she know? Does she live with you?"
"Whoa. One at a time, tiger." Alice looked bemused. "Of course you can see Bella. She's at daycare right now, but she wants to see you really bad." Her expression was cautious. "But maybe after you've had a little time to adjust."
Jasper just huffed. He wondered if there was any way to adjust to his life being so unrecognizable. But he understood what Alice meant. It wouldn't do for him to be so all over the place around a kid.
"She knows about the accident, of course. She visits you almost every day. And we share custody. There's no formal arrangement between us. There never has been."
"That's something at least," Jasper muttered. He should have known he and Alice were friendly enough, otherwise what was she doing there at all?
He took a deep breath, hissing because it caused him no small amount of ache to do so. "Okay..." He finally looked up at her, only to get distracted when he glimpsed the man - Edward - walk by again. His green eyes met Jasper's briefly before he looked away, walking on.
It was obvious even in that brief second he was in a tremendous amount of emotional agony.
"Okay. Who the fuck is that guy? The one with the personal space issues. Edward."
Alice took a deep breath, visibly steeling herself. "Edward is your boyfriend," she said carefully.
Jasper blinked at her, positive he'd heard wrong. When she only looked back at him with pensive eyes, he wracked his brain, trying to figure out why she would want to say something like that. He laughed, the sound raw and a little hysterical. "Oh, come on, Alice."
"Why on Earth would I lie to you about something like that?" she challenged, her voice tired.
"I'm trying to figure that out." He shifted against the pillow, his thoughts reeling. "I mean, I can tell I hurt you. Obviously I hurt you bad enough my parents won't even see..."
He sucked in a big gulp of air, his chest tightening.
His parents would probably not understand their son being with a man, let alone leaving his wife for one, if that was what had happened.
But no. It was impossible. He was in love with Alice. He loved her enough to marry her. Yeah, they were young - they'd been young - and everyone told them they were foolish to get married when they were barely 19, but...
"No," he shook his head. "I don't know what the hell you think you're pulling. You're mad at me. It's only right you think you can mess with my head, but just don't. Please. Whatever it is, you tell me the truth right now."
"That is the truth. You and Edward have been together for four years.
"Just shut up," he snarled. "I don't believe you. I don't fucking believe you!"
"For fuck's sake, Jasper. You almost died. You could have never woken up. Bella would have been without her Papa. You think after all that I'd want to fuck with you when you're here like this?" she challenged.
His throat was too tight, dry. His chest felt like it was about to cave in, and his breath was coming too quick.
"Jasper." Alice stood, her hand on his shoulder. "Come on, honey. You have to breathe."
He couldn't. He couldn't breathe at all. Nothing about this world he'd woken up to made any sense.
The machines around him started to go crazy. There were spots in his vision, a tightening in his lungs. This was a nightmare and he wanted to wake up. For real. He wanted to wake up in a world where something - anything - made sense.
The room filled up with nurses. They pushed Alice back and tried to get him to calm down. When he wouldn't - couldn't - they doped him again. A different med this time. Not pain meds like the night before, but anti-anxiety they explained.
Either way, his little fit left him exhausted, and Jasper couldn't keep his eyes open.
Just before he let sleep take him, his eyes drifted to the doorway. His sister was there - no longer the thirteen year old girl of his memories, but a grown woman. It sent another shock through his system.
And of course, the tortured, worried eyes of the stranger - Edward.
His agonized expression was the last thing Jasper saw before he let sleep take him.
A/N: Big hugs and kisses to Naeleny for beta. Thank you to jfka06 and barburella for always making my docs interesting.
Soooo... Thoughts? I think those boys need a good cuddle.