A/N: *hugs* for everyone.

Jasper had absolutely no idea what was on the television. He'd been staring at the damn thing for hours - maybe days - but if anyone had asked, he would not have been able to pull even the most basic plotline out of his head.

Or maybe he was watching the news.

Who knew.

He was vaguely aware someone was knocking on the door, but he couldn't bring himself to move. He thought about calling for Lucy but decided he really didn't care. He was spaced out.

"Thank God," he heard Lucy say. "I don't know what the hell to do with him. I'm turning over custody to you."

That got Jasper's attention. He raised his head, sitting up on the couch so he could see who Lucy was talking to. "Emmett?"

"Jesus Christ," Emmett muttered. He looked at Lucy. "You done good, kid. I'll take it from here. You take a break."

"What the hell is going on?" Jasper demanded. They were talking in code, but it was obvious they were talking about him. He wasn't sure he appreciated their tone.

Lucy didn't answer him. Instead, she went over, hugged first him, then Emmett, and left.

"She called you?" Jasper asked, disgruntled. "What the heck for? What's going on?"

"Maybe you want to tell me that." Emmett sat on the opposite end of the couch. "You look like hell, Jasper. I mean seriously. I've seen you bald, bleeding, and unconscious. You looked better then."

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

Emmett gave him a look. Rather than answer, he got up, grabbing Jasper by the arm.

"What are you doing?"

"Come on," Emmett insisted. "Get up." He put his hand under Jasper's elbow, all but hauling him to his feet.

"What the fuck, Emmett?"

"This is an intervention. You need to look at yourself. I'm not going to deal with your denial."

Jasper grumbled but let Emmett drag him into the bathroom. His friend faced him forward, forcing him to look in the mirror.

The reflection startled Jasper. He was haggard. He had a four days growth of beard on his face, a pallid complexion, and greasy, messy hair. He swallowed past the lump in his throat, bowing his head.

"Okay," Emmett said, his voice softer than usual. "Now let's try that question again. You want to tell me what's going on?"

Jasper didn't answer, he didn't know if he could. He was out of sorts.

"Edward left you," Emmett filled in.

"He didn't... leave me. We weren't..."

Emmett nodded. "Uh huh. Hold that thought." He squatted, rummaging through the cabinet. Finding what he was looking for, he set Jasper's shaver on the counter. "You. Shower. You smell. Then use this. Then... we're relocating for this conversation." When Jasper didn't move, he gave him a little shove. "That's an order, soldier."

Jasper rolled his eyes, but he nodded. "Fine."

~0~

It was a novel situation. Jasper was not unaware of the fact this was the first time - that he could remember anyway - he'd had a legal drink in a bar.

He rolled the beer bottle between both his hands. "I just... I mean, it's much easier to think without him around, without knowing every minute of every day how much I'm hurting him." He sighed. "I hate that I hurt him. What I said... it was really stupid."

"Jasper, you've known me for a long time," Emmett said with a snort. "You know I am the crowned prince of saying stupid things. Everyone does it. Usually the stupid thing is easy to forgive. Heat of the moment and all that. "

He tilted his head, looking at Jasper carefully. "Do you miss him?"

Jasper shrugged. "I guess. I mean why wouldn't I? We spent every day together - or he was around, anyway."

"Jasper. Stop the bullshit," Emmett said again. "Do you miss him? Miss him. Just yes or no."

Jasper opened his mouth only to have Emmett interrupt him again. "Yes or no. Don't think, don't rationalize. Yes or no."

"Yes," Jasper blurted, staring down at the table top. He bit the inside of his cheek. "But that's... stupid. And selfish. I wish he would come back to the house, kick me out. But he won't."

"You're babbling. You realize that, right?" Emmett pointed out.

"This is just a mess," Jasper said, his hand over his eyes. "He was-"

"Jasper," Emmett interrupted, his voice louder. "Right here, right now, I'll tell you this. At the very least... you're in like with him."

Biting the inside of his cheek, Jasper couldn't argue. He sighed. "Well, how could I not be? How could I not be... in like," he said the words scathingly, "with a man who bends over backward to make sure I have everything I need. Through this whole thing, he's never stopped... loving me, even though I gave him no reason to. Especially at first."

Emmett laughed. "Oh, man. You're much more than 'in like' with him," he muttered.

Slumping forward, Jasper buried his head in his arms. He knew it was dramatic, but the last four days had been... worse than he'd expected. "I really, really miss him."

"So what are you going to do about it?"

Jasper lifted his head, raising an eyebrow. "What exactly do you expect me to do?"

Emmett smirked. "I refuse to believe you forgot how to flirt. You're a very charismatic guy. It's just in your nature to be charming."

Sitting back in his chair, Jasper began spinning his bottle round and round. He felt self-conscious about where his thoughts went, but Emmett was a genuine kind of person. He wouldn't judge. "I don't..." He swallowed hard. "I don't know how to be with a... guy." He laughed without humor. "That's what started the whole thing, remember?"

He scrubbed his hand over his eyes. "And I don't know what to do. I am... I didn't know how wrapped up I was in Edward until he left. I don't want to find someone else to..." He looked up at Emmett furtively. "You know... have those... experiences with."

"I get the idea." Emmett looked thoughtful for a moment, cradling his own beer in his hands. "Look, I'm not going to sit here and pretend I know what you're going through. And this is the second time I've seen you do this - I know it's not easy."

"But?"

"But..." He spoke haltingly, obviously choosing his words carefully. "At the risk getting into something that is not my business... I really liked you guys as a couple. I'd never seen you that happy. I think if you have any feelings for him at all, what you can have with Edward is worth fighting for. And if you agree with that even a little bit... you're going to man up and find a way to get past whatever it is you're afraid of."

"Wow. That's blunt." Jasper was more amused than anything.

"Just remember Peter." Emmett's voice was uncharacteristically gentle. "He ran out of time to have the courage to do something. Don't let it happen to you."

~0~

Another day went by as Jasper tried to figure out just what he was supposed to do to fix the mess he found himself in. He was alone in the house when he heard a key turn in the lock. Knowing Lucy wasn't due home, he hobbled as quickly as his legs could carry him to the entryway, hoping it was Edward coming home.

It wasn't. It was Esme who poked her head in the door.

"Oh, Jasper." She put her hand to her heart, obviously startled to find him so close. "I would have knocked, but I didn't want you to have to come get the door."

Trying not to let his disappointment show, Jasper smiled at her. "It's no problem. Really. My legs don't hurt as much, they just don't work very well." He very suddenly realized he was talking to Edward's mother. Edward who had fled from his own house to hers in the middle of the night - very likely upset.

If she didn't know the details, at the very least she knew Jasper was the man who'd hurt her son. A lot.

"Um. Can I... Can I get you anything?" he offered lamely, feeling abashed and somewhat awkward.

"Oh, sweetheart. No, I'm fine." Her smile was soft, tender, as she stepped closer to him, looping her arm through his. "I just had to come to see you."

"You did?"

"Of course. Both of my boys are hurting. I'm only sorry I couldn't get away sooner." With her free hand, she cupped his cheek gently.

The motion was so very motherly, it made Jasper feel a little choked up. He cleared his throat, looking away.

"How are you, Jasper? Really?" She made a little face. "Actually, hold that thought. Come here. Come to the kitchen. We'll sit down over a proper cup of tea."

Jasper had to laugh. "Tea?"

"Oh, yes. Always tea." She grinned at him as they started to walk down the hallway. "Oh, I get to tell you this story all over again. You know, Carlisle was born in England."

"Was he?"

"Mmmhmm. For every crisis the Cullen family faces, there is tea."

"I don't even know if we have tea," Jasper muttered, trying to think if he'd ever seen it.

"You do. Trust me. Edward is a Cullen, after all."

She pushed Jasper down into one of the chairs at the kitchen table and set about getting what she needed. Sure enough, Edward had tea.

He watched her for minutes before he found the courage to talk. "How is..." Jasper swallowed hard. This was remarkably difficult to discuss with Esme. "How's Edward?"

Esme was quiet for a beat too long for Jasper to think the answer was good. When she turned away from the stove, her smile was a bit forced. "We don't have to talk about Edward, I'm-"

"Please tell me." Jasper's voice was scarcely above a whisper.

Slowly, Esme sat, putting a cup of tea in front of Jasper and cradling hers in her hands. "He's... been better," she admitted. "The last few days have not been easy for him. Of course it's not easy. He's heartbroken and scared."

Jasper felt like he couldn't breathe. He pulled his hands away from the warmth of his cup, feeling like he didn't even deserve that comfort. "Then explain this to me. Your son is hurting because of me, and you're being so nice about it."

"Oh, Jasper." Esme reached out, putting her hand over his. "This isn't your fault. None of us blame you - not even Edward."

Jasper scoffed. "He must not have told you what I did."

"He did, actually." Esme tilted her head and squeezed his hand. "What happened between you was partially his fault. Hell, it was partially my fault."

That got Jasper's attention. "Your fault?" he asked incredulously.

"Back when this all began, I encouraged him to fight for you. That wasn't fair. It was very selfish. It was what I wanted - for our family to remain intact, for Edward not to lose you. I thought I wanted it because it was what was best for you." Her smile was small and sad. "You were happy with all of us once, after all.

"But what I realized, what Edward has realized - and if I'm being honest, what Carlisle has been trying to get us both to understand all along - is that you need room to breathe." She squeezed his hand one more time before pulling back. "We can't tellyou who you are and expect you to be satisfied with that."

She took a long sip, her expression tight but her smile genuine when she put her cup back down. "One way or another, I wanted you to know... I will always think of you as my son. However you came to us, you're my granddaughter's father and a good man who has been put in a very trying situation."

Unconditional love and support.

Well, there was no doubt that Edward's compassion and generosity was a learned behavior.

"He's really not mad at me, Esme?" he asked quietly. As tangled up as he was, it was difficult to hope things weren't as bad as they felt.

And he'd been thinking about Emmett's words from a couple days previous. A lot.

She eyed him. "No. Why? What are you thinking?"

Jasper's heart sped. He debated for a long moment before he decided getting Edward's mother on board as an ally was probably a good idea. "Because I want him back," he finally admitted.

With a fantastically delighted squeal of happiness, Esme pumped both fists in the air. Jasper had to laugh, and she gave him a sheepish smile. "Sorry." She made an effort to put a more serious face on. "Absence makes the heart grow fonder?" she guessed.

"I don't think I knew what I had until I lost it."

Esme studied him for another moment. "Do you love him?"

Jasper wanted, he reallywanted, to say yes. He knew it was what she wanted to hear. But he knew better than to lie. "I don't know," he said truthfully.

"Okay," Esme said, nodding resolutely. "I'll help you."

~0~

In retrospect, Edward should have known something was going on.

His parents were pushier than usual about dragging him out of the house. He knew he was in trouble when his father started laying the guilt on thick. Carlisle told him how worried he was, how much it pained him to watch Edward mope.

So he'd agreed to go out. They were only going to one store to get a couple of items.

One store had turned into three. Edward followed his parents around listlessly, figuring it was no skin off his back. He preferred wallowing in the comforts of his own - well, his parents' - home but if it soothed them to have their grown, pouting son following them around, so be it.

They talked about going to a fourth store. Before Edward could complain, Carlisle quickly interjected that they would drop him off back home.

Part of Edward was sorry he was being so petulant, but mostly he couldn't bring himself to care.

He trudged up the steps of his parents' house without turning to wave at them.

He felt like an old, stooped man.

Before he could get his key in the lock, the door came open. Edward had to blink a few times, sure he was seeing things. No. Sure enough, Jasper was right in front of him.

And he was wearing a vest.

Edward had a soft spot for Jasper in a vest. It did pleasant things to his body.

Once he got past his stuttering surprise, Edward let Jasper lead him to the dining room. The table was set with his parents' best silver and their fanciest plates. A small feast awaited them: all Edward's favorite things including his favorite wine.

He remembered Bella whispering to Jasper some weeks before, telling him how he used to apologize.

"Okay." Edward sat down slowly across from Jasper, his stomach doing uncomfortable flip flops. "I know what you're doing, I just don't really understand why you're doing it. There's nothing you need to apologize for."

Jasper took a long drink of his wine before he tried to speak. "There's a lot I have to apologize for, not the least of which are the things I said to you."

Edward shook his head, but Jasper wouldn't let him speak.

"No. Look, I get it. You and I... I don't think either of us approached this whole situation in the best way. But let me take responsibility for my share of the mess." His expression was sincere as he leaned across the table. "I got all caught up in my own drama, but that's no excuse for being so selfish. I was only thinking of me that day, of what I needed, and that wasn't fair. So I'm sorry."

"I appreciate that," Edward said softly. "You didn't need to go through all this trouble, though."

At first, Edward thought he must be imagining it, but no. Jasper got a little pale, and Edward could tell he was gnawing on the inside of his cheek.

But he took a deep breath and looked up at Edward, his smile spreading slowly - alluring, seductive.

Edward's breath caught in his throat.

"Well," Jasper began, his tone deep. "To tell you the truth, I want much more than to just apologize."

Despite himself, Edward's heart began to speed. He wanted to close his eyes because it took so little to raise his hopes. The wound Jasper had left - the realization that Edward might have to sincerely consider he was never going to get his lover back - began to fill again, aching to be whole, mended.

He cleared his throat before he tried to speak, reminding himself to be logical, to keep his feet on the ground this time. "What else do you want?" He was proud that his voice didn't waver, didn't betray his nerves or the hope he didn't want to acknowledge.

Jasper took another breath. "Let me cut to the chase then." He was worrying his napkin between his fingers - another show of how nervous he was. "I want to... try again."

Edward's heart plummeted and soared at the same time, the emotion making his stomach twist. "Jasper," he said with a sigh, already shaking his head.

"No, hear me out," the blond man said, speaking quickly now, losing the hint of suaveness he'd started out with. "It's not as though we were incompatible, you know? Yeah, maybe we both made mistakes - I know I did - but we had a good thing going for a while... getting to know each other, taking it slow."

How much Edward wanted to agree. He looked down at the table, closing his eyes tight, remembering how much the last week had just... hurt.

He had to be honest.

"I just don't know if I could do that again. I'm not going to say it wasn't nice." He chanced a glance up and smiled, remembering the sweet kisses. "It was very nice. But... These last few days I've had a lot of time to think. I don't see how this is supposed to work."

"What exactly are you talking about?" Jasper asked slowly, his tone not betraying any emotion.

Again, Edward couldn't look at him. It was difficult to say these next words out loud. It felt like admitting defeat. "I'll always be more into you than you are with me," he said finally, unable to keep the misery out of his tone.

Jasper stood up, leaning on the table, and made his way over to Edward. He sat in the chair beside Edward, facing him. Edward wouldn't look at him. He had the most awful feeling that he would start to cry if he had to look up, and that was the last thing he wanted to do.

"I don't think that will always be true," Jasper murmured, his voice close. Edward shivered because it felt intimate, like when they laid in bed at night, whispering to each other. His body jolted when he felt Jasper's hand on his cheek. "The truth is... I'm falling for you, Edward."

Edward's head snapped up. He found Jasper's eyes on him, and knew from his expression that he meant those words. This wasn't a game. This was Jasper, his emotions raw and plainly readable.

"I'm sorry," Jasper said. "I'm so sorry it took me so long to really see what was happening. I'm sorry it took you leaving for me to realize it."

Edward couldn't say anything. His tongue was tied. He was knocked breathless. In an instant, the hope that he'd spent these last week trying to tame and lock up where it might not get out to hurt him again came bounding forward, loose and free and completely out of his control.

Holding his gaze until the very last possible moment, Jasper leaned in slowly, giving Edward the chance to protest. He kissed him very softly - the whisper of a breeze gently rustling a leaf. "I want you to come home," Jasper rumbled, his mouth so close to Edward's that the words vibrated against his lips. He kissed him again, more firmly this time. "Please come home." He pressed a kiss above Edward's mouth, below his nose. "I'm not going to promise you it will be perfect." He shook his head slightly, his lips brushing Edward's chin. "There are so many things I still don't know about myself and what I want. But I'll tell you something I've learned this past week. " He brought his other hand up so he cradled Edward's face. Slowly, Edward opened his eyes, and only then did Jasper speak again. "I've seen what my life is without you, and I know for sure I don't want that."

"Please," Jasper said, and kissed Edward's nose. "Please," he said again, kissing each of his cheeks. "Please come home." He kissed his lips and waited, lingering.

With a shuddering sigh, Edward gave in, melting forward into the kiss. He wrapped his arms around Jasper's neck.

He'd never stood a chance. He was Jasper's: heart, body, and soul. There was not a damn thing he could do to protect himself from it, and right then, Edward couldn't have cared less.

"Yes," he rumbled against Jasper's lips. "I'll come home."

A/N: Aieee! Edward's coming home.

How are we doing out there?