This one was a little tough. Chris isn't really an overly funny guy; the humor with him I think comes more from his naiveté and hopefully I captured that a little. I have to say though, that I do like the name of the chapter.

Diaz I Say, Not as I Do

Sam had just started back in on his own file when the silence was broken by Jerry's quiet musing. "Maybe McNally likes to watch."

"I'd like to watch," Dov noted excitedly.

Sam's mouth dropped open and a surprised chuckle escaped. Was he serious? He looked over to see Jerry shaking his head before he turned to a clueless Epstein who was looking back at him hopefully. Sam couldn't help but continue to laugh until the amused twinkle in his eye was replaced by an evil glint. "Sure, Epstein; you can watch…"

Dov's face lit up until…

"…about ten hours of traffic cam footage." Jerry finished for Sam as the senior officers chuckled once again.

Dov wasn't ready to just give up though. "Won't you need a judge? You know, to decide who the winner is."

"Rook's got a point," Jerry admitted.

"See you need me," Dov informed them, excitement taking over once again.

Sam pointed him back to the file on his desk. "Prove it."

"Yes, Sir," Dov agreed with a smile. "I won't let you down, Sir."

Sam shook his head and returned to his own file. It didn't take much to make Epstein happy. Sam wondered if he was getting soft because he was seriously considering letting Dov in on the interrogations.

About a half hour and not much progress later, the three men heard a commotion down the hall. Stepping out of the office they saw Chris and Traci practically dragging some guy towards booking; he looked totally out of it. Traci was covered in a substance that they were sure they really didn't want to know about and they watched as she shoved Chris and the perp into booking and then headed off towards the locker room. It took less than thirty seconds for Oliver to come rushing out the same door. He looked up to see Jerry grumbling as he handed a couple of bills to a smiling Sam.

"You do not want to go in there!" Oliver announced. "I think I may have lost my appetite!"

"Is that even possible?" Dov wondered aloud.

"You know what this means?" Jerry posed anxiously.

Dov's eyes widened. "What?"

"The predictions about 2012 were right."

Sam and Jerry snickered as Oliver wheezed out a fake one in return. "Laugh it up boys, but as my best friends, it will be up to you to revive me."

Jerry and Sam started wrestling each other both announcing at the same time. "Jer'll do it." "Sammy'll do it."

"Wow! Really feeling the love there boys," Oliver retorted sarcastically. "Somebody ring me when Diaz comes back out with him."

"Where are you going?" Sam asked worriedly; the guy had been putting up a pretty decent fight.

"What?" Oliver shrugged. "She and Diaz have it under control; the guys going to pass out again any minute anyway." Oliver flipped his head quickly to the side. "Did you hear that?"

Sam took an anxious step forward. "What?"

Oliver grinned, a real one this time. "There's a sandwich in the break room calling my name."

"You're such an ass."

Oliver chuckled and offered a wave over his shoulder. "At least it's not the end of the world."

Oliver had left Andy and Chris inside booking trying to muscle the perp over to the desk. Their noses were scrunched up in horror and they were doing their best to breathe only through their mouths. Apparently, the guy had passed out in a bar and when the smell finally reached the owner, he tried to kick the guy out and he started to get belligerent. That's when they called the cops.

After a few minutes, Chris had him propped up against the desk while Andy gingerly pulled items from his pockets. When they were finally able to get him into the cell, Andy pulled off her purple gloves and turned to Chris. "Where'd Trace go?"

Chris grimaced. "The guy threw up outside the bar, ended up mostly on himself but he tried to grab hold of Traci to hold himself up and well, she needed to change."

Andy shuddered. "Well let's get this done so we can get him out of here."

She grabbed a can of deodorizer from the desk and sprayed it around paying special attention to the part of the desk he had leaned on; at least it should help a little. When she finally sank back into her chair, Chris pulled up a seat beside her and they started on the paperwork.

"Good day?" Chris wondered trying to make small talk.

Andy shifted her eyes from the computer and looked at him doubtfully. "It's booking, and you just brought in a guy covered in barf."

Chris offered her a shy smile. "So that's a no?"

Andy shook her head. "No, it's fine. I might as well get used to it."

Even though there was no one else there but the guy in the cell, Chris' eyes shot around the room and he lowered his voice. "I still can't believe you… you know," he finished sheepishly.

"Chris!"

"Well I can't," he defended. "Seriously, Andy, you went after Swarek when he was undercover; what were you thinking?"

Andy shook her head but kept it down and trained on the screen. "I couldn't help it Chris. I just… I didn't know when I would see him again."

"You should have waited."

She finally looked up at him. "Don't you think I know that?"

He was shaking his head. "I'm surprised Gail's mom let you off that easy."

Andy scoffed loudly.

"What?"

"Gail let it slip that her mom was outvoted."

Chris chuckled. "So I guess it's not a dictatorship then."

Andy couldn't help but laugh with him. "Apparently not; either way though, we did the time and we've learned our lesson."

"So have the rest of us," Chris complained.

Andy flinched. "Yeah, I heard, sorry about that."

"It's all right; it wasn't that bad," Chris responded, ever the optimist. "The jokes were actually pretty good that week," Chris snickered. "Every time Detective Barber got anywhere near Traci, Shaw or Williams would yell out 'HANDS WHERE I CAN SEE 'EM' or 'INAPPROPRIATE'. One time they even snuck up behind them and put on a little," he squinted trying to come up with the right words, "refresher course I guess."

Andy furrowed her brow in confusion as Chris chuckled again in memory.

"Traci and Detective Barber were in a close conversation and Shaw pulled them over to the top of the stairs but wouldn't let them separate. Officer Williams stood beside Shaw and motioned at the three feet between her and him and said 'appropriate' and then Shaw motioned to the small space between Traci and Detective Barber and said 'inappropriate'. It was awesome; I don't know how many times they repeated the 'appropriate' and 'inappropriate' before Detective Barber stalked off but, yeah, he avoided Traci pretty much the rest of that day."

Andy chuckled mostly glad it wasn't her. She shrugged. "Just goes to show it's too little too late anyways."

"What do you mean?"

"Jerry and Traci…"

"You and Swarek," Chris countered before she could continue.

Andy tilted her head and quirked an eyebrow in challenge. "You and Gail."

A faint blush colored Chris' cheeks. "There's nothing going on with Gail and me." He couldn't quite meet Andy's eye though.

"Oh, my God; you still have feelings for her," Andy accused.

"I… it doesn't matter; I…"

"Does she know?"

"I don't think so and I don't think I'm going to tell her either."

"Why not?"

"I'm still not sure I trust her."

Andy could relate to that; trust was a huge thing for her, but if he still had feelings for Gail. "Maybe you owe it to yourself to find out if you can…" she shrugged, "maybe a second chance?"

"You didn't give Luke a second chance," Chris responded knowingly.

Andy narrowed her eyes. "It wasn't the same and you know it. You and Gail weren't engaged. She didn't… you know." Her eyes softened. "And I'm happier now anyway… Sam makes me happy."

"I'm glad," Chris agreed. "You know I was never really sure about you and Luke."

"I'm not sure I was either," Andy conceded.

"Well you should always follow your heart and I think yours must have known."

Andy nodded and started punching the keys again; she had a feeling Chris was right. "What about your heart? What's it telling you?"

Chris shook his head. "It's not sure. I miss her, but how do we go back?"

"Did you ever get the whole story?"

"Yeah Dov told me."

"And…"

"And I told Gail that even though nothing happened…"

Andy looked at him curiously. If nothing happened, then why…

"He kissed her… on the wrist."

She dropped her chin in surprise. "That was the kiss."

"Yes, but I'll tell you what I told her. She doesn't let people get close to her; he shouldn't have gotten close enough to even do that. She doesn't let people in; I mean do you know how long it took me…"

"Chris."

"What?"

"Dov is your best friend. You invited Gail to live with you AND your best friend. She saw him every day; how could he not get close." Andy grinned over at him, trying to lighten things up. "Besides, Dov grows on you…"

Deep down, he knew she was right. Dov was a great guy and it was only a matter of time before Gail got it; it still hurt though. "I just, well, what if…"

Andy furrowed her brow.

"What?" He responded.

"Well… you and Dov are good. And… you obviously trust him again. You forgave him."

"Yeah, well, I'm not in lo… I mean I wasn't in lo…" Chris took a deep breath. "He's my best friend and he was high so I gave him the benefit of the doubt."

"Maybe you should give her a little benefit too." Andy shrugged. "It's only fair."

Chris' shoulders hunched; he had been wondering about that lately too. "We'll see," he conceded before perking up and giving her a sideways glance. "Maybe if I go undercover…"

"Chris!" She giggled nervously startled that he had even gone there.

"What?" He grinned back at her.

"You know what," she declared shoving his elbow off the armrest. "And I wouldn't recommend it."

Chris looked at her seriously. "You wish you hadn't…"

"Oh, God no," she disputed. "I mean; I should have never. He could have been… I could have been." She took a deep breath. "Let's just say it wasn't the most ideal situation, but no, I can't regret it. I wouldn't go back and change it but I won't be doing it again anytime soon either."

"What happens if he gets called under again?"

Andy shook her head ruefully. "I have a feeling that's not going to happen, not for a while anyway."

"I thought you said no regrets."

Andy sighed. "I just don't like that his job was affected because of me."

Chris didn't like the somber tone the conversation had taken so he tried to lighten things up again. "So you and Swarek…"

Her eyes widened.

"What?" He pulled his head back quickly. "I was just going to ask if they said you could or couldn't…"

Andy wasn't sure she wanted him to finish that thought. "Frank just said we couldn't be paired together and we'd probably get the short end of the stick for awhile." She motioned around the room, "so I'm guessing this is going to become my second home."

"Did he say anything about keeping it out of the station? I mean he was pretty clear about it in the seminar." Chris stopped short for a second. "Hey… how come you guys don't have to get the talk?"

Andy chuckled quietly. "I'm thinking he's pretty sure we've learned our lesson," she responded pulling the paper out of the printer. "Besides too little too late remember."

Chris pursed his lips. "I find that hard to believe."

Andy grinned and her eyes started to twinkle. "Maybe he's just worried that Sam might call him on it."

Chris' head flipped to her in surprise. "On what?"

Andy looked at him incredulous. "Him and Noelle?"

"Him and Noelle what?" Chris asked innocently.

Andy dropped her chin and simply stared at him till he started putting two and two together.

"Are you kidding me?" His voice raised at least two octaves. "But he… and they… he was so convincing. Wait that's why?"

"That's why what?" Andy wondered.

"One day, Shaw yelled out 'inappropriate'. Everyone's eyes shot around the room, but Traci and Jerry were nowhere to be found. Sargent Best ended up yelling at him but I had no idea why." Chris huffed out a breath and shook his head.

"Well that's why. But they're pretty good about keeping it out of site so I don't think too many people know."

"Guess that's the key."

"Yeah," Andy agreed nodding.

"You think you can do it?"

"We have to. I don't think we'll get a second chance."

Chris was nodding along with her when Sam popped his head in the door. "Hey Diaz, you ready to move that guy to holding?"

Chris stood up and watched as Sam winked at Andy. "Shaw said you should go get him once you're all done there."

Chris grabbed the papers, took the guy from the cell and slipped out past Sam who was holding open the door. He looked back at Andy and smirked, tilting his head subtly towards Sam. "Good luck with that."

Thanks to SairsJ for giving this the once over.

The Final Ballot for the Rookies Choice Awards should be up in the Parade area of the forum soon. Don't forget to vote for your favorites!