A/N: Whew! This was the longest chapter yet, and perhaps the most revealing (so far). Finally made it to Sebastian's Warblers audition! I don't really have much to say. One thing on formatting is that I didn't realize strikethroughs weren't possible on this site, so I did a weerd-(crossed out)- weird thing (see what I did there?) to make that come across. Hopefully it doesn't look as dumb to you as it does to me. But again, I don't own Glee, please review, and next one's coming soon! (later today)...
Will staggered into the locker room, his face flushed. Once he reached his locker, his legs gave out, and he collapsed dramatically on the floor.
"And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how you get athlete's foot...on your face," Carter remarked still catching his breath from the sprints they just finished running. He opened his locker, and his eyes widened in shock. "Oh god, where's my water?" he exclaimed, frantically throwing the contents of his locker out in search. His shoes, afro pick and deodorant slid across the locker room floor.
Practice was particularly brutal today because the team lost their game the day before. Sebastian watched the disaster unfold, and even found himself getting frustrated at the team's performance. So because of their loss, he too had to endure the intense practice as punishment. But he enjoyed being back on the fields and was able to impress the coach enough that he secured a spot on the team.
The rest of the team stumbled in seemingly even more exhausted than the other two.
"Alright, guys," Joe announced. He was the last one entering the locker room. "I hope this will remind you all what it means to be aggressive. I saw zero hustle and little organization yesterday. What? Did y'all forget everything we've been working on all season? Jesus Christ, we were almost as bad as St. Mary's middle school girls team out there."
"Pff, almost?" Sebastian remarked under his breath.
"Really, Sebastian? We don't need that shit right now," Joe snapped.
"Sorry," Sebastian said unapologetically.
"Anyway, we have a game against the Falcons next Thursday, and we CANNOT lose. We lose this game, and we can kiss the Championship goodbye. So step it up or I swear to God you'll be losing a lot more than a trophy," he ended threateningly. He grabbed his towel and head for the showers. Joe was very passionate about the sport and in times like these, it really showed.
"Ugh, I hate how Joe's always kicking our asses while acting like he's so goddamn perfect," Carter said angrily throwing his empty water bottle across the locker room.
"I don't even know why I'm being punished," Will called from his unchanged position on the floor. "I'm just the goalie!"
"Shut up, Will," said another player.
"I'm not entirely sure who said that," Will said lifting his arm and pointing in the general direction of the voice, "but fuck you, bro."
"Seriously, guys stop complaining. If anyone should be pissed, it's me. I literally joined the team two hours ago, and I'm still being punished. How about not focusing on the consequences, but the cause. What was happening out there that made you guys lose so badly? Defense, you guys need to step it up. Yeah, that team was fast, but don't let that dishearten you. You can still keep up with them. Offense, learn to cradle the damn ball! Also, communicate! Carter, when you were passing the ball to Alex in the second half, you missed him by a freaking mile. Make sure he knows that you're passing it to him so he won't run off in the opposite direction. And Will…"
Everyone turned to Will who was quietly snoring on the ground.
Sebastian sighed, "Never mind. But, guys, you are a good team. I saw all the potential you guys have watching the game yesterday, but you got intimidated and let it all fall apart. Don't worry about the other team. You can't control what they do. You can only control what YOU do. So man the hell up and show those Falcons next week what we're made of!" The guys clapped, fist-pumped and cheered in agreement.
"Because now, you guys legitimately suck ass." The team went silent.
Each slowly began to break off and hit the showers. Will, Carter, Sebastian and a few others still remained.
"Now THAT was a captain's speech. Well, until that last part," Carter said lightly punching Sebastian's arm while attempting to kick Will awake. "So, what are you doing this weekend, man?"
"Make up work mostly," Sebastian replied grabbing his things from his locker. He was still weirded out by the casualness of the conversation. He'd made a point not to develop close friendships throughout the years, but he found himself actually liking the company of a few of the lacrosse guys. "And figuring out my audition piece for the Warbler tryouts."
"You're auditioning?" exclaimed Joe from his shower. He quickly emerged smiling with wet blond hair and a towel around his waist. Sebastian couldn't help but give him the once-over.
"What are you going to audition with?" he asked excitedly.
"I don't know yet, hence the 'figuring out' part of my last statement."
"Henth de figu-ing out paart," Joe repeated, playfully mocking Sebastian. "But you should totally sing Katy Perry! Those Warbler guys are obsessed with her."
"Uh, not my style."
"Maybe like rock, then? You know, some AC/DC?"
"How about Nickelback? Everyone loves Nickelback," suggested another player.
"Justin Timberlake?" "Deadmau5?" "Elton John?" "The Fray?" "Elvis?"
"I got it!" yelled Will finally pulling himself up from the floor. "You should sing…wait for it…Call Me Maybe!" He had a proud look on his face and awaited the team's praise of his genius.
"So anyway…" Sebastian continued, everyone completely ignored Will's outburst. Will, upset, grabbed his towel and stormed toward the showers. The guys laughed and continued making suggestions.
"Hey, I have an idea. Do you play the piano?" Carter asked.
"Are you kidding me?" Sebastian scoffed as if the mere question was offensive.
"A simple 'yes' would have sufficed. But anyway, you could do like a piano-y version of a Drake song. I heard someone do a ballad cover of Best I Ever Had on Youtube. It was kind of unexpected, but it was pretty awesome."
Sebastian thought for a while. "Never heard of him."
"Wow," Carter looked surprised. "So you've been living under a rock, then."
"Under a rock. Or, you know, Paris…"
"Well apparently they're not so different if you've never heard of Drake."
Sebastian sighed getting irritated. "Well, you guys have been oh so helpful," he sneered, sarcasm obvious in his tone. He slammed his locker. "I'm out of here." Sebastian grabbed his bag and clothes and stormed out of the room.
"Good luck singing songs about croissants or whatever French people listen to! I'm sure the Warblers will love it!" Carter called after him, clearly amused by Sebastian's anger.
Sebastian went through the school parking lot still pissed about Carter's comment.
So I don't like listening to the mainstream trash that's on the radio. Sorry I actually have taste.
After a couple of minutes of wandering, Sebastian finally made it to the car. He plopped into the back seat and looked up to see the same driver that picked him up from the airport.
The drive back to the house was quiet since the driver quickly learned that Sebastian wasn't fond of small talk. But when they reached the driveway, Sebastian noticed a silver Mercedes parked in one of the three garages.
Whose is that? Sebastian wondered. When he entered the house, Sebastian immediately spotted a note on the side table in the foyer. It was addressed to him and was written messily in his father's hurried script:
Sebastian,
Here are keys to your new car. So I don't have to-(crossed out)- Because public transportation here is-(crossed out)- So you can have the freedom to drive yourself to and from where you need to go. Don't worry about your license. I had it taken care of. Had to use an old picture because it was the only one I had. Try to drive safely.
William-(crossed out)-
Dad
P.S. I got it in silver because I remembered you only playing with silver Hotwheels. So...yeah.
Sebastian smiled at the letter. He saw the keys and license beside it, grabbed them and headed to the couch to read it over a couple more times. He folded it neatly and put it in his pocket. He looked around the house. He was alone. Again. Daniela didn't work on Fridays, and his father was most likely caught up at work. As a state's attorney, that was the norm.
After a few minutes of aimless daydreaming, Sebastian realized that he hadn't explored most of the downstairs rooms. Daniela only gave him the second floor tour, and he had been too busy to go anywhere but the kitchen and his own room. Sebastian got up from the couch and rounded the corner to see a long hallway. Opening each door he passed, he peered into his father's extensive library, a large media room, a few empty closets, an unused guest bathroom, and a dining room with seating for ten.
As Sebastian peaked into each of these rooms, he continued to get some feeling from them that he couldn't quite describe. It was a similar vibe he felt when he first arrived at the house. It wasn't until he found the sunroom that he finally understood what it was.
Loneliness.
The house was too big. Perhaps even large for a family of five, but for the past four years, his father had lived in it alone. The guest bathroom was never used. The nine other chairs in the dining table never sat in.
In the sunroom, the walls were covered in windows. There were light wood floors (a distinct change from the dark wood that was everywhere else in the house). The room was lit up by dazzling rays of light during the day, but was completely empty save for a grand piano.
Sebastian sat down and pressed a couple of keys. He smiled. Who knew his Dad would have a room like this? A room so simple, but so beautiful kept away, hidden from the eyes of anyone. Sebastian had always seen his dad as a dark, stoic figure, but he was slowly realizing that he had a different side. Every time Sebastian made up his mind about him, his father did something completely unexpected.
Unexpected, Sebastian thought. He looked back at the piano keys then through the windows and watched as the sun began to set.
"…let me see that tho-o-ong…" ended one of the auditioners before him.
"Thank you, um Thomas, for your…interesting performance. Results will come out on Wednesday, so we'll contact you by phone then," Sebastian heard the voice of David say as the door was opened. A short, stocky guy emerged from the Warbler's meeting room with a smile on his face.
"Nailed it," he said loud enough for Sebastian and the other guys waiting outside the room to hear. He wore a smug grin as he left the hall. The other guys began to get nervous, but Sebastian was resilient. The door opened.
"Sebastian Smythe, get ready," a voice called out. Sebastian got up and stood next to the door waiting, but when the person went to close the door, he accidentally left it slightly ajar. The Warblers were discussing Sebastian, and he could hear everything.
"Sebastian Smythe. That's the new guy, right?" asked David.
"Yeah, he's cool," Sebastian heard a familiar voice say. He smiled. It was Nick. "And he has performing experience, too. I think he'll actually be a serious contender."
"Well I think he's an asshole." Sebastian's smile quickly faded.
Jeff, he frowned.
"Even on his first day, he was so arrogant. I don't think an attitude like his will work well with the group. We are all about unity and teamwork, and I bet you he'd mess up the harmony we've all established."
"And you got that all from ONE interaction?" Nick questioned.
"How about before we judge his character, we see his audition, okay?" David interrupted.
"Agreed," said another voice.
"Good," said Nick.
"Whatever," said an obviously pissed off Jeff.
Sebastian heard footsteps coming towards the door. It was pushed open, and a guy popped his head out and summoned Sebastian into the room. Sebastian took a deep breath and followed him. Inside he saw five guys: a grinning Nick, a frowning Jeff with folded arms, the large beatboxer named John who donned a bored stare, David with a pleasant smile and Thad, the guy who led him into the room.
But Sebastian couldn't help but glare at Jeff. He knew they didn't really like each other, but not to the point that he would try to sabotage his audition.
"Sebastian Smythe?" David asked smiling.
"Who else," he said not taking his piercing eyes off of Jeff.
Jeff smiled. Sebastian was confirming everything he warned the guys about.
"Oookay," David said slightly surprised writing something down. "Well the piano is right over there if you need it."
Sebastian finally broke his stare with Jeff. No, don't let this douchebag get into your head.
He walked over to the piano and sat on the bench. He worked too hard on this piece to have it messed up. He placed his hands on the keys but then turned his head around to face the Warblers.
"Enjoy," he smirked. He turned back and began playing. He closed his eyes and tried to feel the lyrics as he sang.
I know you've been hurt by someone else
I can tell by the way you carry yourself
Nick couldn't help but smile. At just the first two lines, he could tell that Sebastian was amazing. He peered at the other four "judges" to gauge their reactions. He looked back at Sebastian but saw a person much different than the guy in his French class...
If you let me, here's what I'll do
I'll take care of you
I'll take care of you
Although he tried to focus on his performance, Sebastian's mind wandered off to thoughts of his mother. They never got along even back when they still lived in California before the divorce because, like his father, she was always working. But in Paris, it seemed like even when she did have time, she didn't care to look after him. After stressful days at school, arguments with his stepdad and coming home with mysterious bruises and injuries, he would always look to his mom. Looked for some sort of compassion, empathy or any kind of attention. But he never got it...
I've asked about you and they've told me things
but my mind didn't change
no I still the feel the same
what's a life with no fun, please
don't be so ashamed
I've had mine, you've had yours
we both know
Without that attention, Sebastian was forced to grow up faster than most kids his age. He found himself going places and doing things he shouldn't have. Alcohol was the first thing he tried. And drugs and sex quickly followed...
They don't get you like I will
my only wish is I die real
cause that truth hurts, and those lies heal
and you can't sleep thinking that he lies still
so you cry still, tears on the pillow case
big girls all get a little taste
pushing me away so I give her space
dealing with a heart that I didn't break
The rest of the Warblers slowly started to become engrossed in the performance. The passion coming through his voice was overwhelming. This wasn't just a song he was singing. It was a sort of release. A release of all the feelings and emotions he constantly tries to hide and ignore...
I'll be there for you, I will care for you
I keep thinking you, just don't know
try to run from that, say you're done with that
on your face, it just don't show.
When you're ready, just say you're ready
when all the baggage just ain't as heavy
and the parties over, just don't forget me
we'll change the pace and we'll just go slow
The lyrics seemed to be speaking directly to Sebastian. It was a message from himself. I don't need anyone. No one else matters. He has always had to take care of himself and will always continue to. All of the things he's had to face, all the things he's had to endure has made him stronger. But not strong enough. But he can't show that. He can't show that to anyone because weakness makes him vulnerable...
You won't ever have to worry,
you won't ever have to hide,
you've seen all my mistakes,
so look me in my eyes.
He is the only person who won't judge his past...
And if you let me, here's what I'll do
I'll take care of you
I'll take care of you
He has always had to take care of himself. And he always will...
I know you've been hurt by someone else
I can tell by the way you carry yourself
But what if, one day...maybe he finds someone else who will?
If you let me, here's what I'll do
I'll take care of you
I'll take care of you
Sebastian took a deep breath and quickly wiped his eyes. It wasn't until the end of the song that he realized he had been crying. Without even acknowledging the Warblers, Sebastian got up from the piano and left the room.
The room was silent.
"Well," David said, after a few minutes. "I guess we found our new Warbler."