This is just a little thing to hold you guys over. I'm having a bit of a block on both of my multi-chapter stories right now, and this is all I could get out. Just Ellie's somewhat unhinged mind and Alice thinking about stuff.
Chapter 4: Shaking
Ellie/Bella
I don't think my knees stopped shaking until I practically fell against the front door of the house. I clenched my fists hard enough for my nails to leave marks in my palms. I slid to the floor, putting my head to my knees and working on my breathing for what felt like the thousandth time today.
It was even worse than I imagined, which was saying something. I could still feel it all; the fear, the vulnerability, the insecurity that had been raging in me all throughout this damnable day.
So many people, Fear whimpered softly. That was too close.
Maybe not. That was Optimism, an emotion that rarely manifested itself anymore. This isn't Phoenix. There's what, like 2,000 people in this whole place? None that know us, none that know what happened. And none that ever will, right? What's there to be worried about?
Oh gee, I don't know, maybe the fact that it's us against 2 bloody thousand! Ah, there was Anger. I wondered when my other Emotions would make their appearance. You're right on one thing. They don't know us. And we don't know them. We have no idea what they're capable of or what they want! So, given the choice between being careful and being foolish, I'm going with CAREFUL!
But think about it. If they mess with us, all we have to do is tell Charlie. He is the Authority here. People respect him. They fear him. They wouldn't do anything to make him mad, let alone as mad as he'd been if we were hurt.
Anger went off to sulk, I think, leaving Optimism to also depart, leaving only Fear behind.
I don't want to be hurt again, the voice whispered, and before I knew it, those very words crossed my lips.
"I don't want to be hurt again."
Alice
"I don't want to be hurt again." Bella whispers, holding herself in a little ball against her front door.
This was all I got from the micro-vision before I returned to the inside of Edward's Volvo. No one but Edward and my Jazzy noticed, for which I was grateful. Edward looked troubled, but quickly shook it off, and Jasper squeezed my hand.
I occupied myself with delving into this little tidbit of a vision. It bothered me, but it wasn't the only one about Bella that did. I was having Bella/Rose visions at least three times a day now. Most of them were good, or at least non-hostile, but some, like these, were troubling. How were you hurt, Bella? And does it explain the things I've seen: your… reluctance, your fear?
I looked back at my other visions, skipping over the ones that would obviously happen after the happily ever after to focus on the more imminent ones. Yes, there was a trend there. A worrisome one, but not so that I would tell anyone beyond Edward. Not even him if it was possible, but oh the joys of having a mind-reading brother.
What was she so afraid of? I made a note to check her records when I got home to find out. I hoped I wouldn't find anything excessively horrific.