This might offend those easily offended when it comes to religion. If that's the case, please don't read for your sake as much as mine. I apologise in advance.

Title: Faith Lost
Author: tromana
Rating: T
Characters: Lisbon
Spoilers: None
Summary: Every day, Lisbon goes to sleep with less faith than she started.
Disclaimer: I do not own the Mentalist. Sorry.
Notes: PhoenixWytch's prompts 012: silver cross.

Faith Lost

It is the first thing she puts on in the morning and the last thing she takes off at night. No one questions her wearing it these days but sometimes Lisbon wished they did. Her silver cross was far from ostentatious, in fact it could be described as the complete opposite. It was the last piece of jewellery she had been given by her mother, and the only thing she had left from her at all.

She began doubting her belief the day her mother died. She had done nothing wrong and hadn't deserved to be killed by a drunk driver. Her indoctrination had lead her to believe that the good were praised, the evil punished. So, to see the woman who had brought her up lying on her deathbed whilst her father explained how they were going to switch off the life-support had given the eight year old Teresa some serious moral questioning to do.

Her father's subsequent alcoholism hadn't helped, nor had her brother going completely off the rails. She had scraped together every last cent she could to be able to force herself through college. And still she believed. Believed there was a reason for righteousness, that there was some divine spirit whom she could turn to in times of trouble. Yet the cracks were there, and she knew it wouldn't require much to destroy it beyond recognition.

She soon found out that her dream job never helped. There were times it nearly destroyed her faith in humanity as well as religion. How people could commit such heinous acts would always baffle her. The presence of such wrong-doing in a place that was meant to be so much more than it was always left her wondering. Every day, she had gone to sleep with a little less faith than she had started out with. She could picture her mother's disappointment, if she'd ever known that this was how her only daughter would turn out like.

Teresa Lisbon cannot pinpoint the moment she had completely lost faith. She still wore the cross around her neck out of principle, though.

end