I'm sick. :(

Yes, my throat is on fire, but I don't need my throat to use my fingers so HA HA! Back to writing fanfiction. :) Oh, and there's been a blizzard roaring outside my house for the past two days. And because of the 'Emergency Conditions', all the roads are closed. So it seems as if I'm not going anywhere.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything of AiW (sadly). Lewis Carroll, Disney, and Tim Burton do.

Inspirational Song: "Christmas Shoes" -Newsong (Okay so I didn't listen to this song while writing because it would have made this chapter very depressing, but it's still a very influential song.)

Thackery finally woke up.

When he finally came to, he was clueless as to how such a festive and jovial mood turned to such a sour and distressed one. Mallymkun pulled him aside and filled him in on what he had missed.

Chessur had disappeared the moment Hamish did, vanishing to who knows where to do who knows what.

Alice felt like a woman left all alone to clean up her own party. They were all a mess, covered in cake and teas, and were quietly doing their own things. Hatter had shut off his record player a while ago, after Hamish had left. The atmosphere was tense, no one knew what the next move was or when it was to be played.

Alice turned to Hatter, who was staring down at his tea with a blank look on his face and his arms resting on the table. How were they all supposed to act, anyhow? Sad that Hamish popped up? Angry that he was so vile? Confused as to what to do now? To tell the truth, Alice felt all three.

"Hatter," she whispered. He didn't seem to hear her. "Hatter," she said again. This time, he blinked and looked up at her. He gave her a shy, little, gap-toothed smile.

"I have to leave, Hatter." His eyes widened and turned amber. He stood up and took a deep breath, as if preparing to yell. His hands were shaking. Alice quickly shot up and put her hands on his shoulders. "Wait! Only to Marmoreal! I'm only going to Marmoreal!"

Hatter blinked hard and tried to retain his Madness. Finally feeling in control again, he opened his green eyes and let out a mouthful of air. "Oh," he breathed. "Well, you should've started with that," he chuckled. "Why do you need to go back to Marmoreal? We were just there this morning. I'm sure Queen Mirana can wait a little bit longer for another visit."

Alice removed her hands from his shoulders. "Well, don't you think she'd find the fact that someone from the Otherworld is simply wandering about Wonderland a bit interesting?"

Realization flashed in his eyes. "Oh. . . right! Well, we should probably get on our way, then! If we leave now, we can make it just before nightfall. . . " Alice's look silenced and confused him. "Alice?"

She squirmed under his gaze. How would he take the idea? "I have to go alone, Hatter. . . " He narrowed his eyes, but she continued. "I want you, Mally, and Thackery to go out and look for Hamish. I know he's stubborn and foolish and actually quite cruel, but he's also very clumsy. Like Mallymkun said before, very bad things can happen to creatures in these lands. Things that even Hamish doesn't deserve." She finished with what was hopefully a persuasive smile.

Hatter looked hard at her for a moment. Then he sighed and shook his hand. "Ah' daennae want you goin' alone, laddie," he lisped. "Yae've got to bae safe."

"And why wouldn't I be safe?"

"Look around yae. What do yae notice?"

Confused, but curious (as always), Alice looked around. At first, she didn't notice it. She just saw the grass and the trees surrounding them. Then she realized what was different. The trees stood straighter, almost as stiff as a board. Their colors were duller, too. She didn't hear any birds chirping. There wasn't even the rustle of wind. Everything was eerily quiet. It seemed as if Wonderland was holding its breath, like it was expecting something.

Hatter nodded. "She knows somethin' bad's 'bout to happen," he said, looking at the trees before turning to the quiet Alice. "That's why Ah' don't want yae to go off alone. Yae only just got back, Alice. Ah' don't want yae to put yaerself in danger again." His eyes turned blue.

She put her hand on his cheek, caringly stroking it. His eyes deepened. "I'll be fine, Hatter. I promise." She stood up straight and smiled proudly. "After all, I am the Champion of Underland, am I not?" she teased. She pulled back her hand and placed it on her hip.

Hatter grinned with green eyes. "That you are." His grin fell to a more serious look. "So. . . you will be careful, won't you?"

She nodded slowly.

"Then. . . fine. Mallymkun, Thackery, and I will leave once you're out of sight. Promise." He smiled.

"Thank you," she said. Alice turned and strode toward Bandy, who was resting against a large boulder (although compared to the Bandersnatch, it didn't look too large, really). She whistled and his head shot up, tongue hanging out of one side of his mouth. She slid one leg over his back and hopped up all the way with the other. Then, she looked at her friends.

Chessur was still nowhere to be seen, but Mallymkun and the March Hare were sitting on the ground, watching her with confused looks on their faces. Hatter was leaning against the table with his arms at his sides. She sighed dreamily. He really was handsome with that unruly hair, those strong muscles, his gap-toothed smile that no one else could wear, his well-built stature. . .

That's your friend, Alice! Get your head on straight!

Hatter waved at her and smiled faintly in the sunlight as the Bandersnatch stood up and leaned back.

Err. . . as straight as it can be at this moment!

Without further a due, the Bandersnatch leaped through the trees as Alice gripped his hair tight, readying herself for another adventure.

xX- HAMISH'S POV - Xx

Stupid, careless, irresponsible girl. . .

"You'd think that even Alice could tell the difference between a reality and a dream!" Quickly, Hamish Ascot looked around to see if anyone had heard him. Of course, no one had. What sensible person, besides himself, would travel through these bare wastelands without an imperative purpose? Sure, there was a dead shrub or two per mile, but besides that, he was walking in a no-man's land.

The man had never been so hungry in his life! He tried to persuade himself that every aching step brought him closer and closer to food, but he knew that was a lie. The only place he'd be going at this rate would be six feet under.

Hamish groaned. "" You're going to get lost if you go all on your lonesome," she says. "I don't need help from you," he says. . . stupidly. All I want at this point is to wake the hell up!" He dropped to his knees, exhausted. His loafers were worn, his dress shirt was ripped and torn, and his pants were soiled. "All. . . I want. . . is some damned food and to wake up!" Hamish fell to the ground laying on his side, whimpering. (The thought that you can't be hungry in dreams appeared to have never occurred to him.) "I just want. . . to get out. . . of this shithole. . . "

"Did you say 'Alice'?"

Hamish screamed, but quickly tried to cover it up with a manly cough. The voice came from a woman and he looked up from his spot on the ground to see the strangest female he had ever laid his eyes on.

She was a short and thin little thing, or at least he thought so. Her body might've seemed small because it contrasted so much with the size of her head. It was enormous! Her red hair looked like she had tried to do something with it, but gave up on it. The bodice was faded and none too fancy. Her face was concealed with a mask of makeup. From his point of view, Hamish could easily see her tapping her worn shoe impatiently. "Well? Did you not mention an 'Alice' before you started wailing and complaining and blah, blah, blah. . . ?"

Hamish sat up, putting his weight on his knees. He was preparing to retort with a terrible-some comeback when he noticed the swordsman chained to her by wrists. He was tall, had greasy black hair, an eye patch, dark armor, and a dangerous and lethal-looking sword. Another freakshow. The intimidating man noticed Hamish staring and grunted. "She asked you a question, mutt." He smacked him lightly on the arm with the butt of his unsheathed sword.

"Ow," he muttered. He rubbed his arm.

"So he speaks," the woman growled. "Now," she leaned in, very close to his face. "Is Alice back in Underland? Is that what you implied?"

Her breathe was hot and musty. He quickly said, "Underland? Is that what you call this dreadful place?"

SLAP!

Hamish's cheek stung and he looked back at the crazy woman. "Are you mad?" he shouted.

"Everyone here is," she stated. The woman raised an eyebrow and held her hand up, preparing for another strike. "Has Alice come back to Underland or not?"

Hamish panicked. "Yes! If this is your so-called Underland, then Alice is indeed in Underland!" Don't hurt me Don't hurt me Don't hurt me. . .

The madwoman dropped her hand to her side, mouth hanging wide open long enough for flies to settle in. The man behind her took less time to react. He stepped forward with his hand ready on his sword. "What's your name? Who are you?"

"My name is Lord Hamish Ascot, and I would appreciate it greatly if you would identify yourselves." The giant man glowered at him. "Please," he added.

"Well, there's no harm in that, is there Stayne?" She grinned suspiciously at him, then looked back at Hamish. "That's Stayne, my Knave."

The men both nodded at each other.

"I'm Iracabeth, owner of the Red Crown, making me the Red Queen." She frowned. "I was a powerful and respected queen until my rebellious little sister took the crown from me, with the aid of that rangy Alice, of course. . ."

Hamish was slowly standing up, but nearly fell over again at her words. "Did you say 'Alice'?" he choked out.

She nodded, looking at the ground. "Yes, yes. . . Alice was my sister's Champion. . . My sister is known as the White Queen. When Alice came, she knowingly took my evil sister's side to steal the Royal Crown from me. I never suspected that such pure malice could come from such an innocent-seeming girl." She shook her head sadly. "Very unfair is what it all was. Alice and my sister, Mirana, cheated in the game deciding who gets the Crown. Once they had won, Stayne and I were sent out here to die. Luckily, they underestimated our survival skills, but still. . . it hurts," she sniffled.

Hamish couldn't believe his ears. Unusual? Yes. Irresponsible? Yes. But evil? Was Alice actually evil? He couldn't see it; it just didn't fit right. But then he looked at the pair of people who stood in front of him. They were filthy, starving, and surely emotionally distraught.

Ghastly evidence of what was Alice's fault.

Looks like Little-Miss-Innocent-And-Beautiful-And-Kind-And-Unique wasn't so. . . innocent and kind. She was still beautiful and unique, though, he had to give her that.

But to take the side of evil and badness? Even Hamish wouldn't do that. Sure, he was a load of nasty things, but surely not evil. And if he wasn't evil, how could Alice be?

The answer stood before him.

He would be better than her.

He placed his hand on Iracabeth's arm and she flinched. "Iracabeth," he said. She looked up at him with watery eyes. "I want to help you." She smiled at his words. "The thing is, I'm quite starving over here and I don't know how much longer I can take this God-awful heat. How could you have possibly survived out here?"
Iracabeth grinned and turned sideways. "See that tree, all the way over there?" She pointed and Hamish had to squint, but he did finally notice a scrawny tree out in the distance. He nodded and she continued. "There's a latch on the ground beneath it that leads to our little safe house. It's stocked with meals and beverages up to the brim. It's our home now." She frowned. "Not much compared to the castle we used to live in. . . "

Hamish stepped forward. "How can I help?"

The queen grinned and held up her left wrist with the shackles on it. She was connected to Stayne through those chains. "For some reason, we are not allowed to break these chains. We've used glass, swords, rocks, flames, even acids, but nothing works," she nodded towards Stayne. "You tell him."

Stayne looked down at Hamish. "I believe that these shackles are enchanted so that the people who are essentially chained up can't release themselves in any way possible. I imagine that if you were to try to free us, it would work." He threw his sword up into the air and caught it by the blade with the same hand. He handed it to Hamish, who apprehensively grasped it by the handle. Unwieldy, he thrust the sword down on the chains connecting the two.

They jumped back as the shackles shattered to pieces.

Slowly, they both grinned at each other.

"Spectacular," the Knave murmured, gazing at his bare wrist in wonder.

"Excellent!" Iracabeth clapped. "Oh come, let's discuss our plan! I'm so excited now!"

"Our plan?" Hamish asked.

"Well, of course," Iracabeth breathed excitedly. "Now that Stayne and I are released, we are free to kill the White Queen and any of her subjects that don't sit well with me taking back the Crown," she said matter-of-factly. "At some point, we'll have to tear down that hideous castle of hers. . . no color in it whatsoever."

Hamish took a step back. "Kill the White-?" He shook his head. He had almost forgotten that none of this was real! He was still in the damned reverie! "Never mind."

Iracabeth looked him hard in the eyes. "Don't feel pity for that woman, Hamish. She is wretched. All you need to survive lies with us." She smiled and spread her arms wide, as if she could show how much she trusted Stayne and him with an invisible circle of friendship.

Hamish nodded and swallowed down his worries. Even if she can't be trusted, it's not like any of this is real, anyhow. "Great, but. . ." One worry would not cease to settle with him. "What will be done with Alice?"

The queen and Stayne laughed.

Iracabeth smiled sweetly at him. "Oh, you can kill Alice yourself if you'd like. I don't try to dirty my hands personally." Before Hamish could close his gaping mouth, Iracabeth and Stayne had turned around and started walking towards the safe house under the tree.

Stayne turned around and called to him, "Coming, Hamish? You look a bit hungry."

Hamish had to take big strides in order to keep up with his new friends. Or should he call them by what they really were?

Accomplices.

Oh, dang. Dramatic? Intense? Boring and horribly-written? Let me know in a Review. :)