Title: Past and Present
Rating: T
Characters: Jane/Lisbon, Van Pelt
Notes: Future/AU fic. Written for the LJ dailyfics challenge. Day 3. Prompt: chain
Past and Present
She hates that damn wedding band.
It's irrational, but it is a symbol of his past life, past love. One that can only threaten them in the form of memories. It means that she hates a ghost and she knows it. But really, she cannot be certain that he can love two women at once, he hasn't got two hearts after all. That would be akin to something out of science fiction and fantasy. But he does say that he loves her, frequently. And it's her who he travels to work with, her apartment that he moved into just six months ago (really, it had always been too big for just the one person) and her name he cries out when they make love. Patrick doesn't seem to think of the past any more, but that doesn't stop Teresa from having those little doubtful thoughts nagging away at the back of her mind. Like they always have done and always will.
Whenever his fingers entwine around hers, she has always become horribly aware of the cool metal band around his ring finger. It presses against her skin, almost like it is digging in and burning her. Like it wants to hurt her. Which it can't, because regardless of what it symbolises, it is still merely an inanimate object. When he pulls away at work to take refuge on his couch, she can still feel it catch on her skin, like it is attempting to leave its mark and make sure she is still thinking, worrying about it as she checks her e-mails in her private office. They have a new case and she still can't get a small piece of metal off of her mind.
He asks her at the scene of a crime, just states it so matter-of-factly that he might as well have been asking if she was thirsty. A body has been hacked to pieces and they are discovering it bit by bit, spread all over Los Angeles. While nobody can deny that Patrick is a romantic man, they rarely have time for romance itself. They have just slipped into each other's lives, inexplicably, unexpectedly and just feel comfortable now. The question takes her by surprise; it is Grace Van Pelt who reacts first, raising her hands to her mouth, accompanied with a gentle gasp, followed by a breathy 'oh my God'. Lisbon (for she can't be Teresa at work, she has to keep some semblance of control and professional boundary, even if she is dating a co-worker) looks at him quizzically. She never expected him to ask the question and had accepted that she wouldn't ever be his wife a long time ago.
She can't give him an answer, not straight away. The question was so unexpected and it didn't help that she just wasn't in the right frame of mind to formulate an answer. She has a case to be thinking about and justice for a murdered man, the idea of developments in her personal life just don't come into it yet. Lisbon feels terribly guilty; not only does Jane look broken hearted, but Van Pelt does too. In a second, the younger woman had probably already started thinking about engagement parties and plans to drag her boss (and friend) out shopping for wedding dresses.
Later, Patrick enjoys the apologetic kisses and her hands running over his body, over now-familiar territory. Her willingness to share gentle touches is a far cry from what it was when he first met her, even from when they first started dating. The first time they shared a simple hug, she had been so bemused that he found it amusing. Teresa has an answer now, rather than simply blinking owlishly and stalking off and he has a ring. Carefully, he slips it onto her finger, it's just the right fit and suits her perfectly, but his heart still skips a beat. Would his first wife truly mind the fact that he was moving on (that he was replacing her?) now that Red John was firmly behind bars?
As his fingers dance around hers and they resume kissing, she notices that for the first time since she has known him, that the horrible piece of gold is gone. She quickly finds out that the first wedding band is on a chain now. She doesn't ask him to stop wearing it and she won't. Patrick is taking baby steps; at least the ring is out of sight now and has stopped visually taunting her. He has already decided that he doesn't need to wear the chain all the time now and there are times when he definitely won't be wearing it.
Maybe when a wedding band, one that matches one on his finger, joins her engagement ring, he will have the desire and the confidence, to leave it in the drawer beside the bed for good.
end