Thanks to Anonymous Playing With Fire, XSpiritwingX, Iceshadow911247, and Badgerclaw of ThunderClan with a truly inspiring and kind review! It means so much to me, in that moment of anticipation before the screen clears and I can see I got way more reviews than I thought I would! Bits of this chapter were from a while ago. Note: I've never been in love so I can't say all descriptions are accurate! Again it's not done.

Chapter 29, Love is Forever

Petalstar's amber gaze fell to the brown tabby body before her. Water still soaked it, despite the careful grooming. Memories rushed over her, and ShadowClan camp disappeared.

The lively brown kit was in the river, amber eyes sparkling. Cats near the shore stood helpless, watching. There had been a flood the day before, and the stream had swollen and become a river. Briarkit was on the other side of the water, shiny sunlit drops of water flying all over her. But her eyes were so happy. She was so, so, happy. She had been so brave.

There was a bulrush she was clinging to, enjoying the tug of the insistent water against her fur. Briarkit laughed.
Petalstar had quietly slipped down towards the willow tree which was underwater. She launched herself forward, then clung to the creased bark of the willow.

She remembered grabbing the kit by her scruff and swimming back across the river, Briarkit slightly squirming.

Other memories flashed past her. Briarkit, becoming an apprentice. She had thought, for the rushing river you bested, and for the rush you clung to, your name will be Briarrush, and for your bravery. You will be remembered. She tried to stop the flow of memories - Briarpaw dutifully gathering bedding for the elders in a sunny, hot afternoon; becoming a warrior in a gray, cloudy afternoon, promising to teach her apprentice everything she knew, and raising her head to the moon when she was named deputy and thanking StarClan.

Petalstar opened her eyes, the air seeming to sting them.

She didn't jump up to her usual place. Instead, she jumped up a high, dead tree. She clawed at the rotten, willing herself to keep steady as she climbed. Finally, she stood silhouetted against the early evening light behind her, through the pines. "Cats of ShadowClan," she called out.

Iceshadow was at the edge of the crowd, blue eyes unreadable as she waited for the words which would make her fate. As she waited for the new deputy to be made, she felt a flicker of ambition raising within her. She could not be picked as deputy, of course; aside from succumbing to insanity when StarClan had given her her destiny, she had not mentored an apprentice. But she remembered the lost dream of leading her Clan, and felt an ache at its destruction.

"As we mourn for the death of our brave deputy, which many of us knew as a kit, apprentice, and warrior, words cannot convey what we feel. There are many lessons life has to teach, and many of you have learned this already..."

Words are too small for live memories, the pines seemed to whisper as Iceshadow stood among them.

"The new deputy of ShadowClan will be Hollyfire," Petalstar finalized. "And we must also welcome one who has left us back into our ranks. Iceshadow of ShadowClan - I know StarClan gave you a destiny to shake the forest, a prophecy came also to me."

There were murmurs of surprise in the cats gathered, but Iceshadow had stood on all fours and was gazing at Petalstar with a silent hope in her eyes.

"You will shake the forest, Iceshadow. Someday, you will understand how. You are welcomed back into our Clan. Make your peace." Petalstar leapt off of the dead tree with no branches, onto a twisting log beneath it. "My old den will be grown over with ivy and branches. Briarrush is to be buried there." she finished.

Several cats began to congratulate the lucky Hollyfire, but Iceshadow decided to make a peace which was not her own.

Fishshadow and Mudsplash were sitting under a pine tree, talking about prey, patrols, and generally nothing. Iceshadow shook her head as she looked sadly at the look in their eyes. After they had separated and her old mentor had headed for the freshkill pile, the former apprentice cut him off.

"Fishshadow," she murmured softly to him.

"Iceshadow." There was a moment of silence as he looked at the apprentice who had become a warrior. "Welcome back," he said eventually, happy to have her back, but not knowing what to say.

"There are things too small for words, Fishshadow - and then there are those who are afraid words will not convey it. Just tell her with words from your heart, and she will understand." She blinked once at him, and then departed.

Later, when the moon had risen, the two cats stood together. "Mudsplash, I need to tell you something." Fishshadow said anxiously.

Mudsplash stood uncertain for a moment. "Anything. You can tell me anything," she assured him.

"There is a long, beautiful way to say this that will convey what I mean, but I don't know what it is. Mudsplash, I love you." He said it simply, but he couldn't keep the emotion from his voice.

"M-me?" she stuttered suddenly, brown eyes wide. "But I'm a nobody!"

Now it was his turn to be surprised. "A nobody? You're a great hunter, you're loyal, you're a great friend... but I feel something more for you."

"Then..." she still looked afraid as she said it, as if he would take his words back. "I love you too."

Words do not convey.

*.*

Iceshadow was sitting alone looking through the forest that had become her home. In a way, she was more than happy to be home, and she was so happy for Mudsplash and Fishshadow.

But it was hard to be surrounded by a joy, a love that she could not share.

At that moment, the cat she least wanted to see in the world appeared.

Snakeclaw, with amber eyes shining, brown pelt fluffed up, and an expression she could not understand. "Iceshadow," he called quietly.

Iceshadow turned to him with cold eyes. Just go, she thought. Don't break my heart as well.

"I know why what happened to happened. I know everything, and I want to tell you something." He didn't let her stop him as a flood of words poured out. "What I felt for you was the purest emotion I've had, the best feeling of my life, and when I thought I'd lost you... It was like I'd lost everything. It was like even the warmest day was cold, like the sun had gone out and there was no light in the world. Iceshadow, I think it's high time I told you... I've loved you since the first moment I saw you, I've loved you even when we were just friends, I felt like I've known you forever and I love your bravery, and your loyalty, and your anger. I love everything about you. Don't leave me like this, separated by a barrier and never able to be the same as we were before. I want you back, like we were that fateful day. I love you."

"Snakeclaw... I can't tell you what I felt when I thought you didn't love me. I love you like I've never loved anyone and I'll always love you." Their eyes met and in a moment everything was right again.

Love may be forever... but life is not.