(A/N) K Im back! I wrote this chapter 5 times! In 3 different point of views, trying to find the best way to tell this part of the story. I'll think you'll all be pleased with this one :)

-Review Corner-

KuroPhoenix I know...so sad and adorable :(

sadhunnybunny36 Im glad everything is ok now :)

As White As Snow Thanks! I was trying to go for that effect movies use, enhancing the scene with background music. But also I wanted to portray the powerful effects music can have, enhancing the emotions sealed inside the subconcious. Music can make things better or exponentially worse. Oh and really good song by the way, thanks for sharing that :)

Misato92 It makes me happy to hear from you guys, of course I have to answer back! :) Im so excited to hear Im keeping everyone in character! Especially Kyoya ;)

Adorable Reader I liked that part too (Dora the Explorer moment, LoL) but really, writing that part made me all warm and fuzzy inside :3 Oh and I know the feeling, nobody knows Im here either, my family thinks I blog all the time, rofl.

OmNomNom The power of hugs WILL prevail! I actually read somewhere that Bisco Hatori mad Hikaru straight and Kaoru somewhat bisexual (specifically in the second manga, Kaoru's profile called him a "handsome Homosexual" but him and his brother had a crush on Haruhi at one point). To what extent is he bi? No idea, but personally I just think being the Uke all the time was starting to affect him, lol

bleachfangirl7 Thank youz! Oh and I was watching Bleach just last night...felt like sharing (^_^")

And the story goes on...

*Chapter 13*

*Memories That Can't Be Forgotten*

-Kaoru's POV-

I'm a moron.

While Hikaru was on his date I had actually taken the time to throw hand towels over all the knife holders in our kitchen.

Out of site out of mind...right?

I thought about messing with our Butler John or one of the other servants before I remembered they don't work on Sundays.

I'm all alone...

I came down here in the first place because I hadn't eaten since breakfast yesterday. But the more I looked at those towels...

I shook my head and decided to go back upstairs and play Xbox or something.

I was use to feeling lonely, but this time it just...it felt like the world had moved on without me...

Even if I'm gone they'll move on, just like this...

By the time I made it to my room I didn't even feel like playing anymore, but I turned on the system anyway.

I pulled out my phone and added "Video Games" to the list before walking over to the bookcase to pick out a game.

I ran my finger over the massive collection, reading the titles out loud "Modern Warfare 3, Skyrim, when did Hikaru get Dishonored?, Halo, Saints Row the third, Haha Hikaru sucks at Marvel vs Capom, hey I remember Naruto!"

I pulled Naruto: Ninja Storm 2 off the shelf, remembering how Hikaru and I use to play this for hours. I chuckled to myself when I remembered how we bawled our eyes out at the end of Jiraiya's story mode.

I looked back at the shelf. There were so many memories wrapped in each of these games. So many memories of us, just in this tiny space alone. I remembered whenever we use to feel lonely, we would sit in front of this bookshelf and reminisce, pulling out each game, laughing, sometimes even crying. We swore to each other that even if no one else was there for us, we would always be there for each other.

Hikaru...

I put the game back on the shelf and made up my mind.

I was going to tell Hikaru the truth.

-Later that night-

I glanced back at the clock.

7:13

It wasn't like I actually expected Hikaru to be back at EXACTLY 7:00, but each passing second was bringing me closer and closer to hurting Hikaru more than I ever have in my life.

I keep finding new ways to steal his happiness away...

I was sitting on the couch in the Family Room, pinching my arm in an attempt to make the bad thoughts go away, pinching even harder whenever I tried to talk myself out of what I was going to do.

I'm started bouncing my leg when I could have sworn I heard a voice...

Great...I AM a schizophrenic...

The voice got louder, but I still couldn't make out what it was saying. I wasn't trying to. I just bounced my leg even faster "I'm not hearing this...I'm not hearing this...I'm not-"

"I SAID OPEN THE DOOR KAORU!"

I flew off the couch and ran to the door. I grabbed the doorknob and was just about to turn it when I froze there.

Do I really want to do this?

Hesitantly, I turned the knob and opened the door.

I took a step back to let him in "Um...why are you wet?"

He walked inside and started wringing out his shirt, dripping water all over the floor. He gave me the 'are you serious' face before I realized it was raining outside.

I closed the door back and locked it "Sorry...so uh, how was your date?"

He had a slight smile on his face "It...actually went better than expected. Her name's Sakura."

"Sakura Haruno? Does she have a big forehead?"

"Ha that's funny!"

"Really?"

"No." he deadpanned.

I noticed a white box at his feet "What's that?"

He picked it up and smirked at me "Come to the Kitchen and I'll show you!"

As we walked to the kitchen I wondered how I was going to tell Hikaru what was happening...maybe I should just forget the whole thin- OUCH!

I pinched my arm again.

When we got the kitchen Hikaru was the first to walk in. He stopped and looked around "Why are there towels everywhere?"

He walked up to one, box still in hand, and used it to dry of his hair "Well?" he turned back to me.

I just shrugged and sat down at the kitchen table "So...what's in the box?"

With the towel still on his head he took a seat across from me and slid me the box "Just something I found on the way home."

He looked a little nervous. I looked at the box. Now that I had a clear view of it I noticed a drawing on the front. It was an anime face, he looked irritated, and he also had my exact same hairstyle.

I narrowed my eyes and held up the box for him to see "Is this suppose to be me?"

He nearly fell out of the chair laughing "Your making the exact same face!"

I stuck my tounge out at him and sat the box back down. I wonder what it could be? It wasn't very heavy...

I stared at it.

Hikaru was still laughing "Well? Aren't you going to open it?"

I just kept staring "Nope."

He stopped laughing "Wha-? Why not?"

"Nope."

"Open the box Kaoru."

"Nah...I don't think so." I teased.

"Open the damn box Kaoru."

I smirked "Suddenly that face isn't so funny anymore is it?"

He smiled and rolled his eyes "Just open the box."

I laughed and opened the lid. I almost cried at what I saw.

Inside...was a Teddy Bear.

It was fluffy and white, with a red tie.

I looked up at Hikaru "You...actually got me a Teddy Bear?"

He started rubbing the back of his neck with his hand "Well yeah. You wanted one and I felt bad for not winning you one yesterday. I know it's not that special anymore since I had to buy it, but I hope you still like it."

I couldn't believe it. I didn't even want one in the first place, and yet Hikaru went through all the trouble to get me one anyway...

He cares about me so much...

I could feel my smile slipping away "Hikaru..."

He looked nervous "What's wrong? You don't like it?"

I pulled out the bear and gave it a tiny, sorrowful squeeze "I need to tell you something..."

-Hikaru's POV-

The way he was holding that bear, I could tell he was scared of something.

"What is it Kaoru?"

His eyes never left the bear "I...lately..."

He stopped and I could feel my insides twisting up, he looked so scared, what was he going to tell me?

I slowly reached out and removed the bear from his hands. I set it on the table and took his hands into my own, tracing tiny circles on the backs of his hands, trying to calm him down "Its ok Kaoru."

I looked straight into his eyes but he never returned my gaze.

He took a deep breath "...I've been...having nightmares..."

He looked up at me and I gave his hands a reassuring squeeze, waiting for him to continue.

His hands started to tremble slightly "I've been having nightmares...about killing myself..."

His hands were still shaking but he kept looking at me; staring at me, waiting for a response.

I willed myself to keep a straight face. I was frightened by what he had told me but this was a delicate situation. I knew I had to say something; anything! But what? What do I say? I can't just ask him if he was going to do it. He was so scared, he probably didn't even know himself...

I slowly drew a breath I didn't know I was holding "Have you told anyone else?"

He looked back at our hands, slowly shaking his head.

I carefully studied his eyes "Is there anymore you want to tell me?"

I saw little tears starting to form in his eyes as he held my hands tighter "I'm...I'm s-scared it will actually happen."

I got up from the table and walked around to him, my hands never leaving his. When I was close enough he let go and wrapped his arms around me. I just held him in my arms, letting him cry "I'm not going to let that happen, Kaoru."

My brother needed me and I had no idea what to do.

But I knew one thing.

If holding him like this was enough to make him feel safe again, I would stay here...just like this.

For as long as he needed me to.

(A/N) And now Hikaru knows the truth, but how can he save the life of the only brother he's ever known; the entire other half of his own life?

Also I know they said they were going to do a karaoke night tomorrow but I think the songs are annoying you guys...should I do it anyway?