Chapter 32

It was Sunday and all the riders were at the station at the same time since none had a ride till the following morning. Teaspoon had allowed his boys to have some time to relax by reducing their chores to the minimum. After keeping up with the rides and their responsibilities and helping in building the schoolhouse, the marshal and Rachel decided that they deserved a nice treat.

The station mistress had made roast pork and a lemon cake for lunch, and after playing some of the modern games that Teaspoon was so fond of, the whole Express family had sat down to taste the delicious meat and a piece of the scrumptious cake for dessert. Lou had also joined Kid and his friends on this lovely Sunday and was enjoying the time greatly. She had to admit that she felt at home whenever she came to the station as everybody welcomed her like part of their makeshift family, especially since she and Kid started courting.

After lunch Teaspoon had returned to his responsibilities in town while the riders had begun playing some games of cards in the bunkhouse. Kid and Lou had gone for a brief stroll, and now they were sitting on the swing at Rachel's place. The rider had his arm around Lou's shoulders while the girl rested her head against his chest. The steady rhythm of his beating heart on her ear had a powerful soothing effect, and she wished she could stretch this moment forever. The thought, though, brought a bittersweet sensation over her as a constant fear kept nagging at her perturbingly and she couldn't make it disappear.

Trying to entertain her mind with something else, she lifted her head from his chest to look at his face while she called his name, "Kid?" The rider turned all his attention to the girl while sending her a quizzical look. "Yesterday," she continued, "Mr. Grigson… you know… my former boss from the hotel came to see me."

"What for?"

"Well, it seems that the ban against me has been kind of lifted, and he offered me a job," she explained.

"Are you actually thinking of quitting at the store and going back to the hotel?" Kid asked with a confused frown. He knew that Lou was quite happy working for Tompkins and how much she had hated to be the hotel cleaner.

"Not really," Lou replied softly. "I'd be doing just a few hours in the evening twice a week, and the night job I had cleaning the social hall, remember?"

One look at Kid's face, and it was crystal clear that he was anything but happy. "Lou, we hardly have time to see each other as it is," he protested vehemently. "What kind of courtship is this if I can't see you?"

His words made her adopt a cocky challenging posture as she exclaimed, "Oh please. Of course we will see each other." She couldn't blame him for reacting that way since she also wished they could spend more time together but her pride didn't allow her to admit that he was right.

"Of course we will!" he let out sarcastically. "And when, Lou? When I go to Tompkins for provisions? And now I can't even escort my girlfriend to the social! Simply perfect!"

"We never go anyway," she insisted. It was true. In this last month whenever there had been a dance, either Kid was away on a ride or they simply had preferred to spend that time away from crowds and loud music.

"But I'd love to take you sometime and show the rest of the world that we're together!" Kid continued in the same angered tone. It frustrated him that they didn't have many opportunities to be together under the present circumstances, and he didn't know how to cope with it if things were about to get worse.

"I need the money, Kid," Louise tried to reason with him. This was their first disagreement as a couple and she felt she needed to stay calm. With a great effort she tried to control her mood and stretch her little patience a bit more. "You know, my siblings count on me. Nothing has changed. I have the same situation, and I haven't seen them in ages."

"I know your situation, and I don't intend to change it," Kid retorted, feeling slightly hurt that she thought he was trying to make her forget her family. "I'm very fond of those children myself. All I'm saying is that if you take on too many responsibilities here in Rock Creek, your chances to go and visit your siblings won't improve much but rather the opposite. If you need money, I can…"

"I don't want your money!" Lou cut him off a bit too roughly, her resolution of keeping calm forgotten. "This is something I have to do on my own!"

Her words managed to anger him completely and rising to his feet, he looked down at her while he said in a grave voice. "Fine by me if that's what you want. And as you apparently are so fond of doing everything on your own, I won't disturb you anymore… just in case I get in the way." Before she could react, the Southerner stomped off the porch and across the little yard towards the bunkhouse.

"Kid!" Louise called loudly as she jumped to her feet and leaned over the verandah. The rider didn't stop and continued at the same brisk pace. "Kid!" she called a second time, but she got the same or rather no response. "I didn't mean it like that!" she tried to make herself be heard across the wide distance that now separated them. Her clumsy words had sent Kid into a foul mood, and when he finally entered the bunkhouse without turning back once, she understood that she had really tripped up and Kid would now need to cool off by himself.

With a sigh Louise dropped on the same seat heavily and started to swing to and fro as if by inertia. Suddenly she was feeling very low and lonely without Kid by her side. The day had started fantastically, and now it had to end terribly just because of a simple remark. Kid could sometimes be so unreasonable and thickheaded that it was impossible to talk to him. She hadn't even decided yet whether to accept that darn job he had gotten so angry about. However, Kid had reached his own conclusions and hadn't let her explain herself. When Mr. Grigson had approached her with this proposal, she had been more inclined to say no than the other way. Today she had just wanted to know Kid's opinion, but she had been so insistent about it because his flat refusal to the idea had made her react that way.

Her eyes remained fixed on the bunkhouse door, Lou prayed that he would eventually regret his outburst and step out towards her. Her expectations, though, failed as the door never opened. She felt her heart shrink in disappointment, and then a voice sounding near her almost made her jump out of her skin. When she turned her head to her side, she saw Rachel standing close to the swing. Louise sent her a quizzical look and the woman repeated what had previously been lost to the girl's ears. "I heard loud voices, and I wanted to make sure you were all right, Louise."

The petite girl nodded ruefully and added, "Just fine. Kid and I just had a … little disagreement."

Rachel took a few steps closer and grinned amused by Lou's remark. "Well, that's a common occurrence between young people in love." Louise looked at her skeptically and noticing her expression, Rachel added, "And you know what's so fun about fighting with your man, Louise?" The girl didn't try to answer and the older woman elaborated for her. "The making-up part." Lou had to blush at her friend's remark despite herself and after a brief lapse Rachel asked, "Care if I join you?"

"Please," Louise responded promptly, moving over in the swing to leave some room for the station mistress.

The two women remained in silence for a while and then Rachel piped up, "It was about time we had a nice women's chat … you know without any men around."

Lou smiled at the reference as she could understand the woman in her desire to have some moments free of the men she lived with. Louise could say that Rachel had become a good friend, her only female friend, and it was at this point that she started to wonder whether she should use this opportunity to share her worries with her.

"It's been a while since the last time we had a nice conversation, ain't it?" Rachel remarked as Lou's mind traveled back to that occasion. It had been a bit before Kid and she had started seeing each other. That time Rachel had invited her to have tea at her place, and the two women had really enjoyed the company and the conversation. The station mistress had never mentioned about Kid's love interest in the girl back then, but Louise suspected that Rachel had noticed what the couple had been unwilling to admit to themselves. Now it was public knowledge the fact that she and Kid were more than friends. Yet, Rachel and she had never had the opportunity to talk about it.

"So tell me," the station mistress started after a while, "how are things between you and Kid … well … apart from your disagreement now?"

"Oh fine," Lou exclaimed. "He's great to me."

Something in her voice told Rachel that the girl wasn't as convinced of her words as she tried to show. "Something wrong, Louise?"

"No!" she hurried to correct her friend, hating to have given her an inaccurate impression. "Kid's just wonderful. He's all I've ever wanted but …" She stopped short, not sure whether to voice her worries out loud for the first time. Admitting that there was actually something not quite right made it seem more real and all of sudden Lou felt very scared.

"But what, honey?"

Louise lowered her eyes embarrassed and started twisting her hands nervously. She really didn't know how to explain herself to Rachel, but she knew she needed to get this worry off her chest. "It's … uh … it's something of a … a very intimate nature," she finally managed to utter.

Rachel furrowed her brow in confusion, curious about the girl's enigmatic words. She was starting to get concerned about what apparently had Lou so troubled. Taking the girl's hand in hers she said softly, "Louise, you know you can tell me anything." The younger woman nodded, still not daring to meet her friend's eyes, and feeling that Lou wasn't very eager to speak, Rachel gave her a little push tactfully. "What is it, Lou? Is it Kid?"

The girl then lifted her eyes to the lady and replied with clear hesitation, "Sort of. Well, it's got to do with both of us." Lou stopped briefly, not sure how to continue, but now that she had started opening up, she needed to carry on however embarrassing it could be. "When we are together, he's affectionate and all, but …" She paused to inhale deeply and instantly let the air out shakily. "I feel… I feel that he … refrains himself from going further than soft kisses and hugs. He acts as if I am made out of china and could break at any moment."

"And you want to…?"

"No!" Lou almost cried, covering her blushing cheeks with her hands. The conversation was getting more and more embarrassing by the minute. It was difficult to explain her worries without giving the impression that Rachel had hinted just now. "I mean… I ain't sure I'm ready … for … you know what." Lou lowered her hands to her lap and sighed. "All I want is not to feel like dynamite in his hands. I wished he'd let himself be carried away by what he really feels." She stopped briefly and shaking her head ruefully, she continued in a dreamy voice, "Our very first kiss was just amazing, but then..." Louise sighed once again and didn't finish the thought.

"What, Louise?" Rachel insisted.

"He's afraid of touching me, Rachel. Just that," Lou explained with a bitter expression.

The station mistress smiled softly, feeling that her young friend was getting a bit over the top. She knew that things could be awkward when one was young and in love. The feelings could be utterly overwhelming and powerful, leaving the person lost and confused to say the least. "Louise, Kid is crazy about you. I'm sure you got nothing to worry about. He respects you like all men should … maybe a bit too much in his case, but that's the way he was taught to treat women."

Lou smiled wryly, letting out a deep sigh. "I know it ain't that, Rachel. All this is because of Wicks," she stated sadly. The woman sent her a confused frown, and the girl continued, "Maybe I should never have told him what he did to me." Lou hated to bring Wicks up in her conversations when all she wanted was to forget that he ever existed. Kid had told her that Rachel had kind of guessed what she had undergone as a young girl. Lou didn't like sharing that part of her life with anybody else, not even with Rachel, but now that she knew she couldn't do anything about it. "I feel he's afraid he's gonna to shock me or scare me or … I don't know. I was always so afraid that my past would ruin things for us. He might eventually want to find somewhere else what he can't have with me." The last part of her word came out in a shaky whisper, and the tears quickly welled up in her eyes. After the fight with Kid, she was especially sensitive and touchy, and her feelings got out of control at the drop of a hat.

Rachel brought her arm around her friend's shoulders and stroked her back comfortingly. "Honey, you know that Kid would never do something like that to you. I think you worry a bit too much. All you need to do is talk to him and solve your doubts."

At her words Lou's head jerked up while her eyes shot open in horror. "I can't do that!" she exclaimed loudly. "I'd die of embarrassment." If it had been terribly mortifying to tell Rachel about her concerns, being a woman and all, Lou just couldn't even imagine talking about the same with Kid. She was sure her words would come out the wrong way, and she'd end up confusing or even hurting him unwillingly.

"Well," Rachel continued, amused by her obvious shyness, "then you need to show him what you want with some subtlety or … maybe without it. You know, honey, men are sometimes a bit thick when it comes to the women they love, so it's our unspoken duty to teach them." Lou grinned sheepishly at the reference even though she wasn't totally sure what the station mistress meant.

"Thanks, Rachel," the girl expressed her gratitude sincerely. She didn't know whether she would solve her little problem, but at least talking to the woman had made her feel a bit better.

"You're very welcome," the station mistress let out with a smile and casting her eyes to the distance ahead of her, she noticed the bunkhouse door open and Kid step out. He left the porch and started walking across the yard, his eyes obviously searching for Lou. "I'm sure you'll be fine, Louise. See? There comes your Prince Charming."

Lou directed her eyes towards where Rachel was pointing at and her mouth instantly twitched into a shy smile as soon as she laid eyes on him. The girl kept staring at him through the distance, and as she seemed stuck on the spot, the station mistress patted her back as she egged her on, "Come on, go to him."

Lou smiled her thanks and in a flash she jumped to her feet and flew down the porch and across the yard. Rachel watched the pair as they met in the middle. Kid said something to her while she nodded. Then he kissed her on the lips softly which ended with the two of them in a tight hug.

"They'll be fine," Rachel said aloud as she rose to her feet and proceeded to step into her house. "Nothing's stronger than true love." Her thoughts automatically went to her late husband and how much they'd had to struggle to finally become man and wife. Unfortunately, life hadn't let them enjoy much, and Henry had been unfairly taken from her. Louise reminded her so much of herself at that age, and Rachel could swear that those two would find their way. All the station mistress hoped… or rather prayed was that they were given the chance of a long happy life together. "They'll be fine," she repeated and with a last look at the couple who were now walking hand in hand she smiled and closed the door behind her.

It was hot and stuffy inside the stage as the two women tightly held their hands wherever they could to avoid bumping their heads against the carriage's wooden top. After the last weeks of constant rain, the roads were unsteady and covered in mud and holes, making the stage trip even bumpier than usual. The two women were the only ones inside the carriage as the rest of the passengers had got off in the last town they had stopped. The ladies were glad to escape the prison of being cooped up between two other stout people, but even with the extra space, the heat inside the compartment was unbearable and the smell was almost as bad.

"I'm not sure whether it was such a good idea to take the stage instead of getting a wagon," the younger woman commented. "I can't stand this much longer."

The other woman shook her head as she replied. "You remember what happened the last time we traveled on a wagon? We almost ended up getting killed."

"It was an accident! And nothing happened," she said and a smile instantly tugged at the corner of her mouth as her mind played the even that had happened many months ago, but it vanished as soon as the woman opposite her sent her a disapproving look. With a sigh she met her eyes and asked, "You still mad at me for making us move again?"

"I just don't understand why. We were perfectly well where we were."

"Rock Creek's a much bigger town, and this new job is the ideal opportunity to take me out of that hole. I was so tired of feeling like a bird in a cage," the young woman complained intensely.

The older lady looked at her with a skeptical expression and asked, "Are you sure it's just that?"

"Of course!" she exclaimed and letting out a sigh she added irritated, "I'm sick and tired of you questioning all my actions. Sometimes you make me feel as if there wasn't any fresh air for me to breathe!"

"I just want the best for you!" the older woman stated gravelly, used to the other woman's accusations of overprotectiveness, but feeling hurt nonetheless.

"Maybe what you think is the best for me is not so good after all," the girl replied angrily. "Why can't you let me be for a bit?"

The older woman stared at her sadly but did not say another word. Unfortunately, there was nothing new in the girl's stings, and all she could do was to silently bear her sometimes too cruel words. Young people could often be very unreasonable and ungrateful, thinking that they knew better than their more experienced elders. The woman then turned her head to look out of the small window and never spoke again. Silence settled between the two women as the stage continued its very unsteady driving towards Rock Creek.

The sun shone brightly in the sky above as Kid and Louise walked along Rock Creek's main street arm in arm. They had just had lunch at the local restaurant and were now leisurely strolling around town. Today against all odds both of them had the morning off and had decided to make the most of it. Lou couldn't feel prouder than holding the arm of the man she loved. He made her feel very special and even though she hadn't done anything to improve the situation she had told Rachel about a couple of days ago, after fighting with her demons, she had decided to let it rest for a bit and revel in what she had right now.

As a matter of fact, it was difficult to find a moment when she could actually tackle the issue. They were hardly ever completely alone since they usually spent their time in a public place or somebody was always around when they met at the station. Besides, Rachel was right. Since they were a couple, Kid had acted all proper-like and never came to her rooms in town, stating that it wasn't right for him to visit her there. All in all, Lou felt quite frustrated and was really surprised at the feelings controlling her whole self. She wished she could have Kid for herself all the time, and she was sure that she would never get enough of him. Her own thoughts shocked her and she chastised herself repeatedly and told herself that all she needed now was to enjoy what she had and nothing else.

Lately an idea had been forming in her mind, and when she had shared it with Rachel, the woman had agreed to help her to carry out her plans. Without saying a word to Kid, Louise had turned down the job offer from Mr. Grigson. She had to admit that the Southerner was right. They needed some quality time to enjoy together and also she had to find the opportunity to go and visit Theresa and Jeremiah. Having two jobs would make her mission impossible, and even though she'd have welcomed the extra money, she finally had said no. Kid, though, still believed that she had accepted the job, and whenever he mentioned anything about it, Lou skillfully started talking about something else.

Louise had wanted to give Kid a nice surprise for a bit now as a way to show him how much he meant to her. In their recent fight Kid had complained that they'd never gone to a dance together. Well, this was going to change now. Next Saturday the town had set up a social to celebrate the building of the new schoolhouse, and she planned to go there and spend the night dancing with her man. Of course she had told Kid that she'd have to work after the event, so she wouldn't be able to attend the social. The rider had bought her lie entirely, and Lou beamed happily imagining his face when he saw her appear unexpectedly that day. She had already bought a beautiful lilac dress with some of her savings, and Rachel was secretly teaching her how to dance. This would be her first time at a proper dance, and she wouldn't want to make a show in front of Kid and the rest of the people.

Louise was so immersed in her thoughts that she never heard Kid calling her name four times. It was when he stopped dead short, and she felt her arm jerk back, snapping her out of her reverie that she turned to him. "What are you thinking about that has you so absent-minded?"

"Nothing special," she lied, her eyes gleaming in mischief.

Kid chuckled, not believing her fib and simply said, "Well, it must be something really nice if it makes you smile so much."

Lou grinned in acknowledgment and added, "That's because I was thinking of you."

The rider threw her an amused look and they resumed their walking in comforting silence. Suddenly, Louise stopped short making the Southerner jolt to an abrupt halt. "Kid, let's not go that way," she said in an urgent voice, discreetly pointing her index finger ahead of them.

"Why not?" Kid asked with a frown, but directing his eyes where she was motioning, all he saw was a couple of gentlemen obviously waiting for the stage, one of whom was the mayor. "What's wrong, Lou?"

"Please," she almost begged. Since the incident that happened a couple of months ago during that pathetic dinner in Doritha's house, the mayor had practically sworn to do everything possible to embitter Lou's existence. His attempts to kick her out of Rock Creek had failed when Tompkins had given her the opportunity to work for him at the store. After that, he had subtly continued a campaign against the girl even though Doritha had been gone for a while now. Whenever he crossed paths with Lou, he threw her snide remarks and kept leering at her with obvious scorn. Besides, she knew through the ladies coming to the store that he sniped her in front of others.

Lou wasn't sure whether that hostility was caused because he had felt his manly pride had been beaten up in his low schemes, or because she was a poor excuse in his constant rivalry with Mr. Tompkins. Either way Louise thought that his attitude was ridiculous and despising; a man of over fifty trying to morally fight a young girl as if he were a schoolboy made Lou wonder what kind of person had been chosen to look after the town's welfare. Therefore, for all these reasons Lou wasn't very willing to go near him, especially when she was with Kid. This situation with the mayor was making her run out of patience, and she knew one day she would show that stuck-up wimp how well she could defend herself. Yet, today wasn't the day to get her claws into him. She was enjoying her time with Kid so much that she didn't want it to get ruined because of that idiot of a mayor.

Noticing a desperate note in her voice Kid finally relented. "All right. As you wish." He sent her a quizzical look, hoping that she explained her reasons, but when she never spoke, Kid simply started leading her in the opposite direction, leaving the two men behind.

While the couple was enjoying their stroll once again, the couple of gentlemen then noticed the stage coming from the other edge of town at full speed. The mayor let out a satisfied smile, glad that the wait was finally over. Like usual, the stage was delayed, and they had been waiting in the same place for the last two hours. He made a comment to his secretary, who he had brought along, and straightened his black jacket in an attempt to make himself presentable to meet the new teacher. The report Mayor McGregor had been sent regarding the lady's qualifications and experience left him genuinely impressed. According to these records, the new teacher had received her certificate at a prestigious academy in Charleston, and then taught in well regarded schools in the area. For some unspecified reason, she had moved to the west half a year ago and been the teacher of Sweetwater since then. The mayor silently congratulated himself for managing to get this fine asset of a lady for their community. It would sure mean another success for his political career, and he'd doubtlessly remind people of this when the polls took place.

The stage halted to a complete stop before the two men and the mayor approached it at the same time that its small door opened. A young lady slid out of the carriage. She was slender and tall, with jet black hair tied in a chignon. Mayor McGregor silently thought how beautiful she was as he took a few steps closer and removed his hat in gentlemanlike politeness. "Ma'am, welcome to Rock Creek. I'm Mayor McGregor and this young man by my side is my secretary, Jarvis Randolph," he said as he took the lady's gloved hand and brought it to his lips. The woman had a deep impact on him and he just couldn't avert his eyes from this lovely angel. In truth he had imagined that he would be waiting for an old comely spinster as the new teacher and would never had thought that a clever girl like her could be so attractive.

The lady smiled and nodded her head to the two men in acknowledgment. "Nice to meet you, gentlemen," she said. "I'm Samantha Edgars and …," she turned her head back and saw the other woman coming after her, "and this is Martha, my … companion."

The mayor stared at the black woman who the young lady called Martha, not really sure how to feel about the new schoolteacher having what with all security was her slave in town. He knew that slavery was a common practice in South Carolina, where Miss Edgars came from, but Rock Creek was a slave-free town. Not so long ago they'd had their share of problems caused by the conflicts between pro-slavery supporters and abolitionists. Fortunately, they were now enjoying some peaceful times, and the mayor feared that nerves would fray again if this young lady flaunted her slave in front of everybody. Besides, she was the schoolteacher, the person who was going to be responsible for their children's education, so he didn't think her way of life was the most appropriate as an example to their future pupils.

An uncomfortable silence followed after Martha's introduction to the men and guessing what Mayor McGregor was thinking, Samantha hurried to explain their situation, "Martha's just my companion, not my slave. She's a free woman."

"I see," the mayor let out visibly relieved, and once the matter was cleared to his satisfaction he politely tipped his head to the black woman, and added, "So now, ladies, let me welcome you warmly to our community. I hope you enjoy staying and living in our town."

Samantha flashed a wide smile in his direction as she took the man's arm and let him guide her to the wagon he had brought along. "Oh I'm sure we will. I have no doubt whatsoever."