Aquamarine
Knowledge is power.
This is a fact I have known since birth.
Knowledge has always equated to power.
Over the centuries, the strongest and most powerful men always had an intelligent scholar by their side.
It made them more powerful, more able to formulate and carry out their plans.
Certainly, knowledge has made me very powerful.
Knowledge has gained me respect.
Knowledge has gained me followers.
Knowledge has even gained me admirers.
Is that not what one wishes for?
Power…and control.
The lure of both are great.
Many have fallen under their spell.
Many will continue to fall.
I understand, though.
I understand completely.
I have fallen under their spell as well.
Although, given my situation, it was quite necessary.
To have power; to have control, my first step to that was knowledge.
And I learned, little by little, that the first step of knowledge was, in truth, the only step.
The more I acquired, the more powerful I became.
As my colleagues busied themselves with their other silly ideas,
I busied by self with obtaining more and more knowledge.
As they gathered power by other means, I gained it by learning.
Something I once heard: Learning is the only type of consumption that won't make you gain weight.
It's a childish, inaccurate description, to be sure.
But I like it, somehow.
And so I consumed, more and more, until I felt as though I knew everything.
As others around me used brute force and careless planning to achieve (or rather, fail) in their many endeavors, I walked the path of science and I triumphed.
I am a scientist.
I revel in precision, and accuracy.
To me, the ultimate desire in life is to become powerful through the means of science.
Anyone can fight their way to the top.
But I, I shall simply step lightly over the bodies of those who have carelessly fallen down after forcing themselves up there, with no logic used whatsoever.
It might be a slower journey than the others, the road to power.
But instead of sprinting my way there, I will walk.
Elegantly.
And delicately.
Perhaps, slowly.
But surely. And precisely.
I shall never fail.
A thought occurred to be, some moments back.
Actually, in all honesty, it could be that I have known it all along.
This too, is something I once heard: A vulnerability makes one stronger.
Quite ironic, is it not?
The thought that I could be vulnerable, even as I have amassed all of this knowledge, was unbearable in every way.
The thought…frightened me.
I have not been frightened in a long time.
From the time I was a young girl, I have always thought that no matter who leaves me, or who hurts me, science would always be on my side.
It is science that has been my savior; my guide through everything.
I put my faith, all of it, into science.
That is, until I met her.
She was not an imposing figure, in the way other girls sometimes are.
She was of an average height.
She had features that are best described as kind, though I seldom see kindness for myself.
She was not intimidating.
She did not attempt to threaten me.
Why did I feel threatened by her, then?
It's very strange.
Usually, when I have a question, it can easily be answered by books and computers.
Questions are easily answered by the means of science.
Why could I not answer this simple question?
I did not understand.
For the first time in my life, I could not understand.
All she said was one word.
Only that single word captured my attention.
Love.
I have heard it many times, and simply dismissed it as human folly.
Love was not scientific.
The feelings people associate with love are caused by a number of hormones, yes, but love itself is something I have never believed in.
Yet the way that girl spoke of it…as if something so unscientific could coexist with science itself, was unbelievable.
She was intelligent, of that I was sure.
Perhaps almost as intelligent as I am.
My first thought was that she must have been powerful.
But then, as the word 'love' slipped from her mouth, I knew that she was weak.
Weak, because she will never know true power, the power of knowledge and science alone.
She spoke to me, as if I was the weaker one.
Foolish.
Frightening.
I did not understand.
But it didn't bother me for very long.
My life has been preordained.
It is dedicated to one thing, and one thing only.
Science.
Knowledge.
Power is knowledge.
Knowledge is power.
Of that I am sure.
It is a fact I have always known.
Tonight I will complete my duty, the duty that has always been given to me.
And tomorrow, I shall seek more wisdom.
I am strong.
I am powerful.
I am a scientist.
Always.