Finally, the two of them had left Gai´s students to their training and were walking around the lake – Kakashi fuming silently, Gai still cheerfully oblivious. Or at least Kakashi had thought he was until Gai gave him a lingering sidelong glance and said evenly, "If you aren´t going to apologize, then why did you come?"

It was a valid question, Kakashi had to admit. It was also one he didn´t really know how to answer. Why had he felt the need to get back into Gai´s good graces? Why had he been so quick to believe that everything was well between them and had made his move first, when he was usually much more cautious and distant?

Looking back on the last weeks, Kakashi could probably blame the stress of his duties. Missions had been coming in in abundance and, as a Jounin with no lower class subordinates to consider, he had been issued his fair share of high risk solo missions. But it was more than that.

It was his training.

He couldn´t even remember anymore how many hours he had spent trying to figure out a way to make his Sharingan change, to make it evolve. Focusing, collecting his chakra in his (Obito´s) left eye until he thought the eyeball would simply burst out of his skull any moment; the pain, a pounding sensation emanating from his pupil and echoing all through his head in ripples of sheer agony, forcing him to stop. He had tried everything he had ever learned about chakra manipulation, but the outcome never changed.

He had thought about giving up – especially now that, after his conversation with Tsunade, he could tell himself that his doubts were justified, that it might be the smarter choice to accept what seemed to be his natural limitations, and to improve his other skills instead – but then he would close his eyes in resignation and through the red fireworks of pain erupting in the darkness behind his eye he would see –

Obito still half-smiling, even as Rin´s scalpel slides under his eyelid –

And he knew that he would never be able to forgive himself if he gave up.

So he kept going.

Meanwhile, Gai had planted himself in front of him, abandoning the pretense of a casual stroll around the lake. Kakashi stopped, avoided his friend´s expectant stare, and shrugged without taking his hands out of his pockets. "You´re the one who walked away in the middle of our last conversation," he drawled.

Gai frowned, Kakashi could tell that much without actually looking at his face. The sudden tension in his folded arms gave him away. It was the kind of stance Gai used when overseeing his students training and his expression, Kakashi guessed, was the one reserved for the poor brat who collapsed during the 499th round around the village. The look that said, I thought you could do better than that.

Over the years it had had an almost miraculous effect on Gai´s Genin, Kakashi had to give him that, always inspiring the right mixture of shame, defiance, and deep down inside, but maybe strongest –especially in orphans – the craving for their teacher´s approval.

Needless to say, it had absolutely no impact on Kakashi.

"You know that I was only acting on orders from the Hokage," Gai offered when it became clear that Kakashi wouldn´t give him a direct answer to his question.

"She ordered you to criticize my training and then to run off when I do the same to you?" Kakashi scratched his nose in mock-confusion. "She must be getting old, that´s the strangest mission I´ve ever heard of."

Trust Gai to be the only person to fall for a provocation this blatantly obvious.

"Gah! I… you! That´s not the point! And it wasn´t an official mission. And…" Gai seemed to remember that he wasn´t supposed to be on the defense. He collected his wits and pulled his right arm out from under the crook of his left elbow in an exaggerated flurry of motion to point his finger at Kakashi´s nose, as if to remind himself where the blame had to be shoved; a sudden breeze underlining his movement by tossing a few leaves in the same direction.

"And you, my rival, are the one acting recklessly!"

Kakashi had to fight an eye roll because he really didn´t want to strain himself like that and provoke a headache, he already had enough of them as it was.

Gai was standing there, a few feet away from him in his private bubble of self-righteousness, sparkling in the sunlight like the surface of the lake. The picture of pure innocence, as if he had never done anything less than ideal.

Perhaps, Kakashi thought, if I just bring up Lee´s match at the last Chuunin exams, Gai will get off my back and leave me alone.

However, that would probably only throw them back to where they had been ten weeks ago. There had to be another approach to this.

"I talked to her, you know," Kakashi said conversationally. "She told me to quit my training. That I probably didn´t have the ability anyway." He smiled.

"WHAT?" Gai flinched so hard it made him stumble backwards, which in turn caused him to wave his arms around in a fight for balance. "But… but… She never said anything like that to me!" He sounded like he felt betrayed.

"She might be right," Kakashi continued, pretending not to notice Gai´s agitation. "I´m no Uchiha." And a slight hint of defeat crept into his words despite his best intentions.

Gai surprised him then.

He walked up to Kakashi until they were toe to toe; the younger Jounin watching each of the other´s steps, and still looking down at their feet in puzzlement when they were almost touching, until Gai slapped both of his hands down on Kakashi´s shoulders, making his chin jerk up.

"Are you going to give up?," he asked, his voice hard and steady. Kakashi stared into Gai´s eyes , closer and more intense than he could remember them ever being. Those big hands gripping his shoulders, the same hands that had pulled him out of the water at that time, were familiar and warm. This close, he could smell Gai´s minty breath and the sharp hint of his sweat. This close, he could almost feel the heat from the other man´s body.

A part of him wanted to wrench itself out of Gai´s grip, but in the chaos of his conflicting emotions it wasn´t influential enough to get his muscles to obey.

He didn´t know what he really wanted. Gai was too close to him, intruding into his personal space like that, like he wasn´t even aware that they weren´t supposed to be that close; that each of them had to have their own separate space. It made Kakashi angry and that was why his heart was beating so hard that he could barely hear anything over the white noise of the rush of blood in his ears.

Also, Gai had asked him a question he didn´t know how to answer again.

Kakashi didn´t want to give up, but he had been trying for a long time with absolutely no sign of progress. The rationalist in him told him that there might not even be a question anymore. However, he knew that he couldn´t say that to Gai, because it would only result in an 'encouraging' speech and the last thing he needed was Gai crying into his vest and telling him between sobs that everything would be alright if he just believed in himself. He wasn´t Rock Lee, for heaven´s sake.

He tore his gaze away from Gai´s too intense, dark eyes and asked coolly, "What difference does it make to you?" It startled Gai, this answer, again Kakashi could tell that much without meeting the other´s eyes. Gai´s fingers tightened on his shoulders, as if to keep him from slipping out of their grasp.

"You are my eternal rival and I believe in you. I won´t just let you give up."

Kakashi couldn´t help but sigh at that, it was as he had predicted; Gai thought that he needed his support and that a few words from him would have the power to change the facts, if he just put enough conviction into them. However, the moment he turned back to face Gai, he realized that one part of his prediction had not come true. There were no tears in the other man´s eyes, they were filled with nothing but steely determination. It was the expression he wore on the battlefield.

"I´m not giving up," Kakashi said. Though, as soon as he saw relief soften the lines of Gai´s face he added nonchalantly, "but none of that has anything to do with you." As he said it, Kakashi took his hands out of his pockets, wrapped his fingers around Gai´s wrists – not noticing the warmth of the other man's skin or the beat of his pulse against his sensitive fingertips – and pushed the older Jounin´s hands off his shoulders resolutely.

Gai let his hands drop to his sides, clenching them into fists hard enough to make his knuckles stand out white against his tanned skin. However, he was not one to back down at the first hint of resistance. And to Gai even a rejection this blatant fell into that category.

"Yes it does! We have been rivals for many years now and we have always pushed each other past our limits! Our challenges made us stronger; they are still making us stronger!" Gai had steadily raised his voice throughout his speech, but now he lowered it, brought his fists – from the look of his bulging triceps, they were clenched even harder than before – up to his chest, and caught Kakashi´s eye. "I can help you, Kakashi," he said, every word resounding with utter certainty.

The Copy Ninja snorted. Unlike most people in the village, he had never once openly mocked Gai – of course, the ones who laughed at Gai were only those who had never seen him fight, Kakashi couldn´t think of a single person who had looked at the 'Green Beast' in quite the same way after they had seen him on the battlefield – but he sure was tempted now.

Gai seemed to have lost touch with reality. Yes, they had been sparring for years, but in their case "sparring" could literally mean anything. They had had eating contests, footraces – even handstand races for that matter –, push up contests, drinking contests, that horrible who-can-do –the-most-back flips-without-getting-sick-competition, which Kakashi had lost rather spectacularly, and which was Never To Be Mentioned Again , and, of course, countless rounds of the ever popular game of rock, paper, scissors.

All in all, Kakashi was just a little skeptical about the helpfulness of those challenges when it came to actually improving his skills. Unless a handstand race was the secret key to master the Mangekyo, he couldn´t picture Gai being of any use to him in this respect.

Saying that outright, however, would probably only lead to an endless argument because Gai never backed down when it came to defending the importance of his sometimes absolutely ludicrous challenges.

And yet, there were words forming in his mind, trickling down onto the back of his tongue and pushing him to finally say them.

"We've never had a real challenge."

The words were left there, hanging in the air between them on this otherwise normal and quite beautiful afternoon. It was only Gai`s utter incomprehension that stood in the way of a full-blown outburst on his part, Kakashi suspected.

As it was, Gai just stared at him in bewilderment. "What do you mean? All of our challenges are real, they are the cornerstones of our rivalry!" Gai frowned, clearly trying his hardest to think up a way to steer this conversation back into a more familiar direction. "Well," he finally said in a more confident tone, "it's your turn to issue a new challenge anyway! Might as well make it a 'real' one this time, eh?"

Kakashi sighed, wondering silently how often Gai had elicited this reaction from him – probably more often than anyone else. "What I meant, Gai, was that all those – " He needed a second to come up with an insulting enough term for their usual activities. "Games we normally indulge in –" and he could already see that he was hitting a nerve. Gai's expression had changed ever so slightly. It was all in his eyes, Kakashi knew, and now there was steel in Gai's gaze. "Were completely pointless wastes of time." He said it with a twinkle in his eye and a dismissive shrug. "They say nothing about our respective skill and you know that too. Right, Gai?"

"Kakashi—" For once, Gai was holding back his emotions, but Kakashi could hear the anger; he could remember a hundred different ways Gai said his name, and he could count the times Gai had spoken his name like that on the fingers of one hand.

Unwilling to listen to whatever it was Gai wanted to tell him in that tone, Kakashi cut him off without raising his voice. "I want to fight you seriously." The words were enough, it didn't really matter how he presented them. He didn't believe in artificial sunsets, tears, and melodrama. It was said that kindness could kill, but Kakashi found that casualness worked much better for him.

Gai was apparently too stunned to react at all. He just stood and stared; not quite able to process what he had heard. "Seriously?" He asked eventually, sounding slightly faint, "you mean…?" He didn't finish the question. Not, Kakashi thought, because he was simply at a loss about what Kakashi meant, but because he didn't want to say it, lest he turned out to be right.

"No time limit, no restrictions – weapons, jutsus, everything goes – and the fight lasts until one of us is incapable of going on." Kakashi stated matter- of- fact-ly.

"But that's— you know that's impossible and insane!" Outrage and accusation were battling for dominance in Gai's voice. His eyes had gone wide and any second now he'd probably start grinding his teeth in frustration. Kakashi almost felt sorry for him, but he wasn't going to make this any easier for him – well, both of them really – any time soon.

"That's the challenge. Take it or leave it," spoken just like any other sentence.

Kakashi was prepared for furious yelling, even for Gai storming off in anger; however, he wasn't quite ready for Gai's searching gaze and the gentleness in his tone when he asked, "why?"

Somehow, it led him to lower his defenses for a moment and he found himself answering without thinking.

"You said you wanted to help, didn't you?" As replies went, this one was far more revealing than Kakashi had wanted it to be, but once said he couldn't take it back.

And of course, Gai had to choose this moment to be perceptive. "So it's about that…"

Kakashi cringed inwardly. "It's…" He faltered; there really was no way he could explain this to the other jounin. "Not something you need to understand. Let's leave it at that."

"It's dangerous. Extremely reckless," Gai said gravely. He cupped his chin and frowned in an unnecessarily obvious 'I'm thinking very hard'-manner. "There's no way we could do it here."

If Kakashi had had Gai's habit to express his every emotion physically, he would have had to keel over from the sheer force of Gai's sudden mood change. Going from condemning the challenge to wondering about the practicalities of going through with it in the space of less than a minute…

"You don't have any missions this week, right?" All sensei were off duty for the exam, and – inexplicably − so was Kakashi even though he didn't consider himself a teacher anymore. For some reason he couldn't quite fathom, Tsunade's definition of 'sensei' still included him.

Gai's immediate protest on the other hand was entirely expected. "That's because I'm supposed to train my students for the exam! They are definitely going to cross over into the much harder world of chuunin this time! These are their last days as innocent genin; I can't possibly leave them now!"

"Gai, I'm pretty sure they can spare you for a day or two. Just write them a training plan or something." He couldn't keep the amusement out of his voice; Gai could turn the most serious discussion around just by being himself. And that apparently also meant being an incredible mother hen.

Gai folded his arms over his chest in an effort to show that there really was no way he was going to give in. "No, this is an important time in their lives. As their teacher I have to put them first!"

Kakashi wasn't fooled for a second. He had mastered an attitude that combined his usual aloofness with an underlying dare; it never failed to irritate Gai into compliance. "Come on, Gai, it will probably do them good. You know, it'll prepare them for the cold realities of adult life, where people always abandon you when you need them the most. It will make them grow."

"Arrrgh…" Clearly caught off guard by the utter shamelessness of that argument, Gai was fighting with himself, but as usual he was unable to counter Kakashi's twisted logic. "Fine," he sighed.

"Good," Kakashi said. He was starting to feel tense. Were they really going to do this?

"There's a place – a clearing in the forest – about half a day southwest of Konoha. You know it, right?"

Gai nodded.

"It should be far enough from the village to not attract any attention." Hopefully, because the last thing he wanted was to have to explain this to the Hokage, especially after she had told him to let it go. "Meet me there the day after tomorrow. Let's say at noon."

Now, Kakashi thought, all he could do was wait and see. Gai still had the chance to back out of this more or less gracefully. He knew it, too, and was probably considering it right this second. Kakashi couldn't read him, however, his face was uncharacteristically blank; his eyes like endless space. Not dead or empty, but too vast and deep to read or understand. And when did he start rambling on and on about Gai's eyes? He was beginning to sound like Jiraiya's early short stories.

Tentatively, Gai broke the silence. "Kakashi… are you really sure about this?" It sounded suspiciously like the opening line for a long talk about things Kakashi didn't want to talk about.

"Just be there," he said curtly and turned to leave.

He half-expected Gai to stop him and was almost disappointed when he didn't.