Chapter 10:
A/N never thought I'd be writing a tenth chapter of this fic. Your reviews are what have kept me going. Thank you so very much! Enjoy!
Oh and obviously I'm no doctor, so don't judge the medical jargon (or lack of) in this chapter. Thanks!
….
"I swear it happened!", Jackson exclaimed desperately, pointing to the now still hand, lying back at April's side.
"I'm not saying she didn't", Derek held up a hand defensively.
"I was holding her hand and she squeezed it", he explained. "Yeah it was only really soft, but I swear on my grandmothers grave it happened! I didn't imagine it."
"Ok", the neurologist nodded. "It might have just been a muscle spasm. We need to run some tests to see whether we can reverse the drugs and bring her out".
"What are the chances of brain trauma?", Jackson asked anxiously. "Will she awake normally? Like without amnesia and all that?"
"In this case, there really wasn't much brain injury", Derek told him calmly. "The tests we run will determine whether the blood loss was significant to warrant worry about brain injury. At this stage, I'd say any brain trauma will be minimal".
"Ok", Jackson nodded appreciatively. "Thanks for that".
"I'll see if I can pull my weight and get those tests done now", Derek told him kindly before leaving the room.
Jackson sighed heavily and took April's hand once more.
"I know you squeezed my hand!", he told her resolutely. "I felt you do it! I'm not crazy and you're not brain dead! It's all gonna work out ok".
Pulling out his phone, he pressed the call button and placed it to his ear.
"Hello?", a voice answered.
"Hi Alice", he spoke. "It's Jackson".
"Oh hey!", she sounded like she was smiling. "You've called quick!".
"I just wanted to let you know, Doctor Shepherd came by just now. He's April's neurologist", Jackson told her impassively.
"Is April alright?", the dental student demanded, worry filling her voice. "What's happened".
"Nothing bad", Jackson reassured her quickly. "They just want to run some tests to see if it's safe to bring her out of the coma".
"That's a good thing right", Alice asked cautiously. "That means she's getting better, right?"
"Yeah", Jackson nodded. "Shepherd suspects minimal, if no, brain damage".
"Thank God!", Alice exclaimed with a happy sigh. "I'm gonna go tell Mum and Dad now! Thanks Jackson! Thanks so much!", and she hung up without another word.
Jackson put his phone back into his pocket and looked back at April. "It's gonna work out. You're gonna be alright. You need to be alright. I miss you so much. I just want to hear your voice again. I want to see your eyes looking at me. I need you here by my side".
Jackson settled down in the arm chair, close to April's beside and still clutching her hand in his, he closed his eyes and welcomed sleep.
….
"Wake up Dr Avery!", a sharp voice woke him with a shake on the shoulder.
He opened his eyes to find the nurse, Justine, staring at him disapprovingly.
"I'm sorry Justine", he smiled sheepishly. "I lost track of time".
The duty nurse glanced at his sceptically, but didn't push the matter, instead walking over to the window and opening the blinds. Jackson squinted at the bright sunlight.
"Doctor Shepherd was here about 20 minutes ago", she told him. "Said to page him when you were awake and he'd come back".
Jackson nodded wordlessly. Then he realised he was still holding April's hand. He leaned down and kissed it before walking out. Standing outside in the hallway, he stretched out his arms, supressing a yawn as he went. Turning his head, he came face to face with a smiling Derek Shepherd who was followed by Meredith, Yang and Hunt. They too looked pleased.
"Tell its good news!", Jackson told him warily as they approached.
"It's good news", Derek confirmed, nodding with a grin. "No brain trauma".
"You can bring her out?".
"Yeah", the handsome neurosurgeon nodded again. "Vitals are stable. Incision wounds are healing nicely. She's ready".
Jackson let out a heavy sigh of relief, leaning against the wall behind him. "That's amazing", he breathed under his breath.
"We'll do it first thing after rounds this morning", Derek informed him. "Then we'll monitor her until she opens her eyes".
Jackson nodded. For him, that moment couldn't come soon enough.
"Kepner will pull through just fine", Hunt interjected with a fond smile. "She's tough".
"I better inform her family", Jackson told them, excusing himself as he once again pulled out his mobile to call Alice. She picked up on the third ring with a bright greeting.
"Alice", he told her. "It's Jackson again".
"Jackson?", she questioned. "What's the matter?", her voice turning fearful.
"They're gonna reverse her coma today!", Jackson replied, eagerly. "April will hopefully wake up today!".
"That's amazing!", Alice squealed.
"What is going on?", Jackson heard a faint voice ask in the background. He suspected it was Karen.
"April might wake up today Mum!", Alice exclaimed fervently. "She's all better!".
"Oh my God", Karen answered. "I have to go tell your father and sisters!".
"Alice", Jackson lowered his voice warily. "The doctors aren't guaranteeing no brain trauma. We need to wait for her to wake up before we go there. Don't give your family false hope".
There was a long pause before Alice answered. Her voice too lowered to match his tone.
"But there isn't a guarantee that she'll wake up brain damaged and a vegetable", Alice countered coarsely, angered by his attitude. "My parents have been worried sick!", she exclaimed in a hush hiss. "My dad refuses to eat. My mother has been sitting by the phone all night and Libby spent the last eight hours pacing the hallway outside. They need this! They need the good".
Jackson was a doctor. He dealed with the families of patients on a daily basis. It was basically a golden rule of surgery. Never give false hope. Never promise. Never become attached. Well he'd broken the last one, but the first two still stood. He understood the reasons for the rules. A patient's condition can change in a literal split second. Fine one, dead the next. Giving a deep sigh in surrender he nodded.
"Fine", he huffed. "Just tell them about the reversing the coma thing. But don't give them the idea that she'll instantly become better", he told her warningly.
"Alright", Alice agreed sharply and hung up instantly. Stuffing the phone back in his pocket, Jackson leaned against the wall and closed his eyes, rubbing his face with his hands. A massive part of him also wanted to adopt Alice's optimism and believe that April would wake up without a single glitch. But he was a doctor. The medical part of his brain overrode the emotional. He knew the risk outweighed the positives. Plus, he just couldn't shift that weird feeling in his stomach that something bad would happen. It would probably lead to nothing, but it was the medical part of his brain talking.
…..
"Alright", Derek announced to the room as the nurse pushed the needle of liquid into April's IV tube. Her family were gathered around her bedside, the anxious stares plastered to their faces while Jackson stood at the back of the room, his face remaining impassive.
"That should come into effect in the next 2-3 hours, then we watch and wait for her to awake", Derek explained to a nervous looking Joe Kepner as he stood behind a seated Karen.
"Thank you so much Doctor!", Joe took Derek's hand and gave it a firm shake. "Thank you".
Derek glanced at Jackson for a second before walking out. He was followed by Alice who stopped in front of Jackson with an apologetic smile.
"Hey", she spoke gently. "I'm really sorry for being an ass earlier".
"Don't stress about it", Jackson waved his hand. "I get it. You wanted to be there for your family. You wanted to help them and help yourself understand all this".
"Yeah", Alice nodded in agreement. "I'm glad you understand".
"I do", Jackson replied. "I see it every day. The optimism that families desperately seek to help them pull through their loved ones surgery. It does help", he reassured her.
Alice beamed at him, glad that he understood. April was her older sister. Her idol. If a little false hope was what would get her through, she was happy to believe it.
"I think I might go on a coffee run", Alice broke the silence between them. "My dad seriously needs some caffeine".
Jackson smiled and nodded, allowing Alice past him and out the door.
Now they waited.
…..
Jackson sat alone in April's room, holding her hand. She was still on the ventilator and the machines beeped regularly around him, filling the silence.
"April", he spoke, his voice hoarse. "You know I'm not usually a coward, but I want to say something and I think this is the perfect time because you're unconscious, probably can't hear me and won't freak out when I say this".
He took a deep breath. "I love you", he stated simply. "I love you. And I've loved you for the long time. San Francisco really cemented that for me. Everything that's happened in-between has kinda been a total mess, and it's taken me a while to get to this point. But all my feelings are starting to click. And I've realised exactly what I feel for you. I love.."
The sharp beeping of the machines interrupted his voice. He glanced at the monitor above her head. Her vital were going up. Her brain activity was increasing. His eyes darted back to April and he saw her head move slightly. Her brow creased in a frown and her fingers twitched underneath his grip.
This was it!
Bending down, Jackson pushed the red nurses button on the side of the bed a couple of times. "April?", he questioned, taking her hand. "Squeeze my hand if you can hear me".
Almost immediately, he felt April's cold fingers wrap around his. Relief filled every cell of his body. April's eyes slowly began to flutter open and Jackson smiled down at her reassuringly. "Hey April. I'm here. It's gonna be alright". She frowned further and lifted her hand, reaching for the intubating tube coming out of her mouth. Jackson took her hand and kissed it. "Don't touch that yet", he spoke soothingly. "We'll get the nurses in here and take it out in a second. It'll be ok". April looked up at Jackson and their eyes locked. He looked into her large, wide brown ones and cringed inwardly. They were brimming with fear. He hated seeing her that vulnerable.
"It'll all be ok", he comforted her. He was interrupted by a group of nurses coming into the room.
"Prepare for extraction of intubating tube", he instructed them firmly, taking a pair of latex gloves and pulling them on in two quick movements, leaning over April as began his work.
When he'd finished, he smiled down at her comfortingly. "How are you feeling?", he asked, rubbing her hand gently as the nurses filed out of the room.
She opened her mouth to speak but only managed to croak out "-od". Jackson grinned involuntarily at her. She was so adorable.
"That's good", he replied encouragingly. "Your voice will come back. Give your throat a chance to recuperate. Can I get you anything?".
"Wa-r", she rasped. "St-y".
"Alright", Jackson walked over to the small table in the corner of the room and poured her a glass of water from the jug. There were some straws nearby, plucking one, he placed it in the cup and walked back over to her. He guided the straw to her lips and waited patiently as he took a few small sips. Giving him a grateful smile, she settled back into the pillows.
"I missed you so much!", he sighed with a small smile, placing the cup back. "I can't believe this happened to you. I hated seeing you hurt. I'm so grateful you're ok April", he took her hand and kissed it. She smiled weakly in response.
"We'll talk about all that later", he told her. "Your family is here. Do you want me to call them?".
April's eyes grew slightly wider and she shook her head. "Do-t nnoy em. Late".
"Alright", Jackson agreed, squeezing her hand. "I got to meet Alice", he explained to her. "She's pretty great. So much like you", he grinned. April beamed proudly in response. She was glad Jackson was getting along with her favourite sister. He was a big part of her life now. She considered him a part of her family and hoped the rest of her family would too.
Her eyes involuntarily fluttered and Jackson realised just how tired she must be. Kissing her hand once more, he smiled kindly. "You rest up now. I'll just text Alice and tell them you're awake now. They've been sitting by your bedside all day so they'll want to know. I'll tell them to come tomorrow morning and see you".
April nodded once before she closed her eyes and was already asleep. Beaming down at her, he bent down and planted a kiss on her lips, gently stroking her soft auburn hair before he left the room.
…
Hope you haven't forgotten about me. I had a little bit of writers block writing this chapter, but I've finally got it all out. Hopefully you enjoy it!
So I'm majorly pissed off and disappointed with Shonda Rhimes for making Jackson sleep with Edwards. Like that has to one of the worst pairings ever! I understand that it's a drama and there has to be like relationship and sexual tension between April and Jackson, but I'm worried that Jackson will actually start to like Edwards and it'll become serious…therefore April will be left behind in the dust. Fingers crossed that in the next few weeks, April and Jackson swallow their pride and GET TOGETHER!
Review! And feel free to rant too!