- BioWare own everything! I'm just playing in their dragon and darkspawn-filled sandbox.
Chapter 13 - (Unwanted) Twin Connection
"Bitch" an insult he had wanted to aim at her for the longest time and he finally had the chance to.
He growled feeling the sting of Hawke's staff slapping across his back.
"You know," said Hawke slowly, ducking another swing from her powerhouse of a brother "I liked you better when you were younger and unable to talk."
"That's funny. I liked you better when you weren't an overconfident scoundrel with a pathetic excuse for a sense of humour." Carver shot back "Oh, wait!"
The blade of his sword met the sturdy Ironbark of Hawke's staff, who lifted it to parry her brother's blow. He let out a frustrated huff and came at her again from the side. He hadn't expected Leto to have trained up her so well in the short time he was away fighting at Ostagar.
It was a win-win situation Hawke had decided. She got to spend more time with her boyfriend (that wasn't full of awkward silences or pitiful attempts at conversation) while he taught her how to defend herself. And when/if she landed a hit on him, it would help her perfect her healing spells.
The elf was surprised when Hawkes blade started to nick his flesh.
"I'm so sorry, Leto" she cried, dropping her staff on the grass and grabbing the elf's hand she'd sliced open through the worn leather of his gloves. "I thought you were going to block that sneaky move."
If he was honest a bit of his pride deflated slightly. He hadn't even seen the move incoming; the mage had flicked her wrists so fast. He didn't even have a chance to feel the sting of the wound before her hands had clasped around it. He had blinked in surprise.
"You shouldn't apologize to the enemy every time you land an attack on him" he said smoothly covering his surprise with a scowl.
"You are no enemy" she laughed lightly, her fingertips starting to glow a fuzzy green with healing magic. "You are an amazing boyfriend helping me like this. I didn't think I could ever strike you with how fast your reflexes are"
"Lucky shot" he grumbled. "Though do you learn rather quickly for a mage" His scowl faltered as Hawkes lip slipped through the hole in his glove, placing a kiss over the wound. The Lyrium on the other side hummed to the effects of Hawks soft magic.
It was so strange to feel only a small discomfort, instead of the pain usually brought on by magic he couldn't stop himself sighing.
"Well, I do have the best elven warrior as my teacher" Hawke beamed at him, the elf had to bite down the urge to smile sheepishly at the compliment she'd just given him.
She pulled the split in the leather glove open enough to inspect where the wound had been minutes ago the tanned skin showing a thin white scar as the signs of the dagger ever being dug into it. She grinned, "I'm getting the rather good at this, huh?"
Carver appeared behind them, arms crossed over his chest "For a staff twirling noodle you do alright…"
He refused to be bested at this by his sister.
"Come on Carver! I know your hungover but pick up your game man!" Leto barked sounding and looking the part of an army commander, pacing the outside of the battle circle they'd drawn in the dirt "While in this arena she is no longer your sister. She is the enemy. Treat her like one. Control your swings, don't let your inferiority complex cloud your mind. I want Grace to have a nice bloody sheen after this"
"What?!" The mage yelped, staring wide-eyed at the elf
"My game, my rules." The elf said simply, tilting the blade of Mercy so it caught the sun and momentarily blinded the mage long enough for Carver to land a hit to her calf.
"I am your girlfriend! You can't order him to – Ouch! You little shit!"
"All's fair in love and war" he smirked almost wickedly at his own play on words.
"This is totally barbaric!" Bethany screeched from somewhere behind the elf "Why do you think it's such a good idea to give the angry soldier a sharp sparking blade, provoke him and put him into a ring with my sister?"
"It's refreshing not to be on the receiving end of the angry soldier with the sharp sparking blade?" he said offhandedly, stoking the flat length of Mercy. She didn't really expect him to say he oddly found an endless amusement in the two Hawkes competing against each other for a chance to spar with him.
Both in and out of the ring.
The differences in the way they advanced on the elf were as different as their class. The Mage dominate and borderline obsessive with her touches and that fire back in her whisky-gold eyes where the Warrior was subtle with his secretive touches and the way his longing lingered in those depths of blue was enough to drive someone insane.
He almost caved in to that nagging urge to kiss the younger Hawke when he saw that look on his face but he wanted Carver to man up and just admit it already so those pestering day-dreams would….
He wasn't sure where that thought would have ended up if Bethany's voice wasn't ringing in his ears
"Call them off" the female twin demanded sounding eerily like her mother with that tone "Now! Before one of them loses an arm"
"Hawke asked me to train her in battle and that's what I'm doing. Carver is just as skilled with a blade as I and has the temperament to match a possible enemy. Lothering will be the first to fall if the boys at Ostagar can't hold the tide of darkspawn back and you will have more of a chance at getting out alive if the mage knows how to fight in close combat"
The truth no one wanted to hear. The threat of the darkspawn was real. It was just a matter of time before the hoard grew too large for the Wardens or King Cailan's army to hold back.
"But she is a mage we have control over the elements we can-"
"You won't have the time to mutter half your silly fire enchantment before the darkspawn tear you to shreds, little mage" he huffed crossing his arms over his chest and turning his eyes back to the sparring pair.
Shaking his head at the scene before him the eldest had pinned her brothers' arms down to his sides by a crushing prism, held the centre of her staff under his throat and pulling at the hair from the back of Carver's skull. "Hair pulling is not a move to waste your time on, Hawke." He scolded "Darkspawn do not have hair and your brother probably wants what little hair he has to remain attached to his head"
"Fine." She sighed calling off the spell and lowering her staff.
Carver staggered forward a step "You cheated! I would have won that round if you weren't trying to show off to your boyfriend" he glared at her, the word tasted foul on his tongue. He made a frustrated noise and stalked out of the circle roughly bumping into Leto's shoulder as he past.
Bethany caught the expression on the Tevinter's face as he looked over his shoulder at the Swordsman's retreating form. And the look Carver did over his a few paces later once the elf had turned back to face Hawke and start their match.
Bethany caught all the looks, smiles and touches that had passed between the two boys for years. She always thought they were because they had such a strong bond, they were the best of friends, the two practically attached at the hip. You hardly ever saw one without the other being close by.
But now she was almost positive there was something deeper between them. Over the recent months she's noticed the hardened look on her twins face. The way he watched Leto like he was expecting him to be attacked or disappear at any second. The way his eyes darkened with something she didn't think she would ever see directed at his best friend: Longing. She would never have thought her twin would be the type to go after another male but there was the proof written so clearly on his face.
Maker, he had it bad.
Bethany was sure the strong aura of longing Carver was carrying around was starting to rub off on the elf and he seemed to be slowly starting to fall for her twin. Or maybe he was just trying to cheer up the other boy by offering small touches to the shoulder or arm. She thought she would be disturbed by the silent 'romance' going on between them but she found it odd but unbelievably cute.
Carver leaned Grace up against the side of a nearby tree and sat down next to the blade. He pressed his back into the wide trunk and looked up into the branches above. A pair of love birds were preening each other, the darker bird rubbing its cheek on the others bright chest and tweeting happily.
He scowled at them.
Everyone – his twin, his mother, the barkeep, his circle of friends in the army and the Grey Wardens even the birds had their special somebody they could love openly and have the affection returned. And Carver was alone, left out of it all because of an unnatural hold that pesky elf had on his heart.
And they were constantly rubbing their happiness in his face. It wasn't fair. Was it too much to ask to be loved back? He sighed and thumped his head against the wood
"Carver?" Bethany's soft voice pulled him from his thoughts as she sat down next to her twin. "Can I ask you something?"
Probably fishing for gift ideas for that Templar boy toy of hers… He shrugged "Uh, sure, what's on your mind?"
"And I want you to answer this honestly." he nodded his agreement slowly, he was already regretting it when she hesitated, bitting her lip before she spoke "Is there… something going on between you and Leto?"
That took him by completely by surprise. "What?" Had he been that obvious? No, he was always subtle with his ways of showing the elf he cared about him without seeming like he wanted anything more than friendship. He tried to make his voice sound defensive and repulsed at the idea of it but it came out echoing his hurt and defeat as he hung his head. "..No"
"But you want there to be." A statement, not a question.
I missed my chance now I have to live with it.
He cast his eyes to the couple in the ring. Leto moved almost gracefully around the ring parrying every attack from the staff. Hawke glided around him and jumped onto his back to land a surprise kiss to the elf's cheek.
That should be us…
"I'll take that silence as a 'yes'. I am your twin, Carver, and a mage with empathy I can feel the pain and the guilt you are feeling here" she put her hand to the left side of his chest "I see a sadness in your eyes even though you try to hide it. At first I couldn't figure out why, I thought it was because of what you would have seen or done on the battle-field. But… I've been watching you ever since you pulled Leto from the lake and the way you act around him it's clear he is the reason for it. I didn't think you of all people would– "
"Look, you think I asked for this?!" he snapped, "Well I didn't." a few bricks of the wall around his heart falling away, the honesty of his words making his voice crack "I - I can't. For so many reasons…. I want all these feelings to go away. For things to be like they were before. I don't want to be –" he made a face, running a hand through his hair "…different."
"Oh Carver" She wrapped an arm around his broad shoulders and pulled him close. "We cannot chose who we fall for. Whether you like it or not your heart wants him. I see it so clearly in your eyes, I don't know how I missed it before but it might as well be tattooed on your forehead you… love him don't you?"
He made a growl-like noise, clenched his jaw as if it would hold down the blush that was threatening to creep onto his cheeks. He pulled himself roughly away from the embrace and looked away at a random spot off in the distance.
Curse his twin and that connection between them that allowed her to poke around in his secrets.
"I do not mean to pry into your personal life like that. I'm sorry. I want you to know I will always be here for you no matter what and if you ever wish to talk about anything you have my ear 24/7."
He turned to her furrowing his eyebrows and asking softly, "You don't… hate me?"
"Maker, no! Why would I? You're my twin brother you have my love and support no matter how you chose to live your life or who you chose to live it with. I just want you to be happy, Carv, you deserve it more than anyone I know."
"You can't tell this to anyone, Beth, not even mother and especially not Hawke. She will burn me at the stake or skin me alive herself if she ever found out."
"I promise your secret is safe with me" she wrapped her little finger around one of his and squeezed it, sealing the promise. "Have you told him how you feel?"
"What? No! Are you crazy?! What do you want me to do? walk up to him and be like 'hey Leto, I have a confession I've secretly been in love with you for the last 3 years'" he snorted "Yeah… that's not exactly something you bring up casually in conversation to someone who carries around a sword as big as what I am."
Elven ears twitched at the mention of his name. A smile spreading over his face as the rest of the words reached him.
Curse his wired emotions and his mouth running off on its own like that. Leto probably heard all of that…I am a dead man. He thumped his head hard against the tree truck
"Three years…?" she repeated in awe, Carver had done an amazing job keeping this under her radar and keeping it out of The Fade when they shared the dream world for so long. She smiled in mysteriously-knowing way at him. "I don't think it would go as badly as you think, brother"
He rolled his head to look at her. Did he tell her something? No, he wouldn't talk. He's just as stubborn as I am. Can she poke around in other people's secrets? Does he….?
"As scary as it may be you need to tell him, you need to know where you stand. Just trust your twin on this. You never know, he may just have a thing for you too." She smiled.
He cast he an 'as if' expression.
A shadow stepped in front of him blocking out the afternoon sun. It was probably Hawke coming over to tease him about losing or his face being so red. He was about to tell her to 'fuck off' in the politest way possible. His words swiftly died in his throat when he turned his head and came almost literally face-to-face with Leto.
The Swordsman made the most unmanly squeak of surprise.
"Not talking about me are you?"
"I – I… uhh… no" he stammered, his cheeks burning with embarrassment. "W-why would we be talking about y-you"
The Tevinter elf put a hand on the trunk above Carver's right shoulder for balance as he leaned towards the younger boys' ear. "You look so cute when you blush, Carvy" he whispered, smirking, lips ghosting against the flesh as he spoke
"Meet me back here at twilight. I want to show you something" Leto said. Carver was almost sure he caught the elf discreetly wink at him before he stood to his full height and ruffled his dark hair. No, trick of the light he was just blinking with one eye….?
"Uhh okay. I – I guess I'll see you… later then?"
He thumped his head against the tree trunk again at how awkward he sounded.
"Looks like somebody just got a daaate" Bethany said in a sing-song voice, pushing at her twins shoulders playfully.
"What? No." he shook his head "No, no. no it's defiantly not. He probably just… wants to show off his latest complex way of disarming an enemy or something" He said, shoving his twin back "As far as I know 'dates' do not include being introduced to your insides by the business end of The Blade of Mercy"
"Oh, stop being such a drama-queen brother" she kissed his cheek. "Maybe he does just want to show you a new trick, maybe he doesn't…. But do you really think he would kill you for being honest?"
"I would kill me if I was him"