Another Tigress/Shifu one-shot, as requested by readers.

I've noticed from a lot of other fan fictions that the ways in which Shifu and Tigress talk to each other about mistakes in the past are roughly all the same. So in this one-shot, I've decided to take a… uh… different approach…

"Okay, guys!" Po called out. "Dinner's ready!"

"Finally!" Mantis was the first into the kitchen, everyone else following close after.

"What are we having today, Po?" Viper asked as they gathered round the large table.

"Bean paste dumplings." Po said. "I thought it would be a nice change from noodles."

"Hmmm… Master Oogway once said that the smallest changes are often the best." Shifu smiled as he took his bowl.

"With the exception of the number of almond cookies decreasing from fifteen to three." Mantis chortled. Po scowled in his direction.

After three minutes of eating in silence, Po tentatively spoke up.

"Uh… guys? I was wondering if you could all do me a small favor."

"And what is that, Po?" Shifu looked up from his dumplings.

"You, see, my dad is trying to expand his business to drinks now." Po said. "He's got an idea for a peach/plum juice combination, and he needs some people to taste it."

"Is this drink alcoholic?" Shifu asked, eyes narrowed.

"No, dad's not planning on selling alcohol. He wants his drinks to be family-friendly."

"Come on, Master Shifu…" Monkey said. "What harm can it do?"

"Alright then." Said Shifu.

"Awesome!" Po swiftly pulled out six cups and plonked them on the counter. Next he pulled out a large bottle.

"Hang on a sec while I pour them out." Said Po.

"Have you tried this yourself?" Tigress asked.

"Sure." Said Po. "It tastes awesome, but my dad wants more than one taster."

With his back to the group, Po began pouring the peace/plum juice combination into the numerous cups.

In the cup that would be Mantis's, Po poured in an eighth of a liter of rice wine.

Ever since Mantis had ratted Po out to Monkey over the stolen almond cookies, Po had been searching for a non-life threatening way to get the insect back. His chance had arisen after he had learned that Mantis apparently had a low tolerance for alcohol.

Po just had to hope that no-one would guess what he had done.

"Okay, everyone! Here you are!" Po carried the tray full of cups over to the table on one hand.

"I honestly think I'll like this!" Viper said as she took her cup.

"Same here." Said Crane as he did the same.

"Just in case, the water bucket's over there in the corner." Mantis laughed. He didn't notice the mischievous look on Po's face as he took his own cup.

One everyone had taken their cups, Po set the tray down and sat at the table in between Tigress and Shifu. He eyed Mantis as the bug sipped from his cup, waiting for the fun to begin.

After a few seconds, everyone took their first sips.

"So what do you guys think?" Po asked.

"It's delicious, Po." Said Tigress. The others nodded in agreement.

"Mantis, how do you feel?" Po smirked.

"I feel great!" Mantis beamed. "Seriously, I think this drink is now officially…"

"Oh woe, what's wrong with me, Tigress?"

Everyone froze, and turned their heads to the red panda clutching his cup with both hands.

"Uh… what do you mean, Master?" Tigress blinked.

"Why can't I get it right, Tai Lung?" Shifu swayed slightly in his chair. "First Tigress, and now you! Why can't I seem to get it right?"

Everyone stared at Shifu's display. Po had a sinking feeling that he may have gotten the cups mixed up during the serving.

"I mean…" Shifu picked up his cup and clambered onto the table to face Tigress properly. "With Tai Lung, I gave him nothing but praise, and he turned into a monster! With you, I gave you anything but praise… and you turned into an ice queen!"

Tigress leaned backwards in her chair in shock.

"What's happening?" Viper whispered.

"I think he's drunk." Crane whispered back.

"Po, what the hell did you do?" Mantis stared at the panda.

"I don't know!" Po lied. "How the heck did he get so drunk after just one sip?"

"Shifu has an alcohol tolerance even lower than mine." Mantis muttered. "We learned that the hard way."
"You mean when you guys lost him for two days in Lijiang city?" Po glared at him.

In the meantime, Shifu fell on his knees and then shuffled closer to Tigress.

"I am such a loser!" Shifu gulped from his cup before continuing. "I am such an itty bitty loser!"

"No you're not." Tigress said, sounding calmer than she felt. "You just made some small mistakes, that's all. Everyone does it."
"Oh no, no, no, no…" Shifu waved a finger at her. "When Commander Vachir refused to tighten the security around Tai Lung, that was a small mistake… denying you the love and affection you were entitled to after I adopted you… was COLOSSAL! Look at what I've turned you into!" Shifu hiccupped.

Tigress's amber eyes went wide as dinner plates.

Never had he ever told her any of this before.

"Instead of healing your wounds, I left them open." Shifu lowered himself into a crouch, emphasizing his sadness. "I told you I'm a loser. In fact, if I were you… I would punch me, right in the mouth! Tai Lung did!"

Shifu crawled over to Tigress and tugged on one of her chain clasps pleadingly.

"Please hit me!" He moaned like a little boy. "Pretty please! Hit me, hit me, please, pleaaaaaaaaseeee…."

"No, I won't!" Tigress said firmly, grabbing Shifu's hand and gently priding it from her vest.

"Oh, okay." Shifu pouted, and then sipped from his cup, only to find that it was empty. He spun round on his knees to face Po.

"Is there any more peach/plum juice combination drink?" He asked, holding the cup out in front of him expectedly.

Po silently refilled his cup, and Shifu shuffled back round to Tigress.

"Can I tell you a little secret?" He asked, staring at the feline with puppy-dog eyes.

"Uh… okay." Tigress said.

"I fibbed when I said that you would never surpass Tai Lung."

Tigress stared.

"What are you talking about?" She asked.

"When Tai Lung first attempted the obstacle course, he completed it in eight minutes." Shifu giggled. "You did it in five. That's… severely cool!"

Tigress bit her lip, unsure of what to say.

"Sorry for stealing your line, Po!" Shifu called out.

"It's alright." Po quickly said.

"Uh, Master Shifu…" Tigress began.

"No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, NO!" Shifu waved his hands in front of him, silencing her. "I am your father, so from now on, I want you to call me father, dad, daddy, pater, dada, or baba… whichever works for you!"

"Um, okay…" Tigress hesitated. "Baba…" Shifu lit up like the sun in a clear sky. "I think it's time you went to bed."

"You called me baba! YAAAAAY!" Shifu leapt into the air with joy, startling the students surrounding him. After celebrating for a few seconds, he staggered over to Tigress, until they were literally face-to-face. "And now… I'm going to hug you… my sweet little lotus blossom…"

This was the LAST thing Tigress was expecting.

"Um, okay." Said Tigress lamely. Then she gasped slightly as Shifu fell forwards onto her chest and wrapped his arms around her as far as he could.

"Oh, and before I pass out…" Shifu's face was buried in Tigress's vest, muffling his voice. "Po, I tasted the rice wine in the peach/plum juice. Once I become sober… I'm gonna kill you."

Po gulped as Shifu went limp in Tigress's arms.

Well, what do you think? Keep those reviews and requests coming, and I'll be even happier than drunken Shifu!