AN: woo so idk it's been a while since i last updated bc of finals and school but i finally finished this chapter and i hope you like it! enjoy! c:
Disclaimer: I don't own naruto or anyone. if i did they'd be my personal sex slaves.
Ch. 3
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? ART IS A FUCKIN' EXPLOSION UN!"
"WRONG. ART IS ETERNAL BEAUTY!"
Naruto groaned. He'd been here for hours, and the majority of the time was spent arguing over art. All he wanted to do was go home, have a nice bath, and maybe get a little high.
"NARU-CHAN AGREES WITH ME. RIGHT? YOU TOTALLY THINK ART'S AN EXPLOSION UN!"
Never mind, scratch that. He was going to get fucking baked.
The only thing keeping him from ripping everyone's throats out was that Kyuubi promised him Ichiraku ramen before going home. He hadn't had Ichiraku's in forever. His mouth was just watering thinking about it. Man oh man, how he missed his ramen.
Kyuubi looked at his younger sibling and noticed the far off look in his eyes. Chuckling to himself, he knew exactly what the little fox was thinking about.
"Hey Kit, ready to go? Ramen shop is closing up soon."
Just hearing the words "ramen" and "closing" in the same sentence was enough to have Naruto out the door within seconds.
"Wait, you guys are leaving already un?" asked Deidara, though still yammering on about how "fine art is the beauty of that single fleeting moment of explosion" and other nonsence.
Naruto stood by the door observing Deidara while waiting for his brother. Deidara held Naruto's interest when he first arrived. The male was around 19, and lean in stature. He was at an average height, around 5'5". He had long blonde hair that he kept in a ponytail atop his head, though his bangs covered one of his eyes, which where a unique blueish-purpleish color. He was quite attractive. Naruto would admit to at least that much. He got really annoying though when he started talking about art. It was like that with Sasori too.
Sasori was Deidara's flat mate, who also loved art, though he perceived it differently from his blonde friend. He was a bit short and looked way younger than his initial age. He had nice shade of brown eyes and deep red hair. He was too, attractive, but like Deidara, was annoying the moment the word "art" slipped past his lips.
"Yeah, I promised to take Naru-chan to dinner and I'm pretty sure he's starving by now." Kyuubi answered the blonde artist.
"Well, alright. See you some other time!" Sasori said, turning back to Deidara to continue their argument.
"See ya Hidan." Naruto said, but realized that the silver haired man was asleep – though he had absolutely no idea how, with all they yelling – so he just left without another word, Kyuubi right behind him.
The duo got in Kyuubi's car and made their way downtown to Ichiraku's, however, the car ride was too silent for the redheads liking, and found it strange that Naruto hadn't uttered a single word since entering the car.
"Why so quite Kit?" Kyuubi asked the blonde.
"I'm just tired. And I have a headache too. Damn, do Deidara and Sasori ever shut the fuck up?" Naruto shook his head, still astonished at how the two flat mates are able to live together.
The redhead chuckled. "Not really, actually no. Not ever. Wow, I wonder how they've been able to live together for so long." Kyuubi seemed to ponder this for a moment but then snapped his attention back to Naruto. "Anyway, let's get to Ichiraku's before they close for the night."
The two brothers stepped out of the car once they've arrived and made entered the ramen hut. They were sitting there and enjoying their food, especially Naruto. He was on his 4th bowl and was nowhere near full. It was like he was in heaven, partying with Jesus and having the orgy of his life. Oh how he missed Ichiraku's. He didn't even know how he was able to live without it for so long.
"So, you excited to start school tomorrow?" Kyuubi asked, finishing his one and only bowl of ramen.
"Are you seriously asking me that right now?" Naruto asked back, taking a break from eating to look at his brother.
"Well, I mean, uh. Aren't you excited to see your old friends? Like that dog lover and that genius…. What's his name? Shikamichi right?"
Naruto just rolled his eyes "It's ShikaMARU, not michi, and I guess I am, but I doubt they'll remember me. Even if they did, I bet they won't even associate themselves with me. I mean, look at me! I'm a fucking mess! They remember me as a 6 year old girl who loved life, always smiled, and didn't know when to shut her annoying fucking mouth, not a 17 year old guy, with stupid, ugly scars on his face and a shitty personality." The blonde pushed his food away and clenched his fists, seeming to lose his appetite and stood up. "I'm finished. Can we go?"
Kyuubi sighed and ran a hand through his hair. He paid for the food and the brothers made their way back to the house, where they found their parents watching TV.
"Mom, Dad, we're home." Naruto called out, he was still a bit angry with the conversation he had with Kyuubi beforehand, but calmed down a bit since.
"Welcome home kids!" Kushina said, coming out of the living room to give her two boys suffocating hugs. "What did you guys do today?"
"We just enrolled… Naruto in school and… met up with… some friends. We also… already… ate so we're not… hungry…" Kyuubi choked out; his mother was just too strong for her own good, he seriously couldn't breathe.
"Aw how cute! Did you guys have fun?" Kushina squeaked excitedly.
"Mom…. can't…. breathe…" Naruto gasped, trying his hardest to get away from Kushina's death grip.
She released the boys immediately and smiled sheepishly, whispering a quiet "oops" to herself.
Kyuubi just chuckled and scratched the back of his head. "Yeah, I guess we had fun. Well, more like I had fun and little Naru-chan just sat there, slowly plotting multiple different ways to kill everyone."
"Naruto!" the redheaded woman gasped. "You know how I feel about you when you do things like that!"
"But mommmmmmmm" the blonde whined, "They just wouldn't SHUT. UP. The entirety of the time was literally spent with me sitting in between two people who are crazy obsessed with art and kept disagreeing with each other the whole time. And it wasn't even civilized either! It was like a fucking battlefield! There was shit flying EVERTYWHERE! They're worse than granny on one of her bad days! I mean, they're good people and everything, hell, they're super nice and funny, not to mention hot, but until they start talking about art, UGH, I just want to rip my fucking hair out!" The blonde finished, huffing and puffing, trying to calm himself down, knowing how badly his anger can get out of hand.
Kushina and Kyuubi just stared at the blonde in front of them. Who knew the kid had such a set of lungs? He didn't even take a breath between sentences; he just spurted everything out of his mouth like there was no tomorrow.
"Well um… I'm glad you had some fun." Kushina said hesitantly, knowing how Naruto gets if he gets too angry. She's been on the wrong end of his outbursts one to many times.
Minato chose this time to make himself known, and grace everyone with his presence.
"Hey, what's goin' on?"
"Naru's having a mental breakdown." Kyuubi replied calmly.
"AM NOT" Naruto yelled.
"Sure you are." The redheaded brother retorted, ruffling Naruto's hair.
"Uhh, yeah. Glad to see everyone's doing well." Minato said a bit awkwardly. "ANYWHO, it's getting late and I'm going to bed. Comin' babe?" The blonde looked over to his wife.
"Yeah, yeah, I'm comin'." Said wife replied. "Goodnight you two, don't stay up too late Naru!" and then she was gone.
"Well kit, I'm gonna head back to my place. I'll be over here at 6 to make sure you're awake and ready for your first day. See ya." The redheaded hugged his brother briefly before leaving.
"Yeah, see ya nii-san." Naruto muttered after his Kyuubi shut the door, fully aware that redhead didn't hear him.
Naruto started up the stairs, heading his way to the bathroom to take a quick shower and then to his own room. The whole way there, he just kept thinking to himself.
"Ugh, this is just great. Now I have to go to school tomorrow. I hated school in Suna, so what makes mom and dad think I'll like school here? I mean, I guess it's cool to have a fresh start and everything though. Too much drama back there. Stupid Gaara. I swear, if anyone tries anything funny with me, I'll fucking clobber em', no matter who it is. Heh, only thing I'm looking forward to is seeing the look on everyone's faces when they see me. I mean, if they remember me that is. Well, whatever. Let's just get everything over with… ugh, what if… what if the same thing happens again here, like it did in Suna? No, it will defiantly not happen. I'll make sure of it. And Kyuu and Hidan and everyone else have my back, right? Right. Nothing will happen. I have nothing to worry about. Yup, nothing to worry about whatsoever. I'll just, take a shower and then smoke a bowl and everything will be fine."
The blonde teen walked into the bathroom and hopped into the shower. He washed himself until he felt refreshed. Since he didn't need to re-bind himself when he was fully dry, he trudged his way to his room and locked the door. Only clad in his towl, he let it drop to the floor and looked at himself in the mirror disapprovingly.
"Stupid boobs. Why do they have to be so big?" he thought. "I'd look so much better without them. And ugh, if I just had a fucking dick, everything would be perfect. Fuck being female, there's nothing great about it."
Naruto put on a baggy t-shirt that had his favorite band on it and his sweats, not caring about underwear at the moment. He took out his stash of weed and his pipe and packed himself a nice bowl. He lit the drug and inhaled an impressive amount of smoke, letting his mind slip away into carefree, happy thoughts.
"Yup, nothing's gonna ruin my day tomorrow. Nothing."
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